School Days...yes, folks, today is my first day of school.

I skipped my History class...ah, the freedom. Seriously, I had stuff to do. I'm looking forward to my English Comp course this afternoon, though. I think I still know what a gerund is.

There will be updates coming in the next week....I'll be revamping the main page to make it more visitor friendly; A new page will be coming, this one to have poetry and stuff on it, to include a very good poem by my friend, Sarah. Plus, I just have things to say about politics, demonic kittens, myopic lemmings, snarling trout and other odds and ends to include, yes, LINKS.

So, be patient....the Book will continue.

Just something to tide you over until then:

The Ballad of Nibs, The IMAHD Stricken Kitten

- A Thingie, Of Sorts. Not brought to you by the fine, tree-hugging folks at Granola

Her rushing to and fro started one God-forsaken Friday 'morn,

About a quarter or half-past three.

And by two, That afternoon,

She was still as wired as wired could be.

At near wit's end I hit upon the answer, A way I could be set free;

I needed to take Nibs to a Vet, One who specialized in pet psychiatry.

"Full are her food and water bowls, Yes, Her litter box is clean;

There just is no logical reason, For her to me be so mean!"

"I cannot eat, I cannot sleep, She even follows me to the bathroom when I pee!

Kitty Shrink dude, what am I to do? That demon spawn kitten won't let me be!"

"Is it Valium or Demerol she needs?" I asked him,

"Or maybe a partial lobotomy?"

"Is there anything that will calm her down, And allow me to retain my sanity."

"Tut! Tut!" he tutted, "Pooh, Pooh," he poohed;

"These things for which you ask of me, I simply will not do!"

"For only I am knowledgeable in the ways of kittens,

A subject about which you obviously have no clue."

"She is but a happy, normal kitten," he furthered,

"And she is clever in every way.

Why just observe how regally she acts, While inside that plastic bag she plays."

"Nonsense, Sir! You are an ass!"

"Suffocation is not a game!"

"Upon your head, should she wake up dead,

And only you to blame!"

"Now forty minutes you've studied her intently, Scholarly noises you've clucked and hummed;

During which time you've failed to notice

Her singular pre-occupation, with the licking of her bum."

"Ah-Ha!" Cried he, "How blind was I not to see!"

"There is really nothing wrong with Nibs, Except that she suffers from Eye Emm Ay Haich Dee."

"But drugs I cannot prescribe her, For under the auspices of PETA this just cannot be;

Legally though, she can receive counseling, When she's aged 12 months, Plus three."

"Preposterous!" You may cry, But verily, this I say is so:

The Kitty Shrinks, her they will not treat, until six more months she grows.

So hear me, gentle readers, And empathetically feel my woe;

For I have an Intentionally Malevolent And Hyperactively Disordered Kitten, Gnawing upon my toe.

Well, that's it for now.

I'll try to update this every major page update.

Enjoy the rest of the Book,

-Pat