I Need You Tonight
Part VI

"Can we take a break please?" Nick asked, speaking into the microphone. "I’ve sung my voice dry!" Their manager agreed to let them take a break, but only a twenty-minute break.

We were in the recording studio and it was the most amazing thing. The guys sang their stuff in a room with only microphones that had a piece in front of them that looked like a metal window screen. While the guys sang, the song producer and whoever else, me included, watched from a soundproof room straight across. We watched them through a window and listened to them on the speaker. It was an amazing experience that I will never forget.

"Hey, Dani!" Nick called when both of us stepped out of the room at the same time.

"Hey, Nick! You sounded great!" The rest of the guys emerged from the recording room. "All of you sounded great!" The guys were all smiles. They had been recording for almost two months now and they never tired of the experience. I didn’t blame them. It was their dream come true.

"Isn’t it exciting?!" AJ rushed at me and picked me up, twirling me around in the air. When he set me back down on the ground, I could barely stand up because I was laughing so hard.

"Yeah, it is pretty exciting!" I said. We went to the break room where the walls were lined with soda machines and vending machines. We sat around drinking and talking excitedly about the album.

I felt a hand tug at my elbow, making me almost loose control of my Dr. Pepper can.

"Dani," I recognized Nick’s whisper. "Will you come with me? We need to talk." I turned and when I saw the look in Nick’s eyes, I knew it was serious.

"Okay." I followed Nick out of the room, making sure that no one saw us slip out. He took me into a deserted room in the back of the building that had only a chair with three legs occupying it. I stopped in the middle of the room and turned to Nick.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Well, remember when you asked me about your ‘dream/vision’ that you had that night that you sleepwalked into my bed?" I nodded, not knowing where he was going with things. "Well, I had a weird dream like that too, except I knew I wasn’t dreaming and I knew I wasn’t awake. I dreamed the same scenario that you did except mine went further. I saw him kissing you and it was weird but I was filled with hate and jealousy. Then I saw AJ do something that was bad, whether or not I was dreaming or it was reality." He paused, closing his eyes as if to remember better.

"Nick, what is it?" I touched his arm gently.

He opened his eyes. They held fear now. "Well, he picked you up and swung you around just like he did when he came out of the recording studio," He licked his lips nervously. "Then he slammed your body into a pole and dropped you to the ground. He started beating you and ended up beating you to death." Neither of us said a word for a while, just stood there staring at each other.

"So, what does this all mean?" I asked, breaking the silence. "Each of us has had a dream about AJ hurting me, but in reality he’s has never hurt me." I was so confused.

"I don’t know. Maybe your subconscious is trying to tell you that he’s not good for you or that he might do that in the future. I have no idea. Maybe he won’t hurt you physically but emotionally." Nick ran a trembling hand through his hair. "It scared the life out of me when I saw him rush at you and pick you up and twirl you around. I had that dream about a week ago, but that just sparked my memory."

I sat there silent, not knowing what to say. Maybe Nick was right. Maybe AJ would hurt me emotionally sometime in the future. And maybe he was right when he suggested that he might not be good for me. I had no idea what any of this meant but ever since my sleepwalking incident with Nick I’ve had many dreams where AJ hurt me.

"All I know, Dani, is that it would kill me if he ever hurt you. I don’t want you to get hurt." His look was so sincere that I wrapped him in a tight hug.

"Just promise me, Nick, that if he ever does hurt me you’ll be there for me." I squeezed my eyes shut and held him tighter.

"I promise." We let go of each other and stood there, looking at each other for a while. Finally Nick said, "Well, I better get back before the break ends." We walked back to the room where the guys were and found them gone. Figuring that they had already gone back to the recording studio, Nick and I walked back to the room.

"Wish me luck!" Nick said. "My song is next!" I wished him luck and went back to the producing room. I listened to Nick sing his song, watched him pour his soul into the music and his singing. But I guess he could relate.

"If you ever feel, like no one cares, when you try your best, but you get nowhere, don’t give in, cause good times will come again." Nick closed his eyes as he sang, putting all of his heart and emotion into his singing. "When they criticize, every move you make, and you’ve had as much as your gonna take don’t you worry, soon enough things will change." Brian sang a bridge from the verse into the chorus and then the rest of the guys joined in for the chorus.

