DAY TWO:

 

Disclaimer: With the exception of Glyph Bellchime and Bryan Weber, all of the

characters appearing within, or at least certain species such as changeling and

cybertronian, are the property of their respective owners and are used without

permission. Please don't sue us. It's all in fun and humor, and we aren't making

any money on this.

 

Bryan's special disclaimer: Any and all comments about PMS were not made by me!

That joke was Glyph's, and as a woman, she's entitled. So please, please,

please, do not assume that I am a typical chauvinistic sexist male pig.

 

Glyph's notes: Yes, I am a woman, for those who have been giving Bryan flack on

that point.  And this has been a joint writing. The section is one that had

happened after a very bad day at work for me. I write, therefore, I vent. It

just seemed to fit.

 

 

Bryan awoke from his slumber feeling like a new man.

"It's a good thing I can still mimic the abilities of the people on my ship," He

said, stretching, "Ryoko's regenerative powers come in handy at times."

"Breakfast is ready," Shinji called out.

"Great! I'm starved!" Ryoga said. He started to roll up the sleeping bag.

"Likewise," Tenchi nodded, "I may miss Sasami's cooking, but at least Washuu

isn't trying to manhandle me this morning."

"Ohayo, Tenchi," Washuu popped up, her eyes gleaming with innocence. The others

on the ship knew better. Andrew even ducked, seemingly looking innocent while

trying to find a cereal box.

"WAIT!" Tenchi protested as he was dragged off by his ear, "C'mon, guys, help

me!"

"We'll try and save you some food, Tenchi!" Bryan called. Tenchi wasn't too

assured, due to the fact that all the other guys had a Vegeta style grin on

their faces.

"Save him some. Yeah, right," Ryoga said, "I learned in junior high that if you

want your bread, ya gotta fight for it!"

"Here ya go," Shinji handed a plate to Ryoga. Ryoga was about to dig in, when he

suddenly looked green. He definitely was about to be sick.

"AHHH! What is this? ARE YOU INSANE!?" Ryoga pointed his finger at Shinji, "Is

this some sort of sick joke?"

"Ryoga," Shinji said in his most patient voice, "It's turkey bacon."

"Huh?"  the boy blinked. Ryoga grew a little red at his outburst. "Oh. Sorry."

REBB slid in, in his griffin form. He stuck his head in behind Andrew and pulled

a bowl out with his teeth.

"Your usual, REBB?" Andrew asked.

"Uh-hmm," the griffin responded around the ceramic. Andrew took it from him,

then proceeded to mix something in it. REBB rocked back, suddenly trotting on

Pathos's feet.

"NEEEOOOWW!" the boy meowed.

"Hey, watch it!" Shinji added. Pathos held his foot with tears in his eyes.

"That foot me, trod on own!" Pathos yelped.

Soon the large griffin got its hindquarters back into the hall. The liquid

looked orangish, and smelled very fruity.

Bryan got curious. "What is that, REBB?"

"Why, you want to try some?"

Andrew suddenly began to signal wildly, NO, no, no, no, nonononono. Bad idea!

But then Bryan had his spoon in it, and had tried to swallow some. He choked,

and grabbed for the milk glass. Andrew had then handed him a water glass.

"Are you all right, Bryan?" Zechs, who had worked his way around, looked

concerned. Bryan finally though had gotten some air. "Was that sour?"

"No, too damn sweet!" Bryan picked up a napkin to wipe his tongue. "What was in

that?"

Andrew finally smirked. "What REBB eats every morning is orange juice, milk, and

about a BAG of sugar mixed together. He has a problem eating processed foods."

 

The guys weren't the only ones having breakfast troubles.

"Breakfast, everybody!" Sasami called from the kitchen. She looked worried.

"What's up, Sasami-chan?" Ukyo said, walking by, patting the little girl on the

head.

"Well, it's just..."

                "Morning, Ukyo," Akane said, coming out of the kitchen, carrying

a large plate of...something. Akane was beaming with the sort of pride one has

at a job well done.

"A-akane cooked?" Ukyo whispered it, knowing full well what would happen if she

voiced it loud enough to hear.

"She woke up before I did," Sasami explained, "I didn't have the heart to tell

her that she should probably stay out of the kitchen."

Ukyo sighed. This could be very, very bad.

"It gets worse," Sasami said, "She wasn't the only one to beat me."

Ayeka walked out of the kitchen, "Oh, hello, Miss Ukyo. I trust you slept well."

Ukyo suppressed the urge to fall on her face, and looked worriedly at Sasami,

"Tell me there's good news."

"Well, I did manage to squeeze some fresh orange juice."

Just then, they heard a loud scream from the deck above. Akane and Ayeka both

recognized it as the scream of a person in trouble, and took off to investigate.

Ukyo was about to follow, but Sasami grabbed her sleeve.

"It's just Tenchi and Washuu," Sasami said, "I'd recognize that scream anywhere.

Quick, while we have an opening, we have to synthesize something edible that

still looks like this."

"Is that really honest, Sasami?" Ukyo asked.

"Do you really want to compare my sister's cooking with Akane's? I've read the

files in the galley logs."

Ukyo had read similar files aboard the JEDRI. She shivered at the thought.

"Eeesh! You toss this, I'll program the synthesizer."

Sasami grimaced. "Right."

 

Tenchi looked at all the little gadgets in the lab aboard the Drummond. Washuu

had a gleam in her eye that outshone what she usually wore. That always meant

trouble-no matter what.

But then it seemed like she stopped, without doing anything. Washuu held a

strange device between her fingers. It was small, compact, and rather attractive

in some ways.

"Um, Washuu-chan," Tenchi threw in the scientist's favorite honorific, hoping to

stay on her good side, "Just what is that for?"

"Well, I'll leave that up to your imagination. Heeheehee!"

Just then, the door opened, and Ayeka stormed in, "MISS WASHUU!!!!"

Washuu sighed, "Washuu-chan, dearie."

 

Glyph woke up later than the others, but she obviously felt better. She

stretched. Her hands reached up and found the bed top. When she used to go to

sleepovers, she had to always reorient herself. It took her a few minutes again.

"Okay, I'm aboard the Drummond, right? Zod?"

"Glyph, you are on the Drummond, but you'd better get down to the galley," Zod

responded. "There seems to be a little incursion."

Glyph was on her feet, heading quickly there. She even left her gear in Bryan's

room.

All she had was a feeling of UT OH!

 

When the girls gathered for breakfast, they were a little surprised. "Is this

food?" Asuka blurted out.

But in seeing a very brave Rei try it out, she grabbed a little. She had heard

Glyph mutter that she always agreed with her mother on cooking: the messier the

food usually the better it tastes.

"Is everyone all right?" Glyph came in a hurry, looking very worried indeed.

But in seeing everyone starting to sit down to breakfast, made Glyph a little

puzzled. What had Zod been so alarmed about? She picked up a small bit that

halfway-resembled hash browns. She popped this in her mouth. As the others

started in as well, she commented, "Hey, nice job, Sasami, or was it you Ukyo?"

Oh, well, Sasami thought, at least keep the illusion up for now.

"Uhm, it wasn't me or Ukyo this morning, and Belldandy neither."

"Nani?" Glyph asked.

"Akane and Ayeka did."

 

PHFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

You can guess who had the spit takes!

 

Andrew enjoyed the shower, and even though in company in the tub nearby, it was

actually fun.

"You know, except for there isn't much space devoted to the bathroom, I could

get used to the way Japanese baths are."

Ryoga smiled. "Yeah, I am glad that even-EH!"

A bright light shimmered on the TV monitor (Andrew liked to catch the morning

news while he groomed). Then a recognizable form came through it.

"YIPE!" Andrew grabbed a nearby towel. "URD! Don't you know how to knock?!" He

didn't hear the funny bang behind him.

The Megami stopped. She fluffed her hair back. "I see what Glyph sees in you."

"URD! I NEVER HIT LADIES, BUT YOU MAY BE THE FIRST!" Andrew roared. "GET OUTTA HERE! Ryoga and I were taking showers, so unless--!"

Urd looked unperturbed. "I only see you in here."

Andrew looked around. Huh? He was seemingly alone in the bathroom. Andrew

scratched at his cheek, which he did when he was extremely confused. Then he

looked at Urd a little more objectively.

She was wearing only a bathing towel, which showed-oh dear! OH DEAR!

And if he knew Ryoga any...

"Aw crap! He's gonna drown!" Andrew skidded to the tub edge. He lifted on the

sunken boy's shoulders. Ryoga looked a little dazed.

But by the time he got turned around, Urd was gone. "Aw man. This is war!"

Andrew stopped Ryoga's nosebleed with another towel. "You okay, Hibiki?"

"IMB FINE! I hib I dose on da FAUCET!"

"I thought you couldn't be hurt because of the Bakusai Tenketsu?"

"I slippft preddy har!"

Vegeta walked into the shower, and saw Andrew kneeling by Ryoga, "Oh.

Um...Sorry. Didn't mean to intrude..."

"WHAT?!" Andrew and Ryoga yelled, but Vegeta was already gone.

Andrew looked Ryoga in the eye, "Oh, she is sooooo gonna get it!"

"You said it."

 

Glyph was passing out new pages to everyone, "Here's the next clue in the

treasure hunt, everyone."

 

"There's a ship of the sea, sailing through space

It's mission to save the whole human race.

Smaller than life, but without fail

Imitated down to the last detail."

 

Ranma scratched her head in puzzlement, "A ship of the sea, sailing through

space?"

"I knew Mom's clues would be impossible," Ryoko grumbled.

"Geez, you guys don't watch TV at all, do you?" Skuld asked, "It's clearly an

old school anime!"

"Oh, which one?" Asuka asked.

"I don't know! It's old school. Urd's domain is the past. Mine is the future."

"We may have to visit the library," Ranma said

"You haven't heard yet, have you?" Ryoko gave a weak smile.

 

"The library is WHAT?" Ayeka asked, not sure she'd heard properly.

"The library is a massive catalogue of all anime, sci-fi, fantasy, and science

novels ever written, directed, filmed, on any planet, in any dimension. Washuu

had to set it up in pseudo space. The"A"section alone takes up a continent,"

Belldandy said in a cheerful tone.

"Not a problem," Lain smirked, "I can get inside the cataloguing system,

remember? I'll just start looking for some good cross-references. Zod was

designed to access all of it at a moment's notice. It's one of the reasons he

isn't as human as Shara. Most of the programming is for sheer speed. That, and

Shara was assembled by someone with a better knowledge of computers."

"I suppose we'd better get crackin'," Ukyo sighed, "Still, that phrase, 'to save

the human race'...It rings a bell..."

 

"Space Battleship Yamato," Urd sighed, looking at her fingernails.

"Are you sure?" Akane asked.

"I know that show," Sasami said, "They play it in the early mornings sometimes.

Tenchi was gonna buy it on DVD for me."

"Trust me, kiddo," Urd said, smiling, "The past is my domain, y'know."

"Now that you mention it," Rei put her hand on her chin in thought, "Bryan had

just bought a die cast replica of the ship...But I don't know where he put it."

"Wouldn't something like that be in his room?" Akane asked.

"We'd never find it in there," Rei said, "Bryan's room is a clutter of

memorabilia, wall scrolls, posters, PVCs, and models. I think he has half the

Gundams in there."

"Or, he might have it with him," Urd said, "I wouldn't put it past him."

 

Bryan was sneezing like crazy, which didn't help, because he was trying to make

a rational argument.

"You can't send Happosai back over there!"

Zechs and Cypher nodded.

"Just to Urd's room," Andrew said, "We owe her!"  He had explained about the

bathroom incident.

"Yeah, we heard your screech!" Cypher muttered. The other glared at him.

"Andrew," Bryan tried the reasonable tone, "Think. It's Happosai. None of us can

control him. And think of who else is over there. What if he tries to peep at

Glyph?"

Andrew sighed, wincing. "I see your point."

"Too bad I don't," Happosai said, coming into the room, "Oh, are you all gonna

get it!"

"How did you get untied?!" they both demanded. Andrew about had to squeak it

past his teeth.

"Shame on you. You don't think I'm the Master of the Founding School of Anything

Goes Martial Arts for nothing, do you? Now, you're gonna get a taste of my

medicine! HAPPO-FIRE BURST!"

Andrew pushed Bryan to the side, rolling both of them near the wall. The

explosion happened behind them. "Shara! Stop him!" he hollered. He pulled a

weapon from the subspace armband that REBB and Washuu had provided for everyone

on the crew.

Then Bryan noticed something, Andrew's face! There on his left cheek was a

birthmark, shaped like a crude purple tiger lily, half hidden by the swatch of

red hair.

The more I deal with these people, Bryan thought, the more I wonder what I have

gotten myself into.

Happosai seemed ready for Andrew, throwing another happo-fire burst.  This time,

Andrew couldn't duck it. He coughed, but didn't over come to effects of Happy's

pyrotechnic device. Bryan had just barely gotten his hand over his mouth. But

the martial artist was gone!

"Damn!" Andrew swore.

 

REBB sat up. He got onto his haunches in griffin form. The cybertronian tried to

recall what had happened when he had gone to check if Happosai wanted any

breakfast. He remembered seeing Happy getting loose, but not much more after

that. He noticed the trail of hypodermic darts that scattered the floor. They

were registered not to hit his bio-signature. Then what had knocked him out for

a few seconds?

