Mid-May, 2001. . .Somewhere in South America

Nick and Howie were at their hotel, lounging near the pool at the outdoor bar. They had been in South America for nearly three weeks. Three weeks since Nick had last seen Danielle. He had gotten used to seeing her when he was home over their break. He thought for sure she would have come out to see him this past weekend, but here it was Monday, and she didn't come. He was feeling lonely and he was missing her terribly. He was quite frankly, feeling sorry for himself.

Howie bought them another round of drinks, this time each drink was accompanied by a shot of tequila.

"Missing your girl, aren't you?" Howie asked as he slid the shot of tequila towards Nick. "I know something is eating at you, cause you sure are quiet and you sure are crabby."

"I must be missing her more than she's missing me," Nick replied grabbing the shot glass and throwing it back down his throat, grimacing as the alcohol slid past his tongue. He took a suck of lemon and continued his thought. "I wanted her to come out here this weekend, but she said she had to study or write a paper or something."

"Well, that's valid isn't it?" Howie asked.

"Valid? Howie, she could have done some writing on the plane or at the hotel. She could have done all that out here," Nick complained.

"What are you saying?" Howie asked.

"I'm saying give me another shot of tequila," he replied as he took a drink of his beer. "Tonight, I don't want to think about her. It's only gonna piss me off even more."

Howie ordered up another couple of shots. He knew that Nick would be on the floor if he had another, but if it was going to cheer him up, then why not. Nick was the one who would have to deal with the hangover, not him.

There were a couple girls sitting across the bar from Nick and Howie. After the boys finished their second shot another round showed up in front of them.

"Compliments of those lovely ladies over there," the bartender told them in a thick accent.

"Well how about that?" Nick said loudly. "At least I can get attention from any other girl."

Nick motioned for the girls to come and join them as Howie gave him a warning look. "Nick?" he said under his breath.

"Shhhhh, I know what I'm doing Howie," Nick replied quickly.

The girls made their way over to the boys and found a spot near their respective prey. Both girls were from Venezuela. Both had long dark hair and chocolate eyes. They looked like they were sisters. The taller one took a seat next to Nick, in between him and Howie.

"Thank you for the drinks, ladies," Howie said. "But I think that it is us who should be treating you."

The girls giggled and nodded in agreement. Howie and Nick proceeded to buy three or four more rounds of shots. Each round getting raunchier and everyone was getting touchier. By the fourth round of shots, Nick was holding the lemon between his teeth for the taller girl to suck. Howie watched and followed suit, then started laughing.

"Nicky, you're a bad boy!" he taunted. "You're in trouble."

"I ain't doing anything, yet," Nick laughed back and wrapped his arm around the girl's waist, pulling her closer to him. It felt good to just be able to feel a female body next to him. He did miss Danielle, but she wasn't there. And he was lonely.

"You see," Nick slurred to the girl. "I haf a girlfriend. Buh, sheeeeeee didn't want to come and see me this weekend, so I'm all alone."

"Well, I'll be your girlfriend tonight," she told him and wrapped her arm around his neck.

"Hey! None of that young Carter!" Howie swatted at Nick.

Nick swatted back at him, "Hey, everyone else is getting some, I might as well. Dani ain't putting out. A guy's got needs you know."

"I can fulfill those needs," the girl told Nick seductively.

Nick looked at the girl and saw the lust in her eyes. He could feel himself getting worked up and he knew that this would be an easy release for him. She was itching to sleep with him, and he was itching to have sex.

Nick put his mouth near the girl's ear, got up off his stool and told her, "C'mon, let's go."

As Nick stood up, Howie grabbed his arm, "You're gonna get in trouble Nicky."

"She ain't here is she?" Nick yelled.

Howie shook his head no, "But. . ."

"Fuck that Howie! I don't need to wait around for her," Nick yelled again and roughly pulled the girl along with him, leaving Howie at the bar with her friend.

