---------- Jake Mackinon vs. Diamond Sledge -------------
Dean: Hi everybody and welcome to MY show, were I should be on the main
event again, but GZW have asked that other commentary team to do it.. whatever
there called.... grrrrr. anyway who cares about them? fans I guess you’ll just
have to get all of me you can early on this week!
Will: anyway tonight we have an action packed night with the stwange
teaming of Basiwdon Bond & Maxx Pain, taking on the even stwanger
combination of T-Wex & Big Countwy, who just for the wecord used to be best
of buddies in EWO at one time!
Dean: yea why would the booking commity force a great person like Big C
team with a waster like T-Rex is beyond me!
(“Mr Writer” by the Stereophonics begins to play on the PA system Epic
and Eclipse begin to make there way down the ramp way, and are greeted by a
chorus of boos from the crowd, they make there way around the ring, and sit
down on two empty chairs by Will and Dean)
Dean: what do we offer you two great sportsmen here at ringside!
Epic: we just wanted to get a closer view of some of the other
competition in GZW, and enjoy watching Diamond Sledge, get his arse kicked at
the same time!
Eclipse: yea and as always we are always looking to see what great
competition Money Can Buy, and Jake might just have what it takes.
Will: what makes you so sure that Diamond will get his arse kicked
anyway? He was once a tag-team champion with you Epic so you know just how
competitive he is anyway!
Epic: I know he was a waste of space then, and he’s a waste of space
now! I could have won them two titles on my own, but now the competition in
that division so I have gone and found myself a worthy partner in Eclipse.
Dean: yea and you guys are number one contenders now!
Eclipse: exactly, and Diamond isn’t!
(“Funky Cold Medina” by Tone Loc begins to play on the PA system, and
at the top of the ramp way emerges Diamond who is greeted by the fans with
tremendous roar, he walks down to the ring, and points at Epic who is sat at
the commentary table)
Epic: concentrate on your match
Dean: yea who does he think he is? Epic you should kick his ass
Will: *cough* Suck-up *cough*
Eclipse (staring at Will) What was that Will?
(“Tattered and Torn” by Slipknot now begins to play on the PA system,
he walks down the ramp way being met by a mixed reaction from the fans)
Dean: this new guy hasn’t been around here so long!
Epic: that’s the reason we are here!
Eclipse: yea as I said earlier we are always looking for talent to add
to our already great team, and Jake might just have that!
(Diamond is still pointing at Epic, and Eclipse at ringside, and Jake
takes advantage, by knocking him to the floor with a couple of blows to his
back before sending him into the ropes)
Eclipse: you see we don’t want Diamond on our team he’s far too easily
distracted, and he doesn’t concentrate on the job in hand enough.
Epic: and that’s why I got rid of his, like a bag of trash.
Will: give the poor guy a break!
Epic: shut it or I make you as ugly as Diamond!
(Diamond comes off the ropes, and knocks Jake onto the canvas with a
spinning heel kick, he stops and points at Epic again and yells “GET YOUR
SCRAWNY ASS INTO THE RING”, the fans cheer for a minute, but Epic shows him a V
sign, and Diamond puts his attention back onto Jake)
Epic: bloody moron doesn’t want a piece of me.
Will: didn’t sound wike that to me!
Eclipse: then maybe you should get your ears tested Willy!
Dean: I have been telling him that since my first day of colour
commentary.
(Diamond picks Jake up, and drops a knee to the face of Jake, and then
takes him down with a snapmare)
Will: Nice move by Diamond there!
Epic: well it’s not as great as me or Eclipse would have made it look,
but it worked, pity he did nothing like that when I had to team with him.
Eclipse: and I just thank god I never had to team with him!
Dean: me too.
(Jake begins to get to his feet, and Diamond has managed to get Jake
into a sleeperhold, and Jakes gets up to his feet, and hits a jawbreaker)
Epic: yea we all knew Diamond wouldn’t keep the advantage! He never
does!
Eclipse: tell me about it!
Dean: yea I know I watch him lots, and he never does anything good, I
mean the peacekeepers are a bunch of wasters but even for them he’s BAD!
Epic: BAD?...... he’s god damn awful!
(Jake know gets to his feet, as Diamond lies on his back, Jake talks
trash to him, as he begins to stomp away on Diamond)
Eclipse: that’s it Jake keeps his arse down; show him that all the new
guys can beat his arse!
Epic: hey I could have told you that Eclipse!
Dean: well with the exception of that Yiroshi Takenbu!
Epic & Eclipse: who?
Will: he’s in the main event tonight against Magic!
(Jake picks up Diamond, and goes to pick him up, he gets him onto his
shoulder and begins to run with Diamond, but Diamond slides down the back, and
pushes Jake into the corner, and rolls him up in a small package)
E&E: I’m fed up with this, we are waaaaaaay better than most of the
suposeurbed talent around here, and a new era moron gets a main event!
ONE.....
Dean: bloody awful, and mr Lucky Magic how the hell does he keep
getting main events? He’s pathetic!
TWO.........
Eclipse: compared to us he is!
THREE.........
