It's not that easy

You're trying not to think
Just leaving it alone
Standing on the brink admist the things you know
No destination in mind
Drifting off into space
No happiness will I find until I leave this place

But you know it's not that easy
Even though you wish it anyway
Wanting there to be something better
If you just hold on one more day

Not feeling life
Not giving in
To all the pain and the strife that attacks from within
Trying to make a peace
Before the clock winds down
And you end up six feet below the ground

And you know it's not that easy
When you cant see any other way out
And you don't have a reason for faith
Because you know what that's all about

Lazy and stressed
Always in jam and I always choke
I try to do my best but I still know it's a joke
Making plans that I know
Will never be kept
All trace of hope has already left

And you know it's not that easy
When the bad thoughts cloud your head
And all of your new solutions
Wind up with you being dead

And you know it's not that easy
When your brain is whispering suicide
And your body whispers with it
Because your will has already died

Sitting on the floor
Debating the fate of my soul
Wishing there could be more but still insisting you're in control
Just wanting to end it all
instead I fall to my knees
I have to find something that can set my mind at ease