He glanced to where the bundle of ties were. Something was still in them,

because it was moving. He changed into his robotic form, then tore open the

ties. Ryoga's knots were secure. How in the world had that old geezer get outta

that then? he thought.

"Puck? Puck-rep-puck!" Fuzzy growled when she found herself out of the ropes.

She hissed.

"Miya! My-aye-yah! Meow!" a Ryo-Oki crystal snarled. REBB needed no translation

from what they were saying. They were mad.

"MEW!" Mew agreed. All three somehow had gotten tied together.

REBB stopped the pokemon. "What happened, did Happy do this to you?"

## YES. ## the pokemon flashed his sign up. ## Where is that smeghead? I'm

gonna--##

REBB smiled, "You gotta stop watching Red Dwarf, there, kiddo."

 

"Good grief, I'm starting feel like that idiot," Ukyo grumbled. When the two

teams met in the library, it was rather unusual. For once, they were quiet.

Especially, Ayeka and Ryoko, considering the monumental look of the library...

Washuu smiled.  Or rather a holographic version of Washuu did. She held several

yellow, clear cards. A total of eight to be exact. She held a green one in her

right hand.

"A card to gain access to files, solve these riddles, avoid the miles," she

giggled, then muttered, "Ugh, that stunk! Why in the hell do I gotta rhyme

this?"

The girls paused. Then by odd coincidence, both Ryoko and Ukyo both came

forward.

"Pick one," the hologram fanned them out. She left the green one out.

Ryoko picked one from the left hand, Ukyo the right. Two computers opened up.

"Slide the cards in.," the hologram instructed. The girls did. "Your answers

will be covered by the computer. Ten minutes access to the computer once the

riddle is solved."

Some of the girls groaned. "Only ten minutes?"

"You still have six chances to try."

Then they all turned to the questions.

 

Ukyo paused. "No access to this box! Duh! No hinges, lock or lid! Yet you want

the gold treasure inside? Crack it. Is it a box or an egg?" the computer had on

the screen.

Ryoko had one just as difficult. "A Zen moment! Room that isn't a room! If you

don't get it, you're brain is full of mush. Is it a living room or a mush room?"

"Kinda insulting, aren't they?" Ranma snorted to keep from laughing. But Ukyo

pressed the answer first.

"What do you need?" the terminal asked.

"Lain, your turn," Ukyo scooted quickly away.

Once Lain had gotten access in; it was quick that she got the answer. She then

covered her mouth to keep from blurting it out.

Ryoko had gotten her answer, but did not notice when the other team left the

library.

 

"Well?"

Lain smiled slightly. It seemed so unusual to see it. "A replica of Space

Battleship Yamato."

"That's it?" Ayeka tilted her head.

"That's it, Davie!" Lain joked. The puzzled looks on the others made her realize

that they didn't get it.

"Where would we find that?"

 

Ranma pushed her cuticles back. There were five cards left and each of them were

taking a turn. Ryoko had tried ships in general, Asuka had at least linked anime

within the latter half of the 1970s, and Skuld was trying now: sailing ships +

anime.

It had only given a few answers. Ranma kept still, and still thinking on the

riddle. It was rather good coincidence that in his classes one of the subjects

had been mythology of other countries. He had chosen Greece. He then remembered

something about a ship and some sort of singing group that hypnotized the crew.

That ship was the...

She banged her head with her hand.

"Ranma, your turn," Skuld muttered.

Ranma picked a card. Her riddle was, " Red, red, red as a rose, yet still black

and white? How can this be? Is it a flower or a newspaper?"

"Easy, a newspaper." Ranma smiled. She tapped the screen.

Then she tried her idea.

"What do you need?"

"Search," Ranma muttered under her breath. "Argo plus Anime."

It hit.

 

Urd was not happy. She and the others were rooting through Bryan's room,

searching for the die-cast ship. They'd found three wall scrolls of Rei Ayanami,

two posters of Asuka, four posters of the Tenchi cast, a dozen manga volumes,

including the hard to find Akira trades, a 1/100 scale Eva Unit 01 in berserk

mode, all the 1/144 scale Gundams from Gundam Wing, a PVC from Princess

Mononoke, and a model of every Enterprise ever. But no Yamato.

"At least they're nice scrolls of me," Rei commented, looking at them the way an

art critic would.

"Will you forget about that! We're supposed to be looking for that ship!" Akane

huffed.

"I told you we wouldn't find it in here," Rei said, sighing, "Even if it were

here, we'd never find it."

"Maybe a more direct approach is what's called for here," Urd smirked. She

walked over to the TV in Bryan's room...

 

Bryan was sitting on the bridge of the JEDRI, using the viewscreen to scour the

ship visually. He wasn't finding what he was looking for.

"How can one little pervert be so much trouble?" he wondered aloud. He received

no answer, which wasn't surprising. All the others were using a more active

search method.

"Shuttlepods are clear," Cypher reported in.

"Nothing in the engine room," Zechs said, "And Vegeta reports that the Jeffries

tubes are clear."

"Mess Hall is clear," Shinji said.

"I'm checking the theater now," Ryoga reported, "No sign of him."

"Why do I feel like I'm in the middle of a scary movie?" Bryan muttered. Just

then, the viewscreen shimmered, and Urd came out of it. Bryan let out a scream.

"Oh, is that any way to greet a lady?" Urd asked, "I just wanted to ask you a

question, Bryan."

She had one of her hands on his chin, and was rubbing the other hand on his

chest.

"If you don't knock that off, I'm gonna start to take it personal," Bryan said,

blushing.

"Oh, don't you like me?"

            "Urd, I'm well aware that you're up to something, so what is it?"

"Well, I want your die-cast Yamato."

"Is that what you kids are calling it these days?"

"Now you're being difficult."

            "Yes I am."

"In that case..."

 

Andrew and the others came running when they'd heard Bryan scream, and then the

comm signal went dead.  Someone had even tagged Ryoga before he got lost again.

They heard yelling from down the corridor, "Knock that off! Don't do that! Keep

your hands away from there! OW! Hey-HEY!!!"

They opened the doors to see the viewscreen shimmering, and Bryan tied into very

interesting knots in the middle of the bridge.

"Are you all right?" Andrew asked.

"I want you to do two things for me, Andrew, old friend. First I want you to

find me a very good chiropractor."

"And second?"

"Tell me what that plan of yours for getting even with Urd was again."

 

Glyph was opening the gateway to send Tenchi back to the JEDRI. He'd been tied

up in the lab all morning, where she'd found him. She'd been looking for the

coffee pot, and for some reason, the only one on the ship was in the lab. She'd

found poor Tenchi Masaki tied up and starving. Washuu had been called away, so

she let the boy down and retrieved his clothes. "Sorry about that, I forgot

about Washuu does to people she likes."

Tenchi only nodded, before giving a smile, "At least, it's normal for me."

"Hope you feel better," She said, as the gateway opened. There was a sudden

streak of motion coming from the JEDRI side.

"WHAT!!" She blurted, then realized who she was looking at.  "I thought you were

tied up, Happy!"

"I was. But no knots are gonna keep me down, no sir!" And with that he was off

like a shot. Glyph pulled out her light bo, and looked at Tenchi, sheepishly.

"I hate to ask this, but could you possibly help me round him up? I'm rather

surprised he didn't get here sooner."

            Tenchi shrugged, "I wasn't doing anything anyway. Besides, maybe we can

swing by the kitchen and snag a bit of food from Sasami or something."

 

"So did you find out?" Sasami eagerly asked Urd upon her return.

"I'm afraid he didn't have it on him," Urd said, "And I frisked him real well,

too."

Rei shook her head, "It's on this ship. Where is the question."

 

"It's a what?" Ryoko asked.

"A replica of the Argo, or Yamato," Ranma said, "The show was called Space

Battleship Yamato in Japan. But in America, it was renamed Starblazers, and the

ship was renamed the Argo. I remember 'cause they were tellin' us about it in

school once."

Ryoko snapped her fingers, "That thing! I think Bryan keeps it on the bridge!"

 

Shara spoke up, "Bryan, it occurred to me that if I couldn't pick up Happosai on

my internal arrays, it's because he's in one of three blind spots. One is in the

engine room behind the duranium shielding, another is in the shuttlebay by the

tractor beam array, and the last one is in the Infinite Improbability Generator

Room, because of the screening. The last one is the only place we haven't

looked, and guess where one of the gates to the Drummond just opened up."

"Just peachy," Bryan mumbled. There was a sharp cracking sound, "OUCH!! Andrew,

when I said chiropractor, I didn't mean REBB."

"Just hold still," REBB was grinning, "and this won't hurt ... " then out of ear

shot. "Much."

"HOLD STILL!? I can't move an inch, and you want me to hold still? And it does

too hurt!"

REBB shrugged, "Well, sure, 'cause ya got a poor attitude about it..."

"You sure you know what you're doing?! Argh!"

REBB finally smiled completely, "Hey, Shara, what page was that on again?"

Bryan yipped. "WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!"

REBB  laughed, "A joke! A joke!", but when Bryan let out a groan, he took a

quick glance in the book Washuu had left behind. He did know what he was doing,

just needed a little review.

 

Ryoko stepped onto the bridge. No one was around, except for the rest of her

group. She had been minimally up here, because Bryan usually controlled the

Drummond with his own thought processes through Zod. And Rei was the better

pilot. So if she had seen the ship it would have to be...

Asuka suddenly screamed.

"SWEETOOO!" the familiar yell caused all of them to stop.

Opfh, Skuld noticed Ranma growling, but she echoed the sentiment. Couldn't those

idiots keep that hentai tied up?!!

But then Skuld and Ryoko ducked into each other, just as Asuka took a swing at

the old geezer.

Ryoko found herself leaning against the piloting console.

She threw one of lightening bolts she had on hand.

"Ryoko, NO!" Zod electronically yipped. Then something popped and fizzled at the

console that it hit. Happy had ducked!

 

Then she found a certain leech... hanging to her shirt!

 

Glyph and Tenchi both heard the scream. They raced further into the ship, up to

the bridge.

"Duck!" Tenchi yelped, this time knocking Glyph out of the way. Ryoko screamed,

flying at a very fast pace. Right behind her was Happy-calling her with rather

sweet names. He looked a little singed.

"Get him away from MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" she yelped.

Glyph looked at Tenchi. Then they both looked down the corridor where Ryoko

tossed another lightening bolt at Happosai.

"What the hell is he made of?" both of them muttered. Glyph suddenly whistled,

getting the martial artist's attention. She then threw something out. It was a

bra.

Tenchi looked at her. He was really looking at her, wondering what he had gotten

into.

"Sweeto!" Happy seemed to sing.

Then a little hole in subspace swallowed him.

Tenchi gasped, but then smiled. Glyph tilted her head, flicking her blue bangs

clear of her face.

"Gotta love Washuu!" she laughed.

 

Happosai wondered where he ended up for a few minutes.

 

Glyph and Tenchi entered the bridge cautiously. There seemed to be nobody. A few

consoles fizzed, then sparked.

"Lain, Washuu-chan, we gotta problem up in the bridge," she hit her comm badge.

Washuu responded. "Uhm, Happy and Ryoko, fill ya in later, but need maintenance

work up here immediately."

Tenchi suddenly signaled. Glyph heard it, too. One soft sobbing, another seemed

a muttering of Japanese, the other just seemed like a faint understandable hiss.

They found the girls crouched behind the captain's seat. Skuld was warily

holding out a mallet. Asuka was crying out for her mom, but the most unusual was

Ranma-chan. She was kneeling, her lips moving very fast. Then she made the sign

that to Glyph looked a little like the Catholic cross.

"Calvary's here, you guys okay?"

All the girls looked up. "Whew!" Skuld muttered.

"Hey, Ranma," Asuka stopped the girl as they got up. "What was..." here she

copied the movement, "that about?"

"Since it seemed like World War Four was happening around our heads, I thought

I'd cover all my bases."

"Whatever happened to WWIII?"

"Knowing those two," Glyph smirked. "It was WAY past that..."

Then Ranma tripped over something. "What the--," she blurted.

The metal was singed, but for a moment it looked quite recognizable.

The Yamato! Glyph started to laugh.

"Any port in a storm," she joked, then the others started to laugh.

 

Glyph tagged it, wanting to return it to Bryan. "You guys can start on the next

clue," she smiled.

Then she signaled to the guy's side.

 

"Gotta warning for you guys. In about fifteen minutes there will be a temporal

distortion by the doorway to Washuu's lab, on the JEDRI, this is the default

setting for my own limited version of subspace holes. You can guess WHO is

coming back."

Bryan answered, after being unknotted. "Only fifteen minutes? Glyph waita..."

"Sorry, but that's all I got," the leader signed off.

"Glyph-wait! Damn!" he growled.

But REBB grinned at him.

 

Right at when Glyph had said, Happosai fell out of the subspace hole into the

corridor just in front of Washuu's lab.

Not that he was alone. All the guys had convened there, including Tenchi. They

formed a ring in that one spot. The only sound was the familiar cracking of

knuckles.

