A College professor was doing a study testing the senses of
first-graders using a bowl of Lifesavers.
He gave all ofthe children the same kind of lifesaver one
at
a time and asked them to identify them by color and flavor.
The children began to say:
"Red..................cherry", "Yellow...............lemon",
"Green................lime", "Orange...............orange".
Finally, the professor gave them all honey Lifesavers.
After eating them for a few moments none of the children
could identify the taste. "Well" he said, "I'll give you all
a
clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father."
One little girl looked up in horror, spit hers out and yelled,
"Everybody, spit them out - they're assholes!!!
|
THE
CLINTON Virus....
|
Gives
you a 6 Inch Hard Drive with NO memory
|
THE
BOB DOLE Virus...
|
(aka:
VIAGRA) virus... Makes a new hard drive out of
an old floppy |
THE
LEWINSKY virus
|
Sucks
all the memory out of your computer, then
Emails everyone about what it did |
THE
RONALD REAGAN virus....
|
Saves
your data, but forgets where it is stored |
THE
MIKE TYSON virus....
|
Quits
after two bytes |
THE
OPRAH WINFREY virus....
|
Your
300mb hard drive shrinks to 100, then slowly
expands to stabilize around 200 |
THE
JACK KEVORKIAN virus....
|
Deletes
all old files |
THE
ELLEN DEGENERES virus...
|
Disks
can no longer be inserted |
THE
PROZAC virus....
|
Totally
screws up your RAM, but your processor
doesn't care |
THE
JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus...
|
Only
attacks minor files |
THE
ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus...
|
Terminates
some files, leaves, but will be back |
...and
the favorite...
THE
LORENA BOBBITT virus...
|
Reformats
your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy,
then discards it through Windows
|
|
MORE
September
11, 2001
Never Forget
Please
note that all content, unless otherwise stated, is original
work and Copyright © Imaginattic WebWorks 2001. All rights
reserved. No part of this site may be duplicated, copied or
used without the written permission of the webmaster.
GET YOUR OWN UNITY RIBBON AT UNITYRIBBON.ORG
|
