Ku-Lon was cooking in the kitchen while watching
the activity in the dinning room during the lunch rush. Shan-Pu is weaving
between tables balancing a huge tray in one hand while deftly avoiding
the roving hands of the younger students who are trying to cop a feel.
The bell rang again. More customers have entered the Neko-hanten.
“Mu-Tsu! Show those people to an empty table!”
she yelled at the near blind Master of hidden weapons. Then she hopped
over to the pot behind her not waiting for his reply.
“Yes elder," he replied then he walked
over to a support post while adjusting his glasses. “How many in
your party sir?” he asked the post. When he received no answer
Mu-Tsu repeated himself. “Sir I asked you, How many?”
When Ku-Lon returned to the window carrying two bowls of ramen for table
three, she sees Mu-Tsu talking to one of the support posts again. “Oh,
not again!” she said as she slapped her fore head, and rolled her
eyes in disgust. Ku-Lon picked up a water balloon and rearing back for
a direct hit to his head, she throws it. “Mu-Tsu! Stop talking
to the support post and get back to work!” she yelled at him. As
the blind martial artist head snaps to attention, the water balloon
sails past him and hits a near by table. Splat. The water is making
a beeline towards him and he jumps back in fear.
“Geah! Geez! I’m moving you dried
up old prune,” he mutters under his breath as he finally locates
the new customers, and shows them to the right table.
“I heard that Mr. Part timer! Now you have
some extra chores tonight! You will do Shan-Pu’s chores along with
your own.
Mu-Tsu cringes and mutters something too low
for her to hear. Then he walks towards an empty table and starts to
clear the dishes.
“Great grandmother?” Shan-Pu said.
“Yes Shan-Pu what is it,” Ku-Lon replied
as she stirred another pot of ramen.
“Shan-Pu go see Ranma when customers gone,
is ok?” she said.
“That’s fine, but only after the customers
are gone, then you may go see son-in-law. I’ll make up an extra
special batch of Dim-sum and Ramen for you to catch your wayward husband,”
Ku-Lon said as she hopped around the kitchen on her staff.
“Thank you Great-grandmother!” Shan-Pu
replied, smiling at Ku-Lon, then she started to bounce around the restaurant
while expressing her happiness in the only way she knew how. Shan-Pu
sang and Amazonian war song.
Mousse had just finished up cleaning and preparing
the table for the next customers when he heard Shan-Pu start to sing.
It was the only song that made him loose control over his emotions.
The song told the story of how the Amazons won their freedom from the
outsiders. Mousse put down the washrag, pulled his glasses up and placed
them on his head as he turned toward what he though was Shan-Pu.
“Oh Shan-Pu! You sing so well and that
song, You know what it does to all Amazons,” he said as he raced
towards a purple blob off to his left glomping it.
“Stupid Mousse! That not Shan-Pu! That
is Shan-Pu’s new rain coat,” she yelled as she waked him on
his head causing his glasses to fall over his eyes.
“Oww!, Shan-Pu how did you get over there?”
he asked as he glanced at her then at the object he was holding. “Whoops,”
he thought to himself as he let go of the coat and rack; turning Mu-Tsu
ran to hug the correct target of his affections.
Shan-Pu saw him heading in her direction and spinning quickly to avoid
him; she snap-kicked him into the wall with a loud SPLAT! “Mu-Tsu
leave Shan-Pu alone! Shan-Pu never go with stupid duck boy!” Shan-Pu
is Ranma’s!” she yelled at the new wall decoration as she
turned and stomped out of the restaurant heading for the dojo.
As Mu-Tsu slid down the wall with a groan he
quickly though out a plan to make Shan-Pu his. “First I must defeat
Saotome, then Shan-Pu will be mine!” he thought to himself. Then,
yelling loudly, he stood up and charged out after Shan-Pu, “DIE
SAOTOME!”
Ku-Lon watched the two run out of the restaurant, “Kids these days,
so energetic,” she muttered to herself as she shook her head, while
thinking up a suitable punishment for Mu-Tsu because he had left before
finishing up his chores.
*******************************************
It was early morning at the Tendo’s. The table is set for breakfast.
Soun was reading his paper as Kasumi walked in with breakfast. Soun
decided that he would enjoy the quiet while he could. Then the phone
rang.