Then Happosai noticed the second ring. Several cabbits, pokemon, and one blue-

green alien cat surrounded the boys. Mew even perched on Andrew's shoulder.

Only one phrase passed before the swarm gathered.

"Get em!"

Happy readied quickly. "Happo-fire burst!" he yelled tossing the frequent

firework. But it didn't scatter the group. A pink ball of energy surrounded the

martial artist. There was a hiss then a dull FWOOP! before  the ball dissipated.

Ryoga cracked, chuckling. Then Cypher giggled, followed by Andrew. Bryan almost

doubled. Soon all the guys were laughing. The entire group except for one

cinder-fied Happosai laughed.

"Good one, Mew! Give me a high five!" REBB01 laughed. The little pokemon

flittered up, then tapped the large cybertronian hand.

But Mew and the others weren't finished yet.

 

Glyph used the comm system to address the other girls. "Item two has been found,

move to item three."

Sasami sighed.

 

The riddle went like this:

"More than meets the eye

in normally larger size,

but you need to get the smaller playing kind

to get this prize."

 

Bryan smiled. He closed the door to the holographic theater, and on the program.

Andrew slyly smiled. Ryoga brushed his hair out of his eyes.

Inside they heard Happosai cry that it wasn't fair.

"What program is that?" Bryan asked.

"Glyph developed it after her first encounter with Happy. She got the concept

from some Piers Anthony novels. Metria, the demoness." Andrew started to

explain. "The holographic girls dissolve if anyone tries to touch them."

"Ouch!" Tenchi grimaced. They started walking back to the bridge.

"Oh, that ain't the half of it, " Andrew put his hands behind his head. "It is

called the punishment program for a reason. After about an hour, Happy will find

himself in the daycare section."

"DAYCARE SECTION?" the others yelped.

"Yeah, think of trying take care of sixteen little Taros."

"You mean?" Tenchi ventured.

Andrew turned to face them. "Yup, she patterned the babies after your cousin,

Tenchi. But if he screws up even once, he gets stuck with the two and three year

olds, which is worse! You against twenty-four little pinching, demanding

monsters."

"Remind me never to get Glyph mad at me," Bryan muttered.

Andrew smiled, "Oh, don't worry about that, you'd have to FUBAR something REALLY

bad before she gets that mad at you." He put his arms down. "Speaking of which,

how are we going to get back at Urd, anyway? For our idea have to work, we have

to know which room is hers."

"Why not also get back at Washuu, also?" another voice piped up, Shinji. "I mean

she captured you Tenchi."

"But she always does that," Bryan interjected. The guys agreed, but then... "Why

can't we just get the ones causing trouble without getting the girls that

aren't?"

"I suppose we'd have to talk with Ukyo. She'd know who was bunking with who."

Ryoga interjected. "She'd definitely won't be cooperative."

Andrew rubbed his head, wincing. "Don't remind me."

 

Ranma followed at the end of her group. She was trying to find a spot where she

could break and get something to eat. Even as a girl, her metabolism was high,

so she had to eat constantly for the energy.

"Hey, Ryoko, can we take a bre--!" she didn't finish her sentence as a blanket

descended over her head. She had sensed something behind her, but it didn't feel

like her sense of danger, just weirdness.

"MRph!????"

Ryoko and the other two paused. "Hey, Saotome, did you say something?" she

started to ask. But then they got nervous as they noticed the redheaded girl was

not behind them. "Ranma?" Ryoko began again. The forms held still until there

was silence in the hall.

 

The girl struggled within the blanket. "Hey, Ukyo calm down, we need to talk to

you." The forms around her whispered.

Ranma jerked. "Whoff, are..." she felt the blanket jerked back. She began to

punch.

"Katch shoo, amuu, goori, fen!" the guys heard on the outside.

Ranma stopped, overhearing, "Whoops! I know Ukyo doesn't know that technique!"

"We grabbed the wrong one," she recognized Bryan's voice.

Andrew's then piped up, "Wait, this might not be a bad thing."

Now Ranma's curiosity was piqued. The one who had said "Whoops" muttered,  "I'll

go get the hot water." She now recognized the voice as Ryoga's.

"No way man, Vegeta, you go get the hot water. Ryoga, help me flick the signal

to Cypher to loosen up."

The flicker happened and the blanket dissolved into a gold mass. Ranma-chan

found her head clear.

Then it occurred to her to scream.

"AHHHMphhhftttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt!"

Andrew, Bryan, Ryoga, and Zechs abruptly put their hands over her mouth. "Shh,

we need to know something. Do you know where Urd is staying?"

"Hi da ya wanna no?"

Bryan loosened his hold. "Let go, guys. Can we try that again?"

"Why do you wanna know?"

"Between her invading our bathroom privacy," Andrew started.

"Or tying me up in knots," Bryan added.

"She has been making a nuisance of herself," Andrew finished.

"So what did you have in mind?" Ranma asked.

"Ever see 'Revenge of the Nerds'?" Bryan asked.

"Wait, you're not planning to...with a camera...?"

            "NO!" Bryan fumed, then pulled out a bottle, "I was thinking more along

the lines of Liquid Heat."

 

" 'More than meets the eye?' I've heard that somewhere before," Akane said.

"Oh, that's from Transformers," Sasami said, smiling, "And we all know who the

Transformer is, right?"

"Hmmm. REBB won't be as easy to catch as the other stuff," Rei said, "Perhaps we

should visit Washuu for some help on this one."

 

"I'll catch up with you guys in a bit," Asuka told her group, "After that run in

with that perverse mensch, I need to take a dip to cleanse myself."

"I understand whole-heartedly," Ryoko said, "I might need a shower myself."

"I'm just glad he didn't grope ME!" Skuld said.

"He's sick, kiddo, but not THAT sick," Ranma said, returning.

Ryoko tilted her head. "Where had you disappeared to?"

"You don't wanna know."

 

She'd informed the others of the location of Urd's quarters, and warned them to

be careful, since Urd was sharing a room with her sister Belldandy.

 

Glyph was sitting down on the bridge, cradling a cup of coffee in her hands,

about to get into a really good book, when the entire ship rocked. The coffee

cup fell and shattered. Alarm klaxons blared.

"That was weapon fire!" Glyph yelped, "Zod, what's going on?"

"A vessel operating under cloak just fired a warning across our bow," Zod

informed her, "Ship is decloaking now. Class and ID confirmed. The ship is the

Queen Emeraldas. We're being hailed."

The image of Space Pirate Emeraldas came up on the screen, "Where is the Saiya-

jin called Vegeta?"

 

Upon feeling the effect of an energy weapon, Bryan had immediately plugged them

into a terminal, and he now turned to face Vegeta.

"What did you do this time?"

"The last time we stopped at a space bar, I met her, and I was rather impressed

by her, so I made a traditional Saiya-jin show of respect."

"Meaning?" Andrew prompted.

"I told her I'd show her my scars if she'd show me hers. How was I supposed to

know she'd take it the wrong way?"

Bryan banged his head into the bulkhead, "Why did I put you on my crew? Why?

Why? Why?"

Andrew shrugged, "Temporary insanity?" but his smile gave the impression that he

didn't know either.

"It could be worse," Zechs pointed out, "She could realize that Ryoko is on the

ship as well. Remember, Ryoko beat her to that really big shipment last time."

"See, this is what I get for harboring known felons," Bryan said to Andrew.

Andrew shrugged, "Heck, Cypher is gonna get us all killed with his lack of

social graces one day."

"So I made a few mistakes," Cypher said, whining. REBB, Bryan, and Andrew all

glared at him. He stopped. "Okay, so a few dozen, but I'm still learning!"

"Anyway, to avoid trouble, let's treat these clothes with the Liquid Heat, and

get the heck out of here!"

 

Emeraldas strode onto the bridge of the Brian Drummond, her cape fluttering

behind her, her long red hair flowing freely. She was met by Glyph and Ryoko. No

sooner did Emeraldas enter the room than she spied the rival space pirate.

"Ryoko," Emeraldas smiled a smile that made even Ryoko cringe a bit, "long time

no see."

"eek."

"Listen, I'm telling you Prince Vegeta isn't here right now," Glyph said, "He's

on my ship, and I don't have a clue where those guys have taken it. They could

be on Risa for all I know. Plus, your shock cannons destroyed my coffee before I

could have any!" It made her a little mad.

Princess Ayeka and her group chose that moment to come onto the bridge.

"Miss Glyph, what was that shaking, a moment ago?"

Belldandy walked over to Emeraldas and introduced herself in a charming and

polite manner.

"Is there anything I can do to help you?"

"I'm looking for the rat Saiya-jin Prince Vegeta."

"Let me guess," Ukyo smiled, "He made a pass at you."

"That? That I don't mind. No, the lousy runt cheated at cards, and he owes me

money."

 

Bryan discovered the empty coffee pot in his lab, and a great fear began to well

up inside him.

"This could be trouble, guys."

"Why? You wanted a cup?"

"No. I prefer tea. But I was working on a special project that would make me a

rich man. Time-released coffee. One cup would hold all the caffeine that the

body needed for a day, released at controlled intervals, so that a person never

felt sleepy while they were working."

"So what's the problem?" Andrew asked, "Sounds like a great idea."

"Yeah, but it isn't perfected yet. See, I figured out how to get all that

caffeine into a single cup, but I haven't figured the time release formula yet.

Basically, a person who drinks this stuff will be wired for sixteen hours."

Washuu entered the lab at that moment, but she didn't look quite right. Her eyes

were open just a tad bit wider than usual, and she had a blank expression on her

face.

"Guess who had a cup," Andrew gulped.

"Guys," Cypher was backing away slowly, "I think now is the perfect time to get

the heck out of here."

The others made a hasty backpedaling in agreement.

 

"Hey, Urd," Asuka met the Megami in the hall, "Can I borrow one of your

swimsuits? I left all mine back at my house, and I wanted to take a dip in the

lake in the Arboretum."

"Be my guest," Urd said casually, and then, when Asuka was gone, "Ok, so we're

going to the JEDRI to catch a Transformer. Have we got the supplies we'll need?"

"Uhm, Urd," Akane was looking over the clue again, "This one is kinda blatant

about two sizes."

"Huh?" the rest of the group went.

 

Glyph sighed, finally reverting to a position of a quiet leader. Quiet in the

fact that she invited the other pirate to actually sitting with her for a rather

quiet drink of juice or tea. Belldandy smiled, even made a quick bite for the

both of them. Emeraldas gazed at her. Ryoko had made a very discreet exit.

"I guess there is no way to convince you of our sincerity," Glyph muttered.

Emeraldas gave a faint nod. "Apparently, since you harbor a rival, and tell of

acquaintances with the jerk that I wish to find, yes." The other pirate got up.

"But you are different, you are not afraid of the company you keep," Here the

woman paused, giving a very faint smile. She said simply, "I will keep a safe

distance for now."

Glyph smiled, tapping her head with a knuckle. "Yeah, I'm a real nutter for it,

but I enjoy their company. If you do find the guys, take it easy on Bryan,

Andrew and the rest of the group, okay?  Andrew and Bryan especially...They are

trying to keep the others in line..."

"BRYAN!" Emeraldas smiled thinly, "Is that scalawag around, too? He's an old

friend of my dear Tochiro."

 

Bryan and Andrew were finally walking together, seeing the others go their own

ways.

Then he noticed that spot Andrew had around his eye had disappeared. "Hey,

Andrew?"

"Hmm?"

"When Happosai threw that bomb, I noticed something..." he paused as Andrew

stiffened.

"My eye, right?"

Bryan shook his head.

"Damn," Andrew murmured. "I forgot Washuu's battle armor idea doesn't cover that

during a fight." He sighed, putting a hand near his face. "I guess I had better

drop the disguise then."

Bryan jumped slightly, making the Japanese hand sign for extreme surprise. "You

aren't gonna turn into some hideous monster, are you?" he squeaked.

"This is how I normally look."

Andrew had faced him. Bryan didn't see any real significant change. Then the

differences did show up. The hair was a twinge browner. And the dark mark that

covered his left eye. He was a little flabbier, but not by much.

"What is wrong with that?"

"Washuu does provide a little "cosmetic enhancement". I know that Glyph cares

for me the way I am, but here I can change the way I look. I'm happier, with

her, here."

Bryan sighed. It seemed that the pair did compliment each other, maybe there was

someone like that... but he smiled. He didn't need to think about that. Sailing

the stars was his dream, after all.

Andrew returned to his original looks, making his point.

"Now, let's find the others before Vegeta tries something else..."Bryan began.

"Or Cypher opens his mouth to someone else," Andrew finished Bryan's thought,

smiling.

 

Glyph was escorting Emeraldas back to her ship, when the loudest, most alarming

screech she had ever heard echoed through the ship. Emeraldas paused. Glyph had

winced, but turned and started running.

"Stay here, Captain!" she somehow managed to get her weapon out of the gauntlet-

"And I will get back here. Zod, where is Washuu?" she disappeared.

All Emeraldas thought on it was, "The Hell I will."

The space pirate followed, unholstering the Cosmo Dragoon, the legendary gun

built for her by Tochiro, one of only four, and a pistol without equal in the

universe.

