Warnings : Angst, Twisted ppl with twisted ideas (no I am not talking about me! *glare*), Harsh language and the first chapter is lemonish while the last chapter is Lemon *goes red* Ah almost forgot there's probably some OOC in there too *nods*
I'll let you get on with the fic but first I just have to say that I'm swedish which means that english is not my first language so please have that in mind when you weep from the bad spelling and the grama-errors…
TELL ME TO STOP
Chapter 4 - Rescued
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When you feel all alone
And a loyal friend is hard to find
You're caught in a one way street
With the monsters in your head
When hopes and dreams are far away and
And you feel like you can't face the day
Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash and burn
You're not alone
-Savage Garden, Crash and Burn-
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Bars, bars every where. Her new owner had put her in a cage in the middle of a large field. Now he was staring at her as she curled up to cover her naked body.
"Come here," he ordered. When she didn't move he narrowed his eyes and snarled at her. "Listen here girl. We can do this the easy way or the hard way. You better behave yourself or nasty things will happen, understand? Now play nice and do as you're told!" he hissed at her. She wanted to cry. She wanted to call for help. But just as before no words left her open mouth. This was a nightmare. That horrible man owned her and who knew what he was going to do with her. Beat her? Kill her? Rape her? Shaking from fear she curled up trying to disappear from the world. Her body did the only thing it could do to find an escape from the horrible reality and slowly dragged her into an unconsciousness kind of sleep. But not even there was she completely safe anymore. Nightmares of savages who used, abused and beat her made the young women scream in her sleep but then suddenly it all stopped. A man entered her terrifying dreams and chased away all the bad things. He was tall, slender, his voice calm and collected. She couldn't make out what he said nor see his face because he hid it under his hood and a mask but there was something about him that made her frown in her sleep. She should know this man, she should be able to remember his name. But as soon as she was close enough to reach out her hand to grab a hold of the memory she needed it slipped away. Without warning a woman appeared behind the man she could not remember. The strange woman's face was split in two. One ugly side and one pleasent. It was this two-faced woman who broke the silence that had fallen.
"You have to wake up Amelia," she mumbled. Her voice sounded as if it came from a place far far away and had a strange echo like there were more than one person talking. "Amelia wake up!"
"I can't, I don't dare to!" the young woman screamed and shivered when she heard her own voice. "I can speak again."
"Of course you can Amelia. This is a dream and you can do anything in your dreams," The beautiful side of the woman smiled. "But right now you have to wake up."
"Why? I'm scared. There's a bad bad man out there," she whimpered.
"We know Amelia but if you don't wake up now you might not wake up at all. You're very sick so you need to try to stay awake until Zelgadis can reach you." The young woman looked at the man whom she could not put a name on.
"Is he Zelgadis?"
"Yes Amelia he is and he's trying to get to you as fast as he can. Now please wake up or all he will find is your body," the two-faced woman urged her.
"Do you promise he'll come?" she almost cried.
"We promise Amelia, we promise… But you have got to wake up! NOW!"
She looked around and tried to remember the strange dream. Someone was coming to help her, someone had to be coming to help her. Carefully she wrapped her arms around herself and stared at the road leading past her cage. A young man came walking up to her and with a soundless scream of joy she pressed her sore body against the bars and stretched out her hands towards him. He stopped just out of her reach and eyed her up and down. She didn't understand. Why didn't he rescue her? Why didn't he come closer? She tried to talk to him but the only sounds that escaped her were low whimpers. Please help me! she screamed inside her head. But he didn't help her instead he got a hungry look on his young face and then he turned around and left. It only took a day for her to realize that he wasn't the first nor the last to approache her cage to stare at her naked body. After a few days she stopped trying to get them to help her and just sat in the middle of the filthy cage hugging herself. The dreams had been lying, no one was coming to save her, no one cared, no one knew her. The minutes that dragged themselves past her turned to hours and the hours to days.
If she had been able to remember how to count she would have known she had been there for over a week when a tall slender man entered the town hiding under a hood and a mask. That morning it was so difficult for her to wake up when she dozed off and even more difficult to stay awake. She pushed away the food and didn't even try to get away from the scornfull man who owned her. The pounding in her head was almost drowning out all sounds and made her vision foggy. With a hopless longing she observed the people who past her by but they didn't look at her anymore. Suddenly a man, who she had seen giving her a look when he walked by, turned around and headed her way. He carefully approched her prison but unlike all the others he didn't stop until he was very close. Scared and disoriented by fever she threw herself to the other side of the cage. When he removed the hood and the mask she could see a face that was not human and still kinder than any face she could remember.
"Amelia," he whispered with tears in his blue eyes and reached out his hand to her. All she wanted was to crawl over to him and hang on to that hand for the rest of her life but the world was spinning. Her body felt so heavy, her head so strange and her eyes refused to stay open. Without being able to even race her hand she felt herself fall away from reality.
