Mark Eklund
He was in the first third grade class I taught at Saint Mary's School
in Morris, Minnesota. All 34 of my students were dear to me, but Mark
Eklund was one in a million. Very neat in appearance, but had that
happy-to-be-alive attitude that made even his occasional
mischievousness delightful.
Mark talked incessantly. I had to remind him again and again that
talking without permission was not acceptable. What impressed me so
much, though, was his sincere response every time I had to correct
him for misbehaving -- "Thank you for correcting me, Sister!"
I didn't know what to make of it at first but, before long, I became
accustomed to hearing it many times a day.
One morning, my patience was growing thin when Mark talked once too often,
and then I made a novice-teacher's mistake. I looked at him and said,
"If you say one more word, I am going to tape your mouth shut!"
It wasn't ten seconds later when Chuck blurted out, "Mark is talking again."
I hadn't asked any of the students to help me watch Mark, but since I had
stated the punishment in front of the class, I had to act on it.
I remember the scene as if it had occurred this morning. I walked to
my desk, very deliberately opened my drawer and took out a roll of
masking tape. Without saying a word, I proceeded to Mark's desk,
tore off two pieces of tape and made a big X with them over his mouth.
I then returned to the front of the room.
As I glanced at Mark to see how he was doing, he winked at me. That
did it! I started laughing. The class cheered as I walked back to Mark's
desk, removed the tape, and shrugged my shoulders.
His first words were, "Thank you for correcting me, Sister."
At the end of the year, I was asked to teach junior-high math. The years
flew by and, before I knew it, Mark was in my classroom again. He was
more handsome than ever and just as polite. Since he had to listen
carefully to my instructions in the "new math," he did not talk as much
in ninth grade as he had in the third.
One Friday, things just didn't feel right. We had worked hard on a new
concept all week, and I sensed that the students were frowning, frustrated
with themselves -- and edgy with one another.
I had to stop this crankiness before it got out of hand. So I asked them
to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper,
leaving a space between each name. Then I told them to think of the nicest
thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.
It took the remainder of the class period to finish the assignment and,
as the students left the room, each one handed me the papers.
Charlie smiled. Mark said, "Thank you for teaching me, Sister. Have a good weekend."
That Saturday, I wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of
paper, and I listed what everyone else had said about that individual. On
Monday, I gave each student his or her list.
Before long, the entire class was smiling. "Really?" I heard whispered.
"I never knew that meant anything to anyone!" "I didn't know others
liked me so much!"
No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. I never knew if they
discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter.
The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with
themselves and one another again.
That group of students moved on. Several years later, after I returned from
vacation, my parents met me at the airport. As we were driving home, Mother
asked me the usual questions about my trip -- the weather, my experiences
in general. There was a slight lull in the conversation.
Mother gave Dad a side-ways glance and simply said, "Dad?" My father cleared
his throat as he usually did before something important. "The Eklunds called
last night," he began. "Really?" I said. "I haven't heard from them in years.
I wonder how Mark is."
Dad responded quietly. "Mark was killed in Vietnam," he said. "The funeral
is tomorrow, and his parents would like it if you could attend."
To this day, I can still point to the exact spot on I-494 where Dad told
me about Mark.
I had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. Mark looked so
handsome, so mature. All I could think at that moment was, "Mark, I would
give all the masking tape in the world if only you would talk to me again."
The church was packed with Mark's friends. Chuck's sister sang "The Battle
Hymn of the Republic."
Why did it have to rain on the day of the funeral? It was difficult enough
at the graveside.
The pastor said the usual prayers, and the bugler played taps.
One by one, those who loved Mark took a last walk by the coffin and sprinkled
it with holy water.
I was the last one to bless the coffin. As I stood there, one of the soldiers
who had acted as pallbearer came up to me.
"Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked.
I nodded as I continued to stare at the coffin.
"Mark talked about you a lot," he said.
After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates headed to Chuck's farmhouse
for lunch. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting for me. "We
want to show you something," his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket.
"They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it."
Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper
that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. I knew without
looking that the papers were the ones on which I had listed all the good things
each of Mark's classmates had said about him.
"Thank you so much for doing that" Mark's mother said. "As you can see, Mark
treasured it."
Mark's classmates started to gather around us. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly
and said, "I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home."
Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album."
"I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary."
Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet
and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. "I carry this with me at all
times," Vicki said without batting an eyelash. "I think we all saved our lists."
That's when I finally sat down and cried. I cried for Mark and for all his friends
who would never see him again.
Written by: Sister Helen P. Mrosia
Note:
The purpose of this story is to encourage everyone to compliment the people you
love and care about. We often forget the importance of showing our affection and
love. Sometimes, the smallest of things could mean the most to another.
Please spread the message and encouragement, and express your love and caring by
complimenting and being open with communication. The density of people in society
is so thick that we forget life will end one day. And we don't know when that one
day will be. So please, I beg of you, tell the people you love and care for that
they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late. I leave these
messages with you and ask you to continue to spread them to everyone you know.
|