 

Washuu was doing what she was supposed to, dealing with the fried of the panels

to the Drummond bridge. She grumbled, then dug under the section. "I thought

this was supposed to be a party..." she grumbled around a tool in her mouth.

Luckily, she was finding the parts quickly, and that extra little wiring from

Bryan's coffee seemed to be helping. If only she would get rid of that really

blank stare, and let the caffeine drain a moment.

Lain checked over her work as she went. All in all, between the two of them, Zod

seemed to notice that they were doing very well.

Suddenly, there was a very loud holler that made Washuu jump. She banged her

head on the inside of the panel.

"OW! Ow. Ow," she grumbled.

Lain turned her head.

            "Should we investigate?"

 

Asuka had started to relax in the water, when it felt like fire ants were

crawling on her skin.

Liquid Heat is used to ease the tension in sore muscles. It is diluted in water,

and then applied to the sore muscles. In this diluted state, it produces a

sensation of strong heat. Undiluted, Liquid Heat feels like the skin is being

cooked right off the bones. As the chemical began to seep out of the swimsuit

into Asuka's skin, the sensation was nothing short of her entire body being lit

ablaze.

Asuka let out the loudest scream that she had ever heard in her lifetime.

The only saving grace was that she was in a large pool of water. She peeled the

affected swimsuit from her, and began scrubbing at her flesh to remove the

offending chemicals. She breathed a sigh of relief, and slipped into the water

up to her chin.

The door to the Arboretum burst open.

"ASUKA!" Glyph came running in, "ARE YOU OK?"

"I'm fine...Now..."Asuka managed, "But what happened? Why did it burn all of a

sudden?"

Washuu, Belldandy, and Emeraldas burst into the room, "What's going on?"

"Somebody pulled a cheap prank," Asuka said, climbing out of the lake and

wrapping herself with a towel, "That swimsuit is a deathtrap."

"There's some sort of chemical residue," Washuu said, holding the bathing suit

out on the end of a twig, "Strong stuff."

"It was put there with bad intent," Belldandy said, "I can feel the aura of

vengeance upon it."

"This is Urd's suit," Asuka said, "Who'd want revenge against her?"

"I don't know," Belldandy said, "But it was a crude effort. A Megami would not

have been affected by the chemicals coating this garment."

Emeraldas holstered her weapon, "I smell a Saiya-jin rat. I think it's time you

told me what's really going on here."

 

Ukyo and her group were a little disappointed to move onto the next clue so

soon.  That meant that they had to get ahead on the others, because if Sasami's

group got the next one, they would be all even.

But they weren't getting the clue... and Belldandy and Lain had been called away

by Glyph for some reason. Glyph had told them that they wouldn't be penalized

for the others being needed. She had even given a small clue, "They are on the

Jedri," she had said. She was heading to the doorway with Ayeka. They finally

agreed that they would look for the clue separately. Ukyo looked at her wrist

where she had written it down.

"Small size. Hmm, Didn't REBB start collecting something that look like..."

 

Back on the JEDRI, REBB was admiring his collection of Transformers. Toys to any

of us, they were icons of his ancestry to him, much like the African shrines.

His favorite was Optimus Prime. He had worked long and hard to find an original

Optimus, and it was the gem of his collection. And there was Bumblebee, and

Prowl, and Starscream, and Megatron, and Grimlock, and Ultra Magnus, and then he

looked over at the Beast Wars section, the lineage closest to him. REBB was

technically a glitch, two Beasts in one robot. But his resemblance to an ancient

Gryphon was so stunning, that few doubted that he was made that way on purpose,

or by a sentient force within a computer. He had been mutated from his surface

structure, but somehow still maintained his both halves.

Tenchi sat near, smiling as he played with both Fuzzy and a Ryo-Oki crystal. He

laughed, then rolled over to let the fuzzy creature sniff at his face. She

pucked and purred in enjoyment.

REBB smiled, and picked up an orange peel. Everyone on the JEDRI had some on

hand, grounded or ungrounded.

"Hey, Tenchi, hold this up in front of Fuzzy, she'll be your friend for life,"

REBB laughed.

Tenchi looked at him puzzled, but took the peelings. He had to sit up. Then

found he had to fend off the cat-like advances. Fuzzy pucked, placing her human-

like paws on his face.  Then she was up on his head, surprisingly light. Tenchi

laughed.

"She sure likes those," he smiled, finally opening his hand.

 

Bryan sighed, after dealing with Urd the guys were taking a breather. Andrew was

suddenly talking to  his combadge.

"Whoa, Glyph, slow down...You're starting to sound like the Micro-machines Man

tied in with Yosemite Sam." Andrew then pulled the clip-on off and held it at

arm's length. Glyph could definitely be heard. "Yip! Hey, that ain't

ladylike...Okay, you don't have to call me that, and I don't sound like your

mother, even if you...oh! you mean Vegeta."

Bryan titled his head. He groaned. "Bryan, I hear you...I told you two to keep

an eye on those idiots!" Glyph snapped.

"B-but..."

"We could say the same for you, though Glyph," Andrew interjected. She gave him

a  verbal dark look. Andrew blushed, then backpedaled, "Or could have restricted

their access to this ship, you know." She apparently didn't ease her gaze. Bryan

definitely saw the sweatdrop starting to form behind Andrew's head.

"We'll talk on this later," she growled. " One, Vegeta is in deep with our

visitor. He seems to owe her a great deal of money. And, I'm letting you guys

know that SOMEONE had targeted Urd with a prank."

Bryan tried to hide his smile.

"Really?" Andrew sighed, also trying to keep a smile off his face.

"It missed.  I admit that Urd needs taken down a peg, I'd do it myself if she

got me riled enough. Asuka is now a little red, like a sunburn around...well,

nevermind. As soon as I find out who ..."

Both Andrew and Bryan winced. "We'll warn the guys. I am sorry that we don't

know who did it..." here Bryan trailed off. He may have had a good poker face,

but he didn't plan to use it.

Andrew signed off, putting a hand up to his hair. "If that don't come close...

she don't normally swear that much. This better be worth it..."

Bryan patted him on the back. "But she did tell us that we missed..."

Then they both turned rather mischievous glances on each other. "What's plan B?"

they said together.

 

Cypher picked up his guitar, strumming the chord. He tapped the surface to get

his beat, then started to play. Ryoga and Pathos looked up and listened.  They

began to sing a couple lines of "Wonderful". Ryoga smiled, but it wasn't one of

false emotion, only a twinge of sadness.

"How can you smile with all those tears in your eyes? Please don't tell me

everything is wonderful now."

"That one sure describes me, don't it?" he muttered, very low; the other two

didn't hear him. But he then returned to reading and laughing. They had Pathos's

and plenty of Glyph's collections of comic books and graphic novels. Pathos was

eating his favorite fish snacks. Ryoga had a tea, and some potato chips. Some of

the Ryo-Oki crystals, once they found that the boys did not mind them, hung

around.

"Now that's HOT sauce!" Ryoga giggled, showing Pathos the Frank Cho panel.

"Look like Tendo-san, REBB...ah, poof."

Ryoga laughed. Cypher paused in playing, holding the strings to stop the

vibration.

Then as if sensing something, he turned. Ryoko's head popped through the wall.

The guys stared at her in a strange way, if fact, Ryoga looked very nervous. She

acted like she was looking for something.

"Hey, you guys wouldn't happen to know what..." she materialized the rest of the

way through the wall. "...what this clue might mean?"

Cypher sighed, noticing that Ryoga was almost a white sheet (-_-'). "Here, looks

like I'm the one you should be asking."

He looked over the paper, sighed, then gave a faint smile. "It's REBB the one

you should be asking on that one. If he isn't the clue..."

He winked to the other two. Ryoko gave a snort of annoyance. "You sure?" she

asked.

"Yeah."

She looked over to the other two. Pathos smiled his "I'm just a cute kitty,

ain't I totally dumb?" expression. Ryoga still had his sweatdrop, saying

nothing. Pathos nudged him, and Ryoga dropped his gaze to the book. "Ooo, ouch!

Oscar got one on Truman, going through the pet door!" he winced.

Ryoko sighed, she wasn't going to get any answers here.

When the space pirate left, Cypher finally made an unfinished smile. "Lack of

social graces, my ass," he grinned. "Now, what..."

He noticed his combadge was making a sound. Pathos looked puzzled, flattening

his ears.

"Cypher, here, whatya want where?"

Then they all heard bluntly from Bryan, "We missed. Meet outside theater."

They all stared as the combadge message ended. Then as one...

"We MISSED????"

 

Tenchi banged on the door. He had needed to use the restroom, but somehow the

door had locked on him!  He pulled. "What the...!" he started. "Hey, REBB, this

isn't funny!"

But then he noticed the scuffling sound.  What was going on? Tenchi tried the

door again, this time pounding on it. "Let me out!" he hollered.

This time, it grew very quiet.

"Tenchi, are you okay?" a female voice asked. Shara! Tenchi realized it was she.

"Door's locked, can you?"

            Shara responded. "No, but I can get someone...Shinji is the closest. Hold

on."

 

                Shinji was tuning his cello when Shara called him, "Hey, Shin-

chan, need a favor, cutey."

               "Um...sure."

            "Tenchi got locked in the men's room. Be a dear and let him out, will ya?"

            Shinji sighed, "It's always something around here, isn't it?"

 

            Urd had no doubts about who it was that had targeted her. However, she

preferred to keep this a private matter, and so when asked by Glyph and the

others, she denied any knowledge of what was going on, stating that it had

probably been the amateurish prank of a juvenile mind. Without evidence to the

contrary, Glyph was forced to take the Megami at her word.

            Urd, however, had no intention of letting the would-be malefactors slide.

            She popped out of a viewer in the JEDRI, right in front of a very baffled

Shinji Ikari.

            "What's going on?" he asked.

            "Oh, Shinji," Urd put her arms on his shoulders, "I was wondering if you

would do a teeny weeny little favor for me."

            "I'm kinda busy," Shinji said, "Tenchi is locked in the bathroom, and I

gotta go open the door for him."

            "Oh, he can wait," Urd said in a huff, "Your dear friend Asuka is lying in

sick bay from the results of a mean prank pulled by someone on this ship, and

seeing as how your her friend, I think you should go over there and apologize to

her, right now."

            "Yeah, but who'll let Tenchi out. I gotta go."

            "You don't understand," Urd said, grinning, "It wasn't a request."

            She grabbed Shinji's arm and began to teleport through the viewer...

 

            Bryan looked over the crew that was gathered before him. He turned on

Vegeta.

            "You first. What is this about you owing Emeraldas money?"

            "I don't know," Vegeta protested, crossing his arms, "I beat her at a game

of cards, but that was fair and square."

            "Emeraldas isn't a sore loser, Vegeta," Bryan said, looking the Saiya-jin

in the eye, "If she feels she was cheated, there must be some reason."

            "And I'm a guy who destroys planets, wipes out civilizations, and kicks my

foes when they're down for sheer amusement, but I am not the sort to cheat at

cards. That's penny ante stuff to a guy like me."

            Andrew shrugged, "It's twisted logic, but it's logic. Call me crazy, but I

believe him. I mean, *I* beat him fairly easy yesterday."

            Bryan frowned, "I believe him too, and that doesn't help. I know

Emeraldas. She's neither a liar nor a poor sport. She wouldn't accuse someone of

cheating unless she had absolute proof that they were guilty. But even more

pressing is this business with Urd. But first, has anyone seen Shinji or

Tenchi?"

 

            Asuka was talking with the Kasumi EMH, who handed her a bottle of Aloe

Vera, "Just apply a little of this to the sore areas, and it should take the

burning down."

            "Thanks," She was about to walk into the bathroom to treat the Liquid Heat

soreness, when Shinji fell out of one of the diagnostic monitors on top of her.

            "What hit me?" He asked.

            "I will if you don't get off of me by the count of three," Asuka muttered,

and then in German, "Dunkopf."

 

            Lain was still working on the diagnostic programs, and she didn't see a

small, furry, six-legged thing creeping into the panel that Washuu had left open

when she'd dashed off to see what all the screaming was about. The panel was a

direct link terminal to the warp core of the Drummond, and the bug began to work

it's way towards the engine room.

 

            Bryan decided to deal with one crisis at a time, so he returned to the

Drummond to talk to Emeraldas.

            "Look, I know Vegeta is a rat and a louse," Bryan told her, staring out of

the window of the observation deck, "But he's not a liar. If he tells me he

didn't cheat, I have to believe him. But by the same token, I know that you

don't make accusations without merit, so I have to believe that something is

going on here."

            Emeraldas nodded, "It would seem so."

            Glyph smirked, "Well, at least we can all agree on that."

            "Would it settle the score, for now, if I paid the debt to you, and we got

to the bottom of this later?"

            Emeraldas considered it for a moment, "Very well. Tochiro thought of you

as a man he could trust, and so will I. However, tell Ryoko that the next time

she raids a ship that I'm after, we are going to have a long talk about her

manners."

            "She won't be raiding any more ships," Bryan smiled, "Zod will settle the

account, and I have a bottle of wine in the galley that you're more than welcome

to. Stick around with the girls, if you like. They wouldn't mind hearing about

some of your exploits, I'm sure. Besides, tomorrow we're going to celebrate

Startica, and I wouldn't mind at all if you joined us. Call up Harlock and tell

him he's welcome to come as well."

