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| Part 2 : Do You Feel My Touch |
| "Justin!" Ty called. "Hurry up!" Justin had decided to stay with Ty instead on moving back into Deb's place. Ty had a good-sized apartment, and Justin knew he would have a good time staying with his cousin. Tonight was Ty's night off so he and Justin were heading out to Babylon. "I'm coming. I'm coming." Justin stepped into the living room dressed in a pair of black pants and a tight white cotton shirt. He was secretly hoping to see Brian at the club and make him want him back. "Looking good, cuz." Ty said. He slid his hand through his hair to perfect his messy, just-out-of-bed look. 'Let's go." He threw a casual arm around Justin and they left the apartment. Liberty Avenue was already very busy, as usual on Friday night. There were guys everywhere and the pair of cousins were getting hit on right and left. At 22, Ty looked like an underwear model. Justin, of course, attracted the guys who liked the young, sweet look. Between the two of them, they attracted more men than most groups. Justin remembered that was how it was when he walked down Liberty with Brian. Except that no one hit on him while he was with Brian, they knew better. As they were about to enter Babylon, Justin glanced over and saw the Jeep. Brian's Jeep was parked in it's usual spot so Justin knew that he and the boys were inside. His heart started beating a little faster. "Hey, Justin." Ty said in a funny voice. "Don't take Kinney back until you make him grovel a little, alright?" "What makes you think I'm going to take him back at all?" Justin tried to sound tough and nonchalant. "Don't pull that shit with me, I know you're in love with the guy." Ty took Justin's hand. "Just don't let him keep getting away with treating you like shit." "I won't, Ty." Justin said. Ty looked over and wasn't convinced. He made a promise to himself that, now that he was in Pittsburgh, he would keep an eye on his little cousin, When they walked into Babylon, the scene was already jumping. There were hundreds of guys dancing on the dance floor, skin gleaming with sweat and sparkles. Justin saw Brian immediately. He was at the bar with Michael, Ted, and Emmett. He was glaring at Ty having seen the two boys walk in. "Let's get a drink, shall we?" Ty said. He put his arm around Justin and led him to the bar. Justin couldn't help but feel like he had gone from being with Brian who, contrary to what everyone thought, was very protective of him, to Ty who was obviously protective of him. "Ty, I gotta go the washroom." Justin said. He saw, out of the corner of his eye, that Brian was watching. He pressed a kiss to Ty's cheek and walked away. Justin was washing his hands and fixing his hair when Brian walked into the washroom, He looked menacing under the red lights. "Gotta look perfect for you new boyfriend." Brian sounded angry. "You know how it is." Justin shrugged and tried to walk past Brian, who grabbed him arm and jerked him back to face him. "I told him to stay away from you." Brian growled. "You deserve better than that trash." Justin turned and slapped Brian in the face. Whatever Ty was, he was still family and Justin didn't have to listen to Brian insult him. "I deserve better than you, too." Justin hissed. Brian looked wounded. He realized that the way to get Justin to come back wasn't to be demanding. Justin tried to walk out again. "Justin, I..." Brian was cut off when Justin hissed, "Too little, too late, Brian." He pulled him arm away and walked out. His breathing increased and he started to panic, sure that he had just ruined his last chance. "Justin, what happened?" Emmett saw the distraught look on the boy's face. "Did he hurt you? He's been a bear since... Well, since you left." Emmett started cooing over Justin. "No, he didn't hurt me." Justin said as if he were in a trance. "I think I found the chink in his armor and hurt him." "Honey, you are the chink in his armor." Emmett said. "Anyone who knows him knows that if you want to get to Brian Kinney, go through Justin Taylor." "Why?" Justin finally looked up into Emmett's eyes. "He loves ya, kid." Emmett kissed Justin's temple. "And I think he's starting to realize it." Justin hugged Emmett quickly and with a quick "later" went to find Ty. "Let's get out of here." Justin said when he found Ty dancing with a very familiar looking man in his twenties. "The scene is cold." "Well, well, well..." The guy Ty was dancing with said. "If it isn't the boy with the yummy jambalaya." Justin finally recognized the guy as Brian's "hotlanta" trick. "Hi." Justin said uncomfortably. He could see that Ty was scoping out another guy across the dance floor and something popped into his head.. "I'm going to get going. Wanna come?" He ran his finger seductively up the trick's shirt. "You got it." The trick said with a smile. He threw his arm around Justin and they started walking away. "See you later, Ty." Justin called but Ty was already walking over to the object of his desire, a tall Asian man. Across the dance floor Brian watched Justin leave with the southern guy. He couldn't believe that now Justin was going home with the same tricks that Brian had gone with before. It was starting to scare him to see Justin out tricking, he was afraid that he had truly tarnished what was once beautiful. "Go get him!" Emmett said as he slapped Brian upside the head. "Emmett, that only happens once, next time I kick the shit out of you." Brian said through clenched teeth. Emmett wasn't intimidated in the least. "Next time I figure out what you're thinking, or next time I hit you?" Emmett asked cleverly. "Shut the fuck up." Brian said and walked away. Before he knew it he was outside the club and faced with what he wanted to see least in the world. Justin had the trick pressed up against the wall in the alley. They were kissing and pulling at each other's clothes. At that moment, seeing his baby like that, Brian made a decision. He strode over