"It just ain't easy being green."

- easily attributed to David Banner, popular vegetables, or really jealous people as they are being carted off to the booby-hatch/prison/really big rocket-ship blasting the world's undesirables into space after killing his/her loved one, boiling said loved one's daughter's pet rabbit, or slashing their tires/throat/other unmentionables.

Disclaimer: The above laundry list is not meant to offend Mr. Banner, Veggies, or psychotic loonies...

One of my jobs while I was teaching for the army was to be a junior faculty advisor (like a guidance counselor, I guess).

I was assigned a group of students (usually four or five out of a class of 30) that I was responsible for guiding, mentoring, and helping through the course by doing things such as monitoring my students' progress through the booth and helping to edit their reports, etc.

Well, one time I had a student who, although very bright, was still doing poorly in the course.

So, after a succession of very abysmal practical exercises I sat down to talk to him and figure out what was wrong...

...about halfway through our conversation I became annoyed at the fact that he was staring at the desk, the wall, his notebook, the floor; everywhere but at me and I said, "How do you expect to pass this course if you can't even look at the person you are talking with?"

"mumble, mumble, mumble," he responded.

"Excuse me?"

"I see colors, Sergeant," he repeated while his face turned a shade of red seldom seen.

I blinked at him, keeping my face neutral, "Colors?"

"Yes, colors."

"Do you mean that you see auras?"

"What are those?"

"Colors that surround people. Do you see those?"

"Oh. I've never known what those were. Yes, that's what I see."

"Hmmm..." I said, thinking this kind of odd. "Well, what color am I?"

"Green."

"Green?"

"Yes, green."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"I don't know, Sergeant!" he cried. "And that really bugs me."

After some minor research into this I have found that a "green aura" is normally associated with communication; it also indicates a healthy, charming, balanced, sensual, sensible, calming individual.

...It is also associated with one who is conniving.

So, although this green thing might explain the affinity and trust that normal household pets and and small children feel towards me, I still remain bugged by that conniving part.