That same night, in Tampa

Danielle had just finished brewing a pot of coffee. She was in the middle of studying for finals as well as trying to finish up her senior paper. She felt like she hadn't slept in days and it was showing. She was snapping at anyone and everyone who crossed her path and her stress level was extremely high. She had spent the entire weekend polishing her senior paper and hardly anytime studying for her first final exam which she had the next day.

Then she had Nick hounding her. He knew before he left for South America that she probably wouldn't be coming out to visit him and yet he was upset with her all weekend for not coming down there. She missed him so much, and there were times when she wanted to throw all this homework to the side and just leave so she could be with him. It broke her heart to hear the disappointment in his voice this last time. But there was no way she could leave the country for the weekend. She barely finished her senior paper, and she still wasn't entirely happy with it.

She took a drink of her coffee. "I bet I drink that whole pot tonight," she told herself. "I swear if I cut myself nothing but coffee would come running out." She looked at the clock and saw that it was 10:30pm. She hadn't talked to Nick since this morning and she was surprised that he hadn't called her yet this evening. He was so tired when she spoke to him this morning she let him go so he could get some sleep.

She grabbed the phone and looked at it, pondering whether or not she should call. "I'll probably feel much better if I just talk to him," she said talking to herself again. She hit the talk button on her phone and dialed his cell phone number.

Nick and the girl he met at the bar were just arriving to his hotel room when his cell phone started ringing. He patted around in his pockets till he felt the phone in his pants. He pulled it out of his pocket and checked the caller id.

"Shit!" he said out loud. He opened the door to his hotel and told the girl to wait outside in the hall for a moment. He wasn't going to chance Danielle hearing another girl in the background. He answered the phone as he stepped into the room.

"Hello?" he said.

"Hey you," she said.

"Hey. What's up?" he asked abruptly.

"Nothing, I just hadn't heard from you and I wanted to talk to you," she answered surprised by how short he was being with her.

"Oh you did huh? Well, I've been busy. Much like you've been busy," he snapped.

Danielle let out a huge sigh, "Nick? Please, I'm not in the mood for this right now."

"Let's add that to another thing you're never in the mood for," Nick added angrily.

"What is your fucking problem tonight?" she yelled. "Really? Nick, you're acting like an ass!"

"Let me ask you a question," he began. "Where are you right now?"

"At home," she answered.

"And where am I?"

"South America."

"Doing good so far. When was the last time we saw each other?" he continued.

"About three weeks ago," she sighed again.

"Now, here's the bonus question. Do you even fucking miss me?" he asked.

"Nick! God, what kind of question is that? Of COURSE I miss you! I'm missing you more than you can imagine! You know that!" she yelled.

"No, Danielle, I don't. I don't see you here with me. I'm not holding you in my arms right now. Not like that would do me any good since I end up having sex with my hand anyway!" he yelled back.

"That was not necessary! You said you didn't want to push me! You were willing to wait till I was ready! What is wrong with you? And, why don't you come back here and visit me?" she challenged.

"Cause I have WORK to do. I'm NEEDED here," he answered. "And what is wrong? What's wrong is I haven't been able to finish another bottle of tequila yet cause you've called and interrupted me."

"Ohhhhhh, so that's it. You're drunk. You're drunk and feeling sorry for yourself and so you are trying to punish me," she said. "Well, listen here, Carter. MY work is just as important as YOUR work. And I take great offense that you think so little about what I've worked so hard for over the last five years!"

"You know what, Dani? Right now, I don't care! I care about the fact that YOU are not here with ME," he yelled back. "I haven't seen you in three weeks! You didn't come out to Mexico either! It's always on YOUR terms."

"Nick, I made a promise to myself that I was going to get through this year. I am ALMOST done, PLEASE stop acting like this. I didn't leave school for Joey, and I'm not going to do it for you either," she trying to suppress her anger.

"JOEY! Let's talk about Joey," he began. "Tell me, Dani. Is that why you don't want to come out and see me? Am I going to open the paper tomorrow morning and see a picture of the two of you cuddling? Am I going to read about how you've reunited with your true love?"

