Preview Special From Hell (or too much Veronica can't be good)

 

Well well…Inferno's premiere is just a week away.  How excited are we?  So the Gauntlet is over, so what's on this Monday night?  A special: Battle Scars from Gauntlet to Inferno!  I was really looking forward to this, because I knew I'd get to see juicy tidbits left out of Gauntlet, and a sneak peak at Inferno.  But then I thought to myself…isn't this really a reunion type show mixed in with a preview special…all in thirty minutes? …this isn't going to work out. 

 

So we start off segment one of the show.  Not too surprisingly most of the first section is about Gauntlet.  We hear more details about some of the more interesting storylines that occurred on the Gauntlet right???  No.  Sorry, but the thing they talked about most in the first segment was the Rachel, Veronica, and Abe threesome…and unless they have changed the rules of TV where you can get hot triple X action…there's not much else they can show!  Although it's good to know that Rachel doesn't regret the threesome.  So why the hell is she so glad they didn't show her kissing Abe.  Eh, perhaps she doesn't regret that they didn't follow them to Abe's hotel where the 3 of them had the real threesome!  Yeah that'd be an inside scoop.  But you'd have to go to Norman's site for that detail.  Thanks Norm!

 

There was lots of talk about Irulan also.  Yes Irulan was a poor sport many times during the Gauntlet.  And Theo was glad to see her go, (along with many other people…including production) and Alton was mad.  So mad that they had to lock him in the basement apparently.  I hope they at least slid food to him under the door, and made sure to give him a bucket to pee in.  Oh well…They obviously let him out for the next mission!  They had to; he was pretty much the only reason they won missions. 

 

We hear the discussion on the girls getting voted off first.  This was really more so the case on the Real World team than Road Rules.  No one even went to the gauntlet but Sarah anyway.  Katie throws the discussion Adam's way, and we get to see an interesting shot of Dave adjusting his junk…mmmmmm!  Was it a valid scene, or even related to the subject, no, but it was still one of the better clips!!!

 

Sarah looked so great in her interviews!  And her commentary was better than anyone else in my opinion.  They should have just let her narrate the special.  And luckily for us she told the secret of the Gauntlets true power!  The Gauntlet can both Suck and Blow!!!  That's real talent ladies and Gentlemen. 

 

Couples bad!  Just to let you know if you come on to a RW/RR Challenge please don't bring your mate…you will destroy your team.  Did we not learn this on Battle of the Seasons when Holly and Chadwick's unholy marriage nearly destroyed them all?  There was a friggin hurricane.  What was Irulan and Alton thinking?  And Trishelle comments that sometimes people use relationships to manipulate a game.  Hmmm…I wonder if that might be why she hooked up with Mike the self-proclaimed team captain? 

 

 

Segment two arrives and I'm hoping to get a little Inferno action, and honestly I was hoping to see more Shane!!! (He is on the show you know!) 

 

But instead we launch head first into Katie and Veronica.  Didn't they dedicate enough time to them already?  Oh well…here we go again.  Veronica: "Blah blah blah, she won't even apologize on camera."  CUT TO Katie apologizing on screen.  Go figure!  Perhaps this will make it all better.  Personally if someone does something to me I don't need a film crew to heal my wounds, but then again I'm not Veronica either…THANK YOU HIGHER POWERS.

 

Yeah so this whole segment is like a bad boxing event, or episode of Celebrity Death Match.  The second fight was Coral and Trishelle.  The verdict is still out on the winner here.  Trishelle clearly took Mike from her (who knew Coral had Mike???).  Coral clearly outlasted her in the show.  But perhaps if Trishelle would have used all those secrets she got from Katie…she would have lasted longer.  Damn her conscience. 

 

Mike vs. Trishelle was the next fight.  And clearly Trishelle came out on top here (please don't go there).  She not only wanted to flirt with her exes, she also hooked up with Adam.  And everyone knows Adam and Mike hate each other (except for me).  There's no end to her evil ways. 

 

 Coral also had a match with a Spider.  Trishelle tells us that Coral was clearly faking. I really need to ask Coral how she suppresses her ability to breathe while faking a shaking fit!  That's some raw shit! 

 

Sarah finally tells us what happened.  Coral got spider bit while taking a pee!  Don't pee in the woods (or on the electric fence).  It's sad that Sarah went to see her in the hospital, but no one in her team did!

 

Segment three we finally get to see some Inferno scenes, and to my surprise it did have some juicy tidbits.  There are lots of fights ahead on the new challenge.  Including a fight between…hold your breath yall won't believe this.  Katie and Veronica!!!  They actually have a fight.  Okay, yeah who didn't see that coming (not to mention the commercials they kept showing of them trying to kill each other).

 

Veronica admits to liking drama, as if we haven't already figured it out. I mean if she was a nice peace loving person, then why would she have been branded a festering pool of negativity…yeah that doesn't happen to nice people usually.

 

Lots of people love Julie.  Julie will most certainly have a fan club at the Inferno challenge right?  Not exactly, Coral even wears a "Melissa will Kill You" shirt.   I'll just let you know that people don't like her, especially Melissa and Coral.  You have to give props to Melissa though; she's on the special when she's not on either challenge!  Oh, and I want to see Trishelle's INFERNHO shirt. 

 

Okay, CT is hot.  We are educated on the fact!  I'm glad because I wasn't sure.  Leah even watched the boy shower…which lead me to wonder did she watch him shower while she was hooking up with Darrell?

 

That's right Darrell and Leah hook up.  I don't really know how this happened, but it is interesting.

 

Mike and Kendal hook up, and Kendal was dating Blair, and Blair was Mikes Friend, and apparently Blair dated Trishelle, of course by date I'm sure Coral means they *ucked (because apparently Trishelle can't function in relationships).  But none the less, it's plain to see that there's a lot of nasty germ (or a word that rhymes with) swapping going on.

 

Shane apparently was a hot ticket at Inferno.  All the girls wanted to get with him.  Not a surprise really, but sadly Shane doesn't like to have sex with women.  Doh!  But apparently he has no problem making out with everyone on the show.  I am sad to say those weren't the Shane clips I had hoped for.  I almost wonder if he doesn't just make out with girls this time to make sure to get screen time???  Surely not…a Road Ruler doing something just for attention...wacky thoughts. 

 

We end the show with lots of action shots of the missions!  And we see David Naked.  Actually they show David Naked at least 3 times during the show.  I think they were hypnotizing the audience with his nakedness…either that or they were trying to give his mom a heart attack?  Sweet Mysteries of life…

 

And with that I leave with Shane's only quote on the show.

 

"MTV Sucks!"