Nick took a breath and continued singing. "If you just can’t find, someone to trust, when you give your heart, but you don’t get much, don’t you worry, the time is gonna come. Oohh!" Then AJ sang one part of the bridge, Brian singing the other, and then it went back into the chorus again. These guys sounded great! Like true professionals! But it was their next song that really blew me away. As the guys sang, I followed along with the typed page of lyrics that they had given me. It looked like this:

We’ve Got It Goin’ On

Everybody groove to the music
Everybody jam

We’ve been waiting so long
Just can’t hold it back no more
Creepin’ up and down now
It’s time for me to let it go

If you really wanna see
What we can do for you
Send the crazy wildin’ static
Sing it

Chorus: Jam on ‘cause Backstreet’s got it
Come on now everybody
We’ve got it goin’ on for years (2x)

We’ve got it goin’ on for years (2x)

Well I’m creepin’ up on your left
Straightup funky when I get with you
I get ruthless when I get wet
Keep the party packed in my corner
Tough like granite to keep the crowd hype
Get up on this just to get it right
What you want is what your gonna get
Backstreet’s got the special effects, uh

After AJ’s "rap" part, I looked at the guys singing. From the past weeks that I had spent watching and listening to them, I could tell that I was going to love the new CD. I watched each guy sing the last half of the song.

"If you really wanna see, what we can do for you, send the crazy wildin’ static. Sing it!" AJ really got into the music as he sang, moving his arms with the beat and adding in gestures here and there.

"Jam on ‘cause Backstreet’s got it. Come on now everybody. We’ve got it goin’ on for years. Jam on ‘cause Backstreet’s got it. Come on now everybody. We’ve got it goin’ on for years." I watched each guy in turn, watching as they lived their dream.

"We’ve got it goin’ on for years." They really did have it going on for years! "We’ve got it goin’ on for years."

"We’ve been waiting so long, just can’t hold it back no more. Creepin’ up and down now, it’s time for me to let it go! Time for me to let it go! Jam on, jam on. Awww! Everybody groove to the music everybody jam, uh ow. Everybody groove to the music everybody jam, awww! Jam on ‘cause Backstreet’s got it. Come on now everybody. We’ve got it goin’ on for years. Jam on ‘cause Backstreet’s got it. Come on now everybody. We’ve got it goin’ on for years. We’ve got it goin’ on!" The last note of the song was drowned out by screams.

"Dani!" Nick screamed, running toward me. "We did it! We did it!" Nick ran and grabbed me in a hug so tight that he lifted me off the ground and I could hardly breathe. We were at a hotel in the UK, a year after the Backstreet Boys’ self titled debut album came out. It had been a year, but they had finally made it!

"I know! Nick! That amazing!" We were the only ones there because the other guys had decided to go sight seeing but both Nick and I had decided to lounge at the hotel and go swimming.

We were both drinking our Coca-Colas when we heard the radio announcer say, "That was our new number one song this morning on the Top Thirty Countdown, if you didn’t have a chance to listen to it. These guys are rising like a bullet and are actually in town! They will be doing a meet and greet with a few fans over at the..." We drown out the radio woman’s voice by more screams. They had actually done it!

It had taken Nick nearly three years to get there since our first idea back in the eighth grade at the lunch table, but he had finally made it. I wish I could say the same for myself, but at least I was there to celebrate with him.

But it wasn’t until a year later, when Nick was seventeen, that they finally made it all over the world. They released a single in the US called, "Quit Playin’ Games (With My Heart)" that had immediately gone to the top. Now the Backstreet Boys were accepted all around the world, and it felt especially nice to have sweet success in their home country.

"It took a lot of work, but we finally got here," The Boys’ manager, Johnny Wright, said while making a toast. We were at a formal ceremony for the Boys’ and their crew. Johnny finished making his speech and we toasted. I sat between AJ and Brian and I tapped glasses with them.

"Now, let’s eat!" Kevin said, and was greeted by grunts, and everyone grabbed for food, filling their plates high.

"Dani, pass me the mashed potatoes," Brian said, and handed me a plate filled with rolls. I took two and passed the mashed potatoes bowl to Brian.

I glanced up and caught Nick staring at me. When he caught my eye he smiled. I smiled back and kept on eating.

