And You Thought Your Life Was Over

Janine sat in her Boss’s office that last day of work for the Millennium admiring the décor. What else could she do? He had asked her to wait for her in his office, saying that he had something important to tell her so as she wondered what it was, she busied her eyes with the numerous fixtures and portraits on his desk. Just as she was about to laugh at a portrait of a woman that might have been his wife in a ludicrous multi-colored headgear, her boss walked in. 

“Hey, Miss Janine. Sorry to keep you waiting.” He said as he burled into the office, panting. His voice was choky, and scratchy. He was a burly set man, with a small bald head and a protruding pot belly that made his shirt hang out half the time.

“Hey, What’s this all about, Sir? You know it’s New Years’ eve today?”

“Yeah, I’m aware of that. And as much as it hurts me that this is such a special occasion today, work has asked me to do this.” He heaved into his seat like a bear, forcing himself to fit into it. Janine was certain she could hear the chair whimper in pain. “I have to let you go. Your work…its getting sloppy, it’s like you’re here but you don’t really want to be here. You come in late, you don’t talk to anybody. It’s just...it’s pathetic. I’m sorry.”

Those words hit a nerve in Janine's turgid heart. Her work wasn't getting sloppy, it was her attitude, her nonchalance to their useless office chit chat, and her antisocial composure, rejecting their advances towards her. She knew they hated it, that they absolutely thought of her as a snob, but she had no idea they would hate it enough to fire her.

She tried to avoid his gaze, turning to stare at the wall as she fought back the tears from her eyes. He mustn’t see me hurt; he mustn’t, she resolved inside her.

She heaved a sigh. “Okay, sure. I’ll get my stuff out.” She got up slowly from the chair, as her legs felt so heavy.

“No, it’s okay. You can get them out in the New Year. There's really no hurry,” he said courteously, fighting back a sinister smirk.

“No, I said I’ll get them out now.” Janine emphasized. “I wouldn’t want to come back here in the New Year, not ever. Thanks but no thanks.”

Janine avoided the stare of her co-workers as she packed up her little bag. She didn’t have much to pack up anyway. Unlike the others she didn’t have family pictures or memorabilia, ridiculous or not, to place on her desk. She just had an address book and a paper weight she had been given last Xmas by a former acquaintance; funny thing was that she couldn't as much as remember who it was exactly that gave it to her, all she did remember was that she had liked it so much as to want to keep it. Everything on her desk fit into a little back-pack, and she hurled it across her shoulder and made the brave walk out of the office.

  “That’s it,” she murmured to herself. The lady across from her cubicle attempted to smile at her but Janine turned her face away from her quickly before the lady could utter a word or muster a smile. They mustn’t see me cry, they mustn’t; she said again.

 

With slow and heavy steps, she made her way to the elevator, shunting every eye that came her way, with a death glare, and a twisted frown on her mouth. She could tell that they were glad or possibly delighted: this might have been their idea after all. They never liked her, they never approved of her private, reclusive lifestyle. It was not her fault she chose not to share her hours gossiping about who is dating the new guy in the mail department or what the new intern was wearing. She wanted to be alone by her self, quiet and still to sort out her thoughts--which were many---and her life---which was in a sham; 28 and unmarried, working for a small time insurance company for a measly sum, and no job satisfaction whatsoever, were not exactly how she saw her self spending her days on this earth. She had dreams and aspirations which had gone unfulfilled due to one unforeseen mishap or the other, and she had a candle in her heart that burned a hole in it much rather than it glowed.

Something inside her had warned her to avoid coming to work today altogether, but her hardworking officious nature wouldn't hear of a flippant day off work. Now, she had lost that dedicated job...that may have paid just enough for a measly apartment but still gave her a sense of belonging which she really needed. 

 

Inside the elevator, on her way down, with a few floors gone, a young man stepped in to join her. Janine didn’t look up at his face, her head was bent down to conceal her swollen eyes, swollen from holding back the tears that were stinging to let out.

 

“Hey,” he said. His voice calm and warm like a soothing ointment. “Hey, is there something wrong, young lady?” He asked in the most gentlemanly voice.

 

Janine sniffed, and lifted her head but avoided looking at him. She was too ashamed to let whoever it was see her in tears, breaking down in public, all because of what, because she had lost the one thing that inspired her to get up in the mornings. “What makes you think there is something wrong?” she muttered.

