| Chapter Two (with special thanks to Tricia who helped me write quite a bit of this chapter!) Joey laughed as he watched his mother chase his daughter waving a diaper around in the air. He bent down to kiss his wife. "How are you feeling?" he asked as he sat down in the chaise lounge next to her. "FAT!" Dee said, shifting her pregnant body. "Well, you look beautiful," he replied. "I bet you say that to all the girls." "Not anymore!" he grinned. "After 8 years and 3 and a half kids, you'd better not!" Dee scolded. Joey loved this woman. She'd learned to live with so many of his idiosyncrasies and numerous bad habits over the past eight years. But best of all, she had made him the center of her world. Maybe it was selfish. But what man didn't like being the center of a woman's world? And he loved doing things with her. It could be something simple like making a big Italian dinner together or taking the kids to the park. She was beautiful; he was proud to be seen with her. She was intelligent; he liked hearing about her work teaching Hematology to the medical assistant students at the local college. And she loved hearing about all of his ventures whether it be acting or singing. He loved the closeness they shared. When he thought about growing old, he thought about them sitting on their front porch swing, grandchildren in their laps, reminiscing about the "good old days." His memory was jogged to the time he'd almost lost Dee before their relationship had barely begun…… JC's words rang in his head. "You big idiot! You barely know this girl, you've never been out in public with her as Joey Fatone of NSync, and you invite her to Las Vegas for the charity event where there's going to be thousands of fans and press people watching her and you won't even be with her most of the time???? It'll be like feeding her to the lions!" "It'll be okay, JC! My whole family is going to be there. My mom and Janine will take care of her." "Oh, so you expect her to meet your family AND get put under the microscope by the media and the fans all in one weekend? You trying to scare her away permanently?" "Of course not…" "Well, how much does Dee mean to you, Joey?" "I'm not sure, JC. We've only been together two days, but we've talked on the phone almost every night since then for a month. I know I want to be with her more. I want to get to know her better. I want her to get to know me too." "This is so uncharacteristic for you, my man. And I'm telling you, bringing her to Las Vegas is NOT the way to do it!" "Chill JC! She'll be fine. Dee is strong." But Dee wasn't fine or strong. She wasn't ready for what being the girlfriend of a member of NSync entailed. And Joey should've listened to JC. It all started when Joey insisted on meeting Dee's flight at the airport. Todd tried to talk him out of it, saying he'd pick Dee up and bring her back to the hotel and nobody would have to know who she was, but Joey was adamant. He hadn't seen Dee in 4 weeks, had hoped but never really expected to see her again when they'd parted in Milwaukee, but after those late night phone calls, realized he needed to see her again and had taken the chance by sending her a plane ticket to Las Vegas. Everything went smoothly, except for Joey's pacing at the gate. "Chill, man! The plane is taxiing in right now!" Todd said, patting Joey on the back. Joey watched from the window as the Midwest Express jet pulled up to the gate. He anxiously watched the passengers coming off the walkway. He thought it was taking forever and was getting impatient, pacing back and forth and then he saw Dee. Without even thinking, he pushed past people and rushed toward her, took her in his arms and hugged her tightly. "Oh Deeds…" he breathed in her ear. Dee laughed. "It's good to see you too, Joey!" Just as Joey leaned down and kissed her, a flash went off, and another. Todd was there in a split second, putting one arm around Dee and the other around Joey and started moving them to the exit at a run. "Sorry, man, I didn't expect it," he mumbled to Joey. "Yeah, me either." Joey replied, looking beyond Todd to see Dee's face, which looked like it was frozen in fear. "What's going on?" she asked as Todd's grip on her tightened. "Damn press!" Joey grumbled. "Welcome to the world of NSync!" Todd told her as they went through the door and to the waiting limo. Todd went to collect Dee's bag from the luggage carousel and once he was back inside the limo, they sped off toward the hotel. Joey noticed that Dee was sitting on the far side of the seat and looking out the window, her face expressionless. "Come here…" he said, leaning over and pulling her to him. Dee smiled weakly. Joey didn't even want to know what she was thinking. It was written all over her face. "I'm sorry…" he started. "No, don't be sorry. It's not your fault. I guess I just wasn't prepared." Dee laid her head on Joey's chest as he squeezed her close. Joey exchanged a look with Todd that said "this better not happen again this weekend." Todd nodded. The limo