I sigh in annoyance as I turn in bed for probably the umpteenth time. I look at the clock beside my bed; it is almost two in the morning yet sleep still eludes me. Something is bothering me, but I can't place my finger on what or why. Or maybe it's because I don't want to accept the real reason of my unease; Hiei is planning to return to Makai--to Mokuro--for good.

'Great,' I think irritably. 'Just great! After another hard day all I need right now is another sleepless night thinking about /him/ and wishing for the impossible.' After a couple more hours of restless tossing and turning, I decide to go for a walk. I badly need to some peace of mind and maybe the silence and tranquility outside might just be the key.

The early morning air still feels crisp even though it is already halfway through spring. I shiver slightly as a walk through the wide grounds behind our home, casually making my way towards the large cherry tree at the center of the eastern garden.

I breathe in deeply as I glance up. The sky is clear with the waning crescent moon shedding its soft light and one could see the billions of stars glittering against the dark background of the heavens. I sigh.

"What're you doing out here all alone?" asks a voice from the shadows behind me. I jump in surprise and turn to face the newcomer.

"Who's there?" I demand, tensing up and raising my youki just in case the intruder was an enemy. Then I relax and sigh in relief as I recognize the face that emerges from the shadows, a face that has become so very familiar and precious to me.

"Hn. Did I startle you, kitsune?" Hiei says as his form of apologizing, flashing one of his rare smiles, eyes twinkling with amusement.

"Nah," I lie, smirking, as I turn and look up the sky again.

He moves to stand beside me and looks up at me. "So, what /are/ you doing out here all alone?" he repeats after a moment.

I look down at him and give him a small smile before turning away again. "Hoshi." I whisper. "The stars."

"The stars?" He asks, frowning, a confused expression appearing on his elfin face.

"Hai, the stars." I reply. "They're...relaxing. I like watching the stars, twinkling up there like the sunlight reflecting off water ripples or off dew on plants at dawn." Or like your eyes whenever you laugh or smile at me, I nearly say aloud.

"Stop being so damn poetic; it's disgusting." he says. He then sits on the grass and draws his knees up to his chest; he locks his arms around them as he, too, looks up. "The stars really are beautiful, ne?" he suddenly murmurs after a while.

"Sou." I agree. 'But not as beautiful as you.' I mentally whisper. A long moment of silence passes between us as we both gaze at the stars. Then, "And what are YOU doing out here at this hour?"

He tears his eyes off the sky and looks down, not meeting my eyes. "Can't sleep." He answers simply, shrugging his shoulders, his expression sullen. Suddenly he looks up at me, a mischievous look on his face. "And I bet you couldn't either."

"Yeah." I confirm, a smile playing on my own lips as well. 'Ah, so this was why...I was being called.'

I sit on the grass next to him as we both continue our stargazing. After some time, Hiei suddenly points to a certain patch of the sky. "Oh, look! A shooting star!" His voice held a tinge of surprise and delight-just like a child...innocent.

Another smile tugs at my lips as I watch his somewhat delighted expression; whether it's obvious or not, I have to admit that I smile more often whenever he's around. I look at the sky.

"They say, that if you make a wish on a shooting star, it would come true."

"I know that." He says, frowning at me. "But they're just from stupid ningen tales; stars cannot make your dreams come true...you have to make it come true."

I merely smile back at him; he may not know it but I find his frown cute. When he frowns, his lips almost form in a pout emphasizing his sensuous mouth. "Hai, but humans have to believe in things to give them some kind of hope; besides, it's fun to try making a wish on a falling star."

"Hn. It's stupid." He says. Nevertheless he turns back to the shooting star, closes his eyes and makes a wish.

I give a soft sigh as I watch him, making a silent wish of my own to freeze this moment, that I may always be this close to the person I love. But I know that kind of wish is impossible for even a god to make into reality-Hiei will leave and I can't stop him from going.

I look at the star as it nears the horizon, making a different wish...a wish that is more like a promise.

After a while the shooting star is gone and he opens his eyes.

"What did you wish for?" I inquire.

He stares at me for a moment and grins at me. "It's...a...secret." he answers playfully.

I blink.

"Baka, according to your human lore if I told you then my wish won't come true." He explains.

"Sou ka?" I am smiling again.

"Yeah, so I'm not gonna tell you." He gives me another small grin.

I gently shake my head, giving a small huff of amusement.