Will: no kickout by Jake!
Dean: what?
Will: I wish you guy’s wouwd concenwate on the match for once!
Dean: why it’s boring
Epic: every match with Diamond in, is usual boring, unless its one of
us who just beat the crap out of him
Eclipse: now that’s entertainment!
(Diamond, is first to his feet, quickly followed by Jake, Diamond drops
him with a neckbreaker, and again comes to the ropes, and shouts “YOU BETTER
STAY OUT OF THIS”)
Epic: Eclipse would we interfere?
Eclipse: no, not us we are too innocent for tricks, and stunts like
that!
Will: I hope you do stay out, and mind your own business!
Dean: don’t tempt them Will!
(Diamond turns around, and gets kicked in the mid section and
hits............)
Dean: LONDON BRIDGES!
(Jake makes the cover)
ONE.......
Epic: well its over now, and we didn’t even need to get involved anyway
TWO.........
Eclipse: I guess we didn’t get to see too much of this Jake guy!
THREE......
Will: no Diamonds kicked out!
Epic: damn.......
Eclipse: it must have been that epileptic fits thingy you were telling
me about Epic!
Dean: yea must have been there is no other way he could have kicked
out!
Will: either way the match continues!
(Jake is quickly up to his feet, and looks miffed, and is quickly back
on top of Diamond, laying in some mounted punches)
Epic: that’s it make sure he can’t even move next time!
Eclipse: yea like we would!
Will: weww Jake is on top in this match now, and Diamond may have
kicked out but he sure as hell is getting a beating!
(Jake picks up Diamond again, and drops him with an atomic drop, and
Diamond collapses to the apron, as Jake points towards the turnbuckle)
Dean: looks like Jake is going for DaRksiDe
Epic: and then we can go and get a brew Eclipse!
Eclipse: yea I could do with one too!
(Jake climbs the turnbuckle, and dives off indeed looking for DaRksiDe,
but Diamond moves, and then rolls back to make a cover)
ONE.........
Epic: no this can’t happen
TWO.......
Will: Diamond couwd puww it out here!
THREE......
Eclipse: phew foot on the ropes!
Dean: that was too close
Epic & Eclipse: you’re right
(Epic and Eclipse leave the commentary position, and get up on the
apron, and then yell at the crowd, as the crowd begins to boo)
Will: I thought they weren’t getting involved!
Dean: there so damn good they can do what they like
(Diamond and Jake are quickly up though, and begin to exchange blows,
as Epic and Eclipse continue to hurl abuse at the crowd)
Will: I just hope they don’t get involved!
Dean: and I hope they do!
(Diamond whips Jake into the ropes, and knocks Epic off the apron,
Eclipse notices this, and goes to help his friend, Jake looks a bit dazed, as
his head hit Epics, and Diamond hits......)
Will: that’s Diamonds are forever (Final Cut/ Eye of the Hurricane)
(Diamond makes the cover)
ONE.....
Dean: noooooo
TWO........
Will: he could have stolen it here!
THREE......
(Ding, Ding)
Dean: how the hell did he win?
Will: I guess Epic’s, and Eclipses plan just backfired
(Epic and Eclipse look astonished as they look in the ring, and see
Diamond making a quick exit)
---------------- Commercial ---------------
*GZW Extreme Championship*
---Tag-Team Match---
---Adam Cage ( ½ ©) & Pitfighter ( ½ ©) vs. Dameon and Hades---
Pitfighter’s music suddenly blasts through the speakers as one-half of
the Extreme championship steps into view at the top of the ramp. Pit has the title over his shoulder, looking
at it with pride as he walks down the ramp and to the ring. He rolls in and goes for the turnbuckle. He stands on it and holds the championship
above his head.
Will: Weww, I can’t wait to see
if this match will go well ow not.
Dean: Please, Pit and Cage
couldn’t team together if their title depended on it, which it does. And Hades and Dameon might have to turn
against each other here too! That might
cause something.
Will: Twue, but Dameon and Hades
are used to teaming together and they know what to do.
Linkin Park’s “One Step Closer” hits and Adam Cage comes walking down
to the ring with a steel chair in his hand.
He runs down to the ring and slides in.
He gets face to face with Pit as they exchange words. Adam lays his chair on the ground. The camera zooms to it as it shows letter
spray painted on it. It states “GZW
Extreme Championship”.
Dean: He doesn’t have the title
so he has to make the chair say it!
Will: Weww, if he uses that
chaiw he wiww pwobabwy end up full Extweme champion.
Dean: But he could lose it to
either Dameon or Hades and that means only one man will step away with the
championship!
“Break Ya Neck” by Busta Rhymes plays through the PA system as the fans
give a huge pop to the Fierys. Dameon
and Hades both step out from behind the curtain. Blue and red lights flash around the arena, some mixing to be
purple. The two walk down the ramp and
climb into the ring. They pose for
pictures and the camera flash around the ring.
Adam Cage and Pitfighter look at each other and knob, and then charge at
their opponents. Dameon and Hades make
a quick turn and spray something from their mouth. Red mist from Dameon’s mouth flies out at Adam Cage and blue mist
flies from Hades’ mouth at Pit’s face.
