Brawls
Well, two weeks ago I once again failed to end the life of the one most refer to as Brent.  The match was more brutal than the first one though.  Punches were thrown, kicks flew, and I rammed Brent's head into the cement floor. But once again I ran out of breath faster than whorely can suck a cock so I wasn't able to accomplish my mission.  Afterwords me and Brent had a conversation in which we agreed that the matches seemed to get more brutal every time. So we've decided that a rematch will take place.  So in the near future, we can hopefully look foward to Jake vs. Brent III. Being this will be the third time we fight, it will probably be the best ever because everyone knows that the 3rd occurance of anything is the best.  Just look at Wreslemania III and Rocky III.
Today, (Feb 14th), I have an important announcement to make.  Joel Bertram, an SJM, has been running his mouth quite a bit lately, and today he finally went over the edge and has issued to me a challenge for the next session of church(Feb 23rd).  Mr. Bertram has challenged me to a brawl. I would like to be the first to wish Joel happiness in the afterlife .
I was informed by a very credible source (Brent) that he will be having a brawl with Danny Ricke (who????) sometime in the near future.  It won't be this friday though because Brent will be absent from that church.
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