This was more than Danielle wanted to hear. She couldn't believe the things that were coming out of his mouth. The fact that he was drunk couldn't excuse the way he was making her feel. The tears began to flow from her eyes.

"I didn't need this tonight, Nick," she began, her voice shaking. "I called you because I missed you. And I needed to hear your voice to start feeling better. I'm so fucking stressed out right now and you are acting like a fucking spoiled brat."

"Spoiled? Me?" Nick asked, surprised.

"Yes! You! Spoiled brat! Whatever Nicky wants, Nicky gets! And if he doesn't get it, then blame everyone else!" she cried. "Well, fuck that, Nick! Fuck that and fuck you! This whole thing was a mistake! I was wrong! I was so wrong to get involved with you. So go ahead and find some whore down there so you don't have to 'have sex with your hand' tonight! I'm done!"

Danielle sat there while the tears poured out of her eyes. She sat there and waited for Nick's response, but he was quiet for a long time.

Nick stood there holding the phone to his ear listening to her cry. Part of him was begging for him to apologize to her, for hurting her. The drunken other part was glad she was upset. He was hurt, so she should be hurt too. Besides she just gave him the go ahead to get some action. But did she also just say she was breaking up with him? His mind was clouded with a dozen thoughts and he was having trouble sorting them out. He didn't know what to say to her, but before he knew it his mouth was speaking before he was thinking.

"Whatever you want, Danielle," he said softly and hung up the phone.

Danielle heard the phone go dead. "Nick? Nick!" she cried into the phone. "Oh no, now what have I done? I didn't mean it! I didn't mean it!" She clutched the phone tight to her and squeezed her eyes shut tight, the tears refusing to stop. She tried calling him back but he had turned the phone off. "Damnit!" she screamed and threw the phone across the room. She laid her head down on the table in front of her and sobbed. "Nick! Nick!" she said over and over. "I love you! I love you! I didn't mean it!"

Nick went back to the door and opened it to let the other girl in.

"I heard you yelling," she said walking up to him and tracing her finger down his chest, unbuttoning his shirt. "Everything ok?"

Nick grabbed her hand and pushed her down to her knees. "That's none of your business," he said. He stood before her and began to undo his pants while she rubbed his thighs.

"I certainly hope you are planning on returning the favor to me," she said to him as he released himself from his boxers.

"You fucking talk too much," Nick said. She grabbed onto him and began to rub him causing Nick to moan. She continued to rub him with her hand and stared up at him.

"Is that all you're gonna do? You know what I want," he told her, the bitterness cutting through his voice. Suddenly, Nick started feeling sick. His stomach began to churn and he felt like he needed to sit down. He pulled away from her and stood there with one hand over his stomach and the other over his mouth.

"Oh shit," he muttered as he felt the contents of his stomach coming up his throat. He ran to the bathroom, tripping over his pants that were now around his ankles. He kept holding onto his mouth to keep everything in and barely made it to the toilet in time to project all the alcohol that was in his stomach.

When he was done vomiting, he sat back next to the toilet and leaned his forehead against the bowl. "Oh, God," he breathed. His whole body was sweating and he felt completely weak. He lay back against the bathroom wall and closed his eyes.

The girl was still on her knees in the same spot that Nick had left her when there was a knock on the door. She could hear Nick wretching and went to go and see who was knocking. She peaked through the hole and saw Howie and her friend on the other side. She opened the door with a worried look on her face.

"Hey, is he here?" Howie asked.

She nodded and let him come in. "He's sick," she said.

"Sick? What's wrong with him?" he asked. He looked at her questionably and decided it was time for the girls to go home. They didn't need to be around if Nick really was sick. "I think it's time to call it a night, ladies. Thank you for a nice evening."

Howie kissed each of them on the cheek and escorted them to the door. He then went into the bathroom where he found Nick lying on the floor, half naked with his pants around his ankles and sweating. Parts of Nick's vomit were visible on the sides of the toilet. He must have missed a little bit, Howie thought.