After everyone had finished eating dinner, Johnny Wright and the older guys of the group decided to go to an eighteen and up club. Me and Nick were the only ones at the table who didn’t qualify for the eighteen and up category.

"Naw, that’s okay," Nick said, waving his hand. "I’ll probably end up playing my video games all night and Dani can play with me if she wants."

"Yeah, we’ll do that." I assured everyone. "It won’t be too bad. You all go ahead to the club. It’s alright, really." I smiled reassuringly and it didn’t take any more convincing.

Nick and I decided to hole up in his hotel room for the night and play video games. Nick used his key to open up the door and I walked in behind him.

"It’s kinda messy," He said, pushing a suitcase out of the way.

"That’s okay. It’s not like my room is any cleaner." I sat down on the bed after finding the remote control and turned on the TV. "Hey, I’ll play you." I challenged, referring to the video games.

Nick looked over at me and smiled. "You’re on!" We both made ourselves comfortable on the floor in front of the TV. He pressed the start button and the screen filled with video game characters that I knew well; Mario and Luiegie. I loved playing this game, but not nearly as much as Nick did. He was probably a master at this game but I was ready to lose.

"Hey, no fair!" I cried when my player, Mario, ran into a mushroom. "In all the other video games those are good!"

"Not those mushrooms!" Nick laughed. "The red and white ones are the good ones! What you ran into wasn’t even a mushroom!" Nick passed the level easy, like a pro. I was only one level behind him, but I soon caught up.

"You wanna do something different?" Nick asked after we had been playing for nearly two hours. "I’m getting bored with this."

"Yeah," I agreed, and tossed down my controller. "But what are we gonna do?" I leaned against the bed.

"We can watch TV." Nick turned off the Nintendo and tuned the TV back into the regular cable. "I think there’s cable. There might even be some movie channels." We flipped through and settled on watching Nick at Nite. It was I Dream Of Genie, but there was nothing else on. Not to say that I don’t like that show. But after the first episode ended, Nick and I found out that it was an I Dream Of Genie marathon.

"Oh great! This show’s okay, but I don’t think I could stand a whole night of it!" Nick plucked the remote out of my hand and started flipping through the channels. "Is MTV alright with you?"

"Sure," I said. They were just going to show music videos for the rest of the night but that was fine with me. But after about five dumb videos we got bored again.

"Let’s do something else. I don’t feel like watching TV anymore." I flipped off the television set and racked my brain for a good game to play. "Let’s play deepest darkest secrets." I suggested, remembering the old game that me and my friends used to play when we were little.

"How do you play that?"

"You just tell your deepest darkest secret. It sounds corny but you’ll end up finding out things that you had no idea ever happened." I paused. "You go first. Tell me your deepest, darkest secret."

Nick thought for a while.

"Hurry up!"

"Okay, okay. I got one." He licked his lips. "You have to swear that you won’t tell anyone!"

"I swear!" I lifted up my right hand. "Nothing said here leaves this room!" Then I leaned in forward anxiously.

"Okay. I’ve never told anyone this before, you’re the first one. And you can’t laugh at me. Okay. I’ve always dreamed of...." I cut him off before he could tell me.

"Wait! I have a really good one! I have to tell you!" Nick let out a sigh of relief. I had saved him from having to tell his deepest, darkest secret. "I’ve never told anyone before either and you can’t tell. Okay. It’s really embarrassing but when I was really little, like five years old, I had these dolls that I used to play with all the time. But I’d always make up my whole life story. I’d act out my wedding and everything and I’d even make up a husband that I pretended worked all the time so he was never there." A smile played on Nick’s face. "Don’t laugh! Anyways, the baby dolls. Then I’d pretend that me and my husband wanted to have a baby so I’d stuff one of the baby dolls up my shirt and walk around and pretend I was pregnant! Then I’d actually act out giving birth to the doll!" I joined in with Nick’s laughter, remembering all of the times that I used to do that. I was such a happy kid.

"Who was your husband?" Nick asked through laughter. The question knocked the laughter out of me. "What?" Nick asked, not laughing anymore but looking concerned. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No." I stared off into the distance and remembered the husband that I had always made up for myself. He was tall, handsome, nice, and caring, had blonde hair and blue eyes and loved me through thick and thin. I hadn’t even known Nick at the age when I had made up my husband but now that I look at Nick, he resembles the husband that I had always dreamed of.

