A flat, circular planet that rests on the backs of four elephants, which in turn are standing on the back of a giant turtle. Don't ask what the turtle stands on, you might as well as what sound yellow makes.
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DISCWORLD by TERRY PRATCHETT
A flat, circular planet that rests on the backs of four elephants, which in turn are standing on the back of a giant turtle. Don't ask what the turtle stands on, you might as well as what sound yellow makes. |
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Colour of Magic, the (1983)
The Colour of Magic is Terry Pratchett's maiden voyage through the bizarre land of Discworld. His entertaining and witty series has grown to more than 20 books, and this is where it all starts--with the tourist Twoflower and his hapless wizard guide, Rincewind. "All wizards get like that ... it's the quicksilver fumes. Rots their brains. Mushrooms, too." |
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Light Fantastic, the (1986)
Rincewind was the most truly inept wizard the flat earth of Discworld had ever known. He was a wizard with only one spell, a spell he would never dare to say, one of the Eight Great Spells from the magical Octavo. So powerful was this magic that every ordinary useful spell refused to stay in the wizard's mind for even one instant. Then the Red Star appeared in the sky--and everyone finally understood what the Eight Spells were really for...to ward off the menace of this starry devastation. But the Octavo only has seven spells left. And suddenly the whole planet--from wizards and warriors to druids and demons--were after Rincewind. Yet even if they found him in time, would this inept magician be able to get the only Spell of his life right? Would this be the end of the only honest-to-gosh flat earth--or some crazy new beginning...? |
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Equal Rites (1987)
The last thing the wizard Drum Billet did before Death laid a bony hand on his shoulder, was to pass on his staff of power to the eighth son of an eighth son. Unfortunately for his colleagues in the chauvinistic (not to say misogynistic) world of magic, he failed to check on the new-born baby's sex... |
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Mort (1987)
Death comes to us all. When he came to Mort, he offered him a job. After being assured that being dead was not compulsory, Mort accepted. However, he soon found that romantic longings did not mix easily with the responsibilities of being Death's apprentice. |
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Sourcery (1988)
There was an eighth son of an eighth son. He was, quite naturally, a wizard. And there it should have ended. However (for reasons we'd better not go into), he had seven sons. And then he had an eighth son...a wizard squared...a source of magic...a Sourcerer. |
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Wyrd Sisters (1988)
Meet Granny Weatherwx, the most highly regarded non-leader a coven of non-social witches could ever have. Generally, these loners don't get involved in anything, mush less royal intrigue. but then there are those times they can't help it. As Granny Weatherwzx is about to discover, though, it's a lot harder to stir up trouble in the castle than some theatrical types would have you think. Even when you've got a few unexpected spells up your sleeve. |
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Pyramids (1989)
Being trained by the Assassin's Guild in Ankh-Morpork did not fit Pteppic for the task assigned to him by fate. He inherited the throne of the desert kingdom of Djelibeybi rather earlier than he expected (his father wasn't too happy about it either), but that was only the beginning of his problems. |
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Guards! Guards! (1989)
This is where the dragons went. They lie...not dead, not asleep, but...dormant. And although the space they occupy isn't like normal space, nevertheless they are packed in tightly. They could put you in mind of a can of sardines, if you thought sardines were huge and scaly. And, presumably, somewhere, there's a key... |
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Eric (1990)
An inept demonologist wants three wishes granted—to be immortal, to rule the world, and to have a beautiful woman fall in love with him. But instead of a demon, he calls up Rincewind, the most incompetent wizard in the universe. Because Eric gives him no other choice, Rincewind tries to grant him his wishes—with hysterical results. |
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Moving Pictures (1990)
