Poetry written at 1993-94 at 19 and 20

Freedom parade

Back window of my 85 Chevy

the Sunday morning fresh

with the buzzing of frenzied

slaves whose lives are so

ritualized they could not look

backward anymore

And there she was

dancing around the stopped cars

spinning and waving her hands

the words I could make out

"Pain what choices do I make. The silence is the great affirmation of life in

this never-ending conversation."

They tried, tied, and burned her

all for the American parade

some say she worshiped the devil

I think I love her.

Dark brown flowers

fell gently upon your smiling face

and we walked on

looking like awkward lost

children oblivious to the game

of tag our friends have initiated

sit with me for I tire friend

and I wait for the day she will

finally look at me

and say I love you

The wild red hair falling gently on her face

spoke of rebellion this night

I finally sold the next watcher my badge

sky holds steady like a bee

Note: April 18, 1995 I have bought my badge back. Its all of the soul I do have left.

Beck

Garfield feasts on smurf brain

and Azrael isn't far behind

See me in the confusion

and I love you

Sun and world vacuum

the insanity with pledges of gods

Polio people fuck sheep

See me in the confusion

and I love you

Wish these days would end with a gun

and loud Hendrix music

and a pick up truck deep

in the heart of Mississippi

with a bumper sticker reading

Communist and Proud

See me in the confusion

and I love you

Shut up, Stand up

those pigs are out on the lawn

Do something for yourselves

Kill the suffering

Be angry

those people are out in

the rain and watching the lights

like insects

shut up, stand up

the masses must follow

When will this conversation end

Idiots litter my halls

bump into each other

Will the entertainment end and enlightenment begin

Masochist for fun

Heaven approached in suffering

God sits

enjoys the game in still boredom

create the devil

by splitting in half

your first audience

God exists by destroy/create

existence to see himself

Boones

The smiles of friends at the party

become cackles as the night progresses

There is a bar made of cardboard in the corner

with a frame less mirror hanging over it

and the stereo playing that horrible aerosmith

song that I found Mitch likes to sing when he

is having problems with women

and there is Jay with his Icehouse in one hand and

a cigarette in the other looking like an

Italian in heat because of the blond girl next to him

whose name I think is Jen who thinks nude dancing

is absolutely wrong

Steve's cigarettes and bottle are sucking from him and he

finds that I could be at his wake saying what a nice guy

he was

Somehow I end up in the rear seat of a black VW bug listening to Pink Floyd which always reminded me about getting stoned and waking up a few years latter with a wife and kids and saying

Where have I been?

Who are my friends?

When enough people believe the lie it becomes the truth.- unknown

 Technology- knowledge people employ to make and use objects

TV Drug

-People watch and average of 5 hours a day

-A conservative estimate of 25 hours a week

-TV takes away from your imagination (creativity) by giving images in which you will manipulate

-TV supports the status quo and enforces dominant culture values

-Opiate of the masses

-Pacifier for the angry

-Removes thoughts about themselves

-A god whose bible is the TV guide

-Values of greed, capitalism, male domination, destruction, negativity

From the book "God: A biography" by Jack Miles

"God (human) emerges as a complex and conflicted character, growing and changing, gaining self-knowledge and in the end ebbing as his life comes to a close"

"God (human) doesn't foresee because he is unpleasantly surprised. After the fall, humanity not the devil is god's antagonist"

Life is a theatre, a complex situation, where the actors on the stage always seem to try to get one more up than the other actors. These are children

Copenhagen Interpretation- "no deep reality" scientific method can not locate a "deep reality" that explains all other realties which are relative instruments (human senses)

Actuality- what humans or their instruments can detect, decode, and transmit

"Deep reality" is said to exist only in philosophical speculation

-We can only make noises about this

-Only exists in Plato and Aristotelian philosophy

Perception Psychology- we organize signals from the environment into guesses so fast that we can't observe ourselves doing so

Post Copenhagenists assume four classes- True, False, Indeterminate (not yet testable) and meaningless (forever untestable)

Conclusion: You create (active interpretation) your own model of reality

Where does the head exist? Inside the external universe but outside our brain which contains the model of the external universe

Delusion is a sign of mental health 1. Positive ideas about themselves 2. Forgetting negative facts about themselves 3. Thinking they have more control then they really do 4. Optimism about future 5. Cheerful

Self-fulfilling prophesies (affirmations) that will change your life: 1. I am a confident individual who has the acceptance of all people 2. All people will help me achieve my goals 3. People will chose my will eventually

Dissipative Structure - The more complex a thing is the more unstable it is mathematically. The result is that the more unstable a system is, the more likely it is going to change evolve.

Conversations (information) flows best between equals. The existing system where one person tries to assume a dominant position causes noise(interruption of the flow of information) within the conversation

Relativity has forced us into choosing statistical generalizations on a continuum

Canism- Commit every sin possible, just to give yourself a chance to win a difficult redemption after repenting

Manicheanism-

-The god of orthodox Christians and Jews was the devil

-True god would not lower him/her self to mess around with matter

-The god that created the world they say is a stupid and blundering force that is not truly intelligent

-Manicheanist's god inhabits pure light, thus, called the light bringer and this universe is called the realm of darkness

Gnosticism- Direct experience with god not mere knowledge of god

Right now you are reading black symbols!

Erisian Front

Your local police are armed and dangerous.

If voting could change the system, It would be against the law.

The delusion of one man is a neurosis while the delusion of many men is a religion.

Obedience is a virtue, Rebellion a sin, Vote republican.

Adopt a local animal, Vote Republican

Buy organic beer and cigarettes, the healthy alternative.

Property is liberty, theft, and impossible.