            Emeradas nodded, "By the way, I noticed that you have a copy of the Cosmo

Dragoon in your armory. How did you come by it?"

            "It's just a facsimile, a non-working model. I thought it might be nice to

have an homage to the greatest tinkerer I ever knew."

 

            Urd visited the mess hall of the JEDRI, and found what she was looking

for, a very special blend of alcohol made by REBB. She quickly poured the

contents of the bottle into a pitcher of root beer that had been set in the

fridge. The boys wanted to play dirty, that was just fine with her. They were

about to get a taste of their own medicine.

 

            Ukyo was approaching REBB's room. So far, so good. No sign of the guys.

Then she saw Sasami, Akane, and Rei coming out of the room.

            "I wonder where Urd went, all of a sudden," Sasami puzzled, "Oh, thanks

for loaning these to us, REBB. We'll get them back to you in no time."

            They were carrying several Transformers with them, and heading for the

gate.

            "They beat us!" Ukyo sighed. She peered into REBB's room, and saw the huge

robot near tears.

            "How could I say no to that cute little face?" he wept.

            "Oh, grow up!" Ukyo gave a snort. REBB stopped, and looked at her. Finally

she broke into a smile... "Got any extras of them? I promise to return them in

one piece."

REBB smiled as well. But then he knew how that big spatula felt...

             Well, the score was now one all.

 

            The next clue was passed around as all the girls assembled in the theater

of the Drummond. Asuka was feeling much better, Urd had resurfaced, and Lain had

finished running diagnostics on the damaged portions of Zod's memory banks.

            "Here ya go," Washuu said with cheer and gusto. The others wondered about

the strange, almost glazed expression on her face.

 

The clue read:

 

"This human storm is worth a bit of money

When you first see him you think him quite funny

But just when you think that it's all in fun,

He might just reveal his hidden gun."

 

            Rei shrugged, "You've got me."

            "Library?"

            "Oh, not that again!" Akane protested.

            "Why not just look at Bryan's tapes, instead?" Sasami suggested, "I mean,

what we're looking for is bound to be there."

 

            Ranma thought for a minute, "Hmmm. Give me a minute. I think I know this

one."

            Ryoko smirked, "I'm glad someone does. I need to start watching stuff

other than soap operas."

            "Well," Skuld said, "I figured out how Lain did it last time, and I can

pull the same trick."

            "YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE NEAR THAT COMPUTER AGAIN!" Washuu yelled at Skuld.

            "Well, so much for that," Asuka muttered.

 

            "Anyone know this one?" Ukyo asked.

            "I'm sorry, no," Ayeka sighed, "I need to start watching more than just

soap operas."

            "Hmmm," Belldandy thought, "If it's a gun, should we try the armory

first?"

            "It sounds like a show I saw recently," Lain said, "Tri...something."

 

            Aboard the JEDRI, Bryan stopped in the mess hall to get a drink. He met

REBB in there, as it was nearly lunch, and the Cybertronian was getting hungry.

They both poured glasses of root beer.

            "I found Tenchi," REBB said, "But there's still no sign of Shinji."

            He took a sip. The alcohol didn't affect him, and he couldn't taste it.

But chemical analyzers in his body identified it immediately. He called out a

warning.

            "BRYAN, DON'T!!!!"

            It was too late. Bryan had drank down the spiked soda, and without so much

as a word, he fell flat on his face.

            Zechs and Vegeta came into the room. They recognized the swan dive.

            "Our fearless leader never could hold his liquor," Vegeta said, and Zechs

nodded his agreement.

            "Then, man o' man, I do NOT envy him the headache he's gonna feel," REBB

said.

            Vegeta drank down a glass, "Hmm. Not bad."

            REBB's eyes popped, "H-how did you just handle that stuff."

            "What? This stuff? I've had Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters with more kick,

and those are really mild drinks."

            Zechs and REBB exchanged glances, "Figures."

            Vegeta started pouring the mixture down the sink as Cypher and his two

comrades came up.

            "What wrong him?" Pathos asked, pointing to Bryan.

            Vegeta explained about the root beer.

            Ryoga gave a faint smile, "One word, OUCH! I think Urd has figured that we

want to get her back."

            "Hey, was Shinji with you guys?" REBB asked.

            The trio looked to each other, then to the Cybertronian. "No."

            "Ut oh."

 

            Ukyo had no real idea, because usually when the usual Anime shows were on,

she was either working in the okonomiyaki shop, or trying to study to finish her

classes. So TV was not on her agenda often. But since she now knew Washuu, and

the ability for the young woman to make a double of a person, if in emergencies,

she now had a little more free time on her hands.

            For fun like this...but now she was trying to keep her nerves from being

tested by Ayeka. The princess sure lorded that she was over anybody.

            "Tri-hmm-," Ukyo sounded out.

            Would it be something Bryan would know?

            Come to think of it...all the clues were things that belonged either to

the JEDRI crew, or to Bryan. And she'd seen something in Bryan's room with the

word Trigun written on it. It was an action figure on a white blister card...Of

a man in a red coat with a big gun! But Sasami's group was heading there now, to

watch Bryan's videos! If they saw it...

            "Belldandy, I need you to use the mirrors!"

 

            A new puzzle. Ryoko began to scan through the JEDRI computer system. Shara

held her computer-ese tongue in the sense of knowing that Ryoko carried quite a

punch. The others were behind her.

            "Nope," she shrugged. "Either Glyph or the others don't know of it...or

just didn't bother putting it in their computer."

 

            Bryan felt really good, and really sick at the same time. Pathos leaned

over, putting a towel over his eyes.

            "Hangover?" he asked, almost purring.

                Bryan looked thoughtful for a moment, then a cheery grin

plastered itself on his face, "Nopers. Shtill drunk. Hangoversh for later."

            "You okay, man?" Andrew asked.

            "Jusht a little dain bramage," Bryan stumbled to his feet, "Nothing I

can't handle. Jusht shtop shpinning the room, would ya?"

            "Miya!" Ryo-Oki looked at him sympathetically.

            "You know shomething? You are a wonderful (hic) human being," Bryan

slurred to the cabbit.

            "I'm going over to the Drummond," Vegeta said, "I'll see if maybe Shinji's

over there. And I'll find out what the deal is with Emeraldas. You guys keep him

in line."

            They turned to find Bryan, but he was gone.

 

            "Hey, Happy!" Bryan cried delightedly, opening the door to the

holotheater, "How ya been, man!"

            Happosai was not doing so well. He looked like he'd been through World War

III and back.

            "They pinched me so hard," he wailed, falling on his knees.

            "Aw buck up, pal," Bryan lurched over to him, "You're free now."

            "Why so I am," Happosai said, "Well, thank you, Bryan, m'boy! I'm off to

go talk to some of those cuties on..."

            Bryan snagged Happosai by the collar, "Nah. You doan wanna do that. I got

a better idea."

            He dragged Happosai off to the bridge with him.

 

 

            Vegeta walked along the corridors of the Brian Drummond. He'd locked onto

Shinji's ki, and was marching along to see what the boy was doing on this ship.

His senses lead him to the galley, where he saw Shinji in an apron, working over

the counter.

            "What are you doing?" Vegeta asked.

            "Well, the girls are all busy with their treasure hunt," Shinji said,

smearing peanut butter across several pieces of bread, "So I'm fixing their

lunch for them."

            "Great. We're worried sick about where you went, and you're playing

Wolfgang Puck on another ship."

            "Big words for such a small man," Emeraldas said, walking up behind

Vegeta. Glyph was with her. It had been seven hours since breakfast, and

everyone was getting a bit hungry, so she'd come to check on the progress of the

meal.

            Vegeta turned and smiled at the space pirate, "I hear you've been looking

for me."

 

 

            Andrew and the others stopped at the infirmary, where Andrew pulled a

small syringe out of the emergency cabinet.

            "What's that?" Ryoga asked.

            "It's a chemical Washuu made for us after Glyph accidentally got a dose of

REBB's concoction. It breaks down alcohol in the bloodstream muy pronto."

            "Any side-effects?" Zechs asked.

            "Well, you go through a complete hangover in just under a minute, so you

have the most intense headache of your life for that time."

 

            On the bridge of the JEDRI, a very drunk Bryan was getting the group in

even worse trouble.

            "That's what I said. This guy here is the Master of the Founding School of

Anything Goes Martial Arts! We're challenging you to a match! So send your

strongest guy and let's see what he's got!"

            The Predators on the screen did not look amused. The fact that they never

looked amused didn't help the situation any. Happosai was trying desperately to

get off the bridge, but he was run over as the doors opened and Andrew, Ryoga,

and Tenchi burst in. Ryoga and Tenchi grabbed Bryan, and Andrew injected him

with the anti-alcohol.

            There came an intense groan as the Drummond's master clutched at his

suddenly aching head. The group turned as REBB grabbed Happosai and looked at

the screen.

            "Bryan, you are soooo dead," Andrew winced, following REBB's gaze.

            "Man, I sure feel like it. What was that?" Bryan looked a little pale, but

he sounded better, "And where am I?"

            "Nevermind," REBB growled.

            The Predators noticed REBB for sure. "One from the planet of

untouchables..."

            "Oh shit."

            "Your comrade seems to have challenged us to a match," the Predator calmly

responded.

            "Uh heh, oh boy," Andrew squeaked. "We are dead."

            REBB took the floor, or rather the comlink. "Well, our friend here was a

little drunk--," And in noticing Bryan's glare. "Make that a LOT drunk," REBB

answered in response to that glare.

            "It would be against your honor not to accept then...untouchable,"

            Tenchi looked puzzled. "What are you meaning by 'untouchable'?"

            For a moment, REBB grew silent. He was searching his internal databank for

the information. He had downloaded many of the memories of his planet. It had

started out as the most unusual case of schizophrenia that anyone had ever

recorded. He within a millisecond had his information...

            "From what I can recall, they tried to take over Cybertron when the

Decepticons were in rule...uhm, let's see. It would probably be like going into

the roughest, gang-infested part of New York City with only a sword, you aren't

that good, and proclaiming you're taking over the neighborhood."

            Andrew whistled, and Bryan winced. Ryoga looked thoughtful though, "From

what I remember of New York...that's kinda...dumb." Ryoga paused for empathesis.

            "Bingo!" REBB smiled. "And when they finally found the PIECES of their

comrades..."

            "We declared the planet untouchable," the speaker responded.

            "Look, pal, we're just hanging out...we didn't mean to offend, or

anything. We are planning to leave the area, and leave you guys alone."

            Little did the guys know that they were already targeted...and the

Predators were on board. Shara grew very worried.

            "Uhm, Andrew," she spoke up. "I think that idea is a leeeeeeeetle late."

 

            Belldandy and Ukyo fell through the mirror into the room. Ukyo

straightened, then glanced quickly around the room. Now where was it? Where was

it? Then she saw the figure, snatched it up, and signaled to Belldandy... and

they both left.

Just as Sasami and her group came in.

 

Vegeta and Emeraldas stared at each other. "So Vegeta...care to explain

yourself?" Emeraldas spoke calmly. They seemed like a pair of bristling cats.

"Emeraldas, you and I have played many poker games. This is the first time you

accuse me of cheating..." Vegeta growled back.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Glyph shook her hands in trying to get their attention.

"You've guys played each other before?"

They both turned on her. "Yes."

"Hmm, hold it," Glyph held one hand up. "Since you have played Vegeta before,

has he ever cheated before now?"

"I don't cheat!" he growled.

"Veg, shut up!"

Emeraldas leaned over him. "You have a point..." suddenly she trailed off. Then

she put her hand up next to Vegeta. Then she raised it to a little above Glyph's

height. For once, she looked puzzled.

By now the other two, stared. "Captain, what are you doing?"

"This will sound very odd, but for some reason, I remember that you were taller

somehow..."

Vegeta looked indignant. "Lady, my HEIGHT isn't something I can change!"

Glyph paused, thinking, "Well, there is..." They both turned to her.

"Either you started wearing platform shoes," here she noticed Vegeta's growling

stare. "Or we got someone impersonating you..."

Then both of them looked at her very solemn.

"Vegeta, please wait in the Bryan's briefing room until I come for you, okay? Captain, do you have some type of recording camera aboard your ship?"

 

Glyph shook her head. She told Emeraldas that she would need something from the

JEDRI and would be right back. But most of it was to get rid of the headache she

was getting. This was supposed to be fun...but she hadn't planned on all the

unexpected people, or the prank war, or the...

She neared the gateway when she gained a sensation that she should quickly move

to the side.

She always followed that sort of thought.

All the guys were running out of the gate, very panicked. And the mass Exodus

was heading her way!

"Get outta the way, Glyph!" Ryoga yelled. She stared as the group jogged by

her...

And then saw the group of Predators right after them.

 

Glyph snapped!

 

"ALL OF YOU! STOP!"

There were a multiple set of feet that screeched to a halt, in total surprise.

Glyph seemed to be glowing in her own version of battle aura, rainbow colored

and very hot.

"LEADERS, HERE, NOW!" she pointed to in front of herself. She had pulled her

greatest weapon on them...the "voice-of-an-angry-mother" attack.

