Victorian Wedding Traditons and Superstitions
This is kind of a fun page including Early American and Victorian wedding traditions. More Victorian of course. I thought you would find many of these interesting. Some traditions have changed dramatically, but some have stayed the same. If you know of any traditions that I haven't added here, please email me and I'll be glad to add it. This is a hard subject to research. Here's what I've found so far...
Victorian Wedding Traditons...

The bride and the wedding party always walk to the church leading the procession with a small girl tossing blossoms along the road so the bride's path through life will always be happy and laden with flowers.
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The Bride used to sew a good luck charm such as a silver horse-shoe worn by Brittish brides to the hem of her wedding gown.
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If an English Bride passed a chimney sweep on her way to the church and he stopped to kiss her, it was considered good luck. Sometimes chimeny sweeps were invited to the wedding for good luck. This practice is still sometimes practiced today.
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An Early American custom was for the Bride to pin a small pouch to her wedding petticoat. It contained a small piece of bread, a strip of cloth, a small piece of wood and a single dollar bill. This ensured enough food, clothes, shelter and money for the couple's future.
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In Shivare friends would gather to bang pots and pans and shoot guns into the air to disturb the newly wed couple on their wedding night.
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In medieval times, it was a custom for friends, relatives and guests to accompany the newly wed couple to the marriage bed. As time went on, this became too rowdy to the point that some guests were all too eager to help the Bride out of her wedding gown. Eventually this custom was changed so that the garter was quickly removed and thrown to the mob as a distraction. Now the garter is taken off in modesty at the wedding reception and thrown to the single men. The belief now is that the man who catches it will be next to be married.
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It was a custom for the English Bridesmaids to dress in a similar way to the bride to act as decoys to confuse evil spirits and protect the Bride.
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Another old English custom was to place a ring in the wedding cake. The guest who found the ring would be ensured of happines for the next year.
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In Yorkshire, a plate holding wedding cake was thrown out the window as the Bride returened to her parental home after the wedding. If the plate broke, she would enjoy a happy future with her husband. If the plate did not break, her future would be grim.
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Victorian Wedding Superstitions

Surnames...
It was considered unlucky for a lady to marry a man whose surname began with the same letter as hers. The sentiment was surmised in the following rhyme:
To change the name and not the letter,
Is to change from the worst and not better.
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In England, the Bride was was to practice writing her married name before the wedding. This was thought to bring bad luck by tempting fate. She was also not to use her married name before the wedding.
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The Proposal...
In the past when the proposal was a more formal procedure. The prospective Groom sent his friends or members of his family to represent his interests to the prospective Bride and her family. If they saw a blind man, a monk or a pregnant woman on their journey, it was thought that the marriage would be doomed if they continued on their journey. These sights were considered bad omens.
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Buying the engagement ring and the wedding rings at the same time was thought to bring bad luck. Wearing the wedding ring before the ceremony was also bad luck.
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Seeing an open grave, a pig, a lizard, a monk, a nun, or hearing a cockerel crow after dawn were thought to be bad omens. They were associated with poverty and chastity. They were also thought to signal a dependence on charity by newlyweds.
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Old Suitability Rules
Those with grewy, blue, black or hazel eyes should not marry those of same color.
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Those with thin, wiry, cold blooded prominent features should marry those with round features, warm hearts and emotional types.
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Those with bright red hair and a florid complexion have an excitable temperment and should marry those with jet black hair or a brunette.
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The very fine haired, soft and delicate should not marry those like themselves.
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The curly haired should marry those with straight hair.
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The extremely irritable and nervous person should marry the sympathetic, slow and quiet type.
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The quick-motioned, rapid speaking person should marry the calm and deliberate type.
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The warmly implusive should marry the stoical.
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Those who don't fit a specific catergory (not short nor tall, not burnette nor blonde) who are more of an average type may marry those who are similar to themselves.
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Naming the Day

The wedding itself and the events leading up to the ceremony are ancient traditions still evident in Victorian customs. One of the first to unfluence a young girl is choosing the month and day for her wedding. June has always been the most popular month. It is named Juno after the Roman goddess of marriage. She would bring prosperity and happiness to all who married in this month. If a bride married in June, her first born was likely to be born in the Spring giving enough time to rest before the fall harvest.


