FADE IN: INT. DINING ROOM – MORNING Xena and Gabrielle enter the room to find it packed. Every table is full except for one in the center with a couple empty seats. XENA Let’s try there. Moving through the room, they notice that people are watching them with significant interest. Ignoring it for the moment, they stop at the table with the empty seats. XENA (cont’d) Excuse me? Can we join you? The women at the table all smile and nod. They take their seats, Gabrielle signals to the waitress making the rounds of the room. One of the women extends her hand to Xena. KAZIA I’m Kazia. Those are great costumes by the way. Xena and Gabrielle look at each other and then back to Kazia. GABRIELLE Uh... thanks. XENA (to Gabrielle) When we get done eating we need to find Autolycus. Another woman at the table perks up at his name. JANEE Oooo, do you know him? XENA Too well.
	JANEE He’s just so cute. I hope he signs autographs. KAZIA Knowing Kadmus, he’ll charge extra for them. Gabrielle leans over so she can whisper in Xena’s ear. GABRIELLE Is it just me, or are things getting stranger and stranger? XENA It’s not you. GABRIELLE This is our first time to one of these things. What exactly goes on? JANEE Oh it’s great. We get to see people who actually knew them and.... XENA Knew who? JANEE Xena and Gabrielle, of course. Xena grins and nods her head at Gabrielle. XENA Now it makes sense. The waitress places bowls of a hot breakfast cereal in front of them and pours some harmless looking liquid in their mugs. WAITRESS House special for the symposium. If you want something else it’ll be extra. GABRIELLE This is fine, thanks. XENA (to Kazia) So do you know what room Autolycus is in? KAZIA Oh he won’t be here. He’ll be in the inn down the street. Kadmus never puts his guests in the same inn. He’s afraid they might actually be able to speak to us on their own. XENA I take it this Kadmus fellow is the one who organizes this little shindig? KAZIA Yeah, I suppose I should be more grateful, but it’s hard ya know. GABRIELLE Why?
	KAZIA You’ve really never been to one of these. It’s just that there’s a charge for everything. If he could figure out how to charge for air, he would. XENA So he’s making lots of dinars on this deal? KAZIA Tons. GABRIELLE So other than Autolycus, what else happens at these things? KAZIA Well, there’s the marketplace where you can shop. There’s a costume contest, which I think you’ll win if you enter. JANEE And don’t forget the auctions. KAZIA Right... the auctions. GABRIELLE You don’t sound thrilled. KAZIA Don’t even get me started on the auctions. GABRIELLE So if there’s so much you dislike about it, why do you come? KAZIA My friends. I come here to see them. Most of us only get to see each other once a year. So we all gather here, we get to spend time with each other and do something we enjoy. GABRIELLE Sounds reasonable enough to me. XENA Come on, we need to go find Autolycus. Excuse us, but we really need to get going.
JANEE Sure, we’ll see you later. XENA Count on it. FADE TO: EXT. INN – MORNING Xena and Gabrielle move to the front door of the inn only to be stopped by a large fellow whose head seems to be growing directly from his shoulders. Xena stops and just considers him for a moment before gesturing Gabrielle off to one side. XENA I get the feeling he’s there to keep the general population out. GABRIELLE And how do you suggest we convince him we’re not the general population? XENA I’m glad you asked that. Here’s my plan.... CUT TO: EXT. INN – MORNING Gabrielle, looking a little more ‘seductive’ than normal, saunters up to the guard and tries to get his attention while Xena hangs back and waits for the chance to get in around him. GABRIELLE Hey handsome.
	The guard says nothing. His eyes flicker to her for a moment but then return to stare straight ahead. GABRIELLE (cont’d) I was wondering what you’re doing later tonight? Xena has as much as she can to stifle back chuckles as she watches Gabrielle try her best to get his attention, with no success. As Xena watches, Gabrielle tries a couple more tactics that fail miserably. Finally, in a bit of a huff Gabrielle returns to Xena’s side. GABRIELLE (cont’d) I think he’s dead. XENA He’s very committed to what he’s doing, that’s for sure. GABRIELLE Any more brilliant ideas? XENA None that don’t involve him being in pain. GABRIELLE I don’t think we should hurt him. XENA Probably not. It’s wrong to hurt the brainless. GABRIELLE Of course, you could go try ‘your’ feminine wiles on him. XENA It looks like your wiles put him in a coma. Mine will kill him. GABRIELLE Time to sneak in, isn’t it? XENA Yup. Xena takes a good look at the structure in front of them. XENA (cont’d) I think we should be able to get in the second story. Feel like a little acrobatics? GABRIELLE Sure, I haven’t done anything acrobatic in days. CUT TO: EXT. REAR OF BUILDING – MORNING Xena looks around and points to a second floor balcony. XENA That looks like a good spot. GABRIELLE Good as any. XENA Shall we use number four?