It was quiet and dark. She could feel someone touching her but it didn't scare her for the touch was gentle and caring. Her subconscious demanded her attention so she turned away from the flicker of reality that penetrated her coma-like sleep. It took a while for her to adjust to the darkness that surrounded her but when she did she could see a road. Back and forth splinters of her lost memory past her by. Slowly and carefully she stretched out her hand to grab one of them. The splinter, containing a picture of a young women with black hair and big blue eyes, dodged her hand and hurried away. She frowned and stepped closer. With a low growl she reached out for another splinter of memory but just as the previous one this one escaped.
"Don't try so hard Amelia," a voice whispered from the darkness behind her. "The memories will come in due time. Right now you have to focus on getting better."
"Who are you?" she asked without turning around.
"I'm you Amelia," the voice answered slowly. "Or at least a part of you."
"What happened to me?" The voice kept quiet long enough for her to think it had left her alone again.
"You're very sick Amelia. You got hit over the head several times."
"Who's the man who rescued me?"
"You sure are full of questions aren't you?" the voice sighed. "I can't answer all of them, there isn't enough time but he is the one who will save you from all this." Amelia frowned. Well that didn't help her much.
"Amelia," she said out loud and frowned again. The name didn't seem completely unfamilier but it didn't ring any bells either.
"Now wake up Amelia!" the voice demanded. "You've been gone for hours and hours…"
Zelgadies sighed and pulled his cloak tighter around Amelia and checked her pulse again. For the last hour it had improved and he figured she would wake up soon. What would he say to her when she woke up?
"She won't even know who I am," he moaned quietly. That was his biggest fear now that the Princess seemed to be out of danger. Nothing hurt his heart more at the moment then the thought of Amelia being afraid of him. A low sound from the young woman pulled his attention back to reality. Slow and unsure she opened her big blue eyes and looked at him. Zelgadis took a step back so that he wouldn't frighten her. She looked at him but to his relief she didn't have the scared panic in her eyes anymore. Instead she reached out her hand to him. The chimera hesitated for a second before he came closer, sat down and carefully took the young woman's hand in his.
"Amelia?" he asked softly. A flicker of recognition shone in her eyes as she grabbed his hand tighter. "Do you remember me?" he tried instead. The Princess seemed to be thinking for a moment before she nodded. "Do you know my name?" Again she seemed to be thinking but then shook her head. Zel sighed. Amelia didn't seem to remember much of anything and she had for some reason lost her ability to speak. This is my fault, he sighed inside. If he hadn't let her go she would be doing fine.
"Dr…D-dr…" she tried. The chimera frowned and brushed away some hair from her pale face.
"What are you trying to say Amelia?" The young woman narrowed her eyes and thought for a moment.
"Dr-m," she studdered with great effort.
"Dream?" he asked in confusion and got a smile and a nod. "What dream?" Amelia frowned and sighed. It was obvious this was very difficult for her.
"Dr-m… t-t-l… com…" Zelgadis thought for a moment, trying to understand her.
"Dream? Tell? Come?" he tried. She smiled again and then pointed to him.
"Dr-m t-l," she nodded then pointed to him again, "c-m."
"A dream told you I was coming?" Zel raised an eyebrow. How was that possible. Amelia nodded and seemed to be beside herself from joy that he understood her.
"Tell m-me ta wa-wa-t," the Princess explained in her newfound staggering speach.
"It told you to wait?" She nodded for the third time and pulled his hand. "What is it Amelia?" Instead of trying to answer the young woman crawled into his lap and pressed her beaten body close to him. The chimera froze but shook it off. This was no time to be reserved so he carefully wrapped his arms around her shivering body.
"Cold!" she said emphatically. He had his Amelia in his arms, nothing else mattered at that moment. Her naked body, only covered up by his cloak, was firmly pressed against his chest and her head rested against his shoulder. Several minutes passed before he realized the fragile Princess had fallen asleep. It would have been more like him to quickly put her down on the ground but he just couldn't. He didn't want to disturb her sleep and he certainly didn't want to let her go, not now not ever.
It had been a strange five days since he had rescued Amelia. The Princess spoke better with each new day but her memory was still playing tricks on her. The chimera was confused, a little bit scared and completely captivated by how the young woman always seemed to be right next to him. Her constant presens, her trusting touch and caress made him nervous and often left him blushing from head to toe. When Amelia lost her memory she had also lost all the restrictions about what was allowed and what wasn't. It didn't occure to her that walking beside Zelgadis leaning into his slender body was unsuitible nor did she for a second see anything wrong in asking him to hold her when she was cold. This new side of the Princess of Seyruun made Zel nervous but even more so it made his body long more and more for hers. He should have said no, refuse to go along with her innocent requests but he just couldn't. For so long he had denied that he had feelings and desires for this young woman and now his body and mind simply refused to keep them hidden. Not that he wanted them to remain hidden. No he wanted her close, wanted to feel her body pressed against his when she was asleep. Zel didn't understand why, and he didn't try to either, instead he just kept on telling himself that Amelia, due to her memory loss, was like a child and saw him as a father or older brother. At nightfall on the sixth day Zelgadis sat by a fire and watched Amelia as she studied the starlit sky.
