THIS INTERVIEW STARTED A LONG TIME AGO AND, AS ALWAYS HAPPENS WHEN A CERTAIN ELECTED NEW HAMPSHIRE'S MAN IS INVOLVED, IT TOOK AGES TO BE FINISHED... WELL I CAN HONESTLY SAY I WON'T BE WAITING SO MUCH FOR ANY BAND YOU KNOW, BUT THE TUNNEL RATS REALLY DESERVE THE HONOUR, AND EVEN IF THIS WEBSITE IS NOT THE BEST OF THE PUBLISHED SPOTS I PRESENT THE TALK WITH THE MAN, DUKE CREVANATOR, IN ALL ITS UNREPENTANT GLORY....

GD- Let's skip the story, everybody knows me and you are the best of friends, so I need to ask wiser questions this time: what has changed more or less in the Tunnel Rats in all these years on the hunt?
Fuck, a lot has changed. When we first started we all lived within walking distance to eachother in Dover, New Hampshire. Me and Bernie lived together and we practiced in the basment of our apartment building that was built in about 1830. it had a dirt floor and we had to run extension cords up the basement stairs because there was no electricty down there. We used to piss behind the furnace. We had hundreds of empties all over the place, and several bongs. And we used to do lines of coke while squatting on the dirt with a mirror on a milk crate. Now we all live about 30 minutes away from eachother, most of the band members have kids, we all have wives, and our practice space has heat and electricty. But at least there's still hundreds of empty beer cans, bongs and scratched up mirrors. So now that I think about it, it's not all that different I reckon. Except the driving part. We still write all our songs the same way. Me and Captain Leech write the lyrics at the bar, then we get together and write the music around the lyrics we have.

GD- NH seems to be a good place when it comes to spawning evil minded characters, just think of GG, the early Queers, you guys, Stephen King... what's the element that make you turn into hellraisin' bastards according to you??
Well first off, Stephen King is actually from Maine, not New Hampshire. Although I live only about 20 minutes from the Maine border. As for your question, I think it's a combination of things. First off, New Hampshire has a very, very unique attitude. There is a lot of state pride here. For your readers in Europe, it's kind of like how certain countries in Europe look down on other European countries. People in New Hampshire look at a state like California, the way the Germans look at France. Or the way the Italians look at a country like Slovenia. We just can't stand a state made up of a bunch of smelly hippy losers. Which is why people in New Hampshire tend to hate states in the northeast, the midwest and the northwest. We tend not to have a problem with southern states and southwestern states. With the exceptions of Florida, Colorado, Illinois and Indiana. But that's a whole other story. Also, there isn't much to do in New Hampshire but drink outside, either in the snow or the hot sun. It's wilderness up here man. Granted there are some built up areas, but for the most part we're total woods and mountains. I mean most cities in the US have a larger population than the ENTIRE state of New Hampshire. For example Marco, when you and I hung out in Austin, Texas, we were in a city that had more people than my entire state does. This lack of things to do, along with brutally cold and long winters tends to cause people to go a little crazy. Especially crazy in an anti-social way. Hence the large proportion of sociopaths who hail from the "Live Free or Die" state.

GD- Now let's focus on the 10" you did on Scarey... don't you think it's too metal looking and the Nerds are a bunch of pricks??
A two part question? Well the answer is yes and yes. Nah, I'm just kidding. I think the record is kind of metal-looking, but I love it! And I don't think the Nerds are a bunch of pricks, I just think they are a bunch of typical slimy ass ignorant ugly greasy dagos. Just like the guidos I have to deal with all the time when I go down to Boston for a show. Nah, I'm just kidding again. I love the Nerds bcause they are NOT like dumb ass American Italians I deal with all the time. I must admit the Nerds are a bad ass band, and their side of the record gets played a lot here at the Crevanator compound, along with their CDs.

GD- What about "I like to Hurt people"? Heard you guys were up with a project with the same name...
Actually it's a good thing I waited so long to do this interview. "I Like to Hurt People" was a movie made in the early 80's about the infamous pro-wrestler The Sheik. It was produced by Donald G. Jackson, who is a very famous B-Movie director here in the US. Roller Blade is probably his most famous film. Anyway, it has long been a dream of mine to cover the ENTIRE soundtrack to that movie. Well Steel Cage records said they would put it out in 2004 if we recorded it. Lately I have been in touch with Mr. Jackson and he likes the idea. However, he does not own the rights to the songs. So as I write this, I'm waiting to hear from the owner of the song rights. But if your readers want to help, e-mail me with messages saying how much you'd love to see the Tunnel Rats do this project and I'll forward them on to Mr. Jackson. In fact, I'm begging your readers to do so! email me at dukecrev@attbi.com

GD- You are one of the few not southern CoS bands, how do you feel like being Yankees among'em??
This has never been an issue. I guess when we first started hanging out with COS bands (we attended one Supershow, and played another before we were inducted) we tended to hang out more with bands like Limecell and Rancid Vat because, with all of us being Yankees, we tended to talk too fast and just be generally manic and hyper. That is a major flaw in all of us Yankees. We can't figure out how to relax. But as time has gone on, we (the Tunnel Rats) desperately look forward to hanging out with people who know how to relax and take things as they come. Hell, when a southern COS band is stressed, we still think they are mellow. A classic example was Walt Wheat of Before I Hang in New Orleans for the last Supershow. If I had been in his shoes I would have been bouncing off the fucking walls with stress. And I'm sure he was stressed out, but man you wouldn't have known it by talking to him. He was cool as a cucumber. I know the Southern bands, even though they hate most Yankees, don't place us in that category. And hell, I'm damned honored about that. Even though I do tend to go Yank sometimes and blabber a mile a minute because that's what I have to do up here just to survive. It usually takes me 24 hours at a Spershow to slow down to a reasonable level.

