A person without a cause to embrace is much like a fish without feet.

- The Book of Todd, the Subterfuge Chapter, stanza 3

SAVE THE SYNTHS!!!!

Every year hundreds of thousands of Synths are needlessly slaughtered to make such useless fabrics as polyester and rayon!!!

They will be wiped out within the year without YOUR help!!

STOP THE SLAUGHTER STOP THE GRADUAL EXTINCTION OF AN ENTIRE SPECIES!!!

Please don't let them go the way of the Naga or the Blue-Spotted whale, we need your help.

Author's note: No Synths were ever in danger during the writing of the above make-believe Sally Struthers-type desperate plea; although several semicolons were cruelly ignored.

The following would be sung to the tune of "People are Strange" by the late (?), great Jim Morrison:

People are sheep, Constantly bleating,

Never freethinking, They travel in flocks

They watch the same sitcoms, They wear the same clothing,

They even laugh with the laugh tracks

When you're a sheep (baaaa...)

You do nothing but bleat.

When you're a sheep (baaaa..)

You think Clinton's real neat

Spike a tree!

Save the whales!

Love a goat!

baaaa...baaaa...baaaaaa...

.. Not that I have anything against tree-huggers, per se.

Trees are great, and our children should all have the chance to climb one or two.

I think tree spiking is a bit much though...SHEESH!

Speaking of fanatics... Doesn't it ever occur to them that by infringing on others' rights in the self-righteous, wholly misguided attempt to liberate them is inherently contradictory?

::sigh:: Probably not.

Just remember: Guns don't kill people. People kill people.

...And if they didn't have a gun, then they'd be using knives, bombs or the eponymous 'blunt instrument'.