Discworld's pesky alchemists are up to their old tricks again. This time, they've discovered how to get gold from silver—the silver screen, that is. Hearing the siren call of Holy Wood is one Victor Tugelbend, a would-be wizard turned extra. He can't sing, he can't dance, but he can handle a sword (sort of), and now he wants to be a star. So does Theda Withel, an ambitious engènue from a little town (where else?) you've probably never heard of. But the click click of moving pictures isn't just stirring up dreams inside Discworld. Holy Wood's magic is drifting out into the boundaries of the universes, where raw realities, the could-have-beens, the might-bes, the never-weres, the wild ideas are beginning to ferment into a really stinky brew. It's up to Victor and Gaspode the Wonder Dog (a star if ever one was born!) to rein in the chaos and bring order back to a starstruck Discworld. And they're definitely not ready for their close-up! |
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Reaper Man (1991)
When Death begins to question the P's and Q's of his job, he is officially retired, which leads to the kind of chaos that always ensues when a public service is withdrawn. |
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Witches Abroad (1991)
Once upon a time there was a fairy godmother named Desiderata who had a good heart, a wise head, and poor planning skills—which unforunately left the Princess Emberella in the care of her other (not quite so good and wise) godmother when DEATH came for Desiderata. So now it's up to Magrat Garlick, Granny Weatherwax, and Nanny Ogg to hop on broomsticks and make for far-distant Genua to ensure the servant girl doesn't marry the Prince. But the road to Genua is bumpy, and along the way the trio of witches encounters the occasional vampire, werewolf, and falling house (well this is a fairy tale, after all). The trouble really begins once these reluctant foster-godmothers arrive in Genua and must outwit their power-hungry counterpart who'll stop at nothing to achieve a proper "happy ending"—even if it means destroying a kingdom. |
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Small Gods (1992)
Lost in the chill deeps of space between the galaxies, it sails on forever, a flat, circular world carried on the back of a giant turtle— DISCWORLD —a land where the unexpected can be expected. Where the strangest things happen to the nicest people. Like Brutha, a simple lad who only wants to tend his melon patch. Until one day he hears the voice of a god calling his name. A small god, to be sure. But bossy as Hell. |
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Lords and Ladies (1992)
Ever wonder what those magic circles of stones in the English countryside are for? They're to keep the elves out. Elves are nasty (besides being brutish and short). They're vicious. They love cruelty. Plus, to make things worse, elves have got It. Glamour. Style. Humans find elves absolutely irresistible. They actually think elves are cute! So when an infestation of Faerie Trash invades the Kingdom of Lancre, upsetting the Royal Wedding Plans (not to mention the Annual Morris Dance), the ordinary people of Lancre are helpless. It's up to the witches, led by Granny Weatherwax, to deal with the vicious little bastards. Which is all right with Granny. She thinks elves are cute, too. And that makes them even more fun to kill. |
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Men at Arms (1993)
Corporal Carrot has been promoted! He's now in charge of the new recruits guarding Ankh-Morpork, Discworld's greatest city, from Barbarian Tribes, miscellaneous marauders and unlicensed thieves. It's a big job--but an even bigger job awaits when an ancient document reveals that Ankh-Morpork has a secret sovereign. |
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Soul Music (1994)
Other children get given xylophones, Susan just had to ask her grandfather to take his vest off. Yes. There's a Death in the family. It's hard to grow up normally when Grandfather rides a white horse and wields a scythe—especially when you have to take over the family business, and everyone mistakes you for the Tooth Fairy. And especially when you have to face the new and addictive music that has entered Discworld. It's lawless. It changes people. It's called MUSIC WITH ROCKS IN. It's got a beat and you can dance to it but...It's ALIVE. And it won't fade away. |
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Interesting Times (1994)
Rincewind the Wizzard [sic] never wanted an interesting life. Boredom suits him just fine! But when a carrier albatross arrives from the Counterweight Continent with an Urgent Request for a "Great Wizard," Rincewind is called upon to "volunteer." And so Rincewind finds himself transported to the endangered Empire of Hong, Sung, Fang, Tang, and McSweeney, where a new Emperor - and a Great Wizard! - are about to be chosen. In the Empire, swords are outlawed and only outlaws have swords. Luckily, one of the outlaws is Rincewind's oldest (literally) friend, Cohen the Barbarian, the 95-year-old master of the oath-uttering and heroic butchery. Rincewind and Ghenghiz (Cohen's first name) have other allies as well: an ant farm-powered computer named Hex; a fractal weather-making butterfly with mandelbrot wings; the dreaded Four Horsemen of the Common Cold (Sniffles, Chesty, Nostril, and Lack of Tissues); and a ferocious, if slow-moving army of six old men, the Silver Horde. Their mission is to either defend or destroy the Forbidden City of Hunghung. The instructions are not entirely clear... |