GD- Listen to this, a lot of times I hear from wimpy pop-punk adicts saying you are a great band just because B-Face plays in the band, and not 'cause he's a motherfuckin' great man, but because he played with the Queers, Groovie Ghoulies and so on... what do you think about this?
I think the TR have NOTHING to compare to those bands and audience... DUKE: Of course the Tunnel rats have NOTHING to do with pop punk. However we in the Tunnel Rats ARE good friends with many pop punk bands, like the Groovie Ghoulies, the Teen Idols, the Nobody's (well no JJ's new band Down the River) and many, many others. But if we wanted to be a pop punk band, we would have been one. The fact of the matter is, me and B-face started this band because the Tunnel Rats style was the kind of music we wanted to play. Just because B-Face has played in those other bands never made a difference. And if you think that B-Face isn't a total bad-ass just because he's played in the Queers and the Groovie Ghoulies you are a fucking idiot. First off, B-Face has never played in a bad band. Think of how great the Queers WERE, how great the Groovie Ghoulies, the Real Kids and the Tunnel Rats ARE today. You have to realize that B-face is not only incredibly talented, but he's pretty fucking smart as well. He's never put himself in a crappy band. As for what pop punk kids think, why on earth would we give a fuck? If you like the Tunnel Rats, good for you. If you hate us, we prefer that.

GD- What about your ancient Roman Empire fixation? Where does it come from?
I spent five years of my life studying Roman History and Latin. I have also studied history in general pretty extensively, but the Romans are the most fascinating. If you live in the US or Europe it's amazing to really know how much influence the Romans have in the year 2003 on our governments, languages, customs, military, justice system, well just about everything. It's sad not many people even realize it. It also helps that some of the most bizarre, brilliant and ruthless people come from that era. So many great stories exist about people like Antony, Sulla, Marius, Pompey, Julius Caesar, etc. Actually everyone always thinks of Caligula as crazy, but he was hardly the craziest. I specialized in studying Roman history in the years 500 BC to 100 AD, and there are a lot of people who put Caligula to shame. Antony being my favorite.

GD- Where does Captain Leech has gone? He used to sing and now he just made a spare appearence on the 10" for Scarey...
I see Captain Leech at least 5 days a week at the bar. He's alive and well. You'll most likely never see him play live again (unless the CoS Supershow happens in Vegas this year) because he has his own reasons for not playing live. But every new Tunnel Rats song you will hear will have the lyrics co-written by Leech and myself. And we'll get him in the studio to sing a few of them for every record, I promise that.

GD- Tell me something about your sport mania and the time when last year your team won the Superbowl.
Well we all are fans of various sports, but we are only psychotic about American Football. And obviously our team is the NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS! I know in the case of Captain Leech and myself, we were so excited when the Patriots won the Superbowl because for our entire lives the Patriots had been a horrile team, but we loved them anyway. And to have them finally win the Superbowl made all those years of suffering worth it. They were the best, when no one gave them a chance to win. I am not ashamed to admit I cried when they won the Superbowl. All those years of being made fun of for wearing Patriots shirts, hats and other stuff, my dedication to them had finally paid off. As for why we love American Football so much. Well it's hard to explain to a European audience. It is the most violent sport in the world. Even though they wear the helmets and pads, believe me these guys are so much bigger, faster, and stronger than any other athletes. How many other sports have at LEAST 2 or 3 players end up paralyzed every year because of playing it? Not your version of football, rugby, or any other sport.

GD- I think you guys would be a bigger band if you'd just tour more, but I also know you have other things to do in your lives to take care of this aspect. What do you think?
You may be right. I'm not sure. We gave up the idea of trying to tour about a year into starting the band (1994 or so). I think we put on a pretty good show when we want to. So perhaps if we toured that would be the case. I really have no interest in touring the United States. I've already seen most of it, and when you get right down to it, I prefer to hang out in the swamp behind my house fishing, drinking beer and listening to tunes on my portable CD player. Or hanging out at the local bar in tiny New Hampshire shooting the shit with the locals, flirting with the hot waitresses, going to the strip joint, and shooting my guns down in the sand pit. I really respect all of my friends who do tour. People like Antiseen, Cocknoose, the Teen Idols, I don't know how they handle it. I love playing, and I love to talk with people who go to our shows, but I hate dealing with promoters, and I hate being in cars or vans for a long period of time. However, when it comes to Europe, I'd love to tour there, at least Italy. Too bad that me and B-face would probably be the only members who could go. Any chance some members of the Nerds would be willing to become European Tunnel Rats for a short tour? I'll already be in Latvia for 10 days in late June 2003, perhaps I can extend my stay by 2 weeks or so?

GD- Maybe brother, maybe one day this will happen... and I'm writing this here... just please don't wait 'till I get old to do it, I could have problems holding my guitar in hands, ehehehehe....

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