"Nick," I stopped and just stared at him.

"Dani, what’s wrong? You want some water?" He jumped up from the floor and ran to the bathroom sink and got me a glass of water. He came back and handed it to me. Even though I wasn’t thirsty, I drank it anyways and it helped. It freaked me out about the husband thing.

"Thanks." I smiled. "I’m fine now. What were we talking about before?"

"Your husband!" Nick said, satisfied that I was alright. "What did he look like?"

"Do you really want to know the truth?" Nick nodded his head eagerly. "Well, for a five year old I had pretty high expectations! He was tall, handsome, loving, caring, sweet to the core. He always loved me no matter what I did or how stupid I acted or what mistakes I made."

"What did he look like?" Nick asked again.

"Well," I paused and looked straight into Nick’s eyes. "He looked exactly like you."

Nick looked just as shocked as I had felt. "But you didn’t even know me until you were seven!"

"I know!" I cried. "But it was you! Now that I brought up my husband, I realize that it was you!" The words rang in my ears. "It was you, Nick."

He sat with his back against the wall, facing me. We sat there in silence for a while.

"Well, I guess it’s my turn." He sighed, sucking in his breath.

"I can tell you don’t really wanna say what you’re about to say so why don’t we play truth or dare or another game?"

"Truth or dare’s fine." Nick smiled devilishly. "You first. Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"You’re no fun!" He shouted, then thought about a question that he should ask me. "Okay, I got it, but you have to answer me truthfully." I nodded. "Who did you like better, me or AJ? As a boyfriend I mean." He blushed after asking me the question.

It didn’t take me long to think of the answer. "You." Nick blushed an even deeper red, but I went on. "Your turn. Truth or dare?"

"Dare." Nick smiled a wicked smile. "I like to play on the wild side."

"Okay Mr. Wild Guy," I said smugly. "I dare you to go streaking in the lobby." I leaned against the bed and crossed my arms over my chest, smiling at the expression on Nick’s face.

"Okay," He said, getting up. "Come with me and I’ll go streaking." He grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet. He led me to the door and out in the hallway, still holding my hand, and all the way down to the lobby.

"Okay," Nick whispered, looked around, and then took off his T-shirt and handed it to me. "I’m just going to run to the door and then meet me back here." He took off his shorts and handed those to me too. I stood silently, amazed that he was actually going to do it. Well I mean even I had gone streaking but it was down a dark street and no one was around. Nick was going in broad light, in a lobby where anyone could walk through that door at any time. He stood there in his boxers and looked at me. He took a deep breath and grabbed a hold of his boxers, getting ready to pull them down.

"Hey!" We both looked up with wide eyes and looked towards the voice. "What are you kids doing?" A man who looked about in his early sixties had just come walking through the door and was walking toward us. "And you!" He looked at Nick. "Why are you doing in your drawers? You get back to your room and put on some clothes, young man! And missy, I’d be ashamed of myself if I were you! You get back to your room too!" Nick and I both both stood stock-still where we were, too shocked to move. "Go!" The man yelled, and both of us ran for the elevator. I pressed the button and we waited anxiously for the elevator to arrive.

"Come on, come on!" I pleaded. The elevator dinged and the doors opened. Nick and I hopped in and I pressed the button for our floor.

Once safely inside the elevator, I handed Nick his clothes. He put them on and when the doors opened, we ran back to Nick’s hotel room.

Once inside, we both burst out laughing.

"I can’t believe that man!" Nick exclaimed, taking off his shirt again. "I mean, I can be in my ‘drawers’ if I want to! But I don’t, so I won’t! I just felt like taking off my shirt." We both burst out laughing again. I collapsed on the bed and Nick sat down on the end of the bed.

"What do you want to do now?" I asked after my giggles had subsided. But Nick didn’t get to answer because suddenly Brian burst through the door.

"Hey guys!" He shouted, his voice sounding odd. I could tell that he had been drinking. "How are ya’ll?" He slumped down on the bed next to me and put his arm around me, scooting closer to me.

"Dani, you look real pretty tonight." His breath stank of beer. "You wanna stay for the night?" He leaned his face into mine. "You look real pretty." He said again, and kissed me.

