"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together,
let not man put asunder."
(KJV, Mark 10:6-9)

The only way to build Godly character and Scriptural convictions in your personal life, marriage, and family is to be kind and loving in all that you do.

The key to a successful marriage and family is communication. Set up a regular time each week when you and your wife can meet to define, identify, and develop Godly character in your lives, marriage, and family.

Set aside one mealtime each week when the family can discuss basic priniciples, Godly character, and Scriptural convictions.
(no fussing, talk like an adult, not a child)

A wise dad will know if each one of his family members is a Christian or not and far each one has progressed in his or her walk with the Lord.

This is a life and death struggle for individuals, marriages, and families.We must put on the whole armour of God, that we will be able to stand against the wiles of Satan.

The Husband is the head of the household

When a husband fails to be a spiritual leader...
his wife feels insecure.
When a husband does not support his wife in disciplining their children...
the wife blames him for rebellious children.
When a husband does not accept himself...
His wife can feel the same rejection from him.
When a husband praises or admires other women...
his wife feels inferior and jealous.
When a husband verbalizes love only when he wants a physical relationship with his wife...
his wife feels degraded and used and finds it hard to love him.
When a husband forgets birthdays, anniversaries and other special occasions...
his wife feels that she is unimportant and not cherished by him.
When a husband does not praise his wife for specific things...
his wife feels frustrated in not knowing how to please him.
When a husband neglects needed home repairs...
his wife builds up resentment and impatience.
When a husband lusts after other women...
his wife feels inadequate in trying to meet her husband's physical needs.
When a husband loses his temper and does not ask forgiveness...
his wife reacts to his pride.
When a husband fails to notice the little extra things his wife does for him...
his wife loses her creativity for her husband and their home and looks for outside interests.
When a husband is not alert to dangers which his wife faces...
his wife feels unprotected.
The family of biblical times had the husband as "lord" of the household and the wife as his helper. The husband worked diligently to provide material needs and protection while the wife worked diligently at domestic chores (Ward, pp. 92-94).

In these New Testament passages, the need for a strong, healthy marriage is expressed in terms of the idealized family of the ancient world:

"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers."
(NIV, 1 Peter 3:1-4, 7)

Contemporary marriages may follow the biblical model or may be quite different. Regardless of how we divide the roles and responsibilities in our marriages, though, we must be sure the marriage fulfills its essential family functions and provides a loving environment for children to grow into responsible adults.

Unselfish love is the "glue" that holds families together. In marriage we must subdue our own egos and selfish pride for the sake of the family. The Apostle Paul states it in this passage:

"Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
(NAS, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

What is a Good Argument

There are rules to keeping the argument respectful and to create opportunities for greater honesty and understanding.

• Stick to a single issue and avoid past grievances.

• No name calling.
  It only makes the argument vindictive.

• Be honest.
  Say what is on your mind and get the fight over with.

• Listen.
  Let the other person have his or her say, then have yours.

• Don't battle in public.
  Have respect for other people and yourself.

• Never hit.
  Nothing justifies violence.

• Don't threaten to end the relationship.

• Don't walk out in the middle of a fight.
  Nothing gets solved.

• Apologize.
  It doesn't hurt to say I'm sorry or I was wrong.
  In fact it mkes you a better person to know when you were wrong.
  It shows you have respect for yourself.

• Compromise.
  Go half way, it doesn't hurt.

• Don't hold a grudge.
  As the Bible says, don't let the sun set on your anger.

Disagreeing with people we care about is part of life.
The key to honorable and productive argument is respecting the other person.
If you feel like you can't contain yourself,
take a few minutes to get yourself and your thoughts together.

Divorce is a genuine tragedy. It often leaves the marriage partners embittered and disillusioned. It ROBS YOUR CHILDREN of the love and security of a healthy family and denies them a good role model for their own future marriages. The expense of divorce may consume the family savings. The work and expense of maintaining separate households means more work and less time for ourselves and our children.

We need to make an effort each and every day to keep our marriages strong and not let them drift toward divorce. We must put aside our anger, forgive our spouse a million times over, always be faithful, subdue our own pride and ego, and always let love guide our actions.

In the Old Testament Law, a man was allowed to divorce his wife at will. (Wives did not have the same privilege.) Jesus saw the injustice and pain of divorce, and said that neither husband nor wife should separate from the other:

Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?" "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?" Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
(NIV, Matthew 19:3-9)

The Apostle Paul echoed Jesus' sentiment:
"Now, for those who are married I have a command, not just a suggestion. And it is not a command from me, for this is what the Lord himself has said: A wife must not leave her husband. But if she is separated from him, let her remain single or else go back to him. And the husband must not divorce his wife."
(TLB, 1 Corinthians 7:10-11)

Adultery destroys marriages.
The adulterer shows total disregard for the marriage vows and for his or her spouse. In this passage, Jesus reminds us that not only should we always be faithful, we should also avoid any actions or situations that might eventually tempt us into adultery.

"You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery'; but I say to you, that everyone who looks on a woman to lust for her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.
(NAS, Matthew 5:27-28)

Unfortunately, some marriages cannot be saved. A marriage is a contract of mutual love and respect.

"However, each one of you a