CASE CLOSED

Title: Case Closed, 1/1
Author: Jaye (Copyright July 2003)
Codes: VOY C&T PG

Disclaimer: Star Trek and all related characters and concepts are the property 
of Paramount. No infringement is intended or profit made. PG for adult themes.

Archive: Drop me a note first so I know where it's going. Please keep the text 
(especially the disclaimer) intact.

Feedback: Sure but be kind, or at least constructive. E-mail is 
reader8901@fastmail.fm

Summary: Chakotay speaks his mind in the wake of the Jonas incident.

Note: Originally written for the 2003 "Die J/C Die" contest. Set immediately 
after "Investigations". Could develop into a C/T series. I go by the original 
birth dates for Chakotay (2335) and B'Elanna (2346).

***************

"Well, now that we have Seska's link to Voyager severed and Tom back safe and 
sound, I think we should call it a day." Self-satisfaction added oil to 
Janeway's tone, even if she had schooled her features to reflect the gravity of 
the death of Michael Jonas. "All's well that ends well."

Tuvok displayed his typical non-reaction, merely gathering his padds to leave 
the Ready Room.

Chakotay set his own instruments aside with exaggerated precision. He had been 
holding his tongue until this moment, when he was certain that Voyager was safe.

He leaned forward in his chair. "I just have one more question."

Two sets of raised brows waited for him to continue.

Staring directly into the captain's eyes, Chakotay let his anger add an acid 
bite to each word. "What the hell were you thinking?"

Both Tuvok and Janeway leaned back in their seats in shock at the vehemence of 
the tone. Then she recovered her usual composure, rising to brace both arms on 
the desk. "What did you say, mister?"

Chakotay stood as well, looming over her petite form even with a desk between 
them. His quiet outrage filled the room, almost shimmering in the air around 
him.

Both of the 'Fleeters were abruptly reminded that Chakotay was, in fact, a very 
dangerous man. He usually concealed his command persona under an air of 
gentlemanly goodfellowship. But not now.

Chakotay breathed deep, refusing to give in to the fury that had been simmering 
in his gut since the moment he learned of the plot to uncover the identity of 
Seska's spy. Since the second he realized the extent of Tom Paris's deception 
and the unwitting role he himself had played in the drama that had so 
humiliatingly devolved into farce.

There were greater concerns, consequences vastly more serious than his own 
wounded pride, that needed to be addressed. "I asked you what the hell you were 
thinking to pull this stunt---not only sending Tom Paris on what amounted to a 
suicide mission, but also leaving me completely in the dark."

Tuvok had also stood, a vague thought of providing some sort of buffer driving 
him to his feet. But Chakotay simply held his ground, eyes blazing.

Waiting.

Janeway swallowed and tilted her chin, attempting to smother Chakotay's heat 
with her icy hauteur. "Commander, we've been over this already. We felt your 
knowing participation would compromise our chances of the ruse succeeding."

"And it was such a brilliant plan you simply had no other choice but to 
implement it?" Chakotay suddenly abandoned his pose and moved back to perch on 
one arm of his chair. His features twisted in contempt. "*That* was the best you 
could come up with? Destroy Paris's already-tarnished reputation, then abandon 
him to the tender mercies of Seska and the Kazon?"

He snorted. "What would have happened if they hadn't been stupid enough to put 
him in a room with a communications console---or worse, if they'd stripped him 
or searched him and found that little device you planted on him?"

"Speculation on what might have gone wrong is hardly relevant, Commander. Mr. 
Paris was successfully retrieved and the spy Michael Jonas neutralized." The 
stiffness of Tuvok's posture matched his words.

An arched eyebrow shifted Chakotay's tattoo. "You think so? As a fellow 
tactician I can't believe you endorsed this scheme, Tuvok. I can imagine a dozen 
safer ways to find the spy---ones that don't involve risking a man's life."

He shook his head in disbelief. "You believed the culprit was Maquis. Why didn't 
you use that to your advantage? You could have laid a canary trap---had each 
suspect look a different place for more information, or leaked the same juicy 
tidbit to different people at predetermined times. Or you could have simply 
deciphered the transmissions and figured out the source that way."

One hand swept the air as if dismissing the very idea as preposterous. "But of 
course you couldn't involve *any* of the Maquis---we were all on your list of 
possible spies. You didn't trust Torres or Ayala to help decode the signal---
which, by the way, Tuvok, was a variation on an old Maquis system that we 
abandoned before you infiltrated the cell. It would have taken them less than a 
day to figure it out."

Chakotay's eyes raked the two once more. "Nor did you consider narrowing your 
search by asking me who would be likely to side with Seska. Or even bother to 
let me know that ship's security had been compromised. Yep, that was certainly 
one for the textbooks."

Janeway snapped back, "It worked, didn't it?"