Dean: Dameon and Hades doing
Fire Extinguisher (Red mist; in Hades case it is blue)
Will: This couwd go good for
the fathew son team.
Dameon and Hades beat down their opponents as the ref calls for the
bell. Hades picks up Pit and throws him
out of the ring and goes out with him.
Dameon on the other hand continues to pummel the head of Cage. Dameon then slows down and gets off of Cage. He picks up Cage and tosses him into the
turnbuckle and follows with a trapping clothesline. Cage staggers around the ring but gets hit with another
clothesline from Dameon. The crowd
cheers and starts to calm down. On the
outside Hades lifts Pit above his head, then drops him on a barricade. He lays a few kicks to his side, then leaves
him there and rolls into the ring with Dameon.
The two pick up Adam and whip him across the ropes. Once he comes back the two go for a double
clothesline, but Cage ducks it. Dameon
and Hades turn around, but only to be knocked down with a clothesline from AC. Pit is now regaining strength outside and
gets to his feet. He then searches
under the ring and pulls out a few trashcans and their lids, a kendo stick, a
steel chair and a stop sign.
Will: Wooks wike Pit wants to
end this one eawwy!
Dean: I would too. This is an extreme rules match, and there is
no telling what could happen!
Dameon and Hades are now getting up as Pit rolls inside the ring. Pit and Adam grab Dameon by his hair and
hook his arms. The lift him high in the
air with a double suplex, shaking the ring after the impact. Hades is now up and runs at the two. Once they turn around Hades hits a dropkick,
hitting both of them. This doesn’t have
much of an effect on the two. They wait
for Hades to get back up and kick him in the mid-section. Dameon is now getting back to his feet, but
not in time to save Hades after he is drilled into the mat with a double
DDT. Dameon sneaks up from behind Cage,
trashcan in hand. He lifts the can up,
and then slams it over his head. The
sound echoes through the arena as the fans “oooooooh” at the impact. Cage falls to his knees then lays out in the
center of the ring. Pit lays a few
punches to Dameon, which makes him release the trashcan. Pit then tosses Dameon to ringside and goes
to the weak Hades for the pin.
One…
Two…
Kickout
Dean: I have a feeling we are
going to be here for a while.
Dameon slides in the ring and goes for Pit. Adam Cage sneaks up from behind Dameon and places a sleeper hold
on him. Dameon continues to chase Pit
with AC clamped on his back. Dameon
then gets a frustrated face and lands right on his back, squashing Adam. Dameon then sits up quickly but is met by a
few punches from Pit. Dameon blocks one
and hits an enormous head butt on Pit.
Pit stagers around for a while and goes to punch Dameon again, but
Dameon blocks it and knocks him down with a thunderous uppercut. Pit looks up in amazement and gets to his
feet. AC is now back up and goes to hit
Dameon down from behind but Hades is now back up and grabs AC down before he
could make contact. Pit runs at Dameon,
but is caught in a gorilla press.
Dameon then tosses him outside of the ring on the hard ground. Hades now has Adam in his grasps. Dameon walks over as the two whip AC across
the ring. He comes bouncing back off
the ropes and they hit Spinical (Double spinebuster) Dameon goes for a pin but
Hades taps him on the shoulder and points to the something outside of the
ring. Dameon knobs and grins wickedly. Hades goes out of the ring and grabs two
chairs. The gets back in the ring and
gives one to Dameon.
Will: Uh oh! Dameon and Hades could be wooking fow
Headache (Con-Chair-To)!
Dean: But who is gonna pin him?
AC gets to his feet slowly between Dameon and Hades. The two hold up their chairs, then swing but
Pit pushes AC out of the way. Pit gets
caught between the two chairs and gets busted open by the Headache! Dameon and Hades then aim their chairs to
hit AC, but he elevates off the ground and dropkicks the chairs in their own
faces. Dameon and Hades go down in an
instant. AC then goes to ringside and
searches under the ring. He pulls out a
big wooden table and slides it into the ring.
AC sets it up and looks around the arena and taunts the crowd. Hades is the first to his feet and is hit in
the back by AC. Adam waists no time and
puts Hades’ head between his leg right in front of the table. He lifts up Hades on his shoulders but
Dameon hits a low-blow leaving Adam no choice but to drop Hades down. Hades runs to the other side of the ring as
Dameon holds Adam from behind. Hades
then charges at Adam and leaps off the ground to hit Crash-n-Burn (Spear) but
AC moves out of the way. Hades knocks
down Dameon with the impacted move.
Dean: Dameon will be feeling
that one later on!
Will: It might wook wike a
pwobwem aftew he finds out.
Dean: That’s the only good part
of it.
AC then waits for Hades to get back up, and as soon as he does he kicks
him in the mid-section and plants him with Nova (Evenflow DDT)! He goes for a pin…
One…
Two…
Thre…
Dameon interrupts the count!
Pit is now back to his feet, wobbling around the ring. Dameon goes right for him. A few punches are connected to Pit’s head,
but AC is now behind Dameon. AC returns
the favour from earlier and low blows Dameon.
