Isn't it a pity-

Unplug the telephone wire to prevent me from talking online,

And in doing so,

Disconnecting from your all-important email for the night?

The reasoning, too, I must admit,

Is just infallable:

In order to assert your power over me,

To prove that you're right and you win

Just because you're older,

You say, reaching for the cord,

"You'll just have to start over then."

Shall we examine this?

Please.

I'm simply dying to know how

Instructing me to start over on my homework,

In effect forcing me to spend twice as long on it,

Is perfectly all right, while

It is absolutely inacceptable that I

Communicate with my peers while I answer meaningless science questions.

(You might like to know that,

Despite whatever you may believe,

This will not cause me to double my homework time.)

Is it just m, or is

Your logic only slightly flawed?

Just a guess, now-

But perhaps, and I only hypothesize here,

Perhaps the reason you simply must deny me the internet

Is not a matter of worry of my bedtime growing too late,

But rather a matter of you proving yourself over me?

Now I absolutely hate to suggest so

Ludicrous a notion- it's only a fleeting idea, really.

That's right, Mummy Dearest-

Tell it to Daddy exactly how it happened:

"Well, she refused to sign offline...

I just had to unplug it!"

Incomplete, inaccurate, biased stores are so delightfully fun, aren't they?

Oh yes, Mother- go right ahead and yell at your son

Who hasn't done a thing.

That ought to make things just fantastic,

If I do say so myself.

 

26 April 2004