"At what cost?" Chakotay retorted. "Do you have any idea what you've wrought? 
What's already happening among the crew?" He searched Janeway's face, his own 
expression grave. "You've redrawn the line between Maquis and Starfleet."

He snorted. "Carved it into a canyon, more accurately. The 'Fleeters now know 
you *still* don't think the Maquis are worthy of your trust."

He sighed in genuine weariness. "And the Maquis are back to believing they'll 
never be equals here. That they'd be better off taking their chances with their 
own ship---and maybe even that the ship should be Voyager."

Janeway and Tuvok shared a glance full of uncertainty. They'd banked on the crew 
uniting in their disdain for Seska and her pawn. They hadn't expected to lose 
that particular gamble. They both sat back down.

Chakotay remained perched where he was, again simply waiting.

"It's obvious we need to contain this as soon as possible." Janeway laced her 
fingers together, brows drawn in concentration.

"If the commander's assessment is true, Captain, the crew is clearly projecting 
their own anxieties onto what they perceive is your lack of confidence in your 
First Officer." Tuvok considered a moment. "The most logical way to remove the 
anxiety is to alter the perception."

"Agreed," Janeway said, her expression clearing. She rested her elbows on the 
desk, hands shaping the air as if cataloging the elements of her new strategy. 
"We'll all make a point of appearing together for the next few weeks---a show of 
command solidarity. Also, Chakotay, I think it would be good for you to drop a 
few hints that you think things are being blown out of proportion. Maybe even 
joke that you agree that your acting skills weren't up to snuff."

"Oh, so you want *me* to start lying too now, is that it?" Chakotay's lips 
twisted once more with derision.

Janeway's mouth thinned to a tight line of anger at the jibe. "Watch your tone, 
*Commander*. You're skirting the edge of insubordination. I appreciate that 
you've brought up a valid concern, but I am simply not in the mood to deal with 
your bruised ego on top of everything else that's happened. Bottom line---you're 
not exactly known for your skill at deception. The stakes were too high to risk 
the whole operation on your performance. You were a liability we couldn't 
afford."

She glared, every inch the Starfleet captain issuing orders. "You will do 
whatever is necessary to ensure the welfare of this crew. Including telling them 
that you're okay with being kept out of the loop."

Chakotay stood slowly. "I don't think so, Captain. This is one mess I'm not 
going to clean up for you. If any of the crew come to me, then I'll help them 
deal with the fallout one-on-one. And any talk of mutiny will be addressed. But 
I'm not going to pretend everything is fine between us, because it isn't. And 
I'm not sure when, or if, it ever will be again."

In contrast to his earlier upset, now Chakotay was completely calm as he 
assessed his...superior. "*You* broke the trust. Between captain and First 
Officer, between Starfleet and Maquis. This situation could have brought all of 
us closer together, but now---" His eyes darkened, a glimpse of the turmoil that 
still raged behind his placid exterior. "---now you'd better hope that my acting 
ability exceeds your expectations, or every man and woman on this ship will know 
just how great my contempt is for you."

He didn't ask to be dismissed. Stunned silence followed him out the door.

************************************************************

B'Elanna picked her way delicately down the stone steps cut into the rock wall. 
She knew the holodeck safeties were on, so there was no chance of falling, but 
the sheer drop on her left-hand side was giving her a touch of vertigo.

The sun-warmed rock on her right felt like a living thing as she pressed her 
palm to the cliff face for security. She continued downward, seeking her quarry.

B'Elanna was so focused on scanning the sere and rugged landscape she almost 
missed Chakotay.

He was seated on a ledge jutting from the wall where the natural staircase 
turned a corner to continue down to the valley. His feet were dangling over open 
air, and his face was somber as he gazed at the vista of stone painted by long-
ago rivers. The descendant of those mighty floods was a twisting shadow far 
below.

"Hey, Chakotay," B'Elanna said quietly. She hesitated, gauging his mood, then 
stepped onto the ledge.

The uneven surface was covered in loose dirt and stone. One foot slipped, 
sending her off-balance, arms flailing in an attempt to regain her stability. 
She keenly felt the empty space yawning so close.

Then strong fingers grasped her forearm, pulling her forward. Her free hand 
clamped on Chakotay's shoulder as she caught her breath.

B'Elanna's laugh was shaky as she maneuvered to match Chakotay's position: feet 
swinging into the abyss, back securely pressed against the rock wall. "Not 
exactly the best place for a rendezvous, old man."

Chakotay grunted and let go, giving his companion a sidelong glance. "I wasn't 
planning on company."

"No, you like to do your brooding alone." When no response was forthcoming, 
B'Elanna shifted to the nominal reason for her visit. "I received confirmation 
from Ayala. Word is out: no one expresses their displeasure on Paris's hide." 
She shifted irritably as she muttered, "But I still think the smug p'tahq could 
use taking down a peg or two."

