We put an ad in the paper after arguing for hours over what it was going to say. It wasn’t like we were that picky, just a non-smoker, around our age, who could afford the rent. We were even accommodating- welcoming small pets- mainly because Jana and I were too indecisive to get one of our own. I wanted a cat and she would only go for a dog. As soon as the ad ran we started getting calls, and then we had the interviews. That was an experience that I hope to never have again.
We met Beth first, she seemed nice enough, but her boyfriend scared the shit out of us. As they left, I commented to Jana, "They both have their tongues pierced…how can they kiss without getting the studs tangled up?" She just shook her head and said that she didn’t even want to know. On second thought, I really didn’t want to know either.
Scott came next. He was cute- tall with dark hair and dark eyes, but he smoked like a chimney. Plus, he reminded me of one of those frat boys Jana and I spent a lot of time avoiding on campus. So he was ruled out too.
I wasn’t quite sure what to think of our third interview when we could hear the car approaching before we could see it. Jana and I were peeking out the window to see where the hell all the noise was coming from when we realized- it was the green Durango speeding down the street- then pulling into our drive, after driving past the house once. I gasped when I watched the guy jump out of the truck; he got my vote before we even talked to him. My god, he was GORGEOUS. After we did talk to him, not only did I want him to move in; I wanted him to move into MY room. We found out that Nick traveled a lot and had four pugs- he even brought pictures of them! So cute! He had his own house already, but said it was kind of stupid to leave this huge house empty nine months out of the year, and it got lonely, just him and the dogs. I was thinking that I’d be happy to keep him company any time that he wanted…I think that Jana knew what was going through my mind, she sent me to go grab drinks about then. As he left, Jana and I watched him walk back out to the truck (hello, ghetto booty!), hiding behind the curtains, I told her to forget the rest of the interviews, we’d just found our housemate. She rolled her eyes and told me to take a cold shower.
Chrissy was the fourth interview. I tried my best to act bored when she was there, but when she explained her story; I found it hard not to be interested. Apparently, she had this psychotic ex who was, like, stalking her and she had to find someplace to start over. She also had to massive German Shepherds- for protection, I guess, and we were kind of worried that they’d destroy our backyard, which we were fond of just the way it was.
Our last interview was with Jenna, whom I immediately did not like. A pregnant college student (my first thought was WHORE) with three cats that only liked her. She was basically a spoiled rich kid that got booted out of the house for "disgracing the family", but dad had been very liberal with the cash flow to keep her gone. I couldn’t blame her dad; I wanted her out of our house as soon as possible, too.
Pretty much, it was down to Nick and Chrissy. Well, for me it was down to Nick, but Jana, ever the softy that she is, really wanted to help out Chrissy. I didn’t really have a problem with her, she was nice and all, but I mean, really, a girl with a psychopath on her case, or quite possibly the most beautiful guy I’ve ever laid eyes on. Hmm…which would I rather see running around the house in their underwear?!?
I tried to come up with every possible bad thing I could think of to make Jana see that Nick was really the one that we wanted- I pointed out Chrissy’s weirdo could find us and kill us or that the dogs could destroy everything… Jana told me to hush and we’d figure things out later.
Later that evening, the phone rang while Jana and I was watching ‘Varsity Blues’ for the 6,000th time. I made no attempt to get the phone; I was not about to take my eyes off of Mox’s ass in those amazing jeans. Jana grabbed the phone, "Hello?… Oh, hi…Oh, really? No, that’s fine…really…it’s cool…that’s good…yeah, thanks…good luck to you…Okay…bye." She looked at me and said, "That was Chrissy. She found some place else to live."
It took awhile for what she said to register. Then it sunk in, HOT DAMN, Nick was moving in! I jumped out of my chair, suddenly unconcerned with Mox’s fine ass and started squealing.
"Gimme the phone! I wanna call Nick!"
Jana just laughed at me. "You don’t have his number. If you recall, he gave it to ME," she said, smirking.
I whacked her with a pillow, "Hand it over!"
She jumped off the couch and ran down the hall, "Never!"
I chased her into the spare bedroom, back down the hall, out onto the deck, down the steps, into the basement, and back up into the kitchen. "I will chase you all over this damn house, GIVE ME HIS NUMBER!!!!"
Jana hopped up on the counter and shrieked, "FINE! It’s taped on the inside of my address book!"
I took off down the hall and into her room, grabbing the address book, snagging the yellow post-it note that was taped on the inside cover. I went into my room, closed the door, flopped down on the bed and took a deep breath. I dialed the number that was sloppily scrawled on the paper, obviously not Jana’s perfect penmanship, and waited. After about twenty rings, I heard someone completely out of breath gasp something that sounded like "Hello?"
"Hi, is this Nick?"
"Yeah, who is this?"
"Hey, this is Chelle…" I started to explain who I was, but I got cut off.
"Oh yeah! I was hoping that one of you would call…well, assuming that you’re telling me that you hated all the other people you were interviewing and I get to move in."
I giggled, "We didn’t hate them, but yes, I’m telling you that you get to move in."
"Cool. Is next Monday all right?" He asked.
Whoa, that was soon…but who was I to complain? "Yep, that’s just fine."
"All right, see ya then."
I hung up and promptly got up, ran downstairs, swooned and fell over on the couch next to Jana.