Nabiki answered it. “Hello?” Um, yes
he is, ok. Nabiki turned and yelled, “Father its for you.”
“Who is it Nabiki?” he asked without
moving from his position behind his morning paper.
“It’s the mayor daddy. He wants to
talk about the panty thief again,” she replied as she placed the
phone down on the counter. Then, she returned to the table and proceeded
to eat her breakfast as fast as possible.
“Nabiki, you should slow down or you'll
choke,” Kasumi said softly while watching her sister doing a slower
impression of Ranma eating.
“Can’t! I have a business meeting
in an hour and I don’t have the right suit picked out to wear!”
she wailed almost like their father.
Kasumi smiled and relaxed. She had been wondering
whether or not Nabiki was adopted. Now, she was sure that she definitely
was her sister. That emotional outburst cinched it. Kasumi knew now
that like herself, Nabiki was able to pen up her emotions, and only
show the world what they wanted them to see. Kasumi watched her father
walk over to the phone and listened with half an ear.
“Hello. Soun Tendo here. How may I help
you?”
“Tendo, I called you to help me organize
a meeting of all of the residents in Nerima so we can discuss the panty
thief. We need to talk about how we are going to handle it,” the
mayor said in a demanding voice.
“Yes sir, I’ll call a meeting for
two days from now to be held at Furinkin High school’s auditorium,”
Soun replied as he jotted down a few notes.
“That’s fine Tendo. We really need
to take care of this right away, otherwise the district may elect Kuno
for mayor. UGH! Now that’s scary! He may be one of the richest
men in Tokyo but that guy is a loon!” the mayor said.
“I couldn’t agree with you more Mr.
Mayor,” Soun replied as he started searching through a draw for
the phone book. As he was reaching to grab the book he heard a familiar
booming noise coming from the wall right in back of him.
“What is that racket?” the mayor asked
him.
“Oh, that’s Shan-Pu mayor, she’s
one of Ranma’s friends who just doesn’t seem to know what
a door is for, so she just makes her own. It is somewhat annoying because
of the amount of damage she does to my house. “I have to go Mr.
Mayor, I’ll see you at the school,” Soun said as he hung up
the phone. When he turned around he saw the wall cave in, crushing the
TV. From the dust cloud Shan-Pu bounced in. “Oh, the horror!”
Soun yelled then proceeded to relieve stress the only way he knew how.
“Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa,” he cried as he collapsed onto the floor
in a quivering mass of flesh.
“Ayah! Ranma eat too too delicious Ramen
Shan-Pu make special for you. Then Ranma take Shan-Pu on date!”
the Amazon yelled as she ran through the newly made door in the wall.
Kasumi hurried to her father’s side with
a bucket and a few dish- towels to clean up the mess. “Oh my, we
have a visitor father, there is no reason you should get so excited,
you really should calm down its not good for you,” Kasumi said
as she turned towards their new guest. “Hello Shan-Pu, its so nice
of you to stop by for a visit, would you like some tea?”
“Shan-Pu thank you but, I bring lunch for
husband. Ranma home, yes?” Shan-Pu said as she looked around the
room searching for Ranma. “Tea would be nice, Shan-Pu thank,”
the Amazon said as she sat down at the table placing the box of Ramen
in front of herself.
“Oh my Shan-Pu but, I’m afraid that.
. . ,”Kasumi started to say when she was interrupted by three more
visitors.
“Not that way stupid! The dojo is this
way!” Ukyo said.
“Thanks Ukyo,” Ryoga said.
“No you idiot!. . . Awww jeez! Here...
hold my hand and I’ll lead you there,” Ukyo yelled.
“Shan-Pu! Wait for me my love! Ranma Saotome
today is the day I defeat you and reclaim my lovely Shan-Pu for my bride!”
Mu-Tsu proclaimed as he stepped through the wall. Spotting her sitting
on a cushion, Mu-Tsu quickly ran towards her only to be stopped short
as a human projectile came flying through the hole in the wall to land
on the table out cold, with blood leaking from his nose.
“You idiot! That’s not my hand!”
Ukyo screamed as she stomped over to the prone form of Ryoga who was
unfortunate enough to land on the table. “You jackass! If you ever
grab me there again you’ll get more than a punch in the face for
that!” she breathed heavily as she glared down at Ryoga while shaking
her fist in a threatening manor.
