Practical
God's design for the perfect suit is...
- durable
- 100% natural
- waterproof
- elastic
- a unique design -- a guaranteed original, like no one else's
- and changes color in the sun
Did you guess what kind of suit it is? Yep! Your birthday suit! :)
The book "Supercharging MS-Dos" by Microsoft Press recommends, "If possible, compute in the nude"...
To reduce the accumulation of static electricity, you must increase the humidity, change or get rid of the carpeting, or both. Although a small room-sized humidifier may help, these steps are often too expensive to be practical. A less expensive (and correspondingly less effective) step is to avoid wearing leather-soled shoes or clothes made of synthetic fibers. (If possible, compute in the nude.) Weather or not you take any of these steps, you should still touch metal to dissipate the static charge before you touch the computer or a disk. - "Supercharging MS-Dos" by Microsoft Press, 3rd Ed., pg. 393, under the section entitled "Static Electricity Is A Killer"
On the fourth day of telecommuting, I realized that clothes are totally unnecessary. - Dilbert
Regarding Children
Being natural and matter-of-fact about nudity prevents your children from developing an attitude of shame or disgust about the human body. If parents are very secretive about their bodies and go to great lengths to prevent their children from ever seeing a buttock or breast, children will wonder what is so unusual, and even alarming, about human nudity. - Dr. Lee Salk, Psychiatrist. - From an article in McCall's Magazine, June 1976
"...with very young children accustomed from the beginning to nudity in themselves and their parents, a great deal is taken for granted, and it doesn't seem to be much of an issue to them. What nudity does is make it easy for children to become absolutely certain about just how men and women are made. This knowledge is of great importance in assuring the child of his or her own correct gender. The differences in body states and sizes - and in body organs - can then be taken for granted and will provide an accurate image of how they themselves, or the opposite sex, will look when grown up. Children whose parents feel at ease in such natural events as stepping out of the shower, toweling, and walking back to their room to dress are fortunate." - Mary S. Calderone, M.D., in "The Family Book About Sexuality"
A child who has never been allowed to see his parents and brothers and sisters naked sees nudity as something shocking. - Dr. Helga Fleischhauer-Hardt, Show Me (New York: St. Martin's Press, 1975).
Thought Provoking
If we were meant to be nude, we would have been born that way.
If it's so dirty to be naked, why do we get naked to get clean? - Bryan Maloney
Take off all your clothes and walk down the street waving a machete and firing an Uzi, and terrified citizens will phone the police and report: "There's a naked person outside!" - Mike Nichols
You'll never catch a nudist with his pants down.
In necessary things, unity; in doubtful things, liberty; in all things, charity. - Richard Baxter
Beliefs must be judged by the actions they produce." - Commentary on John 4:2 entitled, "Who were the Gnostics?" (NIV)
No one is blinder than he who will not see. - from song "I Fall Down" by U2
Excerpt from a ClothesFree.com forum, entitled, "How do you get people to understand?"
Non-naturist: I can't understand why it's important that you are accepted and not merely tolerated so long as you can practice your lifestyle.
Naturist: Toleration is demeaning, it implies that those who do the tolerating are somehow superior to those who are tolerated. Toleration implies limitation such as "I will tolerate what you do if you do it within MY definition of limitations e.g. so I can't see you." Acceptance on the other hand implies equality such as "I may not like what you do but I have no problem with you doing it". For example: I don't like drunks but I tolerate them provided they don't invade my personal space, while I accept people who play golf even though it seems an absurd game to me.
Inspirational
What spirit is so empty and blind, that it cannot recognize the fact that the foot is more noble than the shoe, and skin more beautiful that the garment with which it is clothed? - Michelangelo
The girl with dark hair was coming towards him across the field. With what seemed a single movement she tore off her clothes and flung them disdainfully aside. Her body was white and smooth, but it aroused no desire in him, indeed he barely looked at it. What overwhelmed him in that instant was admiration for the gesture with which she had thrown her clothes aside. With all its grace and carelessness it seemed to annihilate a whole [oppressive] culture, a whole system of thought. - From a dream scene in George Orwell's "1984"
Fun or Laughable
A rather well-proportioned secretary, Joan, wanted to spend almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.
She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs; she was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear.
"Excuse me, miss," said the flustered little assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs. "The Hilton doesn't mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would very much appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday."
"What difference does it make?" Joan asked rather calmly. "No one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel."
"Not exactly," said the embarrassed little man. "You're lying on the dining room skylight."
Do you have access to Microsoft Word 97? If so, check out one of it's "eggs" (a special hidden feature). In Microsoft Word, type "I'd love to see you naked" without the quotes, then highlight the entire sentence, click on Thesaurus and see it's response.
Grin and bare it! - Slogan
He who sleeps in the raw, is in for a nude awakening. - Sign on a door.
Please Contribute
Do you know of any good nudist/naturist related quips or quotes? Please pass them on. Make sure you specify the source when possible.