*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

~*~It was a bright and sunny morning~*~

"What the hell is it with all these admissions... you'd think we were some kind of wild, fun place with an utter lack of conservative rules."

"That would be," Caeryn said, strolling calmly into the office, avoiding the edge of a very solid piece of wood furniture, "because we are."

From behind the stack of datapads, paper and folders piled a metre high, Shana banged her head against the oak surface. "Thanks, Mistress Dean. So where's the General? I have a papercut he could kiss and make better."

Caeryn shook her head and handed over a datapad, adding it to the stack of equipment already covering the unshakeable earthquake-couldn't-crash-it desk. "He's occupied."

There was a groan. "Die or Emmy?"

"Emmy. Now make sure that one I just gave you gets taken care of right away. The frosh class can wait for a bit."

"Sure..." Shana paused, watching Caeryn strut out the office, a grin on her face as she thought about her own morning General appointment. "Hey! What's this about the maintenance guy?! I thought he was working out!"

~*~The birds were singing~*~

"General, honey, I worship at your... uh, feet, but if you don't get your elbow out of my kidney I might have to hurt you."

Sitting up, the spoon in his hand still heavily laden with Nutella, Obi-Wan gave his Ho an ice-melting smile. "Sorry, where were we?"

Emmy crossed her arms. She wasn't going to fall for it... completely. "You were quoting Shakespeare and feeding me chocolate."

"Oh, right. Where was I?"

Angling up to peer at the book, stealing a look at the sprinkle of chest hair exposed by his partially open shirt, Emmy sighed and pointed. "Right here."

"'To any sensual feast with thee alone:/ But my five wits nor my five senses can / Dissuade one foolish heart from serving thee-' Emmy, give back the spoon."

Shifting the utensil in her mouth, she quirked her head, the tiara shifting a little. "Buth I thawt thath thith wath my thocolathe?"

Plucking the spoon from her mouth, giving the Smut Queen the Look, the General held it aloft, only a few bits of gooey chocolate on it. "No, it's -our- chocolate."

About to give him a muddled comment, Emmy's eyebrows shot up as he swooped down and kissed her hard, parting her lips and...

Stealing the Nutella.

"Hey!"

"Share and share alike, dear."

Emmy made a strangled sound.

~*~The flowers were blooming~*~

"Whaddya mean 'currently down?!' This is a fully functioning university with vital systems that are highly dependent on reliable service and quick connection speeds! I have an appointment book to keep, dammit! Do you know what it's like to book Serious Discipline sessions three weeks in advance? You try having a General give you the Stance as he passes by you while you do real work! You try to key in programming when those eyes are giving you the Look! You-"

Jael, sitting in a chair with her ear to a portable phone on the same line, waved her hand around. "Uh, Dieben."

"What?"

"You're being rude."

"Am not!"

"Are too."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am! Not!"

Space Dog raised his head, suddenly listening to the bickering.

"Are! Too!"

"Hey Grrls, what's this about Artoo? You didn't steal him again, did you?"

Dieben paused. "Hey Darry. Um, no. Should we have?"

"Not this time. Anyways, where's Dande? General demanded I gave her a pregnancy test."

Exchanging looks, the two Hos paused and then looked back at the intrepid Nurse Darry. "Probably still in the tower dusting off the clone."

Picking a bit of fuzz off her Armani suit, Darry sniffed and turned to leave. "It can wait then. I'll be in my cramped, little, unfurnished and unloved little hovel of an office if you need me."

Space Dog lowered her head and covered her ears with her paws. Jael raised an eyebrow.

"Still haven't told her that that's just her supply closet, huh?"

Dieben grinned. "Nope. I figure one of these times when the General has her jammed against the door it'll fly open into the rather spacious HSU clinic."

"You are -such- a tease."

~*~And the mushroom cloud cast a lovely shadow over the field~*~

"Grrr."

"Oh, no, no, no. We are -not- doing this again. You speak english, use it!"

"Grawr?"

"I just had to cancel that massage therapy session, didn't I?"

"Grrr."

Shana flung a pencil at the... thing standing before her. "Listen, Vocab Man, when Palpy called and 'recommended' us to you, we weren't going to say no. And before you get that Sithly glint in your eye, we didn't hire you out of estrogen brigade-ish love, we did it because..."