 

“Because, it’s either you’re having as rotten a day as I am, or some of my bad luck seems to be rubbing off on you”. He smiled a winning one that ran across his face, lighting up the dense mood of the elevator.

This comment brought a smile to Janine's face. There was nothing better than finding out someone out there was feeling just as rotten as you were. It gave you a sense of comfort and inner consolation that your mind was vaguely intact in all life's craziness.

“I’m fine.” Janine sniffed again. This time she turned her face to look straight at his. She knew who he was. His face looked vaguely familiar, but if he was who she thought, what was he doing in her office building on New Year's eve?

“Hi, I’m Matt. Matt Damon.” He brought out his hand for a handshake.

She was right. It was him. “I’m Janine.”  She wiped off the tears from her face, hurriedly. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Are you sure about that? I haven’t heard that in a while,” he joked.

“It is. It’s a pleasant surprise,” she blurted.

Just then, the elevator door opened up. They had reached the ground floor.

“Well, I have to go,” Janine said, politely.

“Oh, I see...ahem…would you like to have a cup of coffee with me. There’s a Starbucks right across the street.”

“I know," Janine muttered.

“Oh you do...What do you think? Shall we? I’ll get that bag for you.” Matt grabbed the bag from Janine’s hands before she could register her protest to his coffee invite.

“Alright then," Janine said agreeing. "How come you know this neighborhood so well?”

“I come here often. Quite often.” He smiled at Janine again, unrelenting in his charms.

Janine shrugged. He does, what in the world would he be doing in this part of town, how come I had never met up with him before?

Inside the café, he had ordered a cappuccino for Janine and a double espresso for himself.

“You don’t say much do you?” Matt asked, beaming a smile across at Janine's scowl which she had brought out with her from the office. She had this pensive calm that aroused Matt's interest. Her face looked like it bore many thoughts but her mouth kept those thoughts shielded and locked up inside her, echoing them in the lines of her pretty forehead. The waiter brought their coffee and placed it carefully on the tables, ignoring Matt's status in an effort to force some normalcy into his presence, nothing worse than bothering a celebrity for something unwarranted when he is out with a female.

“Oh, I do. I just haven’t found the right person to say them to. But when I start I can’t stop.”

“What gets you started?” He urged.

“I don’t know, anything.”

“Okay then. Anything.” Matt blurted out the word like it was some kind of password to unlocking the vault of free-flowing uninhibited dialogue.

Janine rolled her eyes at his incredulity. “That’s not really what I meant." She stirred her the liquid in her cup by shaking the cup side to side. The dark lava reflected her mood, tired and heavy. She noticed her companion was watching her attentively as she did so, so she offered up some more words to imply that she was still sane, though hanging by a thread. "I’m not really having a very good day today, that’s all. Ever have those kinda of days?”

“Of course it’s called acting. Trying to be someone else you’re whole life. It’s pathetic.” He hissed, taking a small sip of his coffee to smooth his parched lips.

“But you make a lot of money from it. Try doing what I do. I’m a claims agent for that insurance firm on the 17th floor, how boring can that be? My boss is like a size 100, and then I have snoopy co-workers who have nothing better to do than discuss the status of my love life. A job that terrible you’d think I’ll be glad to lose it.”

“Why, what happened?” he asked concerned, the lines forming folds now on Janine's subtle face...a touchy subject must have come up.

“I just got fired. Who the hell fires someone on New Years Eve?” she said full of anguish.

“A size 100 boss that’s who.” He finished on a lighter note.

“Exactly. My sentiments too." Janine replied, unconsciously warming up to this well known stranger. "Anyway, it’s goodbye to the lot of them. That’s one load lifted from my shoulders.” Janine drained her cup like it was not filled with steaming coffee. “Can I leave now?”  she asked, rudely.

“Why don’t I get you another?” He beckoned the waiter and immediately her cup was refilled, no questions asked, talk about fast efficient service. “Can I ask you a question?” Matt peered into Janine's dark brown eyes.

Janine nodded, rolling her eyes, as she asked inside her: do I really have a choice?

“Why are you so…hostile? Like you’re angry or something?”

She pursed her lips at him, and began in a modulated outrage, “I said I lost my job. Haven’t you been listening to me?”

“But you never really liked the job?”

“Yeah, but I lost it either way. Isn’t that shitty enough? How can you lose a job you don't like? To top it off on New Years Eve like they couldn’t wait to get rid of me. Oh, how dare they enter the New Millennium with sour puss Janine.” Janine’s voice suddenly filled the quiet café alerting the other customers to the temperature of their conversation.

