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"The Fly Who Came In From the Cold"
Wham! Another thump. I go running down the hall wiping my hands on my shirttail. I run into the bedroom and I see them. Donovan on the dresser, Boots on the bed, Buster and Kenya on the rug, and Tally on the dusty Nordictrack.
And they're all looking up at the ceiling. Eyes riveted. I look up. I don't see anything. I look back down and their heads are still pointed straight up. Is this one of their jokes, I ask myself. Did they all take a bet on how long it would take mom to follow their glance? I look up again. I see it.
A fly. On the ceiling. The radar beacons have all homed in on the intruder. They've got Tone.
Kenya is yapping with excitement. She rushes over to the wall, stands up on her hind legs and starts pawing. "Get down here. Get down here this instant. I offer you amnesty if you surrender". The fly doesn't move. He obviously has no idea The Queen is addressing him. She prances around in her impatience. She's not used to being ignored. Seven males jump at her every wish. And if they don't, she smacks them. The fly is out of reach. I swear he is thumbing his little nose at us mortals down here on earth. I decide there is no immediate danger and go back to the kitchen where I find Sammy standing in the Tupperware from last night's dinner slurping water from the faucet.
I hear another thump, followed by a crash and a rush of skid marks on the hardwood floor. A thundering herd of paws comes crashing down the hall. Someone hits a wall. I look into the living room and they are all rushing in, heads up, and bumping into everything in sight. Tally runs right over Boots, who smacks him a good one up the side of his head. Kenya butts in front of Buster, who doesn't see her in his fixation on the runaway fly and runs directly into her causing her to lose her balance. They both end up in the fireplace. I can see the fly buzzing about. I swear he's laughing. Donovan jumps up on the dining room table and knocks over a crystal candlestick. OK, now I have to get involved. We could have serious collateral damage here while the Flying Felines attempt to take out the intruder. I get the broom.
I'm attempting to corral it into the kitchen where I can open the back door. Kenya addresses her troops. "Gentlemen, it's up to you. This Flyboy had invaded domestic territory. GET HIM!" The fly swoops down past Donovan who takes a swipe and falls off the table. Its amazing how they can crash, bump, collide and fall into each and yet never take their eyes off a moving target. I guess that's what they train for. They day when they must bring all their focus and discipline to defeat the enemy.
So now we have 8 cats and a stupid human crashing through the house chasing The Fly. Now he's in the service porch. He buzzes by on a low flyby and drops down behind the washing machine. 6 cats vie for a landing site on top of the dryer and stare down behind the control panel. It looks like an aircraft carrier. My broom is in my hand. We're ready. We wait.
And we wait. Donovan leaves his post and goes for food. Buster starts playing with Gizmo's tail. Boots gets bored and nods off. The broom is getting heavy, and my attention wanders. And in that unguarded moment, The Fly makes his move. Completing a stunning vertical launch, he buzzes straight up and over our heads. He makes a right hand turn, Swirling down past our frustrated ears he swoops down for another flyby. Right past Zeke at the food bowl.
His paw flashes. We catch our breaths. The Fly is no more.
We crowd around, heads bowed in silence. Honoring a noble pilot. And then Tally says "Does this count as a real mission, or are we still in training?"
4/99
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I was loading the dishwasher when I heard it. Thump. I stopped and listened. Thumping in our household is not an uncommon sound. I resumed my chores and then I heard the crash. What the heck? I pull my hands out from under the running water and run into the dining room. I'm just in time to see a black fluffy tail disappear down the hall.