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Maskerade (1995)
Maskerade, which on more than one occasion is laugh-out-loud funny, is the tantalizing story of an opera house in Discworld's capital city. This is no ordinary opera house, however; this one's haunted, and not by one of those passive hang-out-and-observe types of ghosts, either. No, this ghost is devious and dreadful and terrorizes the entire company with his pranks. Can the witch Perdita X. Nitt help save the day, and get the role she's always dreamed of landing in the process? |
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Feet of Clay (1996)
A murderer is stalking Discworld. A prowling perp who jauntily leaves behind corpses and strange-smelling tracks of curious white clay. A grim reaper who belongs to neither the Assassins' Guild not the Thieves' Guild. Commander Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Guard is determined to stop this unauthorized assassin - and to prove it, he has hired a Dwarf to help him. With the assistance of Corporal Cheery Littlebottom, Vimes and his men (and trolls, and such) can get to the, well, bottom of anything. But when Vimes unravels a living (and, in fact, complaining) Coat-of-Arms and finds an unexpected royal clue, he is faced with a new dilemma. Fighting crime is one thing. But what if winning means inflicting a new King on a city that does very well, thank you, with no King at all? |
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Hogfather (1996)
IT'S THE NIGHT BEFORE HOGSWATCH AND IT'S TOO QUIET. Where is the big jolly fat man? Why is Death creeping down chimneys and trying to say Ho Ho Ho? The darkest night of the year is getting a lot darker.Susan the gothic governess has got to sort it out by morning, otherwise there won't be a morning. Ever again. As they say: You'd better watch out. |
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Jingo (1997)
Discworld goes to war, with armies of sardines, warriors, fishermen, squid and at least one very camp follower. As two armies march, Commander Vimes of Ankh-Morpork City Watch faces unpleasant foes who are out to get him ... and that's just the people on his side. The enemy might be even worse. |
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Last Continent, the (1998)
Something is seriously amiss at Unseen University, Ankh-Morpork's most prestigious (i.e., only) institution of higher learning. A professor is missing — and not just any professor. The Egregious Professor of Cruel and Unusual Geography. Also the University Librarian, who transmuted (you know how things change!) into an ape (a handy configuration for a librarian, don't you think) so long ago that no one exactly remembers his name, least of all himself. But fear not, the search is on! The Lecturer in Recent Runes and the Chair of Indefinite Studies, as well as the Dean and the Archchancellor, will follow the trail wherever it leads — even to the other side of Discworld, where the Last Continent, Fourecks, is under construction. Imagine a magical land as bald as a baby's bottom, where there are no trees; where rain is but a myth; where there are precious few animals (and few of them are precious). You have just imagined Fourecks (EcksEcksEcksEcks)* where even the ordinary is strange (the four legged duck, for example), as though evolution is being hurried up with the intention of sorting things out as soon as possible. Experience the terror as the University's bold would-be rescuers encounter the cowardly Wizard Rincewind, a Mad Dwarf armed with a crossbow, Death, Death of Rats, and even a Creator of two. Feel the passion as the bizarre denizens of the Last Continent learn what happens when rain falls out of the sky and rivers actually fill with water. (It utterly spoils regattas, for one thing.) Thrill to the promise of next year's regatta, in remote, rustic Didjabringabeeralong. It'll be absolutely gujeroo. *Not Australia. Honest. |
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Carpe Jugulum (1998)
Mightily Oats has not picked a good time to be a priest. He thought he'd come down to Lancre for a simple ceremony. Now he's caught up in a war between vampires and witches. There's Young Agnes, who is really in two minds about everything. Magrat, who is trying to combine witchcraft and nappies, Nanny Ogg.... and Granny Weatherwax, who is big trouble. And the vampires are intelligent. They've got style and fancy waistcoats. They've got out of their casket, and want a bite of the future. Mightily Oats knows he has a prayer, but he wishes he had an axe. |