Andrew pulled Bryan with him. "Don't question it, just follow it...or it's gonna

hurt worse than you think."

The Predators were just as surprised, but the group's leader came forward. He

was a good foot taller than she was. She pointed with both hands to him. "LOOK,

I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU GOT AGAINST THEM, AND BRYAN, I DON'T CARE WHAT CAUSED THIS...I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT IT. I NEED SOME CAFFIENE, AND I AM IN PMS MODE, SO GET THIS OFF THIS SHIP! NOW!!!!!!!!!!" here she pointed back to the doorway.

The boys and the Predators quietly said "Yes'm," and jogged back through.

Bryan gasped in and out, catching his breath. "Is-is that what you meant by her

getting pissed?"

Andrew nodded, "Uh huh."

Tenchi gulped, "I thought Ryoko was bad..."

Then they remembered their problem, the Predators came back with them. But

instead of running, REBB stepped between them and the very alarmed guys.

"Okay, you want a match, how about a three-way? Neutral ground, three teams. We

pick teams. We choose ground."

Bryan pulled suddenly down on REBB's head. "Are you TRYING to fuckin' kill us?"

"Trust me."

"Doesn't that mean 'screw you' in LA?" Andrew asked, then sheepishly grinned as

he saw the others glare at him.

            "Accepted," the Predator leader answered.

 

            Bryan wondered if he really should have wrung REBB's cybertronian neck.

Although they had gone through the JEDRI store of weapons, (Many of which were

from REBB's own collection, recreated, and in working order.) they had chosen a

deserted planet. Rocks lined for miles, but in case of trouble, they didn't want

civilians involved.

            Andrew took a long swig of water from a canteen.

            "Damnit! Something's wrong on my ship. I should be capable of reproducing

the powers of all those on the Drummond right now!"

            ##Peachy## Mew looked a bit irritated.

            "How in the world do you work this thing?" he yelped to REBB over his

combadge. "I don't want to end up like Marvin the Martian with this molecular

degenerator."

            "At least, you don't have something this small..." Ryoga growled, "Besides

I'm a martial artist, why would I need THIS for?" he pointed the little weapon

forward. "I'm gonna break the damn thing!"

            "Haven't you ever seen Men In Black? That's a Noisy Cricket. AND WATCH

WHERE YOU POINT THAT, WILL YOU!" Andrew blurted, as turned Ryoga's arm.

            "No, I didn't. I'm still gonna break the damn thing..."

            Mew held up his sign. ## Where are they then? ##

            Then the boys grew quiet.

 

            Zechs and Tenchi both held swords. REBB somehow had gotten a good copy of

a sword of light, and Tenchi had his ready.  Cypher held a Phaser rifle. He had

tensed himself further, body almost into steel. They waited for the Predator's

attack.

 

            REBB had only Happosai as his partner, but somehow he seemed confident.

Happy...just looked like he was with the most insane creature he had ever met.

 

            One of the Predators closed in on Bryan from behind. It was sad, really,

how easy it was to get the drop on him, the Predator felt. It was almost a waste

of time to shoot him. Still, this one had invited it on himself, and he was

getting exactly what he'd asked for. The Predator took aim with its pulse

cannon, and fired. The energy shot passed right through Bryan...and the boy

vanished as if he'd never been there. The Predator heard a gun cock beside his

head.

            "Holo projectors are wonderful things," Bryan said, smiling, "One would

think that a race of stalkers like yours would be wise to bait. I'm surprised

you guys don't use that technique."

            The Predator suddenly became rather grainy looking, and then faded out of

sight.

            "Me and my big mouth," Bryan muttered, ducking as the energy blast struck

the ground where he'd been a moment ago.

 

            Suddenly, Ryoga and Andrew both tensed. That sense that a martial artist

has in relation to your opponent, kicked in.

            "Duck!" they split from each other. Andrew grabbed Mew, tucking the little

pokemon under his arm. He knew that didn't go after a creature that didn't fit

the description of their prey, but he didn't want to take chances. There were

four of them.

            Ryoga aimed his weapon...

            and suddenly found himself hitting a  large rock with his back.

            "Watch out for the recoil, Dammit!" Andrew hollered. "Get up, Hibiki!"

            "Now he tells me," Ryoga grumbled, then realized he had dropped his

weapon. He began to dig around in the sand, frantically.

            Bryan now fired, and dematerialized one. "Yes!" he crowed.

            "Don't get cocky!" Andrew added. He aimed with a steady shot, and

dematerialized another.

            Bryan noticed Ryoga, "LOOK OUT!" he yelled. The other Predator was almost

behind the boy.

            Ryoga, in not finding the Noisy Cricket, turned, and flung a bandanna. He

escaped, panting.

            But the Predators were getting smart to the weapons.

 

            REBB faced down two. He smiled.

 

            "We need to hit the both of them, NOW!" Andrew concluded after he told

them to fall back.

            Bryan gasped; the degenerator was running out of power. He looked up.

            He noticed that Mew and Ryoga were very close together. Suddenly, a very

ingenious idea threw itself into his head.

Bryan turned to Mew, "Use your Perish Song!"

Andrew looked at Bryan like he was crazy, "Perish song won't affect a Predator!"

"I didn't mean on him, I meant on Ryoga!"

Andrew got it in a hot second, "MEW, DO IT!"

Mew charged his Perish song, and hit Ryoga with it full force.  At first, Ryoga

reacted, puzzled, then began to develop tears. The melody seemed sad, but Bryan

began to reconsider as he looked at Ryoga.

Ryoga looked like the bottom had just dropped out of his world. In his mind's

eye, he saw Akane standing over him with Ranma, dumping a bucket of water on him

and laughing all the while.

"The world is a dark and lonely place..." Ryoga whispered.

"HIT THE DECK!" Andrew yelled to the others, "This one's gonna be BIG!"

"...and I am beyond care," Ryoga finished, shielding his face, but somehow

yelling towards the sky. "SHI SHI HOKKODAN!"

The Predators never knew what hit them.

 

The boys sighed a collective sigh, and then went to find the others.

 

REBB was holding off pretty good, when he saw the four coming towards Happy and

himself. The two Predators paused.

"I had been afraid to use this," REBB smirked. He held up a large, dark bundle.

He threw it. "Panty-bomb!"

"Panty?" Andrew started, wrinkling his nose.

"Bomb?" Bryan finished.

White objects fluttered over the two Predators, Ryoga now reacted in disgust.

Then it really got weird.

"Hey, Happy, they're stealing your silky darlings!" REBB called.

Now it was Ryoga who gave the warning, "Get outta his way!" he yelped.

Happy grew huge. Through his battle aura, he grew to the size of an apartment

building. "Those are MINE!" he roared.

The Predators stared as he grew. In their own language, they said something.

"Whoa, can't say that in polite company!" REBB smiled.

"Good thing we're the only ones here, huh?" Cypher smirked.

"Speak for yourself," Zechs said evenly.

There came a horrible sound of crunching bones, and then the two Predators were

laid out on the ground, obviously much worse for the wear.

"And don't ever do it again!" Happosai said simply.

 

Things were not peaches and cream aboard the Drummond, either, though nobody

knew it at that moment. Bryan had been quite right when he'd noticed his

inability to link to the powers of those on the ship. The relay system that

allowed him to do that had been trashed by the bug as it worked its way deeper

into the system, ever closer to the ship's warp core. The very nature of the bug

rendered it undetectable to the Drummond's instruments, and it proceeded without

obstacle.

 

Meanwhile, operating on the assumption that someone had impersonated Vegeta and

gotten him in dutch with Emeraldas, Glyph was looking for clues in the database

of the Drummond. Using the video records from the Queen Emeraldas, and the image

scanners of the Drummond, and a lot of technical support from Washuu, she had

isolated an energy signature on the monitor that was clearly not Vegeta's. That

was enough to get the Saiya-jin off the hook, though he seemed remarkably

unconcerned himself, but it wasn't enough for Glyph. She wanted to know who it

was, in case they posed a danger to her as well.

"I have a positive ID on the aura," Zod said, "I'm superimposing the image now."

Glyph watched as the image changed, and smiled wryly as she recognized the new

form that took shape.

"Him. I should have known."

"Indeed. Xelloss," Zod didn't sound surprised either, "Vegeta and he had a

disagreement on this ship once about the ownership of the last slice of pizza.

Vegeta's superior strength and speed afforded him the victory in the dispute.

Xelloss swore revenge, rather calmly I might add. And when Vegeta asked Xellos

what he though he could do..."

"Xelloss said that it 'was a secret,' right?"

"Indeed."

"God, I hate that phrase..." she muttered.

 

Sasami and Shinji were carrying plates out to the others.

"Thanks for helping in the kitchen, Shin-chan," Sasami beamed.

"No trouble," Shinji smiled, "I'd better get back to the others, before they eat

all the food over there."

"You're a very useful person," Ayeka commented, as Shinji finished setting the

table, "If you were a bit older, I might even find you attractive."

"HIM!?" Asuka almost choked on a sandwich, "You're kidding, right!"

"Not at all," Ayeka said calmly, "What about you, Miss Ryoko? What do you

think?"

"Well, he's not quite as strong, and he's got a squeaky voice, but he's

certainly as sweet as my darling Tenchi."

"Excuse me, Miss Ryoko, but I think you mean MY darling Tenchi."

Ranma giggled, "Here we go again."

Just then, the lights went out. A shot rang out, the maid screamed.

 

Oops, wrong story.

 

The girls yammered in surprise of the loss.

"We seem to have a problem with the main power grid," Rei commented.

"I'll take the blatantly obvious for $100, Alex," Skuld sniped. She pulled out

her mallet, "There's a bug here. I'm sure of it."

 

"Warning," Zod announced, "Engine core is rapidly destabilizing. Predict Core

Breach in Five minutes."

"Oh Great!" Glyph said, "I don't suppose there's an easy way to deal with this?"

"I'm sorry, no. The automatic circuits are down. Only a manual shutdown can be

effective at this point. The only remaining options are to either jettison the

core, or to separate the saucer section."

"Well, neither of those ideas worked too damn well on Generations or

Insurrection, Zod! Yeesh, one leaves us adrift in space in the saucer alone, and

the other leaves us adrift in space in a ship without a warp drive," she sighed,

beginning to wonder if she was just crazy, "OK, call Bryan. Boy, I hope he takes

this well."

 

Bryan took it rather well.

"Someone bring the smelling salts!" Cypher barked.

"Right here," Tenchi said.

As they revived him, Bryan looked at the screen, "Glyph, I want you and the

others to get to the saucer section and prepare to separate. I'm going to the

engine room to see if I can fix this."

"Do you want any help?" she offered.

 

The engine room of the Drummond was hot, and steam was beginning to pour out of

the core. Bryan ran up to the partition that had come down to separate the ship

from potentially harmful radiation, an automated response to any sort of leak on

the ship. He donned a pair of work gloves, and went to the safety door that

would permit him to enter the enclosed area.

Vegeta appeared in front of him, "Are you out of your freakin' mind!? No human

can tolerate the radiation that must be in there!"

"Aren't you the one who's always saying that I'm sub-human?"

"You're not going in there," Vegeta said more forcefully, putting his hand on

Bryan's shoulder.

Bryan sighed, "Perhaps you're right. What is Mister Scott's condition?"

"Well I don't think...Wait, we don't have a Scott!"

Too late, Bryan had slipped in while the Saiya-jin was distracted. He tore open

the engine component, and began to make the needed repairs.

 

"Time to detonation?" Glyph asked, trying not to sweat. She gritted her teeth to

keep her voice calm. Which was rapidly disappearing.

"Two minutes," Rei informed her.

"Time remaining before we can no longer safely separate?"

"Fifteen seconds ago."

Damn.

Just then, there was a chirping noise from the computer. Glyph about jumped out

of her skin, but then turned to the panel. The lights came back on!

"Glyph," Ryoko looked over the display, "The mains are back online."

"Good work, Bryan," Glyph called over the comm. There was no answer, "Bryan?"

Silence.

"Rei, take the comm," Glyph said, rushing to the turbolift. Ukyo, Lain, Skuld,

and Washuu went with her.

 

The danger of a core breach was now over, but Glyph wasn't receiving any news

from the engine room, and that worried her. She rushed in to find REBB, Vegeta,

and Cypher all there. The compartment with the warp core was sealed, and filled

with steam, making it impossible to see what was happening inside.

Glyph ran to open the compartment and let Bryan out.  She had a severe

adrenaline rush, panicked now over the other captain. REBB and Cypher held her

back. She shouted for them to let go.

"NO! You could flood the whole deck!"

"But he could be killed!"

"Glyph, if there's a radiation leak in there, then he's dead already," Vegeta

said, not looking at them.

Just then, Bryan stumbled out of the steam and pressed himself against the

transparency.

"Ship...out of danger?"

It took a moment to register in her shocked mind, but Glyph recognized the

quote, and quickly understood. Then she got mad. She gritted her teeth.

Just then, Zod spoke up, "Sensors are back online. The radiation levels are

normal."

Realizing that there was no danger of radiation, REBB and Cypher loosened their

grip on their leader. She opened the door, letting Bryan out.

"It's like a sauna in there!" He said, taking deep breaths. He didn't notice the

veins on Glyph's forehead rise a little.