In the Southern United States it wasfavorable to be married in April because it was Spring, the weather was warmer and the brides favorite flowers such as Jasmine and Camellia were more likely to be in bloom.

Brides were also superstitious about the day of week they were to be married:
Marry on Monday for health,
Tuesday for wealth,
Wednesday the best day of all,
Thursday for crosses,
Friday for losses,
Saturday no luck at all
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The Sabbath, Sunday, was out of the question...




The Wedding Ensemble and Brides Fashions

After the bride chose her wedding day, she could concentrate on planning her trousseau. The most important item of her troussea was of course her wedding gown.


Brides have not always worn white as a traditional color. In the 16th and 17th centuries, girls who married in their teens wore pale green as a sign of fertility. Ladies who married in their 20's wore brown and older women wore black. From the early Saxon times to the 18th century, only poorer brides wore white. This was  a public statement that she brough nothing with her to the marriage. Some brides simply wore their Sunday best. The color of the gown was thought to influence the couples future.
Marry in white chosen right,
Marry in blue, love will be true,
Marry in yellow, you're ashamed of your fellow,
Marry in red, wish yourself dead,
Marry in black, wish yourself back,
Marry in grey, travel far away,
Marry in pink, of you he'll always think,
Marry in green, ashamed to be seen.


When Queen Victoria wed Albert in 1840, she wore white and white has remained the traditional color for wedding gowns and bouquets since.


The early Victorian wedding dress had a fit bodice, small waist, and full skirt. It was made of organdy, tulle, lace, guaze, silk, linen or cashmere. The reasonable cost of a wedding gown in 1850 was $500 with a $125 veil. By 1861, more elaborate gowns could cost as much as $1500!

Formal weddings in the Victorian period were all white, including the bridesmaid's dresses. The bride's accessories included; short white kids gloves, a handkerchief embroidered with her maiden name initials, silk stockings and flat shoes decorated with ribbons or bows.

The mid Victorian brides wore wedding gowns fashioned by Worth in Paris. A gown made by Worth was a status symbol. If a bride to be couldn't afford an original, someone would copy it for them. Full court trains were now the style as were long veils, and bustles.

The late Victorian brides had large sleeves and no bustle. If the wedding was to be held in a church, the bride must have a train and her veil was the same length as the train. The white kid gloves were now long and had a slit in one finger so the ring could be slipped on without removing the glove. The shoes were now made of satin or brocade and the heels were one inch high.

The widow who remarried in the early to mid-Victorian times did not wear white, had no bridesmaids, no veil and no orange blossoms. She wore a pearl or lavender satin gown trimmed in ostrich feathers. As time went on, she was allowed attendant, but no veil or orange blossoms. She could also wear a shade or two away from white such as rose, salmon, ivory or violet.


The Groom's Attire

The grooms were also concerned with the fashions on their wedding day. In the early Victorian era, the bride~groom wore a jacket of blue, mulberry or claret with a flower in his lapel. By 1865, men't jackets were tailored with a special hole for the flower. The waistcoat was white and his trousers were lavender moleskin. Black was not worn then. The best man and grooms~men wore jackets also but not as elaborately colored as the groom's.

Mid~Victorian days jackets were seldom worn. The morning coat became preferrable because of it's crisper appearance. Some groom's still wore the jackets and by this time they were wearing them with a black vest, dark grey trousers and lavender gloves with black stitching.

No gloves were worn by 1885 by the groom but in 1886 they were required once again. Now men wore pearl colored gloves with black stitching. By 1889 the jacket was once again in style along with a double breasted light colored waistcoat, a dark tie, grey stripped cashmere trousers with patent leather button boots. A black top hat was also necessary.

