Part Five The quarry. Noonish. He’s in the water again, swimming out to that little island in the middle of the quarry. I have to wonder if his home planet is devoid of water, because he sure seems to enjoy it on this world, in this life. I watch his arms rising and falling above the water, then stopping. For a moment my heart jerks in my chest because he has disappeared, but then I see his feet rise above the water as he dives beneath the surface. A few moments later, I see his arms again, then his whole body as he pulls himself onto the shore of the island. It’s been a week since we connected in his bedroom. My life, my outlook has changed. All of this time, I thought that I had been giving my all in my relationships, that I couldn’t possibly offer Michael or Max anything more than what I had. But the one thing I could not offer – myself – was the Achilles heel of both of those relationships. I’ve covered all of my insecurities by making jokes, by trying to not be serious about anything. Luckily, I realized that before I lost Max, before I pushed him away. I have to wonder if I would’ve been more trusting with Michael, would I have been able to maintain our relationship. Maybe that’s what he needed from me, but I couldn’t give it to him. It doesn’t matter now. I’ve given that trust to Max, and we’ve never been closer. I see Max drop to his butt on the shore of the island, picking at something in the sand between his feet. Even though I am too far away, I can just imagine the look on his face – his brows knitted together in curiosity, his bottom lip half in his mouth as he bites it. I smile at that. I wonder about his curious nature. Maybe he’s just inquisitive, but then again maybe some deep part of him remembers his old world and he is trying to make comparisons. I don’t know for sure, but I love him for it. Max stands and slips back into the water. I watch him swim the distance of the quarry and pull himself ashore near me. He walks over to the blanket and lies down on his back. I look over at his stomach and start to descend on it. He moves quicker than I do, though and suddenly I am on my back, struggling for control as he places his mouth on my abdomen and blows. I can’t believe he just belly-farted me! I feel his body shake as he laughs at my squeal, then he stretches out on his side beside me on the blanket. He retrieves his baseball cap and covers the side of his face with it to shield his eyes from the sun and buries his head in my shoulder. In a matter of minutes, he is asleep against me, his breath coming in a slow steady rhythm. I turn my head so that I can watch him sleep. His eyelids flutter, his dark lashes brushing his cheeks, and I know he is dreaming. His lips are parted slightly, just giving a glimpse of his white teeth. I look up into the sky, at the sun, and it strikes me that we are like two lizards baking on a rock. I want to stay here forever, with him. I reach over and touch his face. He stirs in his sleep, mumbles something incoherent, and wraps an arm across my waist. I smile – that’s exactly what I wanted him to do. I snuggle into him and close my eyes. Lying in the sun, listening to Max’s steady breathing, I am suddenly sleepy. And I feel at ease enough, safe enough to let myself drift off. It feels good to trust. THE END |
| PART 5 |