WHAPANG! Ukyo nailed him with her spatula.

"You Jackass! You made us all worry about you!"

Bryan grinned, rubbing his head, "What say we call a truce in the prank war?"

"Deal," Glyph said, chuckling. She couldn't stay mad for long, after the relief.

And Ukyo had said it sooooo much better.

"Here, Skuld," Bryan pulled the bug out of his shirt, "I think you should deal

with this little troublemaker."

"Uh, Bryan, why did you put that down your shirt?" Ukyo grimaced, finally

smiling.

Glyph finally sighed. There were a few more bugs than she planned on, all right.

"Why didn't you take your shirt off and ball the bug into it?" she asked.

Bryan winced, "Ya know, I didn't think of that..."

 

Back on the JEDRI, all the others were looking at Bryan with a mixture of

respect and a sense that he just might be as crazy as he claimed.

"I was meaning to ask you something," Andrew said, as they sat to lunch, "Last

night, you muttered something about Hawkeye in your sleep, and I'm sure I know

what it was in reference to, but I'd like to make sure."

"It was M*A*S*H," Bryan said, "I grew up in a military family, so we watched it

a lot. My folks used to call me Radar, after a the character on the show."

Ryoga looked up. "But he was speaking to me. Why did you call me that anyway?"

"From a story Glyph found...I'll leave it at that," Andrew spoke up.

By then, Pathos gave a tug on Ryoga's bandanna. It was a little one, but it got

the other's attention.

"Pathos? Where have you been hiding?" Andrew asked. He took a bite of the

leftovers from the night before. The others were scrounging for food as well.

"I cat, know when hide. No like fight, rather sleep."

Mew giggled, then settled on the cat-boy's head. Ryoga smiled, halfway.

"So what are we going to do now?"

 

The new clue read like this:

 

This is the story of a Hare

Won with a crane on a bet

But just be fair,

He's with the musician, yet.

 

"Hare must be a name for something," Akane murmured.

 

Glyph called up Urd. This might be a way to proverbially kill two birds with one

stone. She told Emeraldas to meet her in the briefing room.

Vegeta had his feet on the console in front of him.

"Get off that," Glyph muttered. She hit his feet, then sat down, signaling for

them to do the same.

"Vegeta, do you remember an individual by the name of Xelloss?"

Vegeta gave a cross between groan and a snarl. "Yeah."

Urd seemed puzzled. What had she had to do with this?

"I have a plan, but I need your help, and we need to get it done before

tomorrow, before the Startica festival."

"What is the plan?"

 

Cypher picked up the comics and whatever had strewn about the room. He flipped a

stuffed animal onto the desk. Pathos had taken it off his shelf .

"Hmm, I can't remember what this critter was," he turned the Monster Rancher tag

over. "Oh, yeah, Hare...I gotta improve my handwriting."

 

"Another Jedri clue," Ukyo muttered, recognizing the musician part. "The

musician is Cypher. I hope he doesn't wanna do a 'trader dick'."

Ayeka looked at her, trying to understand her, "What's a 'trader dick'?"

"Something Glyph said about something REBB did with some of Washuu's

inventions...don't ask."

"I'm afraid to even inquire," Ayeka sighed. "So we must talk to Cypher."

 

Ryoko smirked, "Hare. That name sounds familiar for some reason."

Ranma yawned, "So, where the heck are we going, anyway?"

"The Arboretum. There's someone there I want to talk to."

The door to the Arboretum opened, and Asuka looked at Ryoko, "I don't remember

anyone being in here when I was."

"That's because he was probably napping."

"HE?!"

"Relax. He's not like a lot of guys. He wouldn't take any interest in a bathing

girl."

"Why? Is he..."

A gruff voice came out from a grove of trees, "No, and don't finish that

thought."

A blue and white wolf with horns on his head stepped out of the grove,

stretching,

"A dog?" Asuka asked.

"I'm not a dog!" Ryga of the Wind snapped.

His voice reached outside the Arboretum, where Sasami and her group had been

strolling. She recognized it immediately.

"RYGA!" Sasami came running in and hugged him, "I haven't seen you since I did

that one MST with you guys."

"How long are you gonna hide here, anyway?" Rei asked.

"Until Vegeta apologizes for all the singed fur."

Ryoko whispered in Ryga's ear, "I need to ask a question about an old friend of

yours..."

 

The guys were still chowing down, when there came a slight rumbling noise.

"That was the shields," REBB said, turning his head slightly.

Bryan was pulling a plate of pizza rolls out of the microwave, "Funny. Usually,

when something hits the shields, the whole ship shakes."

"Nah. Only if it's something really strong," Andrew said.

"Still," Tenchi said between mouthfuls of noodles, "We should look into it."

"Guys, we have guests," Shara said, "And they aren't friendly."

The screen in the mess hall came to life, and displayed the latest in what had

been a long string of unexpected events.

Bryan whirled on Cypher, "Why is an Imperial Star Destroyer pursuing this ship?"

"Believe it or not," Cypher said, "This one isn't my fault. This is Washuu's

doing!"

"Oh yeah," Andrew said, "I bet they're still sore about her saying their ships

looked like flying pizza slices. Or that remark she made about Vader..."

"They can't really hurt us," REBB said, "Their lasers are like mosquito bites to

our shields, and we're faster and more maneuverable. Their shields are like

tissue paper against our phasers, and they move like a drunken elephant."

"Still," Tenchi said, "I don't find it all that comforting that we're being shot

at, you know what I mean."

Just then, a proton torpedo launched from the Star Destroyer. It impacted on the

shields. There was a sudden arcing and sparking.

"AHHH!" Bryan yelled out, "Guys, we have a casualty!"

"Who'd they get?" REBB asked.

Bryan held up the smoldering remains, "The microwave!"

Andrew wiped his mouth with his napkin and stood up, "They've gone too far. Ok,

if they want a fight..."

 

Ukyo looked around, puzzled, "What's that rumbling?"

"Shall I check?" Lain asked.

"I'm sure it's just the guys acting up again," Ukyo said, shaking her head.

"Cypher is probably with them," Belldandy pointed out, "Perhaps we should

investigate before we walk in unannounced."

"I have a bad feeling about this," Ayeka said softly.

 

Andrew was sitting at the helm of the JEDRI. Bryan was holding a large bowl full

of chocolate chips, offering them to the others as he walked around. Cypher was

at the weapon controls. Shinji and Tenchi were both praying that the madness

would end. REBB was polishing his sword, with a demented grin on his face.

Pathos was hiding behind the command chair, because he found Darth Vader to be a

very frightening sight. (Hey, he's a cat, even if the phrase fraidy- comes

first.) Zechs was taking care of the communications console. Ryoga was doing

one-handed push-ups. Happosai was napping on the bulkhead.

"They want a fight, then we'll give them a fight," Andrew smirked, "We're going

right into their docking bay."

"Wait," Tenchi asked suddenly, "There must be a few thousand guys on that ship.

Are you proposing that we storm into the docking bay, fight our way to the

bridge, and commandeer the ship?"

"Actually," Andrew said, "We were just going to put a few smart bombs in their

sewage reclamation system, but I like your idea better Tenchi."

"Yeah, that's not a bad one," REBB said, "I haven't had a workout in so long."

"Well, we weren't doing anything else," Ryoga said thoughtfully, "So I'm all for

it."

Bryan shrugged, "After the Predators, what can a few hundred Stormtroopers do?

I'm all for it."

Shinji sighed, "You and your big mouth."

Tenchi shook his head miserably, "It's like having a conversation with Ryoko."

 

The JEDRI plunged through the defensive perimeter of the Star Destroyer, forcing

its way into the docking bay. A squad of Stormtroopers surrounded the main

hatch, waiting to pour electric death on anyone who tried to get past them. It

was unfortunate for them that the first one out was REBB01, who moved through

the hall like a quarterback, bowling over troops left and right.

 

"What is all that noise?" Ukyo demanded.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," Shara responded.

 

The guys were meeting no real challenges as they went through the Star

Destroyer. The average Stormtrooper was just no match for the rag tag assortment

of nuts and loonies that had boiled out of the invading ship. The fact that the

invaders had no idea which way they were going, was of no obstacle, either.

Whenever they came to a wall that was in their way, Ryoga would use his Bakusai

Tenketsu to clear a path for them. All was going well...until a dark and

menacing figure stood before them.

"H-he's here!?" Andrew gasped.

"Oh boy," was all Cypher could muster.

Darth Vader drew his lightsaber, "You have proven formidable thus far, but you

will go no farther."

Bryan drew his mimicry of Ryoko's sword, "I got dibs on the guy in the mask."

"You can have him," REBB said, "My armor is useless against that lightsaber."

Bryan crossed swords with Vader, "I got news for you, tall, dark and ugly. I'm

holding back my power. If I wanted to, I could blow up a planet with a cold

stare."

"I have no time to waste on fools like you," Vader said, "Either surrender or

die."

"I think I'll take the third option, and use my...Hey, I can't access Vegeta's

powers!"

"A problem on the Drummond?" Andrew asked.

"Shouldn't be. I should be able to use the powers of anyone on my ship!"

Vegeta came walking up, "Hi guys. What's going on?"

In sheer shock, Bryan's blade vanished, "Vegeta? What are you doing here?"

"Well, I needed to ask you a question, so I came over. Hi, Darth."

Vader turned off his lightsaber, and nodded slightly, "Vegeta."

"Whoa," Cypher looked confused, which for the changeling was a pretty good feat.

"You two know each other?"

"Sure," Vegeta said, "We met at the SuperVillain Conference on Tau Ceti last

year."

"It was an informative event," Vader reflected.

"Look, Darth," Vegeta looked around, "I know Bryan is a major pain in the

ass..."

"HEY!"

"But he's a pal of mine. So I'd appreciate it greatly if you didn't slice, dice,

or puree him."

Vader shrugged, "I wasn't after them anyway. I wanted the scientist Washuu, and

she's evidently not around. Very well. You may all go about your business."

This time, Cypher, for some reason, got ahead of Andrew and before the other

could shut him up, he said,  "Washuu's a little busy at the moment, but she's a

regular pain to us, too. She's got one HUGE ego. Hell, she insulted Glyph the

first time around..."

The other guys looked at him puzzled.

"And, jeez, she practically makes anyone or anything out of interest a science

experiment. You were lucky she found the technology here slow...She pokes and

prods on anything to figure out how it works. Hey," he turned to the rest of the

group, "Anyone here who has been a 'test subject', please raise your hand."

With that, Cypher lifted his, and signaled for the others to do the same. Now

the others got it. He was expecting the Jedri vote, knowing that everyone there

had been 'examined' against his or her will, at least once. REBB01 had been

several times; Cypher hated that centrifuge. And Cypher knew that Tenchi would

definitely raise his...

Then there was Ryoga?

Bryan turned to look at him. "Don't ask," the martial artist responded flatly.

Bryan suddenly remembered the earlier conversation.

"We remember the last time you were here."

"Oh yeah. . . bonzai, Washuu still got that good of a swing?"

"It's improved."

"Ouch."

"What are you two talking about?"

"Don't ask.  Call, raise you one."

Now he was really curious...

 

Ukyo paused outside Glyph's quarters. She noticed that it had finally had gotten

quiet.

"Shara, is there anyone still aboard?" she asked; now feeling a little worried.

"Just you guys," Shara responded. "But from the sound of things, at least it

wouldn't be for long."

"Then the guys are all right?"

 

The guys were more than all right; they were a little surprised about what

Vegeta was asking.

"REBB," he started as they all started back onto the ship. "Glyph wants to know

where you got those 'magic mushrooms' hid. She tells me she found a way to get

back at the guy setting me up against Emeraldas. You can guess who."

Bryan, in hearing the phrase, whipped around. "First booze, now narcotics? REBB

what are you DOIN'?!"

REBB sighed. "Wrong mushrooms."

"Huh?"

"Ryoga knows what type I'm talking about."

Ryoga blinked, but then he saw Andrew signal as if eating, then signaled

something that looked like growing shorter. The last sign was looking like he

was going to suck his thumb.

Mushrooms...eating...baby...argh.

"Oh, those...the ones he talking about make you younger if you eat them." He

paused, not too sure, "But those are dangerous."

Vegeta smiled. "Hopefully not to Xelloss..."

Cypher held a smirk as the guys made their exits.

"I think two of you owe me an apology..."

Andrew rolled his eyes as Bryan looked confused. "An apology for what?"

"Something about the 'lack of social graces'..."

 

Bryan followed REBB in curiosity-and wanted to see what the cybertronian had

meant.

The cybertronian opened his door and suddenly both Bryan and Tenchi leaned

toward each other in puzzlement...

"Did you just hear, 'A Whiter Shade of Pale'?"

"Shara!" REBB groaned.

Shara made an electronic snicker, "Sorry REBB, couldn't resist."

 

Glyph smiled in the kitchen. With Belldandy making the 'innocent' sauce, she

made her mushroom marinade sauce look as pleasing as possible.

"How's the alfredo coming along?" she asked. Her stomach was starting to

grumble. She had been so on edge that she had missed the first round of food.

Belldandy said she had it almost finished.

"Now THIS is going to be pitched once Xelloss has eaten, because you know the

results."