"Um.." I stammered as I slipped away from Brian, breaking away from his lips, which also tasted like beer. "Brian, I’m sorry." I said standing a few feet in front of him. "But you’re drunk and it wouldn’t be right. I have to go now." I moved to the door. "Bye Nick. Good-night." I waved and shut the door behind me.

The other guys were in the hall and I could tell that they were drunk too.

"Hey, Howie?" I said. Howie turned to me and when he did, a wave of beer met my nostrils.

"Hey, Dani." He put his arm around me and leaned his face in close to me. Not again! "Lookin’ good!"

"Howie," I said sternly, moving out from under the weight of his arm. "I need to ask you a question. Where’s AJ?"

"AJ?" Howie’s face went completely blank. Then it seemed as if a light bulb clicked on above his head. "Oh! AJ! Well he found a hottie and went home with her. It’s just his luck too! He always gets the girls. The real pretty girls too. Like you." Howie kept going on about how AJ always got the girls, but I tuned him out. Had AJ really gone home with a girl he met at the club? Would he really do that? But I knew that if AJ were as drunk as the rest of them that he probably would. But I had to make sure.

I ran back down the hall to Nick and Brian’s hotel room and burst in through the door.

"Brian!" I screamed and ran to him, nearly knocking him over.

"I knew you would change your mind!" Brian smiled, picked me up and threw me on the bed. He moved on top of me.

"No! Brian!" I grabbed him by the shoulders. "I don’t want to sleep with you!" Brian’s face collapsed and he moved off of me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Nick staring at us from his bed. "I need to know where AJ is! Please." I was close to tears. The more time that the thought of AJ sleeping with some girl from a club lingered on my mind, the more insane I went.

"AJ..." Brian seemed to sober up when I asked the question. His expression turned grim. "AJ went home with some chick from the club." He turned to me, a sorrowful look in his eyes. "I tried to tell him not to go, but he was so drunk. He was so drunk." He turned away from me.

"How drunk?" I asked. I could see Nick moving toward us.

"He had nearly ten drinks, drunk. I mean he could barely stand up straight. I don’t think he’s ever had so much beer in his life." He looked at me again. "I’m so sorry, Dani. I tried to make him stay but he punched me in the gut so I couldn’t help him after that. He had already left. I kept telling him that he a great girl here at the hotel, but he wouldn’t listen. I’m so sorry." Nick moved next to me on the bed.

"Dani..." His voice trailed off. I sat, stunned. The tears came, silently at first, but then all of what Brian had said finally caught up to me and made it’s impact. I started sobbing and I buried my head in my hands and rested my elbows on my knees.

"Dani." Nick said again. I looked up and saw that he had widened his arms. I fell into them gratefully and sobbed into his chest. He ran his hand up and down my back and tried to comfort me. He tried.

"Ugh-ahh!" I screamed out in rage and jumped off of the bed. I grabbed my hair and screamed again. I was so mad, I was nearly pulling my hair out of my head, but I felt no pain. "Why did he have to do it?!" My voice was a shrill shriek. "I loved him so much! Why?!" I grabbed Brian by the shoulders. "Was this girl pretty?" I demanded. "Sexy? What was it? What drew him to her?"

"Well, I have to admit she was pretty and sexy, but mostly his drunkenness drew him to her." I let go of Brian’s shoulders and dropped onto the bed. My moment of rage was over.

"Why?" I turned to Nick and smiled sheepishly. "Is this how you felt when AJ... and you and me were still going out?"

Nick nodded. "Pretty much. But, Dani, he’s not worth it. If he loved you enough he would have refused that girl, whether he had ten beers or not. No matter how drunk he is, he would have refused her if he loved you that much." I knew Nick’s words were true but it stung like a slap in the face.

"He does love me." I defied. Nick was not about to tell me he didn’t when I knew he did. But the question was, did I really know if AJ loved me as much as I thought? "I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. But it’s so true and that’s what hurts the most. Knowing that he doesn’t love me as much as I thought." Brian put an arm around me and patted my shoulder.

"Dani!" Nick exclaimed. "You know what I just thought of? Our dreams! Of AJ hurting you! This is what they meant." He reached for my hand. "I’m sorry that the dreams had to come true."

I was too. Very sorry. But I would make sure that AJ felt at least a little remorse for what he did. I would make sure that he was really sorry.

