Introduction
What is so special about my testimony? Not much really, but I still hope it encourages you in some way. What encourages me most is the fact that, as I look back over my life, I see how the Lord was always there, always guiding me toward Him, even when I did not even know Him yet. Talk about grace. He sought me and watched over me when I had no idea He even existed, much less knowing Him personally.
Heritage
After accepting Him into my life, I learned I have a great Christian heritage on both sides of my family. My mother told me that her father and mother both devout and strict Catholics. They both died before I was born, so I never met them. I remember my great grandmother though. I stayed with her a lot (or so it seems to me). She was a kind old lady who loved me generously. From what I remember, she definitely reflected Christ. I also remember that she loved to watch CBN; she certainly had it on all the time.
My younger brother and I did not know my father well because we lost contact with him a few years after he and my mother divorced. I was around ten at the time, and I knew he had remarried and had a daughter. They lived in another state, literally, halfway across the country. Shortly after we finally made contact again, I learn that he and his wife were not Christians when we had lost contact, but now they are. I soon learned that most of my (large) family on his side was, too. Even more, we had a heritage of prophets that went back for generations. Of course, they never stopped praying for my brother and I.
In spite of all the Christians in my family, my brother and I did not know the Lord until we were almost adults. Our mother and stepfather did little to teach us about the Lord. We never went to church, read the Bible, or even prayed. My mother did not want to force religion on us, so she always taught us to choose for ourselves. I guess she was this way because her parents were so strict about it. She did tell us from time to time that the God of the Bible is God. In fact, she often said, "Things happen for a reason," implying that God is in control. In the end, her Christ-like attitude influenced us most, as she is one of the most giving and self-sacrificing people I know. As of the writing of this testimony, she has been talking about the Lord more, and that encourages me.
My stepfather raised us as his own, and he taught us a lot. However, he did not teach us about God because he is "agnostic," believing in a "supreme being" or "beings," but not in the God of the Bible (or so he leads us to believe). He did often share his thoughts with us about these things. The good thing is, as a skeptic, we had many debates about these sorts of things and so he taught us to think for ourselves. I am happy he did and I think he did a great job. If anything, this contributed to our coming to Christ. After my brother and I became Christians, we learned that he went to church a lot while growing up. We were surprised to learn that he knew a lot about Christianity, the Bible, etc.
Experience
Not only does it seem the Lord surrounded me with the right people who would help me come to know Him, but it seem He also instilled in me a sense of the spirit realm. I have always had a sense that there is something more, and so I was always interested in spirituality. As a child, I remember watching the movie "Jesus Christ Superstar" and I remember how it moved me. I cried every time I saw Jesus on the cross, and I wondered about that. I didn't even know who he was, yet I empathized with him and understood his death had something to do with me. At some point, I started wearing a cross on a necklace. At the time, I did not even know the real significance of the cross. I just I knew it had some significance and that I liked wearing it.
On my own, during my pre-teen years I started reading an old KJV Bible I had found in a dresser draw. My curiosity got me started, and although I did not really understand what I was reading, I found it interesting. When I later started getting depressed, I would read the Bible and the depression would go away. I thought that was odd, especially since I didn't understand what I was reading half the time, but I knew it worked and that was all I cared.
Around the same time, I also dabbled in the occult, things like Tarot cards, horoscope, astrology, New Age dream interpretation, etc. When Star Wars came out, I went a little overboard with the idea of the "The Force." I realized, as I started out saying here, that I felt there was something more is out there. Little did I know, "something" was really Someone, and the spiritual realm I sought to tap into was real.
Some time during high school, some friends started inviting my brother and me to go to church with them. I kept telling them I did not need church, and I refused to go. Eventually I did go, or rather, we both did, separately. We went to different churches. We quickly discovered that we enjoyed the church youth group and their activities. (Let this stand as a testimony of the importance and effectiveness church youth groups.) We had so much fun, and we enjoyed being with our friends. Shortly after discovering church, I remember testing my other friend's reactions by sharing what I was learning with them. Most of them were not very receptive, and so I often dropped the subject for fear of persecution.
Most everyone in school knew each other, and groups of us hung out together a lot, often partying. Drinking and just getting rowdy were common, including some of my Christian friends and I. Some of my friends did drugs. Some had sex. Although I had plenty of opportunity for both, even having one girl call me on the phone to outright ask me to have sex with her, the Lord somehow protected me from these things -- even before I knew Him. Drugs never appealed to me. Although I did want sex, I did not do it, for one reason or another, and when I did try, it did not work out. (Well, not until I met Missy, who is now my wife.) I did enjoy drinking though, even though I was underage.