to the kissing couple and grabbed Justin by the shirt. "Get the fuck out of here." He growled at the trick, who scurried away. "What the fuck are you doing, Brian?" Justin demanded angrily. He was getting tired of Brian playing all protective and then dumping him over and over. "What, are you taking my leftovers now?" Brian demanded. He had calmed his voice from sounding furious to sounding annoyed. "Are there any fags left in Pittsburgh that you haven't fucked?" Justin asked. "Only ugly ones." Brian's voice was now much calmer. "You must be so proud." Justin said sarcastically. "And to think, I'm one of your leftovers now. The trick who stayed too long, as Michael so fondly calls me." Brian could see the hurt staining Justin's blue eyes, and he knew he hadn't lost him. Not yet, "Come back to the loft, Justin." Brian took Justin's hand and spoke gently. "I need you tonight." Justin couldn’t help it. One the rare occasions that such admissions escaped Brian's lips, he could do nothing but what Brian wanted. The ride was silent. Justin stared out the passenger side window and thought about how much had happened in only one short week. A week ago, he was living with Brian and everything felt good. Now he was living with Ty, and things were in upheaval. Brian watched the road. His whole body felt alive now that Justin was beside him again. He couldn't admit to anyone, he could barely admit it to himself, but he loved this beautiful boy, he needed him. At this moment, he felt like he would change his whole world if only he could have Justin back. "Close the door." Brian said as Justin stood at the doorway to the loft, like he had on the first night. The beautiful loft intimidated him. It really shouldn't have, since he had been living there for months until but a week ago. "Brian..." Justin started to speak after closing the door and coming into the loft, but Brian silenced him with a finger to his lips. "Don't speak." Brian whispered and lowered his mouth. He realized that the bad taste he had in his mouth for the last week wasn't something he ate. He had missed the taste of Justin's mouth more than he could say. "Mmmm..." Justin moaned as he and Brian kissed their way to the bed, the bed that had seen so many of their sexual encounters. Everything felt right when they were together. Their body's fit together perfectly; their mouths slanted just enough to meld into one. Later, as a wave of orgasm passed through Justin's body, he buried his face in the pillows and left let the tears flow. Everything felt perfect, but Justin was beginning to believe that perfection was an illusion. "Oh, Justin." Brian cried as he too felt release. He pulled Justin close and drifted off the sleep. Justin's body felt warm against his and he was determined not to let him go ever again. He smiled. Everything was right again. Justin waited for Brian's breathing to slow and even out so that he knew he was sleeping before slipping out of the bed and pulling his clothes on. He took one last look at Brian before leaving the loft silently. As he walked back to Ty's apartment, which was only a few blocks away, he thought about the weight of the decision he had just made. Brian had admitted to needing him and Justin knew that he meant more than just needing to fuck. So why had he gotten up and snuck out? Justin wasn't sure, all he knew was there was no turning back. "Baby?" Brian called when he woke up to an empty bed. He had dreamed of waking up with his Sunshine by his side. But he wasn't there. "Justin!" He called. There was silence in the loft and Brian knew that Justin was gone. He reached over to Justin's side of the bed, it was cold. He had been gone for hours. Brian waited for what had happened to sink in. He had admitted to needing Justin more than anything the previous night and Justin took that as being needed for a fuck and that alone. Brian was having a hard time admitting to himself that it was so much more than that. He needed Justin in his life, he wanted to go to sleep with him every night and wake up with him every morning. Admitting this was the hardest thing he would ever admit. I'll just have to try harder, Brian thought to himself. He leaned back against the pillows and thought back to the previous night. He thought about how Justin had felt pressed against him, how he body felt, how he tasted, how he smelled. The memories, he knew, would have to sustain him until he figured out how to get Justin back for real. And he would, he promised himself he would. And as soon as he had Justin, he would have everything he needed. "So, how was that guy last night?" Ty asked that morning as he and Justin sipped coffee before starting their prospective days. Ty was working the afternoon shift at Woody's, Saturday afternoons tended to be busy. And Justin was going out to pick up some art supplies for school and then spending the afternoon looking after Gus while Lindsay and Melanie went shopping for new furniture for Gus's bedroom. "Incredible." Justin sighed thinking about being in Brian's arms. He was so unsure of his decision to leave, because the only thing he had wanted was to spend forever in Brian's embrace. "Oh yah?" Ty asked. "It was sure quick. He came back inside." "Oh, him." Justin remembered the "hotlanta" trick and panicked. He wasn't ready to tell Ty about going home with Brian. He wanted to brood about it for a while. "I know you went home with Kinney." Ty said. "And I'm not going to say anything about it. You look like you're going to throw up anyways." Ty stood and put his cup in the sink. "Just remember, make him earn you." With that, Ty went into his bedroom and closed the door. "What if I haven't earned him?" Justin asked himself sadly. He thought of their bodies, pressed together, tangled in Brian's sheets. And he thought of Brian's whispered words, his admission that he needed Justin. And Justin wondered if it was true. Did Brian need him as much as he needed Brian, or was it really over this time? NEXT |