“Why hello Ukyo, Mu-Tsu, Ryoga. Would you
like some tea too, I was just about to get some for Shan-Pu,” Kasumi
said as she smiled and tried to diffuse the potential situation for
disaster. They nodded their heads in an affirmative gesture. Taking
that to mean that they would love a nice cup of tea, Kasumi went into
the kitchen to retrieve the tea set.
“Ukyo, what was it that Ryoga grabbed to
make you act like that?” Mu-Tsu asked her as he adjusted his glasses
while peering at the two new arrivals.
Blushing. Ukyo brought both her hands up to her
face, covering her burning cheeks she stared daggers at Ryoga who was
just waking up from his impromptu nap. “Ummm. . . he uh grabbed
my mmmfffaff,” she mumbled through her hands.
“What spatula girl say?” Shan-Pu asked
her as she raised her eyebrows with a puzzled expression.
“Uhnnn. . . “ Ryoga groaned as he
sat up and looked around the room. When he heard Shan-Pu’s question
he automatically blurted out the answer. “I grabbed her rear-end
by accident! I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going. Something
caught my attention from the corner of my eye, it kind of distracted
me. I looked to see what it was. Really! I swear!” he said as he
finally noticed Ukyo glaring at him again. Ducking his head in embarrassment
he slowly edged off the table and glanced towards the two Amazons. Both
had similar expressions of astonishment mixed with amusement on their
faces.
“Oh this is so embarrassing!” Ukyo
moaned as she glanced at Mu-Tsu and Shan-Pu. She then decided to sit
down next to Shan-Pu and as far away as possible from Ryoga. Mu-Tsu
she noticed was inching his way over to sit next to Shan-Pu’s other
side. “Hey where’s Ranma?” she asked as she placed her
gift on the table next to the slightly battered box of Ramen.
“Shan-Pu was finding that out when Spatula
girl and Pig boy come through door,” Shan-Pu said as she glared
at the two new arrivals.
“Well excuse me for interrupting!”
Ukyo yelled as she glared back at her rival.
“Hey! Cut it out guys! We're guests here
and besides, Ranma isn’t here,” Ryoga said as he placed his
hand between the two girls, effectively canceling out the upcoming fight.
Both Ukyo and Shan-Pu turned their attention towards the person who
interrupted their fight and started to crack their knuckles in anticipation
of a brutal beating to be dished out.
“What you do, pig boy! You no interrupt
fight of Amazon womans,” Shan-Pu said menacingly as she stalked
closer towards her intended target. “Besides,” she
thought to herself, “beating someone up; preferably a male is
somewhat therapeutic in letting out my frustration of not being able
to find Ranma, and Ryoga can take more damage than most people since
he has undergone the Buksi Ten Ketsu training.”
“YEAH! Ukyo yelled, as she pulled her battle
spatula from is holster on her back and readied herself to smash him
flat.
Ryoga saw the two pissed of female martial artists
advancing in his direction and quickly tried to think up a way to diffuse
the situation. He was having a problem thinking until he backed himself
into the wall. “Eeep! Um guys, I only meant that we should be polite
and not wreck the house since Kasumi would be very angry with us,”
he said, waving his hands in front of himself in anticipation of pain
to come. Just as the two girls were about to make his life a living
hell for the day, he spotted Kasumi entering from the kitchen carrying
a tray with tea and cookies.
Mu-Tsu spotted Kasumi at the same time that Ryoga
had and decided to help the lost boy out. “Thank you Kasumi for
the tea,” he said loudly enough for the two preoccupied girls to
hear. Then giving Ryoga a small smile in acknowledgement to the slight
nod of Ryoga’s head.
Ukyo and Shan-Pu both jumped at the sound of
Mu-Tsu’s voice since they had both forgotten he was there. Turning
around, the girls quickly made their way back to the table to listen
to what Kasumi was going to say.
“Now that everyone is here, I can tell
you that Ranma and Akane went on a training trip to the location that
was chosen by Ranma’s father. I’m not allowed to reveal this
location to any of you. So don’t bother asking me as I promised
Ranma’s mother on my honor,” Kasumi said as she finished pouring
the tea and handing out the cookies.