Conversion
Reflecting on all of this, anything could have happened to me, but it seems the Lord was gracious, even drawing me to Him me in the midst of it all. His Word is true; "While you were yet sinners, Christ saved you." Although I had said I didn't need church, my brother and I finally accept Christ there.
Unlike most, or so it seems to me, I do not recall myself having a "conversion experience." I cannot cite a specific day or instance in my life when I can say, "I prayed and the Lord saved me." I remember praying for salvation a few times, but I never went forward for an alter calls. It seems my salvation came more as a process. I prayed the prayer but continued on my way, and then, over time, I grew closer and closer to the Lord, stronger and stronger in the things of God.
Growing up
My wife and I met in church and really started dating after going to a church youth retreat together. We dated for about three years before we were married. Soon after getting married, I started going to college part-time, and while on the way to class, I listened to Chuck Swindoll on the radio. His now famous work, "The Grace Awakening," stirred in me the kind of growth I really needed. His ministry, Insight For Living, continued to bless me during those two years. Later on, while at work, I began listening to Christian radio ministries every morning. Along with Chuck Swindoll of Insight For Living, I listened to James Kennedy of Truths That Transform and Coral Ridge Ministries, James Dobson of Focus On The Family, Charles Stanley of In Touch, Adrian Rodgers of Love Worth Finding, and David Jeremiah of Turning Point.
Along with these ministries, I also began listening to a free tape ministry from Andrew Wommack Ministries. A Christian friend at work shared his tapes with me, and later, I started ordering them for myself. Along with the tape and radio ministries, I spent a lot of time reading. In fact, I started reading The Bible, literally, every spare moment I had. Along with the Bible, I read the works of from other Christians, such as James Kennedy, Ravi Zechariah, James Dobson, T. D. Jakes, Neil T. Anderson, and Smith Wigglesworth, to name a few.
The Baptist church we attended was good, but all these ministries were the real contributors to my growth, and they probably did more for me than I realize even now. In fact, I soon began to realize that no church is 100% correct in their doctrines, and zeal for specific doctrines often causes divisions or other problems. I found that even just being associated with a certain denomination sometimes cause problems, so, with all of that in mind, I decided to become non-denominational. I guess I relate to Charismatic and Full-Gospel the most. I am comfortable associating myself with any true Christian regardless of their denomination.
Catholic or not
Interestingly, I originally wrote this testimony to a Catholic, who asked me, "Why are you so against Catholicism?" I am not Catholicism, because as I reflect on the impact of Catholicism in my life, that is rather profound, too. While I have met many different types of Christians, and I have been to all kinds of churches, I have never been to a Catholic Church. Even so, God has continued to use Catholics to bless my life...
The first Catholics in my life were my mother and great grandmother. Although they did not teach me much about Christ verbally, or by taking me to church, or anything like that, they did usually have a Christ-like attitude in most everything they did. Of course, I did notice and wonder about their attitude, and now it impresses me.
On one job, I had a great Christian friend who was a former Catholic. He blessed us a lot, as we often fellowshipped with him and his new family. He told me of his struggles with Catholicism. He and I shared the same concern. That is, you can be a Catholic, or belong to any other denomination, yet not be a Christian or "in Christ." His whole family is Catholic and while growing up, he saw a lot of he refers to as the "human element." In spite of his struggles and turning away from Catholicism, he remains faithful to Christ. In fact, he is a very strong Christian. Years ago, he and his wife sold everything they possessed so that he could go to school and become a full-time minister, which he is today.
At another job, I had a good friend that was a devoted Catholic. She helped me to learn more about Catholicism than any other person, including helping me get past some of the false teachings that some promote. She once let me borrow a Catholic book that I thought was excellent. I do not remember the name of it, but it was like an encyclopedia for Catholics. It explained many of the doctrines of Catholicism, and included commentaries on many subjects. She was quite dynamic, with many interesting views. She was even into the "Charismatic" movement, which I was surprised to hear, as I did not know that Catholics even knew anything about it.
I love to listen to all types of music, and the most surprising discovery was when I learned that my favorite Christian musician, John Michael Talbot, is a Catholic monk. His music blessed me more than any other, and so much so that I now have a collection of all his works. What really fascinated me about this was to find out that he was also my father's favorite musician. Although we lost contact with one another for some fifteen years, we came to same conclusions on many matters, even enjoying the same musician as our favorite.
Conclusion
Although my parents did not raise my brother or me as Christians, and although I never had a "conversion experience", the Lord's hand was on us from birth. He surrounded us Christian family and friends, some of whom simply prayed for us, and he surrounded us with others who had what we needed in order to come to Him. For instance, my mother and great grandmother's examples, and my stepfather's seeking spirit. In spite of me, and in spite of the circumstance of my life, the Lord "saved" me. He continues to work in me, too. He continues to grow me and show me just how awesome He is. Praise the Lord!!!