Once upon a time, in an an an enchanted forest.... ( It really was enchanted you know). There lived an evil witch. She was a very ugly thing indeed, appalling to look at really, but I suppose that was because of the circumstances by which we met. Oh! Why, dear me, you don’t know the whole story, do you?

Well, I guess I shall have to start at the beginning ( as Sir Chrisalot only told you about the part that made him look good....hmph!)

Oh, don’t get me wrong, I am his wife...fairly new of course. He is everything that you’ve heard....you know....brave, daring, courageous, that sort of thing. But I do wish he would stop skipping out on the details that make our story so remarkable. He did tell how I came through and saved him in the end, didn’t he? The dunce set the whole dungeon on fire before we were all the way out. He actually looked surprised when the evil witch locked us in. I love him dearly, that oaf....wouldn’t change him for the world.

Of course it does help that he is the best looking knight in the entire kingdom. And the bravest. He’s incredibly charming ( his smile would melt your heart) and so sincere....and romantic...yes, yes.....Oh, sorry. Forgive me a little daydream. He’s off on one of those crazy crusades and I do miss him.

Well, anyway, where was I? Oh yes. So- back when I was a beautiful wee little thing, My castle was surrounded by an enchanted forest. Now this forest was said to keep all manner of evil and wicked creatures in it as well as many practitioners of the dark arts (hence, the witch).

My father absolutely forbade me to walk in the forest at all, for my whole life. You can imagine how that, on top of all the mystical folklore, peaked my adolescent curiosity.

So, one day, while my father was out hunting and my mother was making the castle ready for a celebration of some type of ....charity thing ( I could NEVER remember what the organization was called...Save the Enchanted Frogs or something. I guess Dad was a frog once) So I went exploring. My original intention was to be a good little thing and keep to the main grounds of the castle but curiosity got the better of me and off I went.

(...Still there, dear? You’ll want to listen now; this is where it gets good. I know I’m a little long winded but just try to remain focused.)

So. I am now in the enchanted forest. As soon as I entered the forest I was knocked out. When I woke up I was blind folded.

Well, you know as well as I do that princesses are not kidnapped, nor are they ever blindfolded. Naturally, I thought I was waking from a dream. When I woke ( as I was saying) my head hurt something awful so I started to call for my nurse. While I was in mid-yell, I was walloped over the head and told to be still.

" Shhhh...I’ll get you out as soon as I can figure these knots out."

"Who are you -FEIND!!! My father will hang you for this!" I had just realized that I was tied up.

"My name is Chrisalot. I’ve come to save you. I was commissioned to rid the forest of fire spitters and I saw you tied to this cauldron. The witch just went to get some snag root and I thought I would take a chance while I had it."

" Oh, sorry. Take off my blind fold, will you?"

" I can’t. If the witch looks you in the eyes you will curdle inside and die."

Just then, I heard a horrid cackle and the witch was stomping through the forest toward us. I didn’t know that Chrisalot had hidden behind the cauldron. I felt her untying the ropes around my wrists and unshackling my ankle. Then I heard her scream while I was being lifted off the ground.

I gasped in horror as my blindfold was finally removed, and I saw the wreckage of what used to be a witch. She was melting into a thick slimy purple ooze.

"Gross," I said.

"We should get you home"

I nearly forgot he was there. As I turned to face my hero I saw the most heavenly blue eyes I had ever looked into. I didn’t want to go home right then- I wanted to talk to Chrisalot for hours until the moon rose over the canopy of trees above us. But he insisted that I go, so that there would be no accusations of ill intent. ( Part of this code, I guess, for knights. Some kind of honor thing.)

Anyway, I half expected a visit from him now and then. I mean, I would’ve at least thought he would have found me attractive. But, nothing. No visit or letter... no contact. But we were only fifteen....what can anyone expect out of a fifteen year old boy in the way of a date?

Well the years went by and my fairies had all made good on their promises of beauty and talent and klutziness( for good humor, she said. She was sent to another kingdom after that, but you can’t undo a fairy gift). Every man in the entire continent ( which was only twenty miles square back then) Stared as I rode by in the carriage. They were constantly, and boldly I might add, asking for invitations to call on me. I tell you it got to be quite a bore, that little game. And I was so tired of looking at every one’s eyes to see if it was him. I just wanted to be sure he wasn’t a dream, as a voice and eyes like his can only be.

I almost invited Harry the Humble over ( He was the only one too humble to ask me) when I saw Him!!! He saw me too, I think. We ran to each other and swore we would never be apart again.

Well, like I always say, "Our own plans are not always the right plans." And off he was sent. I got used to it.... Him being gone for weeks at a time. We had talked about it and it was perfectly clear that he would have to retire his sword when we were ready to marry. Even with that re-assurance, his call to the land of Fremont was painfully hard to take. It was to be the longest, though not the most dangerous of his crusades.