“Why did they go on another training trip
Kasumi?” Ukyo asked before she sipped her tea.
“Yeah, Akane wouldn’t really want
to go with Ranma on this trip,” Ryoga said as he thumped his hand
on the table to make his point heard.
“Unless it was for them to get married
while they are away!” Ukyo yelled as she jumped to her feet and
turned towards the others. “Come on you guys lets go!” she
yelled.
“Aiya! Ranma no marry pervert girl! Ranma
is Shan-Pu’s husband. Shan-Pu go find them now!” she said
as she followed Ukyo out the door while waving one of her bonbori in
the air.
“Ranma...marring Akane!” Ryoga screamed
as he jumped to his feet ran after the two girls.
“Saotome! I will defeat you and Shan-Pu
will be mine!” Mu-Tsu yelled as he chased after the rest of the
gang.
Kasumi blinked as the dust cleared showing a
now empty room. “Oh my, I guess they don’t want father's special
tea and the cookies I brought them,” Kasumi said as she grinned
like Nabiki would have when she cinched a good deal.
Kasumi picked her teacup and took a sip as she watched the dust cloud
disappear over the horizon. “Oh well, I better get some chores
done or they won’t do them by themselves,” Kasumi said as
she glanced around the room. Noting the mess that the four visitors
left and the slowly trickling stream coming from her father that was
starting to run through the room towards the koi pond Kasumi looked
at the stream and said, “Oh my. I better get a mop to clean up
this mess.
“Bwaaaaaaaaa. . . My wall. . .m. ..my house!
Waaaaaaaa,” Soun wailed, as he covered he eyes with his arm and
started to cry harder. When he looked back up he saw that most of the
mess had been cleaned up and that there were buckets right next to him.
Both were full with his tears and ready to be dumped out. Deciding that
he needed a fortifying sip of tea to calm his nerves he reached for
one of the cups poured for Ranma’s friends and took a small sip.
Noting the slight aftertaste but deciding to ignore it he stood and
walked over towards the pails. As he started to bend down to lift them
he heard a familiar cry ring throughout the neighborhood that froze
him in his tracks with dread.
“PERVERT!”
“AAAAAHHHHHH!”
“LETCHER!”
“GET HIM GIRLS”
“GIVE ME BACK MY PANTIES!”
“WHATA HALL, WHAOO! WHAT A HALL!”
Slowly Soun’s head turned to face the open
shoji doors towards the sound of a stampede that seemed to be heading
straight for his home. The only thought that ran through his head before
he was trampled by Happosai and horde of women was, “The Master
is back!”
*******************************************
Later that night,
“Where is all that racket coming from!
I can’t even get a good deal on the American tech stocks if I can’t
hear the market. I mean its bad enough that Ranma’s friends destroyed
the TV, but now when its really important that I get this deal done
I CAN’T HEAR THE RADIO BECAUSE OF SOME STUPID NOISE COMING FROM
THE LIVING ROOM!” Nabiki screamed as she started to breath heavily
while stomping down the stairs only to freeze as she saw her father
on his knees pleading with Master Happosai. Nabiki decided to watch
from the base of the stairs to get the inside info on the whereabouts
of Ranma and Akane. “Who knows, I might make a few profitable deals
selling this information to Ranma’s friends,” Nabiki murmured
to herself as she strained to hear every detail.
“Please master, spare your most humble
student and accept my apologies. I had no idea you were going to stop
by to teach Ranma a new technique. I’ll do anything to make it
up to you!” Soun wailed.
“SOUN! I am very displeased with you but
the only way to make it up to me is to tell me where Ranma and my worthless
student Genma went off to!” Happosai said as he glared down at
Soun.
“But master I only know that they went somewhere close to Mount
Terror. I believe you took us there once,” Soun said as he groveled
at Happosai’s feet.
“Ah! Now I remember! It was the time I
took you two north on a short training journey,” Happosai murmured
as he started puffing on his pipe. “Don’t hold dinner for
me as I’ll be going now. Ranma, Akaneee wait for Happy!” he
yelled as he bounded out the door and over the wall surrounding the
dojo.
Nabiki, turning, grinned as she went back up
stairs to plan lots of ways to milk everyone dry. As she turned the
corner she could hear her father very faintly say. “Better Saotome
deals with The Master than me.”
***************************************************************************