"Because of what?"

Lowering her eyes and shuffling a few datapads, Shana flashed her Newbie-Recruiter smile. "Oh, no reason, but it's a favour and we'll leave it at that."

"I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that."

With a sigh, the auburn haired Mistress of Paperwork vaulted over her desk and poked a finger at the overall clad Vocab Man, a grin spreading over her face as she loomed six inches over his head. Resisting the urge to tug at one of the short little horns, she leaned down, brandishing a stack of papers. "These are complaints. From students. You know, the ones that matter here and come running to me when you terrify them in the middle of the night because you're unplugging someone's drain."

"But it was clogged and I had an order."

"And I have a very busy life best not interrupted by half dark, half bleached blonde freshmen storming my office in the middle of the night when I'm busy shaggi-discussing things with the General. You'll do everything before 10 pm unless it's an emergency, and only then with admin approval."

"And what if you are unreachable?"

About to point out that it would take a seam ripper and ten minutes to undo the stitches at his waist, Shana sighed. "Then you contact your actual supervisor?"

"Who is?"

She paused. If she said the General, he'd withhold sex. If she said

Dieben, she'd have her appointment database rights yanked. If she said Emmy... well she wouldn't say Emmy. She knew better; that tiara was making her a megalomaniac. Almost saying Darry, she stopped herself. Never ever piss off those that have the big needles.

"Talk to Caeryn."

~*~And the static charge in the air was making her hair curl~*~

"I don't think they'll fund -that.-"

"Is it so wrong to request funding for an opera house in addition to the updated and technologically superior theatre?"

"Well," Caeryn grumbled, setting aside the violin she was tinkering around with, "after our benefactors turned down the THX certified, 25 speaker, plush seated cineplex, I figure we shouldn't push our luck."

Banaoire nodded. "So, classes?"

"Classes."

"I was thinking voice lessons."

There was a pause and the same thought occurred to both women. "Is this class for the students or the General?"

Banaoire locked eyes with a particularly interesting spot on the ceiling.

"Yes?"

"Did I hear the General mentioned?" Bouncing in, clad in her catsuit and hip strapped blaster, Darth Dieben waiting for an answer to her question.

Caeryn grinned. "We mention the General as often as possible."

"So is he here?"

Ban shook her head. "Do you think we'd be vertical and discussing course listings if he was?"

There was a pause. "Probably not. Emmy still got him?"

"Dunno, why don't you ask her."

"Oh."

And with that Dieben bounced out of the area, singing Weird Al to herself.

"So, anyhoo.. music courses..."

"Choral and orchestral ones, of course. Maybe some special studies for different instruments?"

"Like the skin flute?"

Banaoire coughed. Okay, she -had- thought of it, but... "Are you sure that's the music department?"

Caeryn blinked, considering. "You know, I'm just not sure."

~*~But at least the screams of agony had ceased... for the most part~*~

It was a simple task. Vocabulary Man was to move the harse into an area near the maze so that the security patrols would stop attaching parking violation tickets it. That was it.

Until Emmy spotted Dande wandering near the maze just as Vocab Man was attempting to tie the harse up, which made Emmy break into a run for Dande and somehow not give it away to the slightly wobbling General (going in for a nap after 36hrs of... well, you know) that it was his arch enemy and supposedly dead Sith that was keeping the lawns and dormitories clean.

"Dande! Stop! Don't go over there!"

The lovely Master girl, her hair flowing like silk in the wind froze, giving Emmy a bewildered look. "Is there something wrong? Oh please don't tell me that horrible evil creature has found me...!"

Skidding to a stop and noting with a sigh the mud spraying all over her good shoes, Emmy raised a hand. "No, its not Darth Ginsu, you're still safe. Just... um, just come with me. We have," pausing to watch the dramatic sigh of relief laid out before her, "chocolate in the lounge. Yeah, why don't you join us there. Popcorn too."

Her graceful poise returning, Dande smiled, her lips curving up like crescent moons, her hand delicately stroking across her flat abdomen. "The baby and I would like that."

Emmy choked back a snort and pointed towards the main building of HSU, guiding the delicate creature away from the clutches of their slightly inarticulate and over all harmless maintenance man.

They were safe for another day.