"AJ, it’s over!" I cried. AJ and I had been arguing about what had happened the night before for thirty minutes in the hotel room that he and Howie shared. "How many times do I have to tell you? It’s over."

"But, Dani!" He yelled defensively. "I was drunk and I didn’t know any better. And I’m sorry I slept with the girl."

"The least you could do is call her by her name and give her a little respect since you obviously have decided to give me none." I said evenly.

"Fine. Krystal. I’m sorry for sleeping with Krystal. But I was so drunk, Dani. I wouldn’t have if I weren’t so drunk." He gave me the most pathetically sad look that I have ever seen.

"You know what?" I moved closer to him. "You know what someone told me? They said that however drunk the guy is, he would refuse a slut if he loves you enough." I stopped for a second when my voice cracked. "But I guess you didn’t love me enough to turn away from her." My voice caught in my throat. I tried hard to swallow, but it wasn’t possible with the big lump in my throat.

"Dani, I love you." AJ said, holding me by the shoulders. I pushed his hands away and the hurt look in his eyes killed me inside. "Dani, you have got to understand how much I love you."

"But you didn’t love me enough to turn Krystal away." I went on before he could say anything. "And don’t give me that about you being drunk. I’m sorry AJ. I loved you too. But that’s just it. I loved you. Not present tense. Past tense. I’m sorry, but it’s over." I gave him one last look and left the hotel room. I went to Nick’s room instead of mine. I needed a hug and I needed one now.

I knocked on the door this time and was happy when Nick answered. I threw my arms around him as soon as I saw him. He was stunned at first, but then wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into the room and shut the door.

"Oh, Nick! I feel so awful!" I started crying and Nick pulled away from me.

"Dani, you know I hate it when you cry!" Nick wiped my cheeks and raised my face to his. "He should be the one to feel awful, not you." I smiled. Nick wrapped me in a hug. "Just try to think of all the good that’s going to come out of this."

I pulled away. "Like what?" Nick laughed at my unhappy tone and led me to the bed where I sat down.

"Like being able to flirt with all the guys that you meet while touring. You haven’t been able to do that." Nick went to the mirror and ran a comb through his hair.

"Hey, where’s Brian?"

"Oh, he’s in the shower." Nick replied, then continued. "And like not having to worry if AJ will like what you’re wearing and if he’ll think it’s too revealing." Nick smiled at me in the mirror. I smiled back. That was true. AJ didn’t like me wearing some of the outfits that I had because he had said they were too "revealing" and he didn’t want other guys to look at me. "And now other guys will be able to look at you." Nick echoed my thoughts exactly.

Now breaking up with AJ seemed better than it had before. Actually I didn’t mind being single. I hadn’t been single for almost five years! That was too long for me. I needed some definite guy action.

"Nick, go to the mall with me." I said, my invitation startling not only Nick but myself. "I want to meet some guys." I smiled.

"Well if you want to meet guys than going with a guy is not the way to do it. Sorry, honey." He said sarcastically.

"When then let’s just go for us. We haven’t gone anywhere together for the longest time and I want us to still have a good relationship as friends. Maybe it could turn out to be even more." Nick finally put down the comb and turned away from the mirror to look at me.

"Okay then," He said. I guess my last statement had convinced him. "We’ll go to the mall. It’s my day off anyways." He smiled. "Just for us."

But it wasn’t really just for us. As soon as we stepped into the mall, Nick was bombarded with fans. Screaming, crying, hysterical fans. It was kind of weird to have a bunch of groupies follow us around everywhere.

"Hey, Dani," Nick whispered in an exasperated tone. "Let’s leave. I wanted it to be just us and it’s not." I nodded and Nick and I managed to escape back to the car. We just sat there for a while, relaxing and enjoying the quiet.

"So," I said, reluctantly breaking the silence. "Where to?"

Nick sighed and sat up straight, placing his hands on the wheel. "I don’t know, but I want to go somewhere that has a little privacy. I haven’t been anywhere with you since.... Well, since you started dating AJ."

"Well, we could go to the movies?" I suggested.

"No." Nick thought for a minute. "Well, I guess the movies are alright. But we’ll sit in the back so we don’t disturb anybody." Nick smiled and started up the engine, turning off the radio. "We’ll get all of our talking done now so we won’t be talking through the whole movie."

