Sailing the Oceans of Cheese. An evening with Primus
Concert Review - Roseland, NY Nov25th, 2003
Due to natural divinity I obtained 2 complimentary passes from Interscope to see the sold out show Primus for which I was very thankful for.
I was surprised that people knew who primus was, let alone that the show was sold out. I guess I've been living in the box too long.
Scalpers were selling tickets as much as 100 bucks a pop. Quite a lot indeed!
Before the show , my friend and I walked around looking at restaurant menus to see what we would eat. We passed a Thai restaurant, where a bunch of bum-looking people were eating in it. A man with a huge head was looking at us. After settling the wine business, we went back to the restaurant to eat. Then I realized that those bums dining were actually Primus! I recognized Les' nose.
It was long and pointy.
Plus I saw him in an interview on TV and he was wearing the same girly multi colored shirt. The huge head turned out to be the drummer.
I ended up giving them a video tape with my latest sketches. I figured they could watch it on the tour bus or something. Unfortunately, that was the last day of the tour and they said they were going home by plane.
They looked a little surprised when I approached them. I mean how many girls in lace shirts have approached them with video tapes? But I told them its not porn. It sounded like a corny joke but they all laughed cheesily.
In my video package, I enclosed a letter saying "when I'm famous, you can be guests and play on my show". When I went to resume my dinner, I noticed that they were still passing around my letter, and synopsis of skits around the table. Fancy that!
However, when I asked if I could video tape them saying "you are watching Ms. Divine's le Tee Hee Heure", their manager politely declined. He said Primus don't do promos. The wish of the Divine One was declined! Surely my ears must have deceived me. What's the big deal any way to have me video tape them? They were being interviewed on FUSE (an MTV type channel) the other day. Shouldn't they feel a bit ashamed to be subjected to those silly DJ's questions. I guess they figured they can get more sales/promotion through MTV. After all who is lil ole me, they must have wondered. But what they don't realize is that, in the long run I can promote more than MTV ever can! For it is not THEY who are helping ME, it is I that is helping them by featuring THEM on video. I can create their music videos to be very entertaining filled with amusing characters played by me. I'm sure in time they will realize this. Next time I will video tape them without their knowledge.
Hairy Happy People
The concert was fun. I took photos up front. However the bouncers told me that PRimus didn't want flash from the camera, so no flash allowed. I don't believe that, I think its some dum policy Rosland has, because I was told the same thing for ministry. Anyway I Chatted with some funny European guys who came all the way to see Primus. I wasn't sure what they were saying, but they were grinning and they looked hairy and happy. So here is their picture. In this concert, I thought the audience members seemed to come in a large variety, so that was cool.
While primus was playing, there were these circular projectors(see picture below) on stage, with videos playing in he background. I noticed that for a long time Bush's face kept flashing. I figured that Les was probably not fond of Bush. I don't blame him. However Bush is just a puppet or the fall guy. It doesn't really help to insult a puppet. Sometimes people(I don't mean Primus) just insult Bush to be 'trendy'. I bet the guy doesn't even want to be president. Perhaps the video would have been more interesting if they dared show who was pulling the puppet's strings....
Here is there setlist.
The rest of the night was spent on the balcony dancing and shaking with my friend.
Unfortunately that is all I remember.
It turned out that some ugly guys, decided to poison one of our drinks with a ruffie(Rohypnol).
Perhaps the felt intimidated to see 2 beautiful girl having a good time and being themselves.
Perhaps they felt anger that they can never have such beauties like us. Please refer to my thesis on plight of the beautiful girl. But whatever their reasons were, it was malice mixed with stupidity.
I ended up blacking out awakening in a pool of vomit only to have NO memory of what happened after I was poisoned. My head was spinning from confusion and couldn't even process thoughts properly when my friend was trying to inform me of what happened the next day.
I think the roaches weren't sure which beautiful girl was the poisoned one, and thus nothing terribly severe happened except that they boldly and shamelessly stole some money.
Beware of drink poisoning by nuts
Ruffies are stronger than valium. It makes you in a very relaxed, drugged, unaware state, and then wipes out your memory. I looked functional but was like a zombie. Even if somebody was slicing my kidney out, I'd still have a grin on my face as if everything was just fine and dandy. That's how powerful this ruffy is. So beware.
Some doses can leave you with seizures, comas, etc. I was lucky that my friend brought me home safely.
Beware of ugly stinkies all around
My friend pieced my blank memory for me. The dum Roseland bouncers as well as the other Roseland employees were very unpleasant and reluctant in finding our suspiciously missing jackets. There were a few nice bouncers though who gave her money for transportation.
We still don't know who did it.
One of the nicer bouncers commented to my friend that they saw us dancing form the balcony. But I wondered why somebody from the ground floor was staring at the balcony. Perhaps other guys or girls were probably noticing us. Did anybody even see Primus that night or were all eyes on us??? I smell a conspiracy.
But girls or guys, if you go out, don't trust even the people that work at these clubs including the bartenders, and bouncers. I don't think they could give two hoots what happens to you.
Ruffies can be used for rape as well as robbery. Yuck! It's so easy to incapacitate somebody with a ruffie. Here is a link that is very informative. Reading the night marish stories of other ruffy victims gave me chills. The nightmarish possiblities are endless.
It took me a while to recover and I was still feeling very fatigued even after a few days, even feeling a bit violated, probably because I didn't have any memory. But hey, I'm back on my feet writing this review.