Chakotay's profile softened into a fond grin as he murmured, "Sheathe those 
claws, tiger. He isn't worth it." His expression sobered as he sighed. "I don't 
think Paris is really the problem, anyway. He was just following orders. Like 
Tuvok. And Seska."

B'Elanna felt a frisson of alarm at the despondent tone. Chakotay was the most 
resilient person she knew, time and again bouncing back from tragedy or 
disappointment, ready to offer hope and consolation to those around him. In all 
the time she'd known him she'd never heard him sound so defeated.

Mentally she cursed Seska and Jonas for creating this situation, and Janeway, 
Tuvok and Paris for making such a mess of it and dragging Chakotay along with 
them. But that wouldn't do Chakotay any good. He'd already shown his lack of 
interest in revenge when he'd decreed Paris off-limits. Still, there had to be 
something she could do for her friend. A man who, if she were honest with 
herself, she wished was even more.

B'Elanna thought of all the times Chakotay had pushed and prodded until she 
shared her troubles, and the way he listened to her grumbles without judgement 
or censure. The least she could do was try to return the favor.

She wormed her right arm inside the angle of Chakotay's left, pressing palm to 
palm, twining their fingers together. She nudged his ribs. "Talk to me, 
Chakotay."

Chakotay sighed, running his other hand through his hair before dropping it to 
his lap.

For a long time they sat in silence. Chakotay struggled within himself to decide 
whether he should burden B'Elanna with the jumbled emotions he was still trying 
to work through.

He'd admired the fierce young woman since the moment they met. She was certainly 
a fighter, protective of her friends, merciless toward her enemies. Bold and 
brilliant in the area of engineering, hesitant and almost shy outside of it. 
Hiding her insecurity beneath a gruffness that only made her more endearing.

Chakotay knew that in a way he did her a disservice by refusing to open up. 
B'Elanna was a clear-eyed adult, tempered by her rough-and-tumble life, more 
pragmatic than himself in some ways. Also more honest, dismissive of 
smokescreens like prevarication and dissembling. And tact. He almost smiled 
again despite the somber nature of his thoughts.

Decision made, he tilted his head back and squeezed the slender fingers in his 
own. "I was just wondering whether I should apologize to you---to all of our old 
comrades."

"Apologize? For what?" Puzzlement turned B'Elanna to face her companion more 
fully.

"For proving yet again you had a fool for a cell leader." Chakotay shrugged. 
"I'm starting to believe we were lucky to have survived at all."

This was worse than B'Elanna expected. "Chakotay, you're the injured party here. 
You shouldn't sit here blaming yourself. You should be railing against the way 
Tuvok and the captain treated you."

The brown eyes that glanced her way held a brief flash of mischief. "I already 
did that. Before you turned the corner I was half-expecting you to be my escort 
to the brig."

"You told Janeway off?" B'Elanna felt an unexpected surge of glee that she 
quickly suppressed. "Then why are you beating yourself up about this? You 
couldn't have had any idea you were being deliberately manipulated by your own 
colleagues."

"B'Elanna, I should have known---or at least had some inkling that Paris wasn't 
on the up and up. His actions didn't make any sense at the time, but I dismissed 
my doubts as just not understanding how Paris's mind works. I believed he was 
sincere. That all of them were." Chakotay's eyes dropped as he shook his head. 
"Even Kes seems to be less naive than I am."

He looked once more at the canyon. "I let two spies into my cell. If we hadn't 
been thrown out here by the Caretaker we would have ended up in a Federation 
prison---or worse, a Cardassian POW camp. And here on Voyager, I've been made a 
patsy by my own captain---who would rather trust a two-bit ex-mercenary instead 
of her own First Officer. What does that say about me?" His voice roughened as 
he struggled to contain the swirl of guilt and grief. "I keep thinking how all 
of you deserve so much better."

B'Elanna would always be grateful to Kathryn Janeway for making her Voyager's 
Chief Engineer. But at that moment, she could cheerfully have strangled the 
captain without a second thought. She released her hold on Chakotay's hand to 
grip his shoulders and turn him to face her. Then she shook him, good and hard. 
"Bullshit," she said.

Chakotay broke her hold, leaning back out of range. "What?"

"You heard me." B'Elanna crossed her arms to resist the temptation to shake more 
sense into him. "Chakotay, you believe in people. That's part of your nature. 
You give them the benefit of the doubt."

She noticed his wary posture relax slightly; he was listening. Her voice gained 
strength as she continued, "To be accepted, to be trusted when you figure the 
whole universe is out to get you...that's more important than you can ever 
know."