And talk we did. About everything. And I really mean everything, some of it embarrassing, some of it funny, and some of it really deep. Like the sex talk. It was easy talking to Nick about something like that because both of us were at the same place on that topic: No experience but we’ve heard a lot about it.

We finally got to the movies and chose a movie that we knew not too many people would be at. We sat in the very last row and we were glad when no one accompanied us on that row. Actually no one sat in the same area as us. The closest person was nearly twelve rows away. But it was nice to have some privacy. And now that I thought about it, I missed going out to the movies with Nick. Basically, I missed Nick in general.

I guess Nick felt the same way because Nick reached over and grasped my hand. His hand felt nice over mine, warm and large, covering my entire hand. I turned to face him, but was surprised to see Nick leaning in toward me. Instinctively I closed my eyes and waited. Nick let go of my hand and wrapped both arms around me. Our lips met and a warm feeling swirled through my entire body. I touched Nick’s cheeks lightly with my hands. The kiss was a lot shorter than I thought it would be. And afterwards, Nick entwined his fingers through mine and we continued watching the movie as if nothing had happened.

But I couldn’t concentrate on the movie. I had questions running through my mind at a rapid pace. Does Nick still like me? Do I still like him? Are we going to get back together? Will AJ be mad? Why am I thinking about AJ?! Could we kiss again? Please? Will we ever get back together again? But I already knew the answer to that. The question I should be asking was When? And could we kiss again? The movie still has another forty minutes left, so we still have time! Just once more would be fine.

"As long as you love me. What you did, I don’t care, as long as you love me." The last notes of the song faded out and the Boys ran backstage when the lights had completely faded out. The screaming went continued until the lights turned back on.

The guys had just finished performing an excellent concert for a sold-out crowd overseas. They hadn’t officially started their tour but they were doing a few concerts here and there overseas. I was waiting backstage with towels and hugs for everyone when they came rushing backstage, still full of energy.

"You guys did great!" I cried happily, handing a towel to AJ and giving him a hug. Even though we had broken up only a week earlier, we were still on good terms.

Nick was the last to come backstage and I handed him a towel, but didn’t have to give him a hug. He swept me up as soon as I had handed him the towel, squeezing me in a hug so tight that I couldn’t breathe.

"Okay, you can let go of Dani now," I squeaked out. Nick put me down but still held me by my waist.

"Dani! That was awesome! It’s always so fun out there with everyone screaming and... It’s awesome!" He placed his hands on my head with his palms on my cheeks and his fingers running through my hair. He leaned down to give me a quick kiss. "It’s great." He said, still excited. He let go of me and went to go get changed and get cooled off.

"So, Dani," I turned at Brian’s voice and smiled.

"You were great, Brian!"

"Thanks. So are you and Nick back together again?" He was pouring out sweat, dabbing himself with the towel every now and then.

"Well, I don’t know," I could feel my cheeks growing warm and I knew I was blushing. Come on, Danielle! I yelled at myself. You’re only a half-month away from March when you turn eighteen and you’re still blushing when people ask you about a guy? Grow up! "I’m not really sure. We’ve been going places and stuff,"

"Describe ‘stuff’" Brian interrupted, a mischievous smile playing his lips.

"Kissing and stuff. But I still don’t know if we’re going out. It’s kind of up in the air right now. We still haven’t talked about it. Plus we go do stuff not really going to places or anything, and we don’t kiss for that long either. That kiss a few minutes ago was about as intimate as they get if that’s what you want to know." I could feel my cheeks growing even warmer and I scolded myself further.

"I asked him the same question earlier and he said the same thing. Except he said that the reason he doesn’t just flat out ask you is because he doesn’t know if you’re ready to go out with him again, your break up with AJ being not too far away and all." Brian shrugged.

"Well, I don’t even know if I’m ready to go out with someone again. I’m just not too sure if I want to risk getting hurt again." My cheeks went back to their normal color and a rush of sadness overwhelmed me. "The two boys that I really loved both hurt me in one way or another. I don’t know if I’m ready to give Nick another chance." I forced a smile. "But on to happier topics! Let’s go party!"

Brian hooted and rushed off to go get changed. A while later we all went to an 18 and over club and partied the night away.

Part VII
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