pulled up to the MGM Grand rear entrance and Todd got out of the limo and opened the back door. Joey took Dee's hand and helped her out and kept holding it as they walked to the door. There were a few girls milling about and one asked, "Joey can we have your autograph please?" Joey looked at Todd who nodded an "okay" and walked over to girls. He tucked Dee's hand into his jacket pocket and took the girl's pen and signed a picture of him taken the day before at the Celebrity Challenge, dunking a basketball with his shorts around his ankles and his boxer-briefs shown to the world. Joey laughed. "I should've known this picture would circulate!" "Oh, now that's cute……" Dee said, smiling at the girls. They giggled and thanked Joey for signing their pictures. Todd took Joey and Dee up to the floor that NSync and their entourage completely occupied, gave Joey Dee's bag and then went on his way, telling Joey if he needed him or was going out later to call him. "Well, this is your room," Joey said, putting down the bag and getting the room key out of his back pocket. "You don't mind sharing a room with my sister, Janine, do you?" Dee was caught off-guard. She hadn't actually thought about where she'd be staying once she got to Las Vegas, she just knew that she wanted to see Joey again……needed to see him. She decided to tackle this with humor. She placed her hands on her hips, fixed Joey with a stern stare and said, "You mean I come all the way to Las Vegas to be with you and you want me to stay with your sister???????" Joey looked at the floor and kind of shuffled his feet a bit. "Well, I was hoping you'd say that, but I didn't want to seem too bold." Dee giggled. This shy side of Joey Fatone was one she hadn't seen before and it was so damned sexy. "But what will your mama say, Joey?" she asked, coyly. "What mama doesn't know, won't hurt her," he growled, pulling her close. "I thought you said your whole family was going to be here." "They were supposed to, but my dad wasn't feeling well, so they went home yesterday. Now, we can stand here talking all night, or we can go over to my room." Joey leaned down and planted a gentle kiss on Dee's lips as he turned and started walking down the hall, not waiting for her answer. He opened his hotelroom door and led Dee inside. He saw the look of shock on her face. "What army is staying in this room?" she asked, looking around at the mess. Empty bottles of everything from Aquafina to Corona beer. Pizza delivery boxes. At least ten towels draped over chairs and on the floor. Clothes. Joey rubbed the back of his neck, as he tried to hide the disaster in his room. "Umm guess I should have had Lance pick this stuff up, huh?" Dee laughed and held up a pair of pants that were decidedly NOT Lance's. She knew this because Joey wore them in one of the videos. She'd been "studying up" on NSync ever since she'd met them in June. "So what exactly is it that Lance is doing in your room?" Dee asked, walking her way gingerly through the detritus. "We're roommates. We share a room on the tour, " Joey said, matter-of-factly, while grabbing some underwear, socks, pants and stuffing them into the closet. "So, tell me what kind of a signal do you leave for your roomie when you want to be left alone?" Dee asked with a slightly raised eyebrow. "I put a towel on the door handle and when he knocks I hand him your room key and remind him Janine is LIKE a sister to him too." "Why does it sound like you've done this before?" she said, smiling slyly. He approached her slowly, swaying slightly, put his hands on her waist and pulled her close. His lips were within a hairs breadth of hers when he replied, "But never with anyone as special as you." Joey and Dee were locked in a pretty passionate embrace when the door flew open. "Hey Joey, are you going with us to……………woops, sorry, didn't mean to intrude." There stood Lance, his face turning twenty shades of red. "Dammit Lance! Doesn't the towel mean ANYTHING??" Joey roared. Lance giggled. "Yeah, it means Joey can't keep his laundry in the room." Joey and Dee, still with their arms around each other, started to giggle along with Lance. "Good to see you, Dee! How is Melanie doing?" Lance asked, unconsciously picking up clothes as he made his way further into the room. "She's doing okay. Her grandmother's funeral is Monday. She's just totally bummed that she couldn't come out here to see you." "Well, that makes two of us," Lance sighed. "I'm going to call her before we go out tonight." "But she did give me something to give you," Dee said, disentangling herself from Joey. She walked over to Lance, put her arms around his shoulders, and planted a kiss on his lips. Dee didn't think Lance could turn any redder than he had been when he walked in on her and Joey, but she was wrong. "Umm…tell her, thanks…er…I guess." Lance saw a bag that was unfamiliar to him and realized it belonged to Dee. "Joey, you aren't going to let Dee stay here are you?" It was Dee's turn to blush. "Officially, she's staying