"Right," Belldandy murmured. She knew the others were doing pretty well on the

treasure hunt, so when Vegeta and Glyph called her to help cook...it was no

trouble.

"Yoo-hoo," Urd called. "The dinner guest is here."

 

Emeraldas held her glass of wine in her hand. She wanted to see the malefactor

for herself to be sure. Glyph smiled, made a slight bow to the Trickster Priest,

and asked him to sit down.

"Well, well, it seems the writers have done well for themselves." Xelloss smiled

the indecipherable smile of his.

Then he noticed Emeraldas...and his eyes showed, then narrowed.

"Well, I thought since everyone is planning to celebrate Startica tomorrow. I've

decided to initiate a traditional ritual from my home world. It's inviting a

guest that you do not know well to a small dinner..."

Belldandy and Urd hustled out, as if it were their cue, with the plates of

spaghetti.

"I'm not one that minds Chinese food, but for this tradition, I've decided to

try Italian food. It was always my mother's favorite..."

"I am touched..." Xelloss smiled.

"So am I," Glyph smiled herself. Emeraldas signaled that she wasn't hungry. So

Urd moved onto Glyph's place.

"Would you like the Alfredo or the marinade?" Urd asked, trying to keep sounding

pleasant.

Glyph made a faint sign. "Urd, I can't eat cooked tomatoes, so I have the

alfredo."

Xelloss said that he was just fine with the marinade. Glyph smiled, pleasantly.

But inside she said nothing, but...

Xelloss ate well, saying little conversation. Glyph began to talk to him,

telling about what had happened so far...up to a point.

But by then Xelloss had finished the dish.

"That was a filling dish, Miss Bellchime," he said politely. "It surprises me

that I have never had such a delicacy."

"Probably never again, either..." Emeraldas muttered.

But Xelloss only gazed at her. Glyph smiled, but it did not look cruel.

Up to a point...

She began to say a rap chant, one she had heard from I Shot the Sheriff, under

her breath.

Heartbeat increases...Like beam me up, Scotty...

Xelloss suddenly felt an odd pulse in his ears.

I control your body...

He fell to one knee. Emeraldas jumped from her seat, gazing at Glyph.

"Are you killing him? I can not allow it."

Glyph gave over a smile that definitely different. "Not exactly...but when he

realizes what he just ate, he might wish he was dead."

"What?!" a very shrill voice spoke up. Emeraldas stared, just as Belldandy, Urd ,

 and Vegeta, leaned out the door.

Then Urd started to giggle. "Ah, what a cute little boy!" she cooed.

Xelloss groaned, now at the height of an average six year old...and had the full

appearance of one.

"Ryoga's youth mushrooms, guarantied to youthen you to under ten years of age."

Then Glyph leaned over, "I know you feed off emotions, so I had Urd here block

the emotions of Emeraldas and I. Then the rest was just acting lessons. Now are

you gonna behave yourself? I won't give you the antidote, unless you promise to

behave. "

Xelloss smiled his nonchalant smile, "And suppose I don't? What if I like it

like this? I mean, I just lost over a thousand years off my age, you know."

A gruff voice came from behind Xelloss, "Then I get to punish you for being a

VERY naughty boy."

"V-Vegeta?!" Xelloss looked over at Glyph,

"IpromiseohgodinheavenaboveIpromiseI'llbegood!!!!"

Vegeta picked up Xelloss before he could reach Glyph, and looked at him with a

smirk, "Are you sure you wanna give him the antidote, Bellchime? I mean, he's

soooo much more manageable like this."

Glyph played along, looking thoughtful, "Well, now that you mention it..."

"No fair!" Xelloss looked pleadingly at Emeraldas, "You have to help me!"

"The money you cheated me out of." Emeraldas said.

"Money?"

"He's all yours, Vegeta."

"Oh, that money! Here ya go!" he pulled something from his belt. Xelloss tossed

a large sack of gold onto the table. Emeraldas picked it up.

"Alright, Vegeta, turn him loose," Glyph said.

Vegeta dropped Xelloss unceremoniously on his posterior, and walked off, "See ya

around, Emeraldas. I'm heading back over to hang with the other guys."

"Same place as last time?" Emeraldas asked.

"Sure. And it's your turn to pick up Vash."

"Only if you get Azuza."

"Azuza Jurai?!" Glyph asked.

"Sure. The Juraian deficit didn't come from space tree production, you know,"

Vegeta and Emeraldas exchanged a knowing smile.

"If he loses one more time, I may ask him to engage me to Ayeka," Vegeta

chuckled, "Just to see the look on her face, of course. I wouldn't actually

attempt to marry her."

 

Bryan yawned, "Gee, we've already survived a few life and death situations

today. I'm beat. Andrew, can you handle these nuts while I take a nap. I want to

be fresh for tonight."

Andrew looked puzzled, "Why? What are we gonna do tonight, Bryan?"

"The same thing we do every night. TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"

WHAPANG!

Ukyo knocked him unconscious with her spatula, "Will you not shout! These halls

echo, ya know!" She sighed. Andrew gave a slight smile.

"What brings you here, Miss Kuonji?" Tenchi asked. Ukyo blushed. He was such a

gentleman. Ranma may have been one of the best martial artists in the world, but

she couldn't help but notice that Tenchi was such a gentle soul. And ten times

as polite.

"We...uh...we just needed to ask Cypher a question."

Ayeka watched this exchange with an ever pulsing vein on her forehead. In the

same tone she used for making snide remarks about Ryoko, she said, "Hurry along,

Ukyo, dear. You were going to contact your fianc‚ when we got back, right,?"

 

Ranma and Akane were both searching the rec room aboard the Drummond for their

groups, each one trying to decypher the latest clue.

"What's that?" Akane asked, looking out the window.

"What's what?" Ranma asked.

"That's a weird looking ship," Akane said, "It's just a big block."

"The ugliest block I'd ever seen..." Ranma looked at it, scoffingly.

 

"Miss Bellchime," Zod spoke up, "We may have crossed into hostile space. If I

may direct your attention to the viewer."

"Please tell me that's not what I think it is," Glyph sighed. From one problem

to another...

"Well, alright, but I'm not really programmed to lie. By the way, we're being

hailed."

"Skip it. I know what they're going to say."

"They're attempting to lock on with their tractor beam."

"Washuu, could you come to the bridge, like, right now!"

Washuu appeared out of thin air. She took a look at the screen, and had one

thing to say.

"Eeesh."

"What does the Guide say?"

Here's what the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has to say about the Borg:

Definitely not Swedish.

Glyph gave a very odd chuckle.

"What are we gonna do?"

"Well, I saw something in Bryan's lab that might help. I'll bring it up now."

A large wooden crate appeared on the bridge. In large red letters it said: Open

in case of Borg.

"What could possibly be in there that would repel Borg attacks?" Glyph asked

dubiously.

"Large guns, maybe?"

"Only one way to find out."

They pulled the latch on the crate. The front end fell open, and they both heard

a voice come from inside.

"Oh I'm sooooo depressed. Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and what do I

get to do? Sit in a crate. Wonderful."

Glyph made an odd sound in her throat, a cross between a chuckle and a whine.

Washuu moaned, "Talk about the cure being worse than the disease."

"Marvin?" Glyph said in her most patient voice, pointing like she was the most

timid thing anyone had seen. "Would you talk to the guys on the ship over

there?"

The line went open.

"We are the Borg. Lower your shields and prepare to be assimilated. We will add

your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Resistance is

futile."

"We are having problems of our own," Marvin the Paranoid Android said, "and

would appreciate it greatly if you would go away until a later time."

"Problems are irrelevant."

"Everything is irrelevant," Marvin said, "I mean, the Universe will end one day

anyway, and then that's it. Unless you go to Milliways and go back to the

beginning all over again, but what's the point in surviving another paltry few

eons when there's was no point to it in the first place."

The Borg cube exploded.

"D-did he just bore the Borg into self-destruction?!"

"Or he just really confused them..." Glyph made that same sound at the end of

her sentence. "I didn't make sense of that either..."

"That shows how much you know about..." Marvin began.

"Oh no, you don't pal," Glyph put her hand up. "One more depressed word out of

you, and You might find yourself floating out an airlock...unless..."

Glyph got real quiet, and really a cruel look one her face. "Would you like a

babysitting job? For a couple of kids under the age of seven?"

Washuu shook her head. "You'd kill them."

"I'm talking about Xelloss and Happosai, Washuu," Glyph started.

"You'd still KILL em! From suicide!"

Marvin acted like he didn't care, but Glyph gave up on that idea.

"Maarvin, com'ere a minute," she signaled. Then she gave Washuu a signal...

It looked like a subspace hole. Washuu stared at her. Glyph signaled again. Same

subspace hole, the same sign. What was she getting at?

"Are you doing the Macarena?" Marvin asked, dolefully.

Glyph finally spoke. "HELLO! GENIUS OF THE UNIVERSE! NOT THAT HARD TO FIGURE OUT HERE!" She waved her hands, "Ditch the dude!"

Washuu then produced the subspace hole. If she hadn't already known Glyph's

frustrated tone, she would have been angry. But she also knew that Glyph didn't

make things like that very personal.

"Sorry, Washuu-chan, but you weren't getting it."

 

Cypher paused out side his quarters when he saw Ayeka and Ukyo walking his way.

Belldandy and Lain were right after them.

Ut oh. After the fiasco with Ryoga, he really did not want to find out what the

girls wanted. Fuzzy curled around his legs, so he picked her up, trying to make

it look like he hadn't seen them.

"Hey, Cypher," Ukyo called. Damn! He looked up, holding the little creature a

little funny.

"Uh hi," he started.

"Can we ask you a question?"

Cypher smiled, very weakly. "As long it doesn't require me to fight somebody

that has really bad breath!"

"Huh?"

"Don't ask."

 

Glyph gave a tired sigh, and waved at Emeraldas's parting ship. She knew that

the other captain would be back, and definitely with more people. Hmm.

Why not make this a big bash, one that everyone would remember? "Zod? How many

people can the holographic theater hold if the seats were taken out?"

"Well, if I pull the chairs into the floor, we can accommodate about one-hundred

people, Glyph. Also, I can retract walls between holodecks for more room, if

you'd like."

Perfect! Now she just had to get the cooperation of everyone and...

"Can you get in contact with Bryan, Andrew, and Ryoga? I need them to come over

here secretly...at least those three wouldn't blab right away...and I'll get a

hold of a few others. Washuu-chan," here she tapped her commbadge. "I need a

little favor from you."

 

Ranma blew a breath through her hair. Talking to Ryga of the Wind had come up

with nothing.

 

Bryan woke up in the infirmary with his head hurting. First Akane, then Ukyo,

what had he got with girls that they wanted to bean him across the head, he

wondered. Then he became aware of someone in the room with him.

"Hello, Weber-san," the hologram spoke up. Then he realized that it looked a lot

like Dr. Tofu.

"Do you remember where you are?" the hologram asked, lifting his eyelid

slightly. He shined a small light. Then it disappeared.

"The JEDRI, I hope."

Then he heard the familiar chuckle of someone.

"That's a relief, Ukyo sure packs a wallop," Andrew stopped leaning against the

wall, and  came up to the bio-bed. "I know you would have preferred to visit

your infirmary, but in knowing what's going on over there, I thought it was more

prudent to stay here."

"Where's the other guys?"

Andrew shrugged. "Hanging out, but Glyph has a couple of favors for us..."

 

This time the woman herself came through. Vegeta carried the very young Mazaku,

while Washuu had a very frustrated Happy by the scruff of his neck.

"Do you want help, Glyph-chan?" Andrew muttered. He glared at Happy. Bryan said

nothing, his head rebandaged. Ryoga, Pathos, Tenchi, and REBB stood by.

"Guys, can't you keep out of trouble? And keep these two out of the road? This

includes you Vegeta!"

"Why's everyone gotta blame me?" Vegeta asked.

It was then that Glyph noticed the bandage on Bryan's head, "What happened to

you?"

"I had a close encounter with cooking utensils. I'll be fine in a few minutes.

It takes longer to access powers when I have a headache."

"Listen, we need to ask you to get some stuff ready..."

 

Andrew, Ryoga, Tenchi, and Bryan stood in the JEDRI's holotheater.

"Why here?" Andrew asked.

"Because this is the only place I DARE open this thing," Bryan said, pulling out

a small cylinder, "This thing is a door to the most dangerous realm of time and

space known to man, and it's there that I hid what we'll need."

"You have a subspace access port?"

"This place makes subspace look like a tame kitten," Bryan said, "No offense to

Pathos and his kind."

"None taken, on his behalf."

Bryan opened the doorway, "Tenchi, be ready with those Light Hawk Wings. We're

gonna need 'em."

They walked into the doorway....

Ryoga ducked as a teakettle almost smacked him in the head. He could feel heat

coming off of it.

"DUCK!" Bryan called out.

Andrew hit the deck, but Ryoga wasn't so lucky. A large mallet smacked him right

between the eyes. "Ahow!" he yipped. He reeled before hitting backwards onto the

ground.

"W-where are we?" he managed after sitting up.

"Gentlemen, the most dangerous realm known to mankind. Hammerspace. Watch for

random objects flying about. Especially hammers."

 

Chapter 3

Index