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(LONG LIVE THE LEGION)
A Highly Selective (and Shamelessly
Biased) Retrospective of the All-Time Coolest Moments in the History of
the Silver Age LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES.
(PART FIVE)
One more supremely silly moment, I swear... and then we'll get right back to
the "serious" stuff. 
COOL MOMENT THE EIGHTEENTH: "... Actually, Lana... What Really Turns Me On Is Small Dogs. In Cute Li'l Red Capes." (a.k.a., "Timber Wolf: Dead Hero... Live Executioner!"; SUPERBOY #197) casts much-needed illumination on the (quasi-)sexual stirrings between the teenaged Superboy and his comely, auburn-tressed next-door neighbor, Lana Lang.
Two "key" elements at play here, I think:
ONE: check out the major, major case of "flop sweat" going on with our Bow-Tied Boy of Steel, in the second panel of this page. (Cripes, fellah... all she's asking for is a freakin' kiss! I mean... it's not like she leaned over and murmured in a low, seductive rowl: "The pants, stud-god. Now.")
(I'd counsel the poor super-schlub
to "get a grip," I suppose... if it weren't for the fact that I suspect he'd
take said advice a wee bit too, ummm, literally, given the evidence.
IIIIIIIIII'm just sayin', is all.)
... and, TWO: the woman
gets ka-BONKed on the cranium... and starts moaning: "... oh, Clark...
OOOOooooh..."? Migawd! I know they do things a mite, ah,
different, in those small, isolated Appalachian communities (I've been
"around," after all; I've seen DELIVERANCE)... but: come on, now!
What... they've got graffiti in the boy's rest room at Smallville High,
saying: "For a 'good time,' go see Lana Lang. And bring a hammer"...?
The scene above, however, is notable in yet another (and far less Freudian) particular: it was drawn by the single greatest, hands-down, no arguments LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES artist of all time: the magnificent Dave Cockrum.
The wondrous Mr. Cockrum's tenure on the LEGION series was a brief one -- little more than a scant handful of stories, all told --
... but: it was as pivotal and (re-)defining an artistic tour of duty, overall, as those enjoyed by any DC Comics series of the Silver Age, excluding Neal Adams' stints on Batman, Green Lantern and Green Arrow.
Case closed.
In the minuscule space of but a single year, he completely redesigned the costumes of all thirty-something Legionnaires , rendering them suitably more "futuristic"-seeming than they'd ever been, throughout their checkered comics history... as well as (visually) re-positing the 30th Century in terms considerably more sleek and high-gloss than any of his predecessors (a "vision" of the future, incidentally, to which every artist plying his respective "trade" on this series has been manifestly beholden, ever since).
One of his most outstanding visual templates, in fact, figures prominently in the explication of COOL MOMENT THE NINETEENTH: "... Geez... I Guess Clothes Really Do Make the Man...!" (a.k.a., "The One-Shot Hero"; SUPERBOY #195).
A Legion applicant by the (unwieldy, admittedly) handle of ERG-1 (abbreviation for "Energy-Release Generator" One) attempts to "wow" his way into the team's august assemblage by demonstrating how his (accidentally) having been transformed into "sentient anti-matter energy" enables him to duplicate the energy-based powers of virtually any Legionnaire, at will. Phantom Girl's intangibility; Chemical King's total mastery over trans-chemical reactions; etc., etc. Bottom line: he puts on one heck of a good show, "floor model"-wise.
Unfortunately, the Legionnaire's have this little "rule" in their team's charter, explicitly stating that "each member must possess a unique super-power all his (or her) own." (A rule -- I'm just pointing out, here -- which was, quite often, honored more in the breach than in actual, everyday practice. SEE: Superboy; Supergirl; Mon-El; etc.) Unless ERG-1 has some special, non-duplicable power or ability... No Dice.
The Anti-Matter Adolescent avers that he does, indeed, possess just such a singular super-power... but: "Don't ask me to explain, but... I can't show it to you!" The Legionnaires greet this assertion with (understandable, I suppose) incredulity, and ERG-1 is politely -- but firmly -- rejected for Legion membership.
It isn't until later on in the very same story -- while an unconscious Colossal Boy is about to become pulverized by an unstoppable, out-of-control mechanical juggernaut -- that the courageous ERG-1 reappears, desperate to prove himself, once and for all, in the eyes of his spandexed idols. Without a second's hesitation, he flips open his helmet's visor; and --
... well... see for yourself.
Chemical King: "No wonder he didn't dare demonstrate for us, before -- !"
Colossal Boy: "He had a power he could use only once! NEVER AGAIN!"
The genuine sentiments of the lachrymose Legionnaires notwithstanding... ERG-1 did manage, ultimately, to "re-coalesce" his energies once more, and -- taking on the infinitely "snazzier" code-name of Wildfire -- became one of the most enduringly poopular of the Legionnaires with the Silver Age readership of the day.
"Cool Moment" #1 opened up this LSH retrospective with a death (Lightning Lad's); thus, it's only fitting that COOL MOMENT THE (TOP) TWENTIETH bring matters to a close in much the same fashion. Ladies and gents... I give you: "I'm Sorry, Darling... But: I Just Can't 'See' You Any More! Get It? Huh? You Get It -- ?!? BWAH-Ha-Ha-Haaaaa!!" (a.k.a., "Massacre By Remote Control"; SUPERBOY #203).
Long-time LEGION stalwart (and perennial wallflower, characterization-wise) Invisible Kid is discovered, inadvertently, to be sideways-slipping into another dimensional realm, altogether, whenever utilizing his power to render himself completely transparent. In the course of one such trans-reality "jaunt," he met -- and fell desperately in love with -- the diaphanous Myla, who only manifested herself (and, even then, only to the lovesick Kid) on that particular plane of existence.
Tragically (a word that gets used more often in the average recounting of Legionnaire Lore than does even the phrase "super-powers"), Invisible Kid (real name: "Lyle Norg") gets himself agonizingly crunched by the rampaging ubermonster known as Validus, shortly after this revelation is made common coin in the Legion "break room." A manifestly tough "bounce" for the two star- (and dimension-) crossed lovers, obviously...
... ah! But wait! It turns out that Myla isn't the non-corporeal resident of some other dimension, after all; she's actually a ghost! The deceased Lyle hadn't been traipsing through an alternate dimension, all of this time; he'd been be-bopping about on the outskirts of the afterlife!
It's a damned hard way to get "lucky," I grant you...
... but: I daresay ol' Lyle beat Superboy to that particular "promised land," in any event.
I'm. Just. Sayin'.
Legion of Super-Heroes (History): PAGE ONE
Legion of Super-Heroes (History): PAGE TWO
Legion of Super-Heroes (History): PAGE THREE
Legion of Super-Heroes (History): PAGE FOUR
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