"Zel?" Zelgadis had been too difficult for her to say at first so she had used the shorter form, so unlike her real self.
"Yeah," he mumbled and saw how she got up and came towards him.
"Do the stars look the same ev'where?" The chimera thought for a moment.
"I guess so. I haven't been everywhere so I can't be sure." The Princess frowned at his answer and sat down beside him. Again she turned her blue eyes to the sky.
"Why are you so sad?" she asked next without taking her eyes from the stars. Zelgadis twitched at the question. How was he supposed to answer that? Better to run for cover than to fight badly, he sighed to himself.
"It's time for bed," he muttered and got up. To his surprise Amelia grabbed his arm and pulled him down again.
"Zel I'm not a child even if my mem'ries are few," she frowned at him. "You can either wait until I 'member myself or just tell me!" The seriousness in her voice surprised him more than her question. Since he had rescued her she had never once acted like a grown up but now he could clearly see in her eyes that she was nothing less than an adult.
"Because I'm a freak, a chimera," he sighed. The young woman met his eyes and shook her head.
"Why do you equal chimera with freak? Do you find yourself so ugly, so repulsive?" she asked with a strange tone in her voice. He didn't want to answer this questions and he certainly didn't want to have this conversation but he had a feeling Amelia wouldn't let him off so easily. When he saw how she calmly waited for his answer he got angry.
"How easy for you to be judging!" he almost screamed at her. "You're human and beautiful, while I'm a walking blue rock! To people I'll always be a freak, an ugly horrible freak!" He was done screaming and yelling at her now so he just glared at her. The Princess hadn't even moved a muscle.
"Is that what you think? You are so wrong Zel, so very wrong," she sighed after a moments silence. "You might look unusual, maybe even scary to someone who doesn't know you but on the inside you're the same as ev'body else."
"On the inside I'm just as stony as I am on the outside!" he barked and felt how his heart sank inside him. If the words Amelia spoke only were true, then maybe she could love him but words were just words.
"I see…" she answered slowly and eyed him up and down. "If you really are made of stone on the inside then how come you get so nervous when I'm close to you? How come you shiver every time I touch you?" The chimera stared at the woman who for days had seemed so innocent and unknowing. Beside him sat not a child but a woman, a woman who was on to him by the looks of it. When he didn't answer she came closer to him. His pulse started pounding as her face appeared just infront of his own. Then just as he was about to protest Amelia kissed him, softly and slowly. Zel found himself leaning into the kiss and answering it before his brain had any chance to understand what was going on.
"No Zel you are all human inside and out," the Princess mumbled after pulling away from his face. "It's a shame you refuse to admitt it." With those words she left him alone with his questions, fears and desires. All sounds of the night seemed to be on a break. Nothing surrounded him but silence. Then suddently he heard a dry chuckle that he knew came from his subconsciousness. 1 - 0 to the Princess, it mocked him inside his head.
"Oh shut up!" He was very irritated and confused now. What exactly did Amelia mean? How much did she understand even though almost all her memories were gone? Could she be right? What if he was all human? You know it wouldn't kill you to listen to her for a change, his subconsciousness remarked.
"That's easy for you to say," he snorted. "It's not you who have to live with hurting her." Oh stop that! This time the voice was harsh. You don't know if you will actually hurt her so don't even try to hide behind that. What you're really afraid of is that she won't love you. Zelgadis lowered his head. That was partially true even though he tried to deny it. With a sigh the chimera followed Amelia.
Amelia frowned and stomped her feet. What was she doing that was so wrong? If she only could remember everything.
"Why is he so convinced he's ugly and unhuman?" she asked the dark woods around her. "Can't he see that I really do care for him?" The trees ignored her and her questions. She was tired of not knowing, of not understanding. Perhaps her real self had been mean to him. After pondering that for a moment she shook her head. No if the chimera hadn't cared for her at all he wouldn't have come after her. And if she didn't care for him then why had she had dreams about him? It just didn't make any sense.
"Amelia?" He was looking for her. She was just about to answer when something huge appeared infront of her. There was something familiar about the creature's silhouette but her fear for it pushed away the small flash of memory. With a scream she turned around and fled. As she ran she could hear it hunting after her. Then suddenly Zelgadis was there. He pulled her behind him and threw a spell after whatever it was that came running towards them.
"Are you okay?" he panted and hugged her. For a moment she just hid in his arms trembling with fear.
"I, I think so," she mumbled without lifting her face from his shoulder. "What was that?"
"A troll. Are you sure you're alright?" When the Princess didn't answer he carefully shook her. "Amelia?"
"Daddy," she sighed. The memories almost drowned her. The silhouette of that troll reminded her of her father. She was the Princess of Seyruun. Zel's full name was Zelgadis Greywords. They had destroyed DarkStar with Lina Inverse and Gourry Gabriev. Zel had been turned into a chimera by Rezo the Red Priest. It all came back to her. "I remember," she screamed with joy and threw her arms around the surprised chimera. "I remember everything!"
Chapter5