She looked at me and said, "Either you just had really quick phone sex or he said he was moving in."
"Ohhh, hadn’t thought of the phone sex…" I paused, "but why settle for that when I can have the real thing…when he moves in…on Monday."
"He’s moving in on Monday? That’s, like, less than a week away!"
I grinned, "Thank god."
~*~*~*~
Jana spent the next few days freaking out- Scotch-Guarding all of our furniture and carpet against potential pug pee stains, trying to clean everything imaginable (who cleans steps with a toothbrush?!?) and re-organizing all the "girlie" things in the house, trying to make the house more ‘guy-friendly’ or something. I just lay around and laugh at her- it’s not like he wasn’t going to figure out we aren’t that clean all the time really quick, and I’m sure he’s encountered PMS at some point in his life.
Monday finally rolled around, and around 10:30 in the morning, Nick and the pugs arrived in his Durango, followed by a moving van. Nick brought the dogs in the house and they immediately scattered in four different directions, sniffing everything in sight, and then peeing on the rug in the bathroom, the one thing that Jana hadn’t thought to try to protect. I snatched the rug and threw it into the washing machine, and grabbed the leaky pug. I looked at its collar, "Hey Houston. You’re gonna have to learn not to do that pretty quick, or Jana’s gonna have you wearing a doggie diaper."
"CHEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEE!" Jana hollered from outside.
I dropped Houston on my bed, praying she wouldn’t pee on it too and ran downstairs, tripping over another pug in the process. I made it outside, to be greeted by Jana telling the guys from the moving company where to take everything and Nick climbing around in the back of his Durango, moving boxes to take inside. I just watched him for a second, how could I not admire this picture? Him on his hands and knees, perfect view of his ass…
"Oh, hi Chelle," Nick said, turning around and blushing, when he caught me very shamelessly staring at his ass.
I smiled, "Hey, what can I help you with?" I doubt he realized exactly what I had in mind, but I went ahead and carried in the boxes that he handed me. I set them down in the living room; we had yet to figure out where we were going to put him. Jana and I had left the master bedroom empty when we moved in, opting for the two similar sized bedrooms, making things fair, and rather that fighting over whom got the biggest room and a bathroom to themselves. Jana had suggested that we give the master bedroom to Nick, so that he wouldn’t have to share a bathroom with one of us. I’d said that maybe he wouldn’t mind. I couldn’t say I exactly minded the thought of "accidentally" walking in on him in the shower. Once again, I was told to take a cold shower.
Four more trips back to his house, Nick finally said that he had everything. We could no longer walk through the living room, but he was technically moved in. I declaring it was break time and ordered a pizza. Jana and Nick went to look at the bedrooms and decide which would be his. I grabbed another pug, Mikey this time, on my way up the steps after getting off the phone with the pizza place to eavesdrop on the conversation. Nick insisted that it wasn’t necessary to give him the master bedroom, but after assessing how much stuff he’d brought, it quickly became obvious that it was the only place that everything would fit. Jana and I both said it was fine, and I added that he just couldn’t protest if he walked in and found one of us in the Jacuzzi in his bathroom sometime. He smiled and mumbled something that sounded like; "I should only be so lucky."
The pizza arrived and quickly disappeared and we chatted as we ate out on the deck, looking over the ocean. Nick said that he had a boat and a Jet Ski that he’d like to bring over at some point if that was all right with us. Jana and I both agreed, of course. We’d have to have been crazy to refuse any opportunity that could have resulted in him being wet.
The three of us somehow managed to get pretty much everything moved into his room and we didn't even step on any pugs in the process. I had to admit I was both fascinated and amused with his taste in "decorating" or at least the things he'd brought with him to make the house look more like he lived there. Jana’s mom called while we were in the middle of helping him unpack. She went to take the call, while I sprawled out on Nick’s bed and entertained thoughts of what it would be like to be on it with him, while I tried to sneak peeks at everything he pulled out of the boxes.
I saw various shirts that I would no doubt be trying to borrow at some point, about a million pairs of tennis shoes, sketch pads, notebooks, drumsticks, video games, a few awards, pictures of him and his family and friends, and an entire box of nothing but dog toys. He dumped them out on the floor, and called all four pugs- Mikey, Willie, Houston and Nicky into the room. The dogs immediately appeared and I cracked up laughing. Not only because they seemed to have just morphed through the walls to get there, but that one of them was named Nicky. "Should I even ask why one of your dogs is named after you?"
Nick looked up at me from the floor where he was playing with the dogs and laughed. "I know, it sounds conceited…everyone thinks that. It was more just that I hate being called Nicky, so whenever someone called Nicky, and they were talking to me…they would end up with a dog instead."
I smiled, "Very clever. Mind if I join you down there?"
"Come on down," he said, scooting over and clearing away some of the dog toys.
‘Don’t tempt me,’ I thought as I plopped down next to him and grabbed a pug to play with.
Later that night, after Jana had finally managed to get off the phone and we had all had a midnight snack of ice cream on the deck, I went into Jana’s room to talk to her as she got ready for bed. "What do you think?"
"I think you need another cold shower."
"Whhhhhaaaaaaaatttttttttt?" I asked, whining.
"God, he’s barely moved in and you’re already all over him," she said, pulling back the covers on her bed.
I made a face at her, "Phfft!"