"And how `bout you?"

I blink once more in confusion at his sudden question. "Nanda?"

He frowns and sighs in exasperation. "I mean what did you wish for."

"Oh, that." I chuckle. He pouts again.

I lie on the ground; the grass feels cool and soft on my back. I smile at him as I cradle my head on my hands.

"Well?" he repeats impatiently.

"Hi...mi...tsu."

"What?!" he cries.

I laugh. "Oi, you wouldn't tell yours, so why would I tell mine?"

"B-but that's different!" he sputters.

"Sou ka?"

"Sou desu." he insists.

"But don't you think that's unfair, ne?" I tease--I often tease him when I find him 'cute' or when I just wanted to say what I really feel but knowing I can't.

He sulks. "Fine." he says as he stands up.

'Oh no, I did it again. You complete idiot!' I mentally kick myself, repeatedly, as I realize that he is about to leave me, again. Memories quickly flash through my head, memories of the times when he would go away after a fight or after I had teased, not really knowing, not really realizing the underlying reason why I was teasing him.

My mind races; I have to do something-I don't want him to leave now. To be completely honest, I don't want him to leave, ever.

"Matte!" I call out, grasping his hand before he could walk away. "Matte, Hi-Hiei." I stutter.

"What now, Kurama?" he asks, disturbed. He didn't even turn to look at me.

"I'm sorry," I apologize. "I'm really, really sorry. I didn't mean to insult you. Please forgive me." Then, softly, "Please don't go."

Hiei remains silent and motionless. I hang my head as I let my hand fall back by my side, letting go of his hand. I turn away.

"G-gomen nasai. I shouldn't-I shouldn't have bothered you anymore." I whisper. I my chest hurts as I try to swallow a sob that threatens to escape. "Don't worry, I won't bother you...anymore." My voice cracks at the last word.

There is no reply. I clench my fists as the tears begin to well up in my eyes.

"I'm sorry." I repeated, voice quivering slightly. "I'm so sorry."

Still there was no response. I don't have look behind me anymore see if he is still there-I know he has left already.

I don't blame him for leaving me, after all it is my fault...I made him mad at me again. I'm too scared to tell him my true feelings that I tend to do stupid things, pushing him further away from me.

I give a shuddering sigh as I lift my head up to the heavens. The stars look blurry as hot tears begin to flow down my cheeks. I close my eyes but the tears wouldn't stop flowing. I choke on a sob, my shoulders shaking.

"Please take care of yourself, Hiei." I whisper hoarsely, although I know no one else would hear it but me.

A biting wind begins to blow and I shudder. I wrap my arms tightly about me as the coldness begins to seep into me. I stand there for a few more moments before deciding to walk back.

Hiei is gone now and I'm not even able to say good-bye properly; all I did was make him angry with me. Now I wish that I could turn back time, but I know wishing will bring me nothing-only wishes of innocent children and people come true. I give a doleful smile...at least, Hiei's wish would come true. But still...

'Gods, please,' I silently pray before turning back home. 'Please help me be able to protect Hiei at all times, to keep him safe and happy...even if it takes my life.'

But when I turn, I still find Hiei standing there behind me. He looks straight into my eyes, his ruby ones burning into my own ivy ones, looking strangely at me. "Kurama," he begins to say, slowly walking back towards me. "Don't you ever let me see you cry...Don't you ever /dare/ let me see you cry because of me." He comes so close to me that there is barely a breath space between our bodies; I could feel the heat radiating from him slowly driving away the chill that only a while ago was trying to envelop me.

I bite my lower lip, unable to control the sudden surge of emotions, unable to find the proper words to say in this moment. "Hiei...I'm so sor-"

"Shut up, Kurama." Hiei says; I clamp my mouth shut. He smiles his rarest smile, the kind of smile I've only see him give to Yukina; his arms reaches out and envelops me in a tight embrace, our clothing the only barrier between our bodies, our hearts beating as one. "Don't say anything, Kurama." he murmurs. "I already know."

"Hiei...arigatou." I whisper, my voice choked-up with emotion. My arms are also twined around his slight frame, my tear-stained face buried in his spiky black hair as I find the perfect words to say. "Ai shiteru, Hiei."

I could feel him smile; he slowly raises his head. "Ai shiteru, Kurama." he says before meeting my quivering lips for a deep kiss.

My heart soars, my beloved and I are one now and I would treasure this moment forever.

end