"THIS TIME AROUND"
By: gb
Chapter 40
* Special guest star-
from General Hospital, Sean Donnelly- WSB Secret Agent (as played by John Reilly)
Sean Donnelly opened the door to his posh townhouse for Alex and waited for her to look around and get comfortable...as comfortable as secret agents always on their guards could ever get. She looked at him now and kissed his still ruggedly handsome, but older face hello- a gesture he repeated on both of her cheeks.
"How's Tiffany? Where's Tiffany?" she asked, referring to Sean's glamourous but loveable former movie star wife.
"She's fine and she's taken Sean Jr. and little Cheryl out for most of the day, so we're alone. Just relax." he said easily.
"You, Sean Donnelly, the eternal spy and bachelor now a husband and father...and loving every minute of it." Alex remarked to him with long held affection.
"Yeah, well, time does march on for all of us." he smiled wryly as if he couldn't believe his life now either and she could tell that he was pleased with his current life after all those years of having to be alone to do the job that he loved but that had robbed him of having anything else.
"I haven't been able to think about anything else since you called," he said getting right to the point and handing her a club soda. "Well, were you right? Was it him?"
Alex flashed him a stare. "It's him." she confirmed.
"Damn it!" he swore.
"Calm down." Alex said, pushing her hair behind her ear and taking a sip of her drink.
"Calm down?" asked Sean. "Are you kidding?! Do you know what this means? Just your luck to fall in love and marry his wife's cousin. And this is the first time you're seeing him again? You've been at Wildwind for awhile now."
"Yeah, but Sean, they were divorced- living apart and not seeing each other at all. What was I supposed to do? Tell her to take me to him so I can get a look even though her heart was broken and she was dealing with a miscarriage? I don't know what to say- the thought of it being him just never occurred to me."
Sean nodded.
He then asked, "Did he recognize you?"
"No," she told him. "I mean, he has this feeling, but I've been able to redirect him so far."
"Alex, he sounds like a smart young man." Sean noted to her.
"Oh, absolutely. It's in his blood."
"Then it will only be a matter of time before he puts things together."
"Oh, I think I can handle it for now," said Alex. "Besides, neither Anna or I resemble our
former selves."
"You and Anna," Sean remarked slowly. "Like a pair of bookends."
"How does Ryan look?" asked Sean as Anna took al look around the large penthouse and then put down her glass.
"Oh, like a first class movie star! Tall, well-muscled, gorgeous face and blue eyes- so much like Mary's eyes."
"what if he figures it out, Alex?" asked Sean, not really interested in her idol worship type of description.
"Well, we'll just have to see that he doesn't," Alex now said. "It wouldn't do him and
Gillian any good if he did."
"Duke is not going to like this at all," said Sean. "And Ryan can never know about him."
Alex sighed as if the burden of the whole matter was getting to her at last and she was beginning to doubt her decision to go along with set plans. "You know, Sean, sometimes I wonder about that. I mean, it's been a long time now and he hardly keeps the same company he did once."
"All the same, that's not our decision," insisted Sean. "By the way, what about Gillian? All this time and she still has no idea?"
"I told you, I've changed too much. Besides, those last few years, Maxim always had her in those schools- we never saw each other. Then I was made to leave. She's much too young to remember."
"She's never going to understand, Alex, if she ever finds out." Sean warned her.
"Well, she's never going to find out."
"And the Dutchess?" asked Sean.
"Eugenia was thoroughly disappointed in Maxim and how he turned out and with good reason. She wasn't even present at the wedding. Gillian went to be with her at times, but I never really saw her. I don't think she's going to be a problem."
"Didn't you miss her all these years, Alex?" Sean wondered.
"More than I can tell you," she admitted quietly, full of emotion. "She's turned out so beautiful, so loving."
"And her marriage to Ryan- what can we do about that?" asked Sean.
"What CAN we do?" replied Alex. "They're in love."