Howie went over to pick Nick up off the floor. All of Nick as dead weight was hard for Howie to handle by himself. Nick was passed out cold. He needed to wake him up to get him out of the bathroom and into bed. He found a glass and filled it with cold water. He threw the glass of water on Nick's face, he didn't even flinch. In fact, Nick then began to snore.

"Oh come on!" Howie cried. "No more tequila for you little man!" He reached down and grabbed onto Nick's arms and began to drag him across the floor into the bedroom. "I hope this was worth it, Nick. Sick as a dog, and from the looks of it, Danielle's gonna kill you if she finds out."

Howie got Nick to the bed and was trying to lift him onto it. Nick began to come to a bit and started babbling. "Where am I?" he asked.

"Your hotel room," Howie answered. "In Venezuela. Nick? Nick? Are you in there?"

"Howie?" Nick asked squinting his eyes to see his friend. "What are you doing here, D?"

"Saving your butt!" Howie replied. "Nick? Can you tell me what happened?"

"Danielle," Nick muttered. "She's mad. Said it was over."

"You talked to her? Nick?" Howie said, slapping Nick's face trying to keep him awake. "Nick? When did you talk to her?"

"Oh shit, D, she's pissed. Then I. . .I. . .I'm so fucking stupid!" Nick remembered.

Nick began to drift back off to sleep. "Nick?" Howie yelled. "Stay awake, man and tell me what happened!" But, Nick was snoring again. Howie went into the bathroom and grabbed the glass and filled it with water again. He went back to where Nick was lying and threw the water on him again. This time, it worked.

"Jesus! What the fuck!" Nick bolted up. He looked around and saw Howie standing there "Are you trying to fucking drown me, Howie?"

"I need you to tell me what happened, cause you aren't going to remember any of this tomorrow," Howie explained. "Did you sleep with that girl?"

"What? What girl?" Nick thought for a minute. "Ohhh, that girl. Fuck no! She didn't even know what she was doing. Didn't get anything."

Nick rubbed his hands over his face, "I feel like shit man."

"I bet," Howie added. "What's going on with Dani?"

"Dani? Shit! I hung up on her, she said it was over," he said trying to remember. "There was screaming and yelling. I don't know. I think I fucked up."

"To say the least," Howie told him. "Get some sleep now, bro. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Before Howie was even out the door, Nick was snoring again.

Nick woke up the next morning to the shrill ringing of the hotel phone. He hated that phone. He hated how the sound of it was cutting through his skull like a knife.

He grabbed the phone, "Hello!"

"Hey bro! Whassup?" It was Aaron.

"What in the hell are you doing calling me so fucking early?" Nick asked him.

"It's noon, Nick. What's up your butt?" his brother teased.

"Noon? Shit. I'm dying, dude," Nick sighed.

"Are you hung over?" Aaron started laughing hysterically. "Get your butt up, lazyass."

Slowly the events of the prior evening started coming back to Nick. He had brief glimpses of various parts of the night. The only one that kept coming back to him was him hanging up on Danielle.

"I think I fucked up, bro," Nick said.

"What? What'd you do now?" Aaron asked.

"I was all pissed off because Danielle didn't come out here this weekend and I went off on her last night. I was so fucked up, Aaron," Nick told his brother.

"Well, she should have come out there. It's not like you can just go and visit her whenever she wants. She should know she has to accommodate you," Aaron said fueling Nick's reason for being mad in the first place.

"Yeah, I know. I know," Nick said rubbing his eyes.

He could hear his mother on the other end telling Aaron to give her the phone.

"Nick?" Jane was on the phone now.

"Yeah, Mom, hey."

"What happened with Danielle?" she asked.

"I got pissed at her for not coming out here, we got into a huge argument. I don't know, I think it's done," he said pouring water into a glass.

"What was her reason for not coming to see you?" Jane pressed.

"She has finals and a paper or something. It's always school with her," he added, looking through his bag for aspirin.

"Nick, don't you think that maybe that is something that is a little more important right now than frolicking around with all the other girls while she waits for the few hours she gets with you?"