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Fifth Elephant, the (1999)
Sam Vimes is a man on the run. Yesterday he was a duke, a chief of police and the ambassador to the mysterious fat-rich country of Uberwald. Now he has nothing but his native wit and the gloomy trousers of Uncle Vanya (don't ask). It's snowing. It's freezing. And if he can't make it through the forest to civilisation there's going to be a terrible war. But there are monsters on his trail. They're bright. They're fast. They're werewolves—and they're catching up. Sam Vimes is out of time, out of luck, and already out of breath. |
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Truth, the (2000)
William de Worde is the accidental editor of the Discworld's first newspaper. Now he must cope with the traditional perils of a journalist's life - people who want him dead, a recovering vampire with a suicidal fascination for flash photographing, some more people who want him dead in a different way and, worst of all, the man who keeps begging him to publish pictures of his humorously shaped potatoes. William just wants to get at the Truth. Unfortunately, everyone else wants to get at William. And it's only the third edition... |
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Thief of Time (2001)
In Discworld, Time is a resource managed by the highly capable Monks of History who store it and pump it from places where it is wasted, like underwater (how much time do fish really need?) to places, like cities, where there's never enough of it. Ironically, the construction of the world's first truly accurate clock threaten to stop Time altogether. And so begins a literal race against Time for the monk Lu Tze and his apprentice. For if the perfect clock starts ticking, Time, as we know it, will stop. And then the trouble will really begin. Subtle, sly, thought-provoking, and hilarious, Thief of Time is Terry Pratchett at his best. |
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Night Watch (2002)
Commander Sam Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch had it all. But now he's back in his own rough, tough past without even the clothes he was standing up in when the lightning struck. Living in the past is hard. Dying in the past is incredibly easy. But he must survive, because he has a job to do. He must track down a murderer, teach his younger self how to be a good copper and change the outcome of a bloody rebellion. There's a problem: if he wins, he's got no wife, no child, no future. A Discworld Tale of One City, with a full chorus of street urchins, ladies of negotiable affection, rebels, secret policemen and other children of the revolution. Truth! Justice! Freedom! And a Hard-boiled Egg! |
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Monstrous Regiment (2003)
It began as a sudden fancy... Polly Perks had to become a boy in a hurry. Cutting off her hair and wearing trousers was easy. Learning to fart and belch in public and walk like an ape took more time... And now she's englisted in the army, and in searching for her lost brother. But there's a war on. There's always a war on. And Polly and her fellow recruits are suddenly in the thick of it, without any training, and the enemy is hunting them. All they have on their side is the most arful seargeant in the army and a vampire with a lust for coffee. Well... they have the Secret. And they take the war to the heart of the enemy, they have to use all the resources of... the Monstrous Regiment. |
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Going Postal (2004)
Moist von Lipwig is a con artist and a fraud and a man faced with a life choice: be hanged, or put Ankh-Morpork's ailing postal service back on its feet. It's a tough decision. But he's got to see that the mail gets through, come rain, hail, sleet, dogs, the Post Office Workers' Friendly and Benevolent Society, the evil chairman of the Grand Trunk Semaphore Company, and a midnight killer. Getting a date with Adora Bell Dearheart would be nice, too. Maybe it'll take a criminal to succeed where honest men have failed, or maybe it's a death sentence either way. Or perhaps there's a shot at redemption in the mad world of the mail, waiting for a man who's prepared to push the envelope. |
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Thud! (2005)
Koom Valley? That was where the trolls ambushed the dwarfs, or the dwarfs ambushed the trolls. It was far away. It was a long time ago. But if he doesn't solve the murder of just one dwarf, Commander Sam Vines of Ankh-Morpork City Watch is going to see it fought again, right outside his office. With his beloved Watch crumbling, he must unravel every clue, outwit every assassin and brave any darkness to find the solution. And darkness is following him. Oh...and at six o'clock every day, without fail, with no excuses, he must go home to read Where's My Cow?, with all the right farmyard noises, to his little boy. There are some things you have to do. |