Pit tosses Dameon against the ropes and once he bounces back he lifts
him over his head. AC catches Dameon’s
head as they hit a Conquest (GZW’s version of 3-D!!!) AC is first to his feet but Pit is still struggling. AC picks up a chair, which was in the middle
of the ring earlier in the match. AC
hits Hades over the head once he gets to his feet. Pit gets to his feet but AC takes the chair and connects it with
Pit’s head! Pit falls on top of Dameon
and Cage pins Hades as the ref makes a double count…
One…
Two…
Three!!!
Dean: And these two retain
their title! Even though they don’t get
along they make a pretty good team.
Will: If youw wooking fow a
cast on Odd Coupwe!
Dameon is back to his feet as he sees AC celebrating with his
championship. He looks at the man with
anger. AC climbs up on the ropes while
Dameon sneaks up from behind him and knocks him down. Dameon climbs up on the turnbuckle facing the inside of the ring. He places Adam between his legs and picks
him up as if to do a piledriver. He jumps
off the turnbuckle with Adam still in the piledriver position then drills him
through the table, which was still unbroken, with Cremator (Hangman’s
DDT)!!! Dameon stands back up and rolls
out of the ring. Hades follows,
struggling up the ramp. The two look at
the carnage in the ring. Refs and EMT’s
come down to the ring and check on Adam Cage and Pit. Dameon grins evilly as he sees the damage he created. Hades looks at his face with confusion. Dameon walks to the back as Hades stands
there holding his head. Hades follows
moments after. The commercial cuts to a
break showing AC and Pit unconscious in the ring.
---Commercial Break---
*Number 1 Contender to Light-Heavyweight Title Match*
---Desecrator vs. El Gambit---
Dean: Here we go! Desecrator
against the man of all Spanish men, El Gambit!
Will: Weww wets get to the action.
“Its Been A While” by Staind begins
to play over the PA and out walks Desecrator. He is half way down the ramp when
El Gambit comes running down the ramp behind him and hits Desecrator with a
clothesline. Des begins to roll down the entrance ramp as Gambit leaps over him
running down to ring side. Gambit stops at ringside and waits for
Desecrator. Gambit picks Des up and
throws him into the ring. The Ref signals for the match to begin. Gambit begins
hitting him with stiff left hands. Gambit hits a timely dropkick sending Des
into the Turnbuckle. Gambit continues the endless assault by kicking Des down
to the mat. Gambit picks up Des and smacks his head against the turnbuckle. He repeats this again by slamming his head
again and smacks it against the turnbuckle. Des falls to the mat holding his
head. Gambit sits on top the turnbuckle and attempts to hit an elbow drop from
the second turnbuckle. Desecrator rolls out of the way just before Gambit can
connect with the elbow drop. Des quickly gets up and he begins to stomp on his
opponent. He picks up Gambit and kicks him in the gut, and then Des connects
with a hefty DDT.
Will: This match has been wather back
and fowth so far.
Dean: The match just started!
We still have time to see Desecrator see El Gambits Fifth Dimension!
Des goes for the quick pin attempt…
One…
Two…
Kickout
Des begins to stomp on Gambit some
more. He picks up Gambit and locks him up in a grapple. Des sends Gambit at the
ropes and he hits him with a quick arm drag takedown. The twp quickly get up but Des hits Gambit with another speedy
arm drag takedown. They quickly get up again but this time Gambit scores with a
quick arm drag. Desecrator gets up
quicker this time and he nails Gambit with stiff left hand. Then another and
another! Des has Gambit reeling. Des
connects with a hefty drop kick that sends Gambit flying out of the ring. Des stands there waiting for his opponent to
get up. He does and Des charges, leaps
out of the ring and hits Gambit with a front flip suicide dive! They’re both lying there with little motion.
The ref begins to count...
One…
Two…
Three…
Four…
Five…
Gambit and Des both struggle up at
about the same time
Six…
Seven…
Eight…
Des gets up and throws Gambit into
the ring and follows closely behind.
Gambit is already up and he kicks Desecrator heavily in the head. The
ref warns Gambit to lay off. Gambit pushes the ref out of his way. The ref
begins yelling at him, but from behind Des turns Gambit around and knees him in
the gut. Then he grabs Gambit’s head and hits a European Uppercut that sends
him reeling into the turnbuckle. Des
goes to the turnbuckle across from Gambit and he charges at him. Des then runs and jumps with a Turnbuckle
Splash.
Will: Desecwatow continuing his momentum.
Dean: Yeah this one could be over very soon here.
Will: Wooks wike Des has this match in his gwasps.
Desecrator picks up Gambit and hits
him with a vicious clothesline. He
quickly goes for the pin...
One…
Two…
Thre…
Des kicks out moments after the three
count! Des rams his fist into the mat.
He begins to yell at the ref holding 3 fingers in the air but the ref is just
shaking his head. He grabs Gambit by the head and he begins to ram it into the
mat, again and again. Gambit is now
holding his head. Des picks up Gambit
and whips him into the ropes. Des begins running at the ropes opposite of
Gambit. They are heading right at each other.