in Janine's room. Unofficially we haven't decided what we're going to do about that yet." Lance looked totally confused, but decided not to pursue it any further. "So, are you guys going to go out with us? I just came back to get my jacket. Wade knows someone who owns a club on the Strip." Joey looked at Dee. "Ummm, I think we're going to stay in tonight." "I've been up since 5am, Lance. I had to work today before I flew out. I don't even think the loud music would keep me awake tonight!" Dee explained. Lance grinned a "yeah, sure" kind of grin and said, "Okay, well have fun. See ya'll later." "Tell Melanie I got here safe and sound," Dee told him. "Now, if only you can stay that way," Lance mumbled as he opened the door. "What?" "NOTHING!!! Have a good evening you two." And they did have a good evening, even taking a step towards wonderful. They sat and cuddled and talked in a private glass-enclosed lounge at the end of their floor, overlooking the city and the night lights. What Joey liked the most about Dee was the she liked to talk to him and even more, she seemed to love listening to him. Joey felt as though he could share everything with her, she was more then a friend or girlfriend, this was the one he felt was his soul mate. That's why he was so disturbed the next day when he saw some fans approach her during the basketball game. Dee's attention was diverted from him and the game to something the fan was holding in her hand. Joey noticed the smile fade from Dee's face. He saw a look of sadness then disgust as she rose to her feet, left her seat and ran up the aisle. "You playin' or not, Joey?" Justin asked, noticing Joey's attention was not on the game, but in the stands. Joey glanced up at the clock and noticed there were only 10 seconds left in the half. He took the ball from Justin, dribbled down court, made the shot and continued running off the court, up the aisle and down the hall looking for Dee. Searching, he found nothing but a torn up picture on the floor. Stopping, he picked it up and looked at it. He mumbled an expletive and ran on screaming her name. He heard sobs coming from a small corridor, one he would have certainly passed if he had not heard the noise. He turned and found Dee huddled in a corner, her eyes streaming tears and with a look that portrayed anger and sadness. He wanted to talk to her, to explain. Unfortunately, there wasn't enough time to say all the things he wanted to say or needed to say to ease her mind. He took her in his arms and silently held her for a moment. "If there was ANY way that I could shield you from the fans and the media, you know I'd do it. I don't ever want to see you hurt. I think you know that after all we shared last night. I wish I could tell you that the picture of you and I kissing in the airport was the only one out there and by you tearing it up would be the last of it. But I can't promise you that. All I can promise is that I'll be there for you and try and make it easier for you. Okay?" Joey pulled away from Dee and put his finger under her chin and tilted her head up to him. Her eyes no longer held the anger or sadness. He sighed a sigh of relief and kissed her gently. "Now, I have to get back to the basketball game, " he said, taking her hand and running down the hall with her. He ran into the arena, down the aisle and to the bench and sat Dee down. "Joey! I can't sit here!" Dee protested. "Quiet woman, or I'll plant a kiss on you right now and REALLY embarrass you!" he replied, running out onto the court to a bewildered team. Dee toyed with the idea of making a noise for the sake of another fabulous Fatone kiss, but decided just to put a smile on her face instead and look as inconspicuous as she could sitting on the Knights bench. After the game, Joey took his sister aside and asked her to talk to Dee while they got ready that evening for the post-charity party at Planet Hollywood. Dee was in Janine's room, pulling on the black leather pants that Melanie had given her and she'd never had the courage to wear. Somehow, she thought this would be the weekend to get gutsy. "Oh I think my brother is going to appreciate those!" Janine said, smiling broadly as she brushed her hair and pulled it up on top of her head and pinned it in place. "A bit too much you think? I mean, considering that I've already been hounded by fans and the press?" Dee adjusted the one-shouldered purple clingy top and grabbed the gold belt and put it around her hips. "I'll be honest with you Dee, " Janine said, sitting down on the bed. "Joey told me about what happened at the airport and I saw what happened at the basketball game today. He asked me to talk to you." Dee looked at Janine with a look that almost pleaded for answers to the unasked questions she had. Janine asked Dee to sit down with her as she tried to delicately explain what it was going to be like to be the girlfriend of a member of Nsync. "When you are out in public with Joey, you are going to be watched. You won't have privacy. It won't be