A Journal of thoughts...

by Charlotte Autry-Johns
June, 2005

This year my niece, Amanda Autry, graduated. The graduation
ceremony of the Broken Arrow Class Of 2005 was especially
sentimental to me, partly because my niece was graduating, but
mostly due to the planning of the 25th Reunion of the Broken Arrow
graduating Class of 1980. As Pomp and Circumstance was playing,
I was laughing at my niece who acts so much like myself… laughing, joyful,
looking around for her friends, and looking up to find where
her family was sitting. After a friend of ours pointed out that she
looks and acts so much like me, which of course made me very proud, it was
then that I realized I was sitting in a row of people which consisted
of my precious family, and some very dear friends. Not just any friends,
but four of us sitting in our row had been sitting down on that floor
exactly 25 years before: Brenna Leftwich-Wolfe, Kathy Goodman-Heimbach,
Tami Fyffe-Autry (my sister-in-law), and myself. As I remembered where
I sat through our ceremony 25 years ago, and the friends that I had sat
with, the tears couldn’t help but slip down my cheeks. Then slowly a
cruel reality crept into my mind… This Class of 2005, this group of more than
1000 excited, hopeful, writhing group of young people, with extreme intentions
of changing the world as we now know it, they don’t have any idea what
the next 25 years will bring. As I thought about their innocence, I couldn’t
help but think that many of them will no longer be alive when their 25th
reunion comes around, whether due to drug abuse/addiction, the
tragedy of illness or the tragedy of freak accidents, much like our class.
Many of them will be incarcerated due to a depraved lifestyle, bad choices,
hanging with the wrong crowd, or simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Many of them will be forced to endure the pain of losing a parent or a
child, struggling thru a divorce, the pangs of infertility, and maybe the
joy of adoption, much like myself. Some of them will find themselves in
abusive relationships wondering whether to sever, survive, or die in
the midst of it. Some of them will think about, attempt or succeed at
committing suicide. Many of them will experience the stress of joblessness,
losing their homes or vehicles, or struggling with finances, or the
devastation of bankruptcy, like many of us have. Many of them, their spouses,
or their family members will be diagnosed with incurable diseases,
and they will be forced to watch them decline until the cruel victory of
death brings relief from pain and suffering, as many of us have experienced.
As my mind raced thru the memories of our 25 years since graduation,
I thought of many of our alumni who have been through many of
these situations and yet still have the persevering nature within them
that we had the very day we graduated, while some of them succumbed to
the beast and took matters into their own hands. Did they not know that
there were many of us within arms reach that grew up with them, loved them,
cared for them, and would’ve been the listening ear that they needed to
clear the rough waters to the other side? As my mind floated back
to the celebration at hand, I prayed for the BAHS Class of 2005, that they
would always have a friend in a classmate, that when the rough waters
rush in, that He would put someone in their path to hold their hand.
And I was thankful that He is kind enough to just send us One Day at a Time,
for if He had dumped 25 years worth of events on me in one moment on that
day of graduation, both good and bad, both full of joy and full of sorrow,
that I could not have faced another day in my life. The pain and fear
of knowing what would be over the next 25 years of my life would have
been too much for me to take.


As they filed up on stage to celebrate this major victory
in their life, and they finally got to my niece,
AMANDA LOUISE AUTRY,
the memories made me smile, laugh and cry, ALL AT THE SAME TIME!!!!
And then they said it “SENIORS YOU MAY TURN YOUR TASSLES!!!!!!”
The feeling of “taking on the world” was in my heart again, after 25 years…
WOW….Even after reviewing the last 25 years in my mind...
Hey I’ve got an idea - let’s take on the world again,
my fellow alumni friends, take my hand and let’s do it TOGETHER!!!!!

Charlotte Autry-Johns

June, 2005