"And they don't remember anything about-"
"Oh, Sean, that was alot of years ago," Alex said knowing right away what he was going to ask. "Gillian was an infant- she remember. As for Ryan, he was older, but never saw me up close and he won't remember a child."
"I don't suppose there's a chance that those two will go their own ways anytime soon?" asked Sean hopefully. "For their own sakes?"
"Those two?" asked Alex. "They're head over heels and it shows. It's like watching a Mills and Boon romance come to life."
Sean looked at her, confused.
"Romance novel- we have those in England." informed Alex.
"Oh." he nodded.
"Really, Sean. They're utterly devoted to each other! It's the real thing. They wouldn't give each other up now if their lives depended on it!"
"What do you mean now? How real was their split?"
"Oh, that was real. They lost a child and there were other people involved, but they fought their way back. You know, I saw Gillian during that time- she was like a zombie! I knew then that Ryan was the only one who could bring her back. My heart was breaking for her and I couldn't even tell her- you don't know how difficult that was! Sean, I'm happy for them!"
"You're not serious! Come on, Alex, put the romance novel away! You know how serious a situation this is- there is real danger here!"
"Sean, there is nothing to be done. They've met, they were married, they ARE wild about each other. Gillian and Ryan are happy! They come apart now and it will kill them!"
Sean started to pace the room in agitation.
"We'll just have to be really careful with them and hope for the best- what can I say except that it was meant to be." she said more calmly now.
"This wouldn't have happened if I'd paid more attention to them," argued Sean. "They should've never met...we'll have to tell Duke."
"There's something else, Sean," she now said and he stopped pacing and looked at her.
"I wasn't sure at first, but now I am. Things are about to get more complicated."
"What?" asked Sean in a worried tone and Alex prayed his legendary temper which was tightly reined only in public and on an official job, would not be unleashed.
Calmly, she told him and both of them braced themselves for what was ahead...
...In the living room of a small house, a woman was holding onto a small girl about two years and talking to anxiously to a man who was obviously a several years older than her.
The woman was hard to see- she was wearing a scarf that covered her head and dark glasses, but she was a woman of means as could be seen by her elegant, well kept hands and fancy looking rings and bracelets.
The little girl was in a simple, sleeveless dress made of expensive looking material. She was a breathtaking child with thick, shiny, dark hair and equally dark, alert eyes.
Two boys were also in the room but their appearance was not so nice.
Both were in old jeans and rumpled shirts and dirty looking shoes. They were not smiling, but looked almost scared.
The younger boy appeared about ten or so with thin, almost scrawny looking limbs and sad blue eyes as if he might have been crying recently. The older boy was only just a few years older and looked more angry than sad. His body was in better shape than the other child. The woman said something that was in low tones- too low to be heard clearly. The older man's voice could be heard well as he grumbled irritatedly, "Oh, hell, he's always fallin' and hurtin' something! Can't put two feet together to save his life- neither one of them can! Most useless two kids you ever saw!"
There was an open bottle of beer on the corner coffee table. The younger boy had a split lip with dried, caked blood under it and a bruise was already forming on the skin around it.
The woman looked again at him and pursed her lips but her eyes couldn't be seen behind her glasses. As she returned her attention back to the man, the little girl in her arms started to look around and found the two boys, but it was the younger boy who held her attention.
She stared at him and he, in turn, was held captive in her glance. She did not see his poor appearance and turn in discust the way most people did, but instead, gave him a grin that made his heart skip a beat and then leap to his throat!
He was struck by her innocence and a strange feeling of good flowed through him.
She continued to smile at him and her hands now held out for him, so instant was her trust for him.
He was so drawn to her that he wanted to go, but looking in fright at the the older man, he dared not move. The child was obviously disappointed that he didn't come for her that she started to squirm and then fuss. There was a fine silver heart shaped rattle in her hand that she shook in frustration.
The woman rocked her gently, trying to soothe her. The little girl never took her eyes off of the boy and continued to reach out for him.
The woman started to walk away and go out the door and the image started to blur as the boy moved towards her, almost willing her to stay now that the man's attention was gone...