By the end of the Victorian Age, boutonniers were large and made of lilies or gardenias. If the wedding was in the evening, full dress tailcoats, white gloves and a white waistcoat was required. The father of the bride dressed like the groom and his attendants.


Attendants, Family and the Children

The bridesmaids gowns had to be practical and beautiful. Sometimes the bride would purchase the bridesmaids dresses. The bridesmaids had their head covered with short white veils that fell just below the hip. Home weddings did not require a veil as did church weddings. When a veil was not worn, headpieces of flowers and ribbons were worn instead.

Mothers and female guests wore similar fashions to the bride but the differnce was subtle. All women had to wear bonnets if it was a church wedding, but it was not required for home weddings. In the late Victorian era, black was a common suggested color for the mother of the bride. Queen Victoria always wore black when invited to a wedding as she was the "mother" symbol of England.

The English bride pinned "favors" of white ribbon, flowers, lace and silver leaves on the ushers' shoudlers. In the early Victorian days, the bridesmaids also made favors and pinned them on the sleeves and shoulders of the guests as they left the ceremony. Later in the era, even the servants and horses wore flowers. The bride would make the servant's favors by hand.
And Finally...The Ceremony

The ceremony either took place at home or in a church. In the 1850's weddings were almost always in the church the bride was attending. After the ceremony, the couple signed their name in the parish register with the bride signing her maiden name. The church was decorated with flowers. The flowers became more elaborate with each decade.

In England, a country bride and her wedding party often walked to the church on a carpet of blossoms to assure a happy path through life. For the wealthy, a grey horse pulling the wedding carriage was considered good luck. Church bells sounded as the couple entered the church for a dual purpose: one was to make the public aware of the ceremony and two was to scare away any evil spirit that may be lurking nearby.

The wedding band was usually a solid gold band with the initials of the couple and the wedding date engraved on the inside of the band. There were not many double ring ceremonies in those days. It was considered good luck to drop the ring during the ceremony to shake out all evil spirits.

The bride and groom walked out looking straight ahead after the ceremony. It was considered rude to acknowledge friends and other guests. The bride's family was the first to leave the church. The best man left last after he paid the clergyman for his services.


The Reception

Most wedding ceremonies in those days took place in the early morning hours, therefore the reception was traditonally a breakfast at the bride's home. It was there that the guests were received and congratulations offered to the couple.

The parents of the bride congratulated the couple first then stood nearby. The maid of honor was always near the bride to assist her. The bridesmaids stood to the right and left of the couple. Tradition and etiquette required that the guest address the bride first unless they only knew the groom, then they addressed the groom first and was then introduced to the bride.

Guests were served standing while the wedding party was seated. There was no entertainment at the reception unless it was a formal affair then there was dancing.

Usually three wedding cakes were made. One was for the guests and two were for the bride and groom. Traditionally the cake was a dark fruitcake with white frosting and decorated with orange blossoms. The bride and groom's cake was not decorated. The brides cake  was white and the grooms cake was dark. The groom's cake was divided among the attendants. The bride's cake was to be saved for the couple's 25th wedding anniversary.
The Honeymoon

The couple usually left for the honeymoon right after the wedding breakfast. If the couple was changing into traveling clothes, they went and did that as soon as the cake was served. The bridesmaids would help the bride and then the bride would give each girl a flower from her bouquet. Only family members and close friends were present to see the couple off. As the couple drove off in a carriage pulled by white horese, the remaining guests threw satin slippers and rice after the couple. If the left slipper landed in the carriage, it was considered good luck.

The best man went to the train or boat with the couple to look after their luggage. It was considered bad taste to ask the couple where they were going. Only the best man knew and it was traditional not to tell.

On return of the honeymoon, one final custom was required; the ago old customs of carrying the bride over the threshold of their new house. This was so the bride would not stumble which would bring bad luck.
I hope you had as much fun reading this page as I did in writing and researching it. Not too much has changed in the way of wedding traditions. Weddings today are just as elaborate and important as they were in the yesteryears. We do much of the same traditions today that the Victorians did, only we might not do it for the same reasons...
Thank you Dawn
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