If I Were You

Author's Note:  This story is loosely based on the song that you'll find at the bottom of the page.  All rights to the song are reserved to the publishers affiliated with the songwriters, as well as the record label the artist records with.

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Josh and Lance sat alone on the beach, both of them staring out at the beginnings of sunset.  Josh wrapped his arms around his legs, his chin resting lightly against his knees as he breathed the damp salty air, closing his eyes momentarily as he thought about the events that had just transpired.

Lance had called earlier that day, wanting Josh to go to the local carnival with him.  "Come on, it'll be fun," he had said, his normally deep voice higher pitched due to his eagerness.  Josh reluctantly agreed, unable to protest against Lance's obvious happiness.

They had a great time, spending way too much money on tickets for the rides, and gorging themselves on hot dogs and cotton candy.  Their stomachs full, they had decided to walk around for awhile, unwilling to go on any of the spinning "thrill rides" until their stomachs had settled.

"Ooh, a little boat ride," Lance had exclaimed.  "That's calm enough, and I'm tired of walking.  Let's go there."

They gave the attendant their tickets, climbing into the small two-seated contraption.  The boat wound along the track, soft music playing in the dark corridor.  Suddenly the boat stopped, red lights casting an eerie glow around them.

"This can't be good," Josh said, chuckling softly.  He looked at Lance, who gazed back at him through heavy-lidded eyes, before leaning in softly, brushing Josh's lips with the gentlest of kisses.

The boat started moving again, and Josh and Lance broke apart, Josh's eyes wide with confusion and uncertainty.  After that, they left the carnival, Josh driving to a secluded beach he had discovered long ago.  "I think we need to talk," he said to Lance, who just nodded.

But neither of them had spoken a word.  From the minute they sat down along the water's edge, they were seemingly lost in their own worlds, transfixed on the waves and the small crabs that scurried along the sand.

"I'm sorry."  The words, merely a whisper against the slight breeze, caused Josh to glance over to Lance, who was still staring straight ahead.

"There's no reason to be sorry, Lance," Josh replied.  "I've been wanting something like that to happen for ages."

"You have?"  Now Lance looked over, his pale green eyes questioning.  "Why didn't you ever say anything?"

Josh chuckled.  "I didn't know if you felt the same, or if you'd get mad at me if you knew how I felt."

"I could never be mad at you," Lance said softly.  There was a brief pause, before he continued.  "So what happens now?"

"That's a good question," Josh answered.  "Where do you want this to go?"

"Well, I don't want to act like it never happened, because frankly, that was the best kiss I've ever had," Lance told him.  "But I don't want...whatever this is...to cause problems within the group, or with the whole image we have professionally.  We have several options, but I'm scared to choose one over any other."

"I definitely understand what you're saying, I've been running all those questions and doubts through my mind too.  I want to know what this is, Lance.  I want to see where this could go.  I don't see why we can't give it a shot, we just need to be careful for now."

Lance was silent, and Josh silently prayed that it wasn't a bad sign.  "Just think about it, Lance.  We're at the top of our game, our careers are going better than we ever dreamed.  But what are we missing?"

"Someone to share it with," Lance replied quietly.  "Someone to love."

"What is your heart telling you right now, about all this?" Josh pushed gently.

Lance closed his eyes, tears glistening at the corners.  "That there's a chance to find love, and he's right next to me."

Josh scooted closer, wrapping his arms around the younger man.  He kissed Lance's cheeks gently, wiping the teary trails with his thumbs.  "I can't swear that everything is going to be sunshine and roses.  You're right when you said that it could fare badly for the group, and there's always the chance that the other guys won't completely accept it.  But I can promise you that I'm always going to be here, and that I'll do everything in my power to make you happy."

Lance sniffled, resting his head on Josh's shoulder.  "Not to sound like a child here, but I'm scared."

"So am I, but we owe ourselves this chance," Josh answered.  "We deserve the right to fall in love and be happy, and if it's together, more power to us, you know?"

"Is it really that easy?  Just like that, we're in love, take it or leave it?"

"That's how I feel," Josh said softly.  "I've fought it forever, but the minute you kissed me in that tunnel, I couldn't anymore.  I am hopelessly in love with you, James Lance Bass, and if I had it my way, right now you'd be hopelessly in love with me."

Lance smiled, placing a small kiss along Josh's jawline.  "Then your way it is," he whispered.  "Because I'm in love with you too."

**********
If I Were You
Performed by: Collin Raye

You wanna know where we go from here
So many roads, but none that seem clear
Is what we have enough to last a whole life through?
Who knows, baby who knows

So you're asking me what do we do
'Cause time moves so fast, and the chances seem so few
Is it too much to think that we can have it all?
Who knows, we may never know

But if I were you, I'd promise to
Live life for all it's worth
Take all that you've been given
And leave your mark upon this earth
Trust your heart to show you
Everything you'll ever need
And if I were you, I'd fall in love with me

So hold me close, I'll kiss away your fears
I won't promise the moon, but I promise to be here
And what if together it gets better everyday?
Who knows, baby who knows

But if I were you, I'd promise to
Live life for all it's worth
Take all that you've been given
And leave your mark upon this earth
Trust your heart to show you
Everything you'll ever need
And if I were you, I'd fall in love with me (2x)

If I were you, I'd fall in love with me
 

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