Des tries a flying clothesline but Gambit ducks it. He turns around and
picks up Des. He grabs him in a massive chokehold. Then SMACK!! Gambit hit’s Des with an Inseguri. He picks
up Des and holds him in a front headlock. Gambit then jumps, spins and plants
Desecrator’s head with a tornado DDT! He then begins stomping on Des using the
ropes for extra leverage. Gambit begins to choke Des with his foot. The ref
starts to count…
One…
Two…
Three…
Four… Fiv…
Gambit breaks the hold just before
the five count, but right away he goes back to choking Desecrator. This time
the ref pulls Gambit off of Des. He picks up his opponent and tosses him into
the turnbuckle. Gambit now begins to beat Des with body shots. He kicks him right in the gut, and then he
knee's him in the gut. Gambit grabs Des
and hits him with a nasty head butt.
Des has been opened up after this. Gambit sets up Des and he hits a
massive Piledriver. Gambit goes up top.
He taunts the crowd. He jumps then hits Gibralarsault
(A la Rios Moonsault)!!!
Dean: It is over! I doubt
Desecrator could kick out of that!
Will: It does wook as if it is ovew, but don’t give up hope just yet.
Dean: I would rather give up hope Will.
He quickly goes for the pin...
One…
Two…
Three… No Kickout!!!
Gambit doesn’t know what just
happened. Des just kicked out of his trademark maneuver.
Will: WOW, Desecrator has just kicked out of Gibralarsault!!!
Dean: He should have stayed down!
What an idiotic move!
Gambit picks up Desecrator suddenly
rolls Gambit up in a schoolboy. He
holds his tights as the ref counts…
One…
Two…
Three…
Ding Ding Ding!!!
Dean: No!!! Gambit lost to a
cheap move. Now Desecrator is the #1
contender for the lightweight championship!
Will: His own stwategy tuwned against him!
Dean: The first ever Lightweight champion became one of the most
annoying superstars of all time! Could
Desecrator become a new generation version of Magic!?
Will: He hasn’t even won the title yet!
Dean: That’s one good thing.
Desecrator rolls out of the ring
quickly as Gambit stands in the ring looking at him and stomping in the
ring. Desecrator then smile and walks
back up the ramp. Gambit then grins and
runs up the ramp and takes Desecrator down from behind! Gambit picks up his nemesis and hits him
with Rock of Gibraltar DDT (A
Reverse Implant DDT; gets opponent in a reverse DDT position, grab their tights
and lift them up, then spike then with a reverse DDT with their feet off the
ground) right on the steel ramp.
Dean: That’s how the match should have ended, with that move finishing
Desecrator off!
Will: Gambit is just a sowe losew, nough said!
Dean: No, he took his loss like a man, but he made Desecrator pay for the cheap way out of the match.
Will: Whatevew! Gambit still loss so I guess Desecrator has
something to celebrate!
(the scene opens up with K-9 sat in the boot of a car, he is grinning at the
camera, as a GZW logo in the bottom left hand corner fades)
voiceover: would you like to save money on your insurance?
K-9: OH YES
Voiceover: and are you going to be watching the GZW pay-per view
extravaganza Acceptable Risks?
K-9: OH YES
Voiceover: but do you intend on risking your career?
K-9: OH NO NO NO NO NO
(another voiceover comes in)
Voiceover: GZW Acceptable Risks Pay-per-view the insurance Policy for
entertainment
-------------- Backstage -------------
(Pimp and Dean, are walking down a hallway backstage, a phone begins to
beep, and Pimps pocket begins to vibrate, he pulls a mobile phone out of his
pocket, and then smiles as he looks at the screen)
Dean: your pocket….. It’s vibrating! I bet you like that
Pimp: hey shut up Dean, My name isn’t Maxxine, she’ll grab hold of anything
that vibrates and you know that Dean!
(They both go silent for a minute or so)
Pimp the art of text messages…….. Wish I’d thought of this earlier!
(Scene fades to black)
**Maxx Pain and Bazildon Bond vs. T-Rex and Big Country**
[*”My Way” by Limp Bizkit kicks in as Maxx Pain and Baz make there way
down the ramp to a decent face pop.
Maxx climbs over the top rope as Baz slides in under the bottom rope as
the music fades out.*]
[*”I Am Number One!!!” echoes around the arena as the fans erupt to see
T-Rex make his way down the ramp to the tune of “Number One” by Nelly. Pyros ignite as he slides into the ring and
eyes Maxx Pain.*]
Billy: There’s no love loss between Maxx and Rex.
Jennifer: There’s no love loss between Rex and Big C.
Billy: Rex don’t love anyone.
[*“Off The Wall” by Eminem and Redman kicks in as the crowd erupts in
boos for Big Country. He gives the
crowd the one finger salute before sliding into the ring and begins trash
talking to Maxx.*]
Billy: This was not a smart match to book. Big C, Maxx, and T-Rex all hate each other.
Jennifer: I don’t know Billy it may be a smart move.
[Rex and Big C argue in the corner over who should start off first as
Maxx and Baz look on and begin to laugh.
