Title: Incidents Abound
Author: Kendra
Rating: Silliness
Summary: Incidents abound when the General takes a morning jog.
Archive: ok
Disclaimer: I do this for my own sorted amusement and hopefully to corrupt others.
Timeline: following Regrouping

~~~~~~~~~~~

"So I hear you had some action today!" Judy grinned as she placed the mega margarita in front of Kendra as she and Ellie sat at the bar. "Kinda like a hit and run?" she laughed as Ellie joined in while Kendra muttered obscenities under her breath.

"Funny, so very funny..." Kendra grumbled. "Tell me something does everybody know what happened?"

"Oh I'm sure there's one or two people who haven't heard." Judy calmly said as she fought a giggle.

"Not!!!" she and Ellie loudly laughed as Kendra just closed her eyes and let her forehead find the cool comfort of the bar before her.

"I wish I could have been there," Ellie said through tears of laughter. " I mean the way Kymira explained 'the incident' was too much!"

"Explained what?" Kymira questioned as she and Robin entered the room.

"Kendra's little accident." Judy stated.

"Oh my God, you had to have been there to really appreciate the full picture! I mean one minute we were rollerblading behind the General and Dorotea as the jogged and the next minute...Blamm, this tree just jumps out in front of Kendra and she slams into it full speed!" Kymira said quite animatedly as a loud groan could be heard from the bar surface as Kendra just thumped her head steadily.

"Imagine if you will silly putty thrown against the wall...that was exactly what it looked like!" Kymira laughed as the others joined in and little by little the small group grew, as more wanted to hear the story.

"So that's how she broke her wrist and sprained her ankle." Lynne remarked as she glanced at Kendra who was now softly chanting incoherently but atleast the head bashing had stopped.

"Hell no!" Dorotea loudly objected as she walked in and joined the group.

"What, I don't understand?" Robin quizzed as all heads turned to see Dorotea as she sat down and grabbed Kendra's untouched margarita and took a sip.

"She twisted her ankle when the General went to go see if she were alive or dead." Dorotea stated as she noticed the puzzled looks on some of the Ho's faces. "You see, when he walked over to check on her she suddenly regained consciousness and quickly stood up, forgetting about being on blades and her feet flew out from under her, so needless to say she took the General down with her in one fatal swoop."

"That doesn't sound bad to me..." Robin suddenly spoke up.

"Normally I'd agree" Kymira mused, "but this time while the two of them dropped to the ground, she punched him in the jaw which sent him off balance, landing on Kendra's ankle, and voila, a sprained ankle for her and a bruised jaw for the General."

"So that's how she broke her wrist, hitting the General?" Jael asked as she joined the group, "I mean she must have hit him pretty good, I saw him go into his office a little while ago with a black eye."

"No, that didn't happen until the General carried her into the clinic." Dorotea corrected as she glanced at Kendra who just loudly groaned beside her.

"Ok, I'm totally confused!" Robin interrupted.

"Well you see, once the General carried her into the clinic it seems they interrupted Darry during one of her visitations." Dorotea grinned, "let's just say Kymira thought on her feet, rolling into the General hard enough to knock him off balance sending him and Kendra to the floor for the second time in a matter of minutes, giving Darry enough time to toss Xani out the window."

"Darry's going to hunt me down and kill me..." Kendra loudly mumbled from her prone position at the bar.

"Probably!" JenJen agreed as she thought back to the last time Darry was interrupted; it wasn't a pretty image. "After she tortures Kendra, she'll probably have her rolling bandages for the next week and that's the good stuff."

"And that's how the General got his black eye and Kendra broke her wrist." Robin again remarked knowing this had to explain things.

"Hold on..." Judy laughed, "there's more!" As a strangled whimper could be heard emanating from the devastated Ho with the wrist cast. "Go on Kymira, give them the killer ending to this tale!" she encouraged.

"Well you see, Darry was rather pissed at being interrupted, so her bedside manner was a little abrupt. So when she gave Kendra a shot to ease the pain in her ankle, she didn't warn her ahead of time. Therefore, making Kendra pull her arm away after getting a rather nasty shot, which inturn slammed her fist into the General's face as he stood by to make sure she was alright." Kymira laughed uncontrollably as the others joined in.

"Sounds like a bad three stooges movie!" Ellie teased mercilessly as the laugher built. "You know that's the last time Kendra's going to be allowed anywhere near the General!" she sighed loudly before walking over to put an arm around her fallen roomie. "Cheer up girl, everybody will forget about this incident in a few years, except maybe Emmy who's not going to be too happy once she gets a look at the General's face."

"Oh great, she's going to kill me too..." Kendra loudly groaned as she finally lifted her head from the bar and slowly stood up. "Guess she'll have to just take a number, looks like there are a few others before her..." she tiredly sighed before hobbling out of the room as the others tried to stop her with promises that they wouldn't laugh any longer.

"Maybe we pushed her a little too far" Judy remarked as she watched Kendra limp slowly out.

"She'll be fine, just let her get a good night's sleep and this will all be like a bad dream." Ellie insisted, "she'll bounce back you'll see!"

"I hope so. But we did rag on her a little much." Judy thought aloud "But you're probably right, she'll forget 'the incident' by morning, we'll just have to find something to keep her occupied until she heals."

"And keep her away from Darry, Emmy, the General and most especially those rollerblades" Dorotea stated as she grabbed her drink. "But you want to know the truth, I would have slammed into that tree myself if I were a frosh. I mean the General in those black jogging pants and tank top would have undone me too back then...hell it almost undid me this morning!" she confessed as the image floated happily amongst those still gathered.

While outside:

"Kendra, wait up a second!" the General shouted from across the well-manicured lawn as he approached the bedraggled Ho.

"Oh no...." Kendra sighed once she heard that familiar accent and hung her head as she kept walking, thinking to herself that the man must have a death wish....