Title: Harm and Mac Songbook: Just An Old Fashioned Girl

 

Author: Rising Sun

E-mail: jag@lucianstuff.every1.net

URL: http://www.geocities.com/jagrslc

 

Rated: PG

Classification: Story/Humor

 

Summary: As a record lottery jackpot gets ready to be called the MAc and the JAG Ladies get silly.

 

Disclaimer: JAG characters portrayed belong to JAG, CBS and Paramount Television. No copyright infringement intended.  All other characters depicted are purely fictional and any similarities to actual people are purely coincidental.

 

Performing in this saga: Eartha Kitt sings Just An Old Fashioned Girl

 

Feedback: Would be nice.

 

Story Written September 2001

 

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LOTTERY NIGHT

1835 LOCAL

ROBERTS RESIDENCE

 

Mac was curled up on one of the ultra comfortable chairs and was too content to move.  She looked round at what was fast becoming the JAG Ladies Club. Lord knew where the men were or what they were up to and she Mac didn't want to know.

 

"Refreshers anyone?" Harriet asked.

 

"Sure" Carolyn said and held up her glass.

 

"Did any one venture out to buy a lottery ticket today?" Jackie asked.

 

"Do I look like I'm crazy?" Mac quipped.  "With 850 million dollars at stake the lines have been endless. Got mine ... well actually Gunny got mine for me.  I can't believe the roll this pot has been on."

 

"Folks have been coming in from other States to get tickets."  Harriett revealed.

 

"That usually happens with the jackpot is high." Lauren said.

 

"Oh high. High she calls it." Carolyn teased.   "This thing is humongous!"

 

"Bud has been running calculations all week trying to get the best number combination for a win." Harriett said.

 

"One ticket picked by the computer and I'm armed." Mac stated.

 

"So if one of us wins what then?" Lauren asked.

 

There was silence.

 

"I hadn't thought about that!" Mac chuckled. "Let's see... I'm just an old fashioned girl with an old fashioned mind not sophisticated I'm the sweet and simple kind, so I want an old fashioned house with an old fashioned fence and an old fashioned millionaire.  How's that?"

 

"You? An old fashioned girl?" Harriett scoffed, "What I'd like is a plain simple car a series Cadillac long enough to put a bowling ally in the back and I also want an old fashioned house with an old fashioned fence and an old fashioned millionaire."

 

Carolyn chuckled.  "Well I'm assuming that I have the husband, so I'll stay weaving at my loom be no trouble to my groom if he'll keep the piles of money mounting and in our cottage there will be a sound proof nursery not to wake the baby while I'm counting!" She burst out laughing.

 

Not to be out done Lauren stated.  "I like the old-fashioned flowers violets are for me have them made in diamonds by the man at Tiffany ... you can keep the old fashioned house with the old fashioned fence and the old fashioned millionaire."

 

"As for me." Jackie began "I'm just a pilgrim at heart oh so pure and gentile watch me in Las Vegas when I'm at the spinning wheel, with an old millionaire, you can keep the fashion."

 

"Add to that the fact that I'd ask for such simple things when my birthday occurs two apartment buildings that are labeled hers and hers." Mac laughed.

 

"I like Chopin and Bizet and the songs of yesterday string quartets and Polynesian carols but the music that excels is the sound of oil wells as they slurp slurp slurp into the barrels!"  Harriett was in

stitches.

 

"Oh you are too ridiculous.  Our little home will be quaint as an old parasol and instead of carpet I'll have money wall to wall." Lauren admonished with tears of laughter streaming down.

 

"Oh quick its time for the draw!" Harriett squealed.

 

Amidst noises of sniffing from the laughter the JAG Ladies scanned their tickets.

 

"WELL!" Mac declared "I light of the fact that none of us won and not with standing that I love my husband dearly ... I don't want any more.  I NEED an old fashioned house with an old fashioned fence and an old fashioned millionaire!"

 

The group collapsed in gales of laughter.

 

THE END.

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