you and Joey, it'll be you and Joey and the media and the fans. You're going to have to grab those private moments when you can, when you're alone. And there will be plenty of private moments, but they will at times be overshadowed by the reality that you are involved with Joey Fatone of NSync and that is not the same as being involved with Joe Smith of East Podunk. Now it just depends on how badly you want to be with Joey Fatone whether or not you'll accept all the baggage that goes with that." Dee sat quietly, fidgeting with her belt. That was the million-dollar question. Was she willing to put up with that scary feeling of having her every move watched and scrutinized to be with the man she thought she was falling in love with? Dee's thoughts and her answer to Janine were interrupted by a knock on the door and a "are you two ready to go?" from Joey. Janine gave Dee a hug. "Well, you think about it. And please, let Joey know how you feel as soon as you figure it out. He's got it bad for you, honey. I've never seen him like this before." "I will. I promise." Janine went to the door and turned to Dee. "Well, are you ready to turn my brother on with that outfit?" "You'd better open the door before I lose my nerve!" Dee made one last adjustment to her outfit and tried not to feel self-conscious as Janine opened the door. Joey looked at Dee and Dee looked at Joey and in unison they let out a breathless, "Wow!" Joey was wearing brown leather pants, a gold knit T-shirt and a reddish-brown leather jacket and whatever cologne he had on made Dee's knees wobble. Joey's eyes traveled from Dee's toes to her head and back down again and the look on his face was obviously one of approval. All Joey could think was that given the problems with the press and fans that day, she had taken a step toward accepting the attention she was going to receive by being with Joey Fatone. Especially dressed like that! Maybe she was not as scared as he thought. She looked strong and ready to take on anyone and for that he was grateful. "My God Deeds, you are stunning" Joey said taking her hand in his and gently brazing her knuckles with a kiss. "You don't look half-bad yourself, Mr. Fatone," Dee replied, breathing in the wonderful scent of his cologne. With that, they were out the door and into their limousine along with Janine, Lance, Chris and of course, Todd. The conversation in the limo was light, there were compliments exchanged over each other's outfits. The limo driver informed the group they were pulling up and told them there was a good number of fans and press waiting for them. Joey took Dee's hand and lightly squeezed it. She squeezed his in return signaling she was ready. Joey looked for a sign of panic on Dee's face, but all he saw was a glance as calm as a river. He whispered in a low voice "Are you okay?" Dee shook her head and smiled at him "More then okay." "We'll run interference for you two," Chris said, getting out of the limousine first, followed by Lance. "Actually, that's MY job!" Todd said. "And I need to redeem myself for yesterday's incident at the airport!" he added, laughing. There was an onslaught of screams and flashbulbs already focused on Lance and Chris when Joey got out and turned to help Dee out of the limo. He decided not to be shy, wanting to make a public statement without words about who Dee was and why she was there with him. He put his arm tightly around her and held her close to him as they walked on the red carpet into Planet Hollywood. Dee actually smiled up at him as the flashbulbs went off all around them. "There, that wasn't so bad was it?" he asked as they got inside the doors. "Not with you glued to my hip." Joey laughed and squeezed her shoulder. "Let's go do some dancing," he said, taking her hand and leading her onto the jam-packed dance floor. Joey was having the time of his life. He was so proud to be with Dee and show her off. She seemed to be enjoying herself in his world too. They danced together most of the evening until she begged him to let her rest and asked him to get her something to drink. Dee sat down as close as she could get to the "NSync table" where there were two seats open. Someone sat down next to her and she expected it to be Joey returning with their drinks, but her smile faded. She turned to see a woman with long, brunette hair, wearing heavy makeup, tight red leather pants and a halter top showing off the fact that she could probably breastfeed an entire small third world country. The woman was staring at her and making Dee feel a bit uncomfortable for the first time that evening. "Hi," she tentatively said, looking over the woman's shoulder, hoping Joey would return instantly. "Hi. I just wanted to let you know that Joey and I spent the night together Friday. I don't know who the hell you are, but if you think you can waltz in here with him and pretend to be his girlfriend, you've got a lot to learn. Joey doesn't have ONE girlfriend. He has a string of them. You don't look like you're ready to