The two walk over and closeline both men over the top rope. Rex slides back into the ring and closelines
both men to the ground as Big C gets up on the apron.]
Billy: Well looks like Rex got his way.
[Rex lifts Maxx up and whips him across the ring into the corner. He charges in and delivers a massive
closeline. Big C reaches out and tags
himself in as Rex lays in the kicks to Maxx’s ribs. Big C steps in and begins to stomp away on Maxx as the ref pushes
Rex out of the ring. He looks at the
ref and argues that he wasn’t finished but the ref won’t hear it.]
Billy: This should be interesting.
[Big C lifts Maxx up and whips him across the ring into his corner and
charges in nailing both Baz and Maxx with a thunderous closeline. Baz flies off the apron and onto the hard
floor as Maxx slumps down in the corner.
Big C climbs up to the second rope and begins to celebrate as Maxx turns
around behind Country and nails him with a low blow knocking him off the
turnbuckle. He rolls him up and places
both feet on the rope.]
One
Two
[Baz pushes Maxx’s feet off the ropes allowing Country to kick out at
the last second. Maxx looks over at him
with a “Why?” look on his face. Baz
yells something at him as Country makes his way over to Rex and tags him
in. Rex charges in and nails Maxx with
a closeline. He mounts the fallen man
and pounds away on the upper area of the head with stiff right hands. Baz climbs into the ring and tries to pull
Rex off but he just pushes him off and onto the mat. He climbs off and hooks the leg as the ref slides into position.]
One
Two
[Baz charges in and breaks up the count before the ref hits three. The ref begins to escort Baz out as Big C
charges in and closelines the ref in the back of the head knocking him into Baz
and causing both men to fall out of the ring.]
Jennifer: That was intentional I think.
Billy: Wow you’re the master of the obvious aren’t you?
Jennifer: Bite me.
Billy: With pleasure.
Jennifer: As if.
[Country slides out of the ring and grabs a steel chair. He slides back into the ring and slams the
chair on the ground as Maxx gets to his feet.
He spins around and Country takes him right back down to the ground with
a massive chair shot busting him open.
Rex gets up and looks at Country and yells something at him but Country
has none of it and nails Rex in the face busting him open and leaving a major
dent in the chair. Baz climbs in and
goes for a low blow but Country sees this and brings the chair down on the back
of Baz’s head knocking him out. Country
throws the chair out of the ring and drags Baz’s limp body over the top of
Rex’s bloody body. He walks over and
drags the ref over and tells him to make the count as he mounts Maxx’s body and
pounds away on his face.]
Jennifer: Oh come on ref.
One
**slow count**
Billy: I don’t agree with this at all.
Two
Jennifer: Kickout!!
Three!!
Billy: How humiliating to be pinned by the cameraman.
[The ref raises Baz’s hand as Country rolls out of the ring with a sick
smile on his face. Baz grabs the back
of his head as he looks down at the carnage and back up at Country who is
standing on the ramp smiling.]
Billy: That has to be embarrassing
Jennifer: Baz is a great competitor.
Billy: Yea but he’s the damn cameraman everyone likes to pick on.
Jennifer: Shut up Billy.
**Commercial Break**
~~~ MAIN EVENT ~~~
~~~~ “The Sleepwalker” Yiroshi Takenbu V “The Desert Storm” Magic ~~~~
Siu Ann Wong:
“Welcome back to Travesty, wrestling fans! I’m Siu Ann Wong, and with
me is…”
Jackie Lee:
“Jackie Lee… konich…”
Siu Ann:
“Good evening!”
Jackie:
“Hey I was about to say konich…”
Siu Ann:
“What a main event we have, eh Jackie?”
Jackie:
“This is gonna be a great main event, simply because Jackie Lee, and
whatever your name is sweetheart, are commentating! Hey Dean! Who’s doing the
main event this week? Yeah! The REAL main event commentators! Someday you’ll
realise that I AM the ONLY colour sports entertainment announcer!”
Siu Ann:
“You should leave Dean alone, Jackie! After all, he gives Basildon Bond
a run for his money!”
Jackie:
“Basildon is a talent less cameraman Siu Ann! My nan could kick his
ass!”
Siu Ann:
“Well once Dean and Baz have beaten each other senseless, maybe one of
them might consider beating on your backside!”
Before any more Siu Ann and Jackie bickering can happen, “The Heretic
Anthem” by Slipknot hits the PA. Yiroshi Takenbu comes onto the zerotron, and
there is an equal amount of boos and cheers for the mysterious representative
of the new age. Yiroshi quickly heads to the ring.
Siu Ann:
“I hope that this will be a fair match! It’s so nice to commentate on a
normal, pin fall match! Hopefully the best man will win!”
Jackie:
“HOW can a main event not involve ‘extremeness’, tables, ladders, or
anything like that? HOW can a main event be so damned pussy?!?”
Siu Ann:
“Shut up Jackie! We’re not in HKWF now!”
“Bittersweet” by Fuel hits the PA, and the crowd erupt!
Siu Ann:
“Listen to the ovation for Magic!”
