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I've spent my life in pursuit of the things I was told and taught from an early age... An understanding and willingness to find the beauty in the common everyday things and the extraordinary. That a person can achieve and transcend an aspect of perfection... an illusion, yes, to various degrees, but the pursuit and ascendance to a higher plain, an appreciation, perception and understanding of the larger things in life are goals in and of themselves. It was a given that the lower more primal aspects would show themselves.. The goal was to strive for and find the balance between the two.
I grasped these ideals and concepts from an early age. I embraced them and took them to heart as the goal and ultimate achievement of Man. Knowing that perfection could never be achieved, but learning that the seeking, the pursuit, the UNDERSTANDING and attempt to reflect, live and be as close as you could to that vision of higher understanding... the vision of the poets and philosophers that have come and gone.. As I grew into and embraced what I was later to find out were not what those around me sought, I found myself not wanting to give up the vision of it. From an early age I found myself talking to those who were approaching life's end or at least the freedom to pursue the "finer aspects of life" as they closed in on retirement asking me the "Big questions". I found myself talking to and giving advice to them. Needless to say it's a little weird to be 5 years old and giving "the answers of Life" to someone so much older than yourself and having them look at you like some kind of prophet. For me it was simple. I've grown through all my life with it. Don Quixote.. he had his Dulcinea. Dreamer and visionary, a willingness to seek out and find the beauty within in an age where the death of romance and the ideals of chivalry were dying... an astounding leap beyond the day that was dominated by the harsh realities of the Spanish Inquisition... Cyrano de Bergiac.. a mind that was honed to a keen edge, talent, finesse, poise a fighting man in the prime of his life seeking and searching.. for.. Meeting one that transcended and rose to multiple levels, with beauty, intelligence and personality that didn't know how to define what she sought.. so she sought it within the everyday typecast levels that she perceived. It took giving a good man who idealized her without understanding her his own words to ignite the spark that leapt to the heavens with another’s face... Time and circumstance have bound me to my life. I've striven my whole life to transcend and achieve.. so many things, most of which I have. There are gaps.. I've a realist's understanding of these things with a refined poet's aspirations, dreams and hope... Hope that one day I might find someone who sees that Life can be more than posing as others require you to pose to appear a certain way or because it's the popular perception of what is meant to be striven for.
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