A Teenager's Twist on Lord of the Rings A movie by Jezable Fleetwood and Jahada (Kiasha) Rosebuds Scene 1: The death of Boromir, the escape of Frodo and Sam and the capture of Merry and Pippin. Lurtz- you will never escape the forces of evil! Borormir-Yes I will! Everyone has seen this movie before and everyone knows you shoot me and I cut your head off. Lurtz- No, um Aragorn cuts off my head after you blow your horn thing and I say he is a hobbit fancier! Boromir- Rats, hobbit fanciers get to have all the fun. Lurtz- You do not deserve to live, Mr. man of Gondor! I am better! I am number one! Boromir- Hey, that's not in the script! You're supposed to shoot me with an arrow/ (Boromir is shot) Boromir- Lucky shot, but you will never get me a second time. (Boromir is shot again) Boromir- Only one more arrow! It will miss for sure! (Take a guess at what happens) Boromir- Oh my god you shot me! Oh well, I will remain strong! Lurtz- Shut up already! Were on page 6! You are supposed to fall over and die! Boromir- What?! Gandalf practically dies, but he comes back. Sauron died, but he'll come back. Frodo almost dies twice, but he comes back twice! But me I'm just going to die! That's it! Get my agent on the phone! (Boromir storms off the stage) Lurtz- Well hey, I didn't write the script! That's just says he . Aragorn- Ha! That's my cue. ARRRRRRRRRRRRGH! (chops of Lurtz's head.) There that parts done, now what am I supposed to do? Oh yeah I will find Boromir. Boromir? Boromir? Oh no he's probably complaining to his agent, Aragorn.....away! (Runs off the stage!) (Merry and Pippin come out, swords drawn) Merry- ARGH! Hey, wait no ones here. We're supposed to come out with our swords drawn, only to be carried away by orcs, while we let Sam and Frodo escape even though at the time we don't know that Sam is going with him. Did I just say that out loud? Oh well is is now added to the script! Pippin- Hey, since no one is here do you want to check to see if the carrots are still in set 5? Merry- A good idea, my friend! let's go! (They run off the stage with Pippin thinking about carrots) (Frodo and sam are running away in the boat) Frodo- No, Sam you can't come along. It is too dangerous of a quest for you. Besides you' re afraid of boats and that is what we have to take. You can't swim, you can't cook, and all your good for is foot messages! You are a good for nothing loser! Sorry, I got overheated. Sam- Well anyway, who would want to go on a quest with little you and I am not good for nothing and this part is not in the script! Frodo- I told you I was sorry, but you can't even except an apology. Sam- Well I can, but not from you, you ,you, I ran out of things to say, but you are a horrible little critter! Frodo- Ha ha ha ha! See I am the better man after all! You Wretched bimbo can't even think of something to call me! ha ha ha! Sam- Hey, its not funny! Frodo- I bet I could beat you to the dressing room and back because you are a slowpoke! Sam - Is that a challenge?! You're on! (Frodo and Sam swim across the water and race off stage) (They come back huffing and puffing) Frodo- Ha ha! I win! I am number one and you are not, nananpoopoo! Sam- Not true you cheated! Frodo- I would never do such a thing! Sam- Yes you would! You just did! Frodo- Are you accusing me of breaking the law?! Well I never! The good-for-nothing little shrimp is accusing me of something I didn't do! Go you, you little, pig! Go! Sam- I am not allowed to go anywhere and even if I was, I wouldn't listen to you! (Hold up the Please Stand By Sign) Scene 2: Finding Merry and Pippin in Farmer Maggot's Fields (Frodo and Sam come out with black eyes and many bruises.) Sam- Hey Frodo Frodo- (really sarcastically) What Sam? Sam- Do you hear something? Frodo- No, you scared? (Merry and Pippin burst out of the crops) (All hobbits scream, Pippin leaps into Merry's arms) Merry- Get off of me! (Drops Pippin) Pippin- owwwwwwwwwww! Watch it! Frodo- Just a Took and a Brandybuck! What were you getting scared over them for, Sam? Sam- I was not scared! Frodo- Were too! Sam- Was not! (Frodo punches Sam, hold up please stand by again) (Pippin cries) Merry- on Pippin, don't cry, the fight isn't all that bad, and besides, i'm not on anyone's side. COME on FRODO, you can beat him. Left! Right! Left! Pippin- It's not the fight! Merry- Then what is it? (continues cheering) Pippin- I just can't belive that they took the carrots out of scene 5! I miss the carrots. Merry- How can you think of your stomach at a time like this? Pippin- How can I not think about my stomach when I'm hungry? Merry- Then go get some lunch, I'm going to stay and watch the match. Yeah Frodo! Pippin- Well than, more for me. See you all later! (Pippin leaves. Fight begins again, Merry is shoutin for Frodo) Continued on Page Three of the Tolkien Times..... |