Jackie:
“El Gambit was right! Magic is such a has been! I think he should REST…
IN… PEACE!”
Magic appears on the zerotron and the crowd cheer for the
ex-heavyweight champ as he makes his way to the ring. Halfway to the ring he
glares at Yiroshi, who glares right back. Magic smirks, and then shows Yiroshi
the middle finger! He then heads towards the ring, and gets in as the ref hold
back an angry Yiroshi.
Siu Ann:
“Magic showing Yiroshi what he thinks of the new age!”
Jackie:
“And he’s right!”
The ref lets go of Yiroshi who immediately charges at Magic for a
spear. Magic easily predicts this and sidesteps Yiroshi, grabbing his head and
using his momentum to drop him with a high impact bulldog! Magic goes straight
for the cover!
Siu Ann:
“Owy, owy, ow! Yiroshi pays heavily for his rashness! That was a hell
of a bulldog by Magic! It could be over, right here!”
1…
2…
KICKOUT!
Siu Ann:
“That was close, but Yiroshi is a fighter!”
Jackie:
“Replace ‘fight’ with ‘lose’ and that’s what Takenbu is!”
Magic pulls up Yiroshi, and sets him up into a powerbomb position.
Jackie:
“We could see Yiroshi go to his Final Destination, right here!”
Siu Ann:
“Surely not so soon?”
Yiroshi powers out with a back body drop. Magic leaps up, but gets a
boot to the stomach from Yiroshi. Yiroshi flips over the doubled over Magic,
pulls him into a full nelson, and smashes Magic’s head and shoulders off the
mat with a release dragon suplex!
Siu Ann:
“Owy, owy, ow! Yiroshi calls that a roshi plex omega!”
Jackie:
“Most normal people would call that a dragon suplex!”
With Magic floored, Yiroshi immediately heads over and proceeds to drop
numerous knees to Magic’s back. He pulls up Magic and goes for a right hand…
which is blocked…
Jackie:
“When will these new age punks learn not to telegraph their moves?”
Magic steams back with four left jabs that rock Takenbu, and then he
sends Yiroshi reeling with a huge uppercut!
Siu Ann:
“Wow! Nice combination by Magic: he calls that ‘five star punches’!”
Yiroshi, a little punch drunk staggers back towards Magic, and gets a
big dropkick that sends him down to the mat. He gets up again and runs at
Magic, only to be hip tossed across the ring.
Siu Ann:
“Magic is capitalising on Yiroshi’s anger, here!”
Magic ducks a left hook from Yiroshi and knees him in the stomach. He
then Irish whips Yiroshi, who on his return gets a jumping big boot right in
the face!
Siu Ann:
“Goodness gracious! The impact of that big boot!”
Magic goes for the cover.
1…
2…
Jackie:
“Magic’s gonna beat this new age punk!”
Kickout!
Jackie:
“Ah well, he’ll just have to beat on him some more!”
Magic pulls up Yiroshi with a determined look on his face, and grabs
him into a vicious bear hug. He violently throws the agonised Yiroshi around like
a rag doll, and unceremoniously dumps him to the floor.
Siu Ann:
“Aggravated Assault bear hug! That the set-up for…”
Jackie:
“Yiroshi is about to go to his final destination!”
Magic pulls up Yiroshi high above his head and sends the prone Yiroshi
crashing to the floor with a Final Destination (Razor’s Edge)!
Siu Ann:
“Final Destination! It’s over!”
1…
Jackie:
“No-one kicks out of a Final Destination!”
2…
Siu Ann:
“You’re right about that, Jackie!”
3… NO! Yiroshi’s foot is on the bottom rope, and the ref calls for
Magic to break the pin!
Jackie:
“Takenbu is SO damned lucky!”
Magic is angry, and yanks Yiroshi away from the ropes. He picks him up
and scoop slams him with authority! He then climbs the turnbuckles!
Jackie:
“Here we go! Abracadabra! It’s Magic, and Yiroshi’s career vanishes!”
Magic flies off the top rope with a picture perfect big elbow drop (a
la Shawn Michaels)… that hits nothing but canvas. Yiroshi rolls out of the way
at the last minute!
Siu Ann:
“Magic took the high risk elbow drop to finish off Yiroshi, and it
didn’t pay off! But can Yiroshi capitalise?”
Both men are down, and the ref starts the ten count. He gets up to
seven before Yiroshi is on his feet, Magic isn’t far behind… but is immediately
taken back down with a big time spear!
Siu Ann:
“Yiroshi on the offensive!”
Yiroshi pulls up Magic, and immediately slams him back down with a
beautiful belly-to-belly suplex!
Siu Ann:
“Roshi plex, right there! Nicely executed!”
Yiroshi pulls him up again, hitting another roshi plex, then another,
then another, then another!
Siu Ann:
“Goodness gracious! Five consecutive roshi plexes!”
Yiroshi goes for the cover.
1…
Siu Ann:
“Yiroshi may well have it here after those roshi plexes!”
2…
Jackie:
“Over a wuss like Magic, I reckon so!”
Kickout!