She raised her brows. "Just how do you think you managed to turn a ragtag bunch 
of drifters and angry rebels into a fighting force that made you a target for 
both the Federation *and* Cardassia? Your boyish good looks?"

B'Elanna grinned as Chakotay snorted and rolled his eyes. But then she sobered 
as she regarded him. It was time for a few more home truths. "Chakotay, let's 
face it. Nobody's perfect. All of us were fooled by Seska and Tuvok---hell, 
Seska may have been your lover but she was my best friend. And what happened 
with Jonas took everybody by surprise. Nobody thought Paris was pretending, and 
not one of us---Maquis *or* 'Fleet---would have expected the captain to keep you 
completely in the dark."

She reached out and grasped his hands, needing the contact. "This crew may be on 
shaky ground at the moment, but one thing we're all sure of is that we trust 
*you*, Chakotay. And your trusting in us as you always have is what's going to 
heal the cracks created by Seska's and Janeway's mind games. So if that makes 
you a fool, you can be damn sure that I---" she faltered for only a moment at 
the slip "---we---wouldn't want you any other way."

Chakotay tilted his head, searching B'Elanna's face, gauging her sincerity. 
Wondering if he could accept the balm of her words to ease the pain in his soul. 
Even as bruised and battered his faith in his own judgement had become, he 
couldn't bring himself to doubt B'Elanna. Not when it came to this. "Okay."

B'Elanna's heart skipped a beat at the shy smile on Chakotay's face. Her own 
lips curved even as a blush rose in her cheeks. "All right, then," she muttered, 
ducking her head as she scooched back into her original position by Chakotay's 
side.

Chakotay put an arm around B'Elanna's shoulder and gathered her closer to 
himself. He sighed and rubbed his cheek against her hair as she leaned into him. 
"Do you know what the worst part of all this has been?"

She just shook her head, sliding her own arm around his waist as she made 
herself comfortable.

"I thought I was in love with her." Chakotay's admission was a pained whisper.

B'Elanna froze. Swallowing, she said just as quietly, "Captain Janeway?"

Chakotay nodded, a rueful grimace squinting his eyes. "Yes. I imagined us thrown 
together by fate. It was just that...I haven't had such a sense of peace since 
the day I resigned from Starfleet." He sighed. "Now I have to wonder whether she 
was really the cause, or if that was just me building my relief at being 
accepted by Starfleet again into something more."

"Can you explain?" B'Elanna asked. She thought it ironic to be ensconced in 
Chakotay's embrace while they discussed his feelings for someone else, but then 
they'd shared a lot of odd experiences over the course of their friendship.

His brow furrowed as he spoke slowly, trying to feel his way through the tangle 
of emotions. "I realized earlier when I was confronting the captain that I 
didn't perceive her the same way anymore."

He chuckled. "I was so mad I couldn't see straight, but I managed to keep things 
on a professional level. And when I got here, I realized that I didn't want to 
go back and hash out the personal betrayal anymore. It was like Kathryn broke 
her hold on me on both levels when she chose to use me as a pawn in her game."

He tightened his arm around B'Elanna, turning the gesture into a hug. "I know I 
don't love her; I can't, because I don't trust her anymore. And you can't have 
one without the other." He looked down at her. "I'm not sure if I can even be 
friends with her now."

B'Elanna debated with herself a moment. A nascent jealousy was urging her to 
keep Chakotay thinking along this path, to sever his ties completely. If he 
never forgave Janeway he would never be tempted to imagine himself still in love 
with her.

In the end though, Chakotay's trust in her forced B'Elanna to speak the truth. 
Just as she always expected from him. "You know you're just blowing smoke, 
Chakotay. A united command team is good for the crew, and you always do what's 
best for them." She tilted her face up to his, wistfully measuring how close 
their lips were. It would take the slightest move on either of their parts to 
bridge that gap.

But she couldn't do it. Not now, while Chakotay needed her as a friend.

She tried on a mischievous smile. "Just promise me you'll make her work for it, 
will you?"

Chakotay laughed, feeling the weight of burdens both known and unnamed sliding 
from his psyche. His heart warmed as he thanked whatever kind fate had given him 
such a good friend in B'Elanna.

Such a bright spirit, such an honest sounding board...such a beautiful woman.

The sudden realization of just how much B'Elanna might mean to him stole 
Chakotay's breath. He stared, drinking in the wide dark eyes set in a face that 
was uniquely attractive.

He blinked and firmly took control of his wayward thoughts.

She would not be someone he just picked up on the rebound from Kathryn. B'Elanna 
deserved better. Of *that*, he had no doubt.

He leaned forward slightly and pressed a ghost of a kiss to her forehead. "Thank 
you," he said softly.

"You're welcome," was B'Elanna's equally quiet reply.

Then the two friends resumed their contemplation of the canyon. Lost in their 
own thoughts.

Content.

THE END