Gillian stood before him in a gauzy, white, sleeveless dress, her long dark hair flowing behind her.
She grinned at him and stretched out her arms- a dazzling smile that stopped his heart! Her dark eyes pierced his soul! So intoxicating was her beauty, that he found it hard to breathe.
"Ryan," she called. " Ryan, come here!"
She was starting to fade as he tried to move forward.
"Gillian, don't go!" Princess, please wait for me! I need you!"
His feet refused to move and when he tried to reach for her, she slipped further away.
"You fool!" an older man's voice snarled. "She doesn't love you- you're a born loser!
You haven't got a chance!"
The man laughed harshly, sending the coldest chill through the air!
"Ryan, Baby!" Gillian's voice sounded far away...
"Gillian, please don't go!" he pleaded.
The man's voice laughed louder and it was joined by a women.
"But you're my wife- I love you! Stay with me, please!"
"Your marriage is a joke- just like you!" The couple taunted him.
"No!" he protested. "Gillian loves me! She always will!"
"Who'd love you?!"
A child's cry now joined Gillian's and the two blended together and rang painfully in his ears!...
Ryan awoke with a violent start and his head tossed from side to side!
"Gillian, don't go! Please" he stammered, trying to get air for his lungs.
Gillian, who had been asleep in his arms, had heard his screams and had woken up and was now trying to soothe him.
"Ryan, Baby, it's alright- it's Gillian! Wake up- it's alright!"
She rubbed Ryan's powerful forearm until he had calmed down, but he was still breathing hard.
When he saw that it was her, he pulled her towards him.
"Gilli, you're here! You're still here with me- you didn't go!"
"Yes! Yes, Baby," she said softly. "Sh! Shh!...I'm here- right here with you- I'm not going anywhere!"
"You promise?" he asked, holding her in his arms.
"I promise- you had a bad dream, that's all!"
She spoke gently, her words like a soft blanket falling slowly over him.
"I'm so afraid to lose you, Gillian!" Ryan admitted desperately, clinging to her.
Gillian held him in her arms and comforted him. She kissed his forehead adn promised never to leave him. She stroked his hair with light fingers as he lay with her now as the night wore on.
Though she felt that he was fine now, his nightmare disturbed her. Ryan was usually the one to comfort her from bad dreams. She couldn't remember him having them. Still, even when they had been apart, at first, Ryan had always turned to Gillian to patch him up when he had been hurt or sick. She was used to this role.
She was also happy that Ryan always wanted her to take care of him. This was the time Ryan's defenses, which he had spent a lifetime putting up, were completely down and he put his trust into her hands. This had really been the only time he had allowed himself to be vulnerable until they had started making love again.
She had missed this when they had split for what seemed like for good and she wouldn't allow herself to wonder if it were Hayley who had taken her place during that time.
She watched him now, lying in her embrace, secure enough to sleep again.
His lashes formed dark half moons against his skin and his chest rose and fell steadily again instead of erractic like awhile ago. He had completely relaxed in her hands now, something that he wouldn't allow himself to even do in the past with anyone else, she knew, when he was growing up.
Gillian did not sleep the rest of that night. Instead, she watched Ryan sleep, her face showing the joy she felt in looking after him. She remembered telling Becca once that there had been no peace when they had been together and no rest when they were apart. She should have added tht she and Ryan had actually found the peace they were looking for in the lack of peace that so peppered their relationship. They had somehow been happy being at odds- it was the fire in their union. But ever so often, moments like these found their way to them. Moments of complete...smypatico when everything was right and settled.
Gillian remembered Raquel had taught her that word and felt that it somehow fit her and Ryan totally. Ryan briefly stirred and his hand rested against her stomach as he curled himself up closer to her.
"I love you, mein Leibling," she whispered to him. "Very, very much and I'll take care away all your bad dreams one by one so you'll only have good ones forever..."...
end of part 40
(to be continued...)
Next time" Gillian and Ryan make a new and (for Ryan) unexpected new friend...