	GABRIELLE That should do the trick. Gabrielle takes a spot below the balcony with her back to it. Xena takes a few steps back and runs toward Gabrielle, who laces her fingers, cupping her hands in front of her. As Xena approaches Gabrielle stoops slightly at the waist, allowing Xena’s foot to rest in her hands. With a groan, she lifts her hands and vaults Xena up into the air. Landing on the front side of the balcony, Xena tests the strength of the railing and then loops her arm through it, reaching down for Gabrielle. XENA Up you go. Xena pulls and swings Gabrielle up to the railing, where she grabs hold next to Xena. GABRIELLE Well, that was fun. They both climb over the rail, moving to a door of the second floor. Xena gives it a gentle push and it opens easily. CUT TO: INT. INN ROOM – MORNING When they step inside, they find a young man with a sheet wrapped around his waist and a young woman in a similar situation, except she is reclined on the bed. GABRIELLE (cont’d) Excuse us. We got locked out.
	Without another word, they exit the room. CUT TO: INT. HALLWAY – MORNING Closing the door behind them they both mask grins as they lean against the wall. GABRIELLE Good thing we weren’t a little earlier. XENA Or a little later. GABRIELLE Good point. So which room do you think belongs to Autolycus? XENA Dunno. Guess we’ll have to narrow our choices. Gabrielle lifts her thumb to point behind them. GABRIELLE We know it’s not this one. XENA One down. FADE TO: INT. ROOM – MORNING XENA This one has to be it. Gabrielle is looking around, pulling open a closet door she nods. GABRIELLE This is it. Taking a step back, she shows Xena a small chest secured with several chains and padlocks. XENA Don’t touch it; knowing him it shoots poison darts too. GABRIELLE Right. She closes the door and shrugs to her partner. GABRIELLE (cont’d) So now what? Want to get comfortable and wait for him to get back? XENA It’s tempting, but I think we’ll find him down at the other inn. He’s probably getting ready to charm the masses.
	GABRIELLE Remember when we find him... he’s our friend. XENA And? GABRIELLE You shouldn’t kill him. XENA I’ll try to remember that. She starts to leave, but hesitates and pulls her sword. GABRIELLE What are you doing? Xena takes her sword and pokes the chest with it. When it doesn’t explode she seems relieved, but still cautious.  She ushers Gabrielle back and hefts the sword, bringing it down on the chest and breaking the locks off of it. With the tip of the sword she lifts the lid. Still nothing happens. XENA He’s getting sloppy in his old age. Sheathing her sword, she reaches down and removes one of two bags. Opening it, she just shakes her head. XENA (cont’d) I take it back. Taking a fist full of the contents, she shows Gabrielle common pieces of metal. Gabrielle chuckles and drops the metal back into the bag. GABRIELLE He’s still on top of things. XENA Let’s go find him. FADE TO: INT. INN – MORNING The inn is once again bustling with people. As Xena and Gabrielle make their way toward the area where the symposium is being held, two men block their path. MAN 1 Tickets? XENA What? MAN 1 I need to see your tickets. GABRIELLE We don’t have any.
	MAN 1 Then you can’t come in. The second man sighs and shakes his head, seemingly not shocked at his friend’s lack of communication skills. MAN 2 If you’d like a ticket, you can get one out front. There’s a registration table set up out there. XENA We really don’t need a ticket; we won’t be here that long. We just need to see Autolycus. MAN 2 Look I’m sorry; there are three hundred people here who want to see him. If you want in you have to pay to get in. GABRIELLE In the main room? MAN 2 The main room. XENA Fine. As they turn to walk away, Xena lowers her voice so only Gabrielle can hear her. XENA I’m going to have to hurt someone very soon if I get told one more time I can’t do something.
	GABRIELLE Then I won’t bother to tell you that you can’t hurt someone. FADE TO: INT. MAIN ROOM – MORNING Xena looks at the line of people waiting before the table they have been directed to. XENA You’ve got to be kidding. Oh I know we’re going in there now. GABRIELLE The curiosity is killing you, isn’t it? XENA It is now. From the front of the line, their friend from breakfast spots them and waves them over. A few people behind them grumble causing Kazia to turn around. KAZIA They were supposed to meet me here, okay? A couple of the loudest grumblers take one look at Xena and capitulate. GABRIELLE Thanks. KAZIA No problem. Hey, I didn’t get your names at breakfast. Gabrielle moves closer and whispers to Kazia. GABRIELLE Do you promise not to make a big deal out of it? KAZIA Sure. GABRIELLE I’m Gabrielle.... Before Kazia can scream Gabrielle places her hand over the girl’s mouth. GABRIELLE (cont’d) You promised. Right?
	Kazia nods slowly. Gabrielle removes her hand and gestures to Xena. GABRIELLE (cont’d) So you know who this is? Kazia nods again, completely speechless. GABRIELLE (cont’d) We’re going to check things out here and we really don’t want a bunch of people knowing we’re here. You have to keep this to yourself. KAZIA I promise. Can I say one thing? GABRIELLE Of course. KAZIA I just... I just want to say, thank you. FADE OUT. END OF ACT ONE