After a few weeks of Chrisalot being gone, I grew weary of mother’s games in the parlor and father’s silly parties. And balls every other night!! They did all this to entertain me in his absence but REALLY!! It gets to be quite a chore getting in and out of a ball gown every other evening, especially when you’re dead tired from being dragged around the dance floor by every blue eyed man in the kingdom. ( I suppose they thought the blue eyes gave them a better chance of nabbing me while Chrisalot was away.... the brutes!)

So, anyway, all this got quite boring so I took to walking on the beach. I would count the seashells and if I found an especially unusual one I would take it to the fairy cottage in the glen. They fancied enchanting them to play nasty little pranks on children and selling them in the market.

Well, I found one. As soon as I saw it I knew it was perfect for my fairy friends. It was almost buried in the beach sand but it was so lustrous and shiny I had to give it to them. It was lavender and pearly and so beautiful...unlike any I had ever seen before. I bent down to pick it up and heard something like a whisper coming from the inside. I put it to my ear and it said, "Sleep...Heatherine...sleeeep...."

"Who’s there?" I said. "How do you know my name......"

And before I even got the last word out I fainted!!!

When I finally awoke (You can imagine how tired I was of all this waking up in strange places. I mean what are the odds of it happening to the same princess twice?!) I was tied up and, as far as I knew, left for dead on a very cold, very large dungeon floor. I listened for any voices or sounds but heard none. So, I sat up for at least a good hour thinking of who would have it in for me so bad as to kidnap me twice and leave me to starve to death in a dungeon. I couldn’t think of anything that I had done to deserve this.

I didn’t remember overtaxing or starving or mistreating any of the towns-people. I was so frustrated about not knowing that I almost started to cry.

Then I heard something.......... A huge rumbling ......and the ground began to shake!

" Well, well, well... true love conquers all, eh dearie?"

Much to my surprise there was a witch standing in the dungeon. She looked just like that witch that was melted by her own potion in the forest all those years ago.

How could she be alive?, I thought.

"I’m her sister, dearie. You killed my sister, you little snot, and now I’m going to kill you. Your Chrisalot will be no match for my Purple dragon! And I can read minds so watch what you think.... you just might offend me."

Outside, another rumble told me that the dragon was still alive and my Chrisalot was bravely trying to fight it off. I started to wonder how he knew I was trapped here and the witch answered my thoughts.

"I sent a message with my rat to the market place of Fremont. The message said that you would be killed here unless the bravest knight in all the land was to come for you. I knew no one else would step forward. And when the market people said you were the girl in the dungeon, there was no doubt your knight wouldn’t leave his precious love to die."

Just then, the ground shook and there was a mighty roar followed by an eerie silence. The witch raced from the room muttering something under her breath about how useless dragons were for fighting nowadays.

I knew my Chrisalot was coming for me so I tried to untie the ropes around my wrists and ankles but it was no use. There was nothing to cut them with and they were too tight.

I saw a winding staircase and started to plan an escape while I kept working at the ropes. Just as I was starting to make progress, Chrisalot burst through the door!! ( His best class in knight school was Nic-of-Timing.....go figure)

He cut the ropes off and, as I was busy trying to tell him that I had just seen the witch run to the other side of the door, he grabbed the nearest torch and started all the hay on the floor on fire!

"What are you doing!" I said, "The witch......"

" -Oh, I killed her outside.....she turned herself into a dragon."

"But....."

" It’s okay, I know what I’m....."

SLAM!!!!!

Just then the door shut and the witch was ginning on the other side. The side that was not on fire.

"Why didn’t you tell me she was still here?!", he said.

"Oh, that’s right! "It’s my fault you don’t listen to a word I say...., "You’re just a princess, Heatherine. "Well, I never...."Oh stop looking around like an idiot.... The stairs, the stairs!!!!!" ( I don’t usually get rough with him but he cracks under pressure and sometimes it’s needed)

I grabbed a rusty old torture hook off the dungeon floor and led Chrisalot up the staircase. (He was slightly confused at this point and I don’t think he noticed the hook until I tossed it out the window)

Like I said, I tied the hook to some rope (there was a strange abundance of rope in this place) and threw it out he window and in the general direction of a large tree. You can imagine my surprise when it landed perfectly and caught snuggly on a branch.

So we swung to safety and ran to front gate and locked it shut just in case the witch was still inside and ran home. On our way I told Chrisalot everything about the witch and her sister.

"It was you!!!" he said.

He pulled me into a deep embrace and we lived the rest of our lives in peace and harmony.

(No details after the embrace- that’s all you’re getting! Hmph...nosey....)

The End