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| How to submit etc.
Don't use the frontpage of the ms to wipe your car after a bit of rain. Never start your letter with 'dear'; the publisher/editor is aware that he/she is not always that dear. Never tell the publisher to go and 'fuck yourself'. The opposite might happen. Although, this might be prevented by using a cork in the right place. Never piss in the publishers' face and laugh at the same time. Most don't like that. Never use the word 'arse-eater'. It might give someone the wrong impression. Eat some vegetables or an orange before you send the manuscript. They might not know that you took some extra vitamines, but it won't harm anyone. Let the publisher know that you think of him/her everytime you wipe your arse. It is a small gesture but it works! Be creative! But don't overdo it. They receive enough shit as it is. And self-publishing is bad business! It is a sign of defeat! Nobody likes that in his face, all those bad poems. Some might be really bad. I can't give you an example of course; I only know how to write the really good ones! I hope you can use some of the information. Good luck! 31.May.2007 |