Siu Ann:
“Kickout my Magic! Jackie, you were cheering him a minute ago!”
Jackie:
“Well that was ‘cos he was winning! But we all know that the new age is
going to usurp Magic at the top. Magic is a has been like my man El Gambit
says!”
Magic isn’t getting up, so Yiroshi pulls him up starts brutally sending
knee after knee into Magic’s face!
Siu Ann:
“Takenbu Rush! Yiroshi is really taking it to Magic, and all it took
was one missed elbow drop, and now Magic is in real trouble!”
As Yiroshi continues to brutalise Magic, a man in a hockey mask and a
long raincoat climbs over the guardrail.
Jackie:
“Who the hell is that?”
Siu Ann:
“Where is security?”
As the masked man looks on, Yiroshi finally stops kneeing Magic, and
then stands him up. Magic is punch drunk from the Takenbu Rush, and is easy
pickings for a…
Siu Ann:
“Disasterpiece! Yiroshi with the disasterpiece!”
Yiroshi has indeed hit his jumping, spinning heel kick finisher,
hitting Magic right in the throat sending him crashing down to the mat! He
dives for the cover.
1…
Siu Ann:
“I can’t believe it! Yiroshi Takenbu is going to beat Magic!”
2…
Jackie:
“You’d better believe it! This IS the new age!”
The ref goes to hit the three, but Yiroshi is taken out with a beautiful,
swan dive flying head butt (a la Chris Benoit) of the top ropes from a man in a
trench coat!
Siu Ann:
“What the hell? Who IS that!”
The man grabs the ref and chokeslams him to the mat before he can call
for the disqualification!
Siu Ann:
“Goodness gracious! Deliberately hitting a ref, that’s heinous!”
Jackie:
“Whoever this guy is, I like him!”
Yiroshi is up, but is soon back down from a clothesline from the masked
man. With Yiroshi down he tears off the mask and the trench coat.
Siu Ann:
“Goodness gracious! It can’t be! That’s… that’s…”
Jackie:
“I don’t believe it! That’s Union Jack! Union f*bleep*ing Jack!”
Siu Ann:
“Goodness, goodness gracious! Union Jack! Union Jack back in GZW!”
Jack grabs Yiroshi, puts his head between his legs, and hits a double
arm faceplant to the new age member.
Siu Ann:
“Jack Hammer (Pedigree) to Yiroshi!”
Jack pulls up Magic, and he too gets a Jack Hammer!
Siu Ann:
“Jack Hammer to Magic! Union Jack has brutalised both Magic and Yiroshi
Takenbu!”
Jackie:
“Welcome back Jack! The British Butcher is back, and look at how
expertly he’s doing his work!”
Jack slides out the ring, and grabs a steel chair. Yiroshi is on one
knee when Jack gets back in the ring, and Jack viciously swings a roundhouse
with the chair smashing Yiroshi right in the face. Yiroshi flies back: out cold
from the brutal direct hit!
Siu Ann:
“Goodness, goodness gracious!”
Jack then proceeds to tie Magic up in the ropes! He then hits chair
shot after chair shot to the helpless Magic! Magic is out cold, bleeding
profusely. Jack then throws the limp Yiroshi out of the ring, and calls for a
mike!
Siu Ann:
“I’m shocked and horrified by the brutality of Union Jack! This is a
disgusting display! Don’t give the man a microphone!”
Jackie:
“Why, oh why wouldn’t he join the HKWF?”
UJ:
“Ah, it’s been a while since I experienced the pleasure that is utterly
brutalising someone with a chair!”
The crowd boo loudly! UJ smiles nastily!
UJ:
“Where is your support for GZW’s hero? Am I not the man who stayed loyal
to GZW for you? These pair of losers here are nothing compared to Union Jack,
the British Butcher, The Menace! I AM wrestling! I don’t give a shit about the
new age or the veterans because every single wrestler on this roster is NOTHING
compared to me! I AM GZW, and you should be more appreciative!”
The crowd is cheering for Firefly!
UJ:
“Chant the bug boy’s name all you like! I know that his Hong Kong arse
has abandoned you, and he is on a plane to England, right now! The truth is
that GZW was nothing without Union Jack, and now I’m back, it’s gonna be
something! I will destroy every pathetic member of the new age! I will take out
any ‘veteran’ who thinks they can take me! These two losers here are only the
start! Everyone is going to be butchered, and there isn’t a thing that anyone
can do about it!”
UJ laughs nastily as he heads to the back.
Siu Ann:
“So the only reason that UJ has assaulted both Yiroshi and Magic is
because he believes he is the best wrestler in GZW? The man is sick, twisted…
goodness gracious, he’s insane!”
Jackie:
“Oh boy! Jack is back, and there is gonna be hell to pay!”
EMT’s run to the ring to attend to the bloody bodies of Yiroshi and
Magic.
Siu Ann:
“That’s all we have time for on Friday Night Travesty, so on behalf of
the whole commentary team…”
Jackie:
“Sayonara!”
The scene fades on the face of Union Jack who is grinning with pleasure
at the scene of destruction that he has caused!