Nick stopped what he was doing to listen to what his mother was saying. Was she taking her side?

"Are you taking her side?" Nick asked.

"I'm not taking any sides, but I think that you need to take a look at the whole picture here. I think that you may be being a little selfish. You're used to having girls drop everything to come and see you on the road. For Christ sake, Mandy dropped out of high school for you! I think that you need to be a little more giving. She has things that were important in her life before you came along you know. Just think about what I'm saying, okay?"

Nick listened closely to what she said. They talked a bit about when he was coming home and that he would be in Key West at the beginning of June and that he would be home to visit for sure around then.

When he got off the phone with his mom, he knew he had to talk to Danielle. He felt horrible and after listening to what his mom told him, he realized that maybe he was being a little more selfish than he thought.

He ordered some breakfast and took a shower. After his food arrived and he ate, he was feeling much better. He checked the time and knew that Danielle would be at home. He knew that now was as good a time as any.

Danielle was sitting on her couch curled up in a blanket. She had been up all night crying. She felt sick to her stomach and she missed her first final that morning. She couldn't concentrate on studying. All she could think about the whole night was how much she needed to talk to Nick and how unattainable he was at that moment. She had no idea what was happening now. The way he hung up and the way she yelled at him. It scared her to think that she chased him away.

She jumped when she heard the phone ring, but she answered it right away.

"Hello?" she said quickly.

"Danielle."

"Nick?"

"Yeah, it's me."

She started crying as soon as she heard his confirmation that it was him.

"Dani, stop crying. Please. Just stop," he told her. She couldn't tell from the tone of his voice whether this was going to be a good call or an even worse one.

"Nick? I've been up all night, worried about you! I couldn't study and I missed my final! I haven't slept in days and I, I, I'm just. . .I'm sorry I got so mad at you last night," she sobbed. She was babbling. Words were flying out of her mouth and Nick could barely comprehend what she was saying.

"Baby, slow down! I can't understand you. Now hold up and listen to me okay?" he stopped her.

She sniffled, "Okay."

"I know I said some really rotten things to you last night. Even though this isn't an excuse, I was really really drunk. Howie and I were doing tequila shots like all night. Believe me, I paid for it. But, baby, I didn't mean all the things I said. I didn't, I swear to God, I didn't," Nick explained.

"It didn't sound like anything you would have said, Nick. I've been so stressed out and when you started saying those things it just triggered something in me. All of my pent up frustrations just started bursting out," she explained back to him choking back more tears.

"I swear baby, I didn't mean any of it. Except for the parts about how much I miss you," he began. "That's my whole problem. I just miss you so much, and I'm not used to not having my girl with me. To me, you should be here. And maybe that's selfish, but that's how I feel. I need to work on that. But you said some hurtful things too, you know."

They was a brief silence between them before he continued, "Do you really think that we're a mistake? That our relationship is wrong? Do you really want to end this?"

She could hear his voice crack on his last couple of words. She shook her head even though he couldn't see her, "No, baby. I don't. I didn't mean that either. I was just so upset over what you were saying. I still can't believe I heard those words come out of your mouth towards me."

"I was just lashing out. And I'm soooo sorry. I swear, I didn't mean it," he told her again.

"I'm sorry for calling us a mistake. Cause I totally don't think that. I love being with you, Nick. When you hung up the phone last night, I felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest. I thought I had lost you," she said quietly.

"You haven't lost me, babygirl. I'm here, as long as you'll have me," he reassured her.

"I wish I could hug you right now," she whispered.

"I know. I know. Only two more weeks, then I'll be home," he said.

"I can't wait," she smiled.

"Now, go to school. See if you can make up that final exam or something. I don't want you flunking out after all this," he laughed.

"Thanks Nick. I lo. . ."she stopped herself from continuing.

"What'd you say?" Nick asked quickly.

"Nothing, baby. I'll talk to you later okay?"

"Yup, I'm gonna go back to sleep. Bye Dani," Nick said.

"Bye."

Chapter 15
Chapter 13
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