stand in line. I just thought I'd warn you." And with that, she stood up and sashayed off toward the bar. Dee sat and stared at this woman as she walked away. She felt a lump come up in her throat that she could not force down. She felt light-headed as though she were going to faint. She needed some fresh air. A million thoughts raced through her mind as she ran into the hallway. She admitted to herself that she was crazy in love with Joey Fatone. She longed for him when they were apart, longed for him to hold her, kiss her and when they were together, she was at peace. Until now. Now, she felt the same fear she had felt in the airport and again at the basketball game. Who was she kidding? She couldn’t live this lifestyle even if it meant losing Joey. Tears flowed down her face as her fear turned to grief. If she walked away now, she'd never hold him again, touch him again, feel his hot breath on her skin. She couldn't imagine how hard it would be to know that he existed but she couldn't see him or talk to him ever again, never hear his voice husky with passion, never touch his face tenderly. Dee reached the front doors of Planet Hollywood and was about to run out into the cold night air when she realized the crowd of people was still there. She panicked and turned around and ran straight into someone. "Oh excuse me, I…….." "Dee, what the hell are you doing?" Joey roared, grabbing her by the arms a bit too roughly. It was then that he noticed that she was crying and he was completely confused by her change in demeanor from only moments ago. "Joey, I can't do this," she sobbed, pushing herself away from him. "Dee, what are you talking about? I don't understand this at all. Everything has been so perfect tonight……" Joey shook his head, hoping that he'd wake up from the nightmare he found himself in. "Joey, I love you. I haven't wanted to say that until I was sure. But I was never so sure as I was last night when we talked all night. However, there's this little problem called 'fame' and all that goes with it……" "But Dee, you were so "okay" with that tonight, what changed all that?" "The brunette with the big boobs who told me that you and she spent the night together on Friday," Dee said matter-of-factly. "What??????" "I honestly don't care if it's true or not at this point, Joey. But I'm not sure I can live with going out in public with you and hearing the gossip, the innuendo, the CRAP!" Dee was in tears again and physically shaking and feeling so totally isolated. Joey had become so tuned into Dee that he realized this immediately and took her in his arms and held her, and for a minute, enveloped by his arms, his wonderful scent, his solidity, Dee remembered what they shared. And she didn't want to lose that. Her heart was in his hands; she was confused but she wasn't ready to let go. "You know what Deeds? I'm going to give you as long as it takes to realize that I love you too, that I'm not going to let you run away, that you and I are going to make it together in spite of all the chaos going on around us. Maybe it's selfish of me not to let you go. But I want you with me, I want you to love me and I want to love you. All this pandemonium around us is only a small portion of who I am and what I am. And it's temporary. It won't go on forever. But what will go on forever is our love for each other, if we let it grow and don't let anything inside to tear us apart." "Joey, you know that's what I want. I'm just going to need you to help me. I'm going to need you to reassure me. And above all, I'm going to need you to be honest with me……about everything." Joey understood what she wanted to know. "I won't lie to you, Deeds. I'm a flirt. An incurable flirt. I love women…." Dee pulled back from Joey and looked at him with trepidation. She was afraid she wasn't going to like what she was about to hear. "But that's as far as it goes, Dee. I'm not a complete lout. Maybe it's risky leading women on in order to have a little fun. Maybe it's not smart to put myself in the position to have women think they have a 'chance' with me because I've toyed with them. And now I realize just how dangerous it can be when I've found a woman I want to spend time with and love." Dee wrapped herself tight up in Joey's arms; she could look into his eyes and see that he was telling her the truth. "Ok Joey, my heart will follow if your heart will lead." And indeed, he had learned his lesson and he had given his heart to Dee at that moment almost ten years ago. "Hey, where were you?" Dee asked, leaning over and putting her hand on Joey's arm, bringing him back to the present. "You're brow was furrowed deep enough to sow a row of corn!" "Ah…….memories of times past," he said, smiling. "You know, that stuff you do when you get to be middle-aged," he joked. Their conversation was interrupted by gales of laughter and screams coming from a pile of kids underneath the magnolia tree, punctuated by a distinctive deep voice coming from beneath them crying for help. Chapter Three Home |