This is last year, Christmas Eve

Oh, yes, another thing about 1974... Roni had told the world that her Mom was expecting. She was SO excited.

On Christmas day, my friend Pagan came over bearing a gift certificate to Tower Books/Records. Whee! I know what I'll be getting: a book on the 20th-century history of dinosaurs. It's something about the culture and dino-loving, a definite must for me. I had two books for him: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0679404465/fossilfreakshome/ YOU GOT TO DANCE WITH THEM WHAT BRUNG YOU and http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0679728244/fossilfreakshome/ DON'T WORRY, HE WON'T GET FAR ON FOOT

Later the Curmudgeon was by. He had computer games for everyone but Bernadette, who got a screenwriting book. My big present was the modem card, but I got to open "Tomb Raider." I must be the only person in the U. S. of A. who didn't know who Lara Croft was. I had for him an alien puzzle (with an alien fingerpuppet) and a flying squirrel. We were trying to convince him to have the squirrel fly and let Rich shoot at it with his dart crossbow, but Noooooooo. There was also a t-shirt from the Carnegie.

Then came Boxing Day, on which we were actually celebrating Christmas. A little after 10, Monica and Mark (and TWO dogs!) and Roni and R.J. came rolling in. Mark brought in a gingerbread house and train that Monica had made. After coffee and rolls, it was time for the LOOT! Once Monica understood that I had put the cushions onto the floor for "sitting", not for "Sydney", the dog, we were ready to begin.

A couple of years ago we started a gift exchange. This means, as a rule, better quality presents. So: I gave Monica a sweatsuit ("no outfit is complete without cat hair.") and a brass turtle magnifying glass from Frank's store and a painted rock turtle. Monica gave Bernadette a gift certificate for an interview suit. We'll be going to San Jose next weekend to redeem this. Bernadette had a Civil War book, CD-ROM, and Xena cards for Rich. Rich had gotten Vince a couple of 49er sweatshirts to compete with the Steeler ones he got for himself in Pittsburgh. Vince gave Roni a hiking book and a gift certificate to a camping store for a tent. (I had a good look in the book and found a couple of new hikes I'd like to try.) Roni had a campstove for Mark. And Mark gave me (WHEEE!) a two-night stay at a lodge in Ft. Bragg. I am totally delighted. We've never been to Ft. Bragg and I think we'll go when the whales start north again in April or so.

Rich and I had gifts for each other. He gave me a dinosaur book and a Godzilla puppet, and when he opened his Lego Mindstorms Robotics, Vince said "Wait a minute! Who are the grownups and who are the kids here?" I'd learned about the Robotics from Ceej's journal, and Rich didn't have a clue they existed. This was especially funny after I got the Lego set on St. Nicholas day. Mark had also been given this set by Monica.
When I had gone to Fry's to get it, before we left for Pittsburgh, the lackadaisical clerks didn't know about it. I nearly tripped over this huge display as I went to leave the store, so I went back with the box long enough to "nyaah!" at them. Somebody lost a big commission on that! (I really dislike Fry's. You're getting the idea I don't much like any big store, and you'd be right.)

Then it was time for me to set up the turkey, and for the family to disappear to the field with the three dogs. This meant that they didn't see me drop the blueberries all over. Never mind, I was going to wash them anyway, so they got a good cleaning before going into the fruit salad. Later, Vince made cranberry sauce, and in the process he cleaned the stovetop. Later still, Roni and R.J. stuffed mushrooms. After she returned from the Science Center, and just before dinner, she polished the silver. I need Roni to come once a year just to polish the silver! I suddenly realized we needed to put leaves in the table. Rich helped with that. He'd built two of the three table leaves, and those were the two we added, making it comfortable for 8.

At one point, everyone was curled up with a book. Mark went off to take a nap, and R.J., Roni and Vince went off to the Science Center. During the course of the lazy day, and dinner, we had a number of conversations:

• (This just in my head)I was remembering what fun we all had 4 years ago, with the three significant others coming, as well. After dinner, I recall, everyone blew bubbles. I was a little distressed that it was all of FOUR years ago, and Mark and Teresa have moved on, while R.J. is still in the same spot. I showed off the diamond ring I got from my aunt, and Monica and Roni worked on (oblivious?) R.J.
• We discussed how it's too bad kids have to suffer when their parents don't teach them to write "thank-you" notes. Monica went on at great length about how I forced them to write the notes, but how today's kids don't seem to do this. I stopped birthday presents to some for this reason, and Monica is going to quit with the Christmas pressies now. (Roni already had.) Too bad for the kids, who are nice kids, just poorly trained.
• Monica posts to Usenet! This is a surprise after the years at home when she gave me weird looks. She's a regular on rec.pets.dogs.misc.
• We discussed the conservation of avoirdupois, and note that Roni's lost 30 pounds have been saved in the family. This doesn't explain Rich and I, however, so perhaps we've got Callista Flockhart's weight added on.
• Three people were killed in a Christmas eve fire on Monica's old street, and yes, Monica and Mark knew them.
• Monica lusts after my bronzewear, but Rich won't let her have it.

Then it was time to open the stockings. Candy and trinkets. Rich got a plastic-bag dispenser that hooks onto the dog's collar. I got a retractable hand.

In the course of the day, the dogs made R.J. more and more whiffly. We put them out for awhile, but mostly they were in. Sailor finally relaxed around them. They wagged off one ornament, a pullet egg, and broke it, and denuded the bottom branches of tinsel, but on the whole, they were nice to have.

Once Monica and Mark left, Roni and R.J. went off to settle into their motel, and then we all met for the traditional Yarnot cutthroat bowling (yeah, right.) Sore-shoulder I decided not to do it so I was just a cheerleader. Such a pity to waste my ninja bowling outfit, black with the "split happens" t-shirt Roni gave me! Scores: R.J. 86,113, 105 (actually 97 as he had a gutter-bounce). Sunbunny (Roni) 69 (67, really), 79, 96. Starman (that would be Vince) 113, 110, and 102. The Mad Bomber (yes, Bernadette!) 70, 74, 93. And Gimpy Rich started with 4 gutterballs, then got a strike. Consistent as always, he bowled 101, 147, and 128, and his foot was hurting with a passion after that. (He thinks the night in San Francisco going up and down Nob Hill completely did his already sore foot in.) You know, if we bowled more than once a year, we might actually be dangerous.

A totally satisfactory Christmas.