Matt looked around at the other customers who were now staring at their table. He gave them a stern look that got them to instantly turn away, muttering slight apologies for their visual intrusion.

 

“Can I say something else?” He asked a furious Janine.

“Yes, you always do, so why bother asking. Yes Mr. Damon you may say something.” Janine’s nostrils flared.

 

“Okay. I think the real reason they fired you was because you were not happy being there, you didn’t want to be a part of them so why keep you there, like you were doing them a favor or something. Co-workers have feelings too you know. And as to your boss, he may be a size 2000, but he is still your boss. You have just one boss to deal with. Some people have a lot of bosses everyday of their jobs. With every movie I work on, I have a different boss, with a different temperament and a different approach. Try dealing with that and see how far it takes you. Life is hard and its crummy. But you learn to deal with it, and deal hands that would favor you one way or another. So face it instead of shutting everyone out.” Matt sat back in his chair and folded his hands waiting for Janine’s lacerating tongue to start its engine.

 

He watched her take deep breaths, construing what to make of his strong personal submission. He did make sense in more ways than he knew it, it was just that it wasn't always that simple for Janine, she had complexities inside her that hindered her smooth interaction with other people be them her co-workers, classmates, and of course loved ones. She didn't know why she had these reservations inside her, she just had them; they formed an intricate part of her, of who Janine really was, and she knew to change them or let go of them might take away form her a lot more than a conscious effort.

 “I’m sorry. I guess I over-reacted a little." she apologized, wiping the pressure points on her forehead. "I’m sorry. I told you I talk a lot.” Janine reached forward and rubbed on his arms that were still folded across his chest. “So, shall we start again. I’m Janine. Tall, black hair, brown eyes, wonderful smile...like to read, swim, watch sitcoms, date a little...” she cheered, running her statistics by him like he was a matchmaking data base.

 

Matt forced a smile. “I’m Matt.” He moved forward and leaned on the table. “So what are your plans for New Years?”

“I don’t know. Probably sit in my house and count the stars or something. Order some Chinese and watch the fireworks from my bedroom window."

“Wow…That sounds so exciting. I wish I could do something so fascinating,” he said in sarcasm. “Are you always like this?”

“If you mean, depressed. Yes. It comes in my manual. Janine--—the depressed young lady. Didn't I just mention that just now...oher...thought I did.”

“It’s a shame.” He shook his head.

“I know I could have turned out to be a nice young lady, right?” Janine joked. “Tell me, really what were you doing in my building?”

“It’s mine. I just bought it. Thinking of tearing it down to build a children’s center of some kind,” Matt said casually of owning a multi-million dollar complex.

“You’re kidding?” Janine astonished, gasping for air. Matt shook his head. “So are you gonna tear it down?” Janine eyes lit up with a flicker of revenge. The thought of evicting her co-workers out into the street like they had done to her a few minutes ago intrigued her.

“Maybe, maybe not. It depends on how many failed businesses there are in it. If the businesses can relocate, fine. I’ll tear it down. If they can't...I don't know...seems like a long short....What do you think I should do?” Matt said nonchalantly.

“You want my honest opinion?” Janine asked matter-of-factly. he should know by now that her ideas are as irrational as they come, so why would he want to consort with her on a delicate business venture  such as these.

“Yeah, is there any other kind?” Matt replied.

Janine searched her mind. Throwing them out seemed like a good option, sending them away like sheep without a shepherd, having them cater to a new location, inch to make new contacts, and lose some staff too in the tedious process. However, it would be revenge, bittersweet revenge, hard luck revenge, and that would be too easy. Revenge would come when it is supposed to for them. Somehow she had to believe that it would. “Well, I think you should do whatever your mind tells you. You’re the boss, right? So do whatever.”

Janine smiled at him for the first time that afternoon, and it let their eyes meet in a matching complex grip. And as they shared a brief, twinkling moment in that café the rest of the world was outside busying itself with plans to break into the Millennium.  Somehow, something had made sense to Janine; their chance meeting, the likelihood that she would bump into him today of all days, the eve of the anticipated Millennium; a day she had written off as a horrid one, and a day among many in which he had frequented her building countless times without brushing past Janine in any way, manner or form; a day that neither one of them could dictate how the ships would pass or the dawn would break; a normal configured day. It was just sheer random magic that led them to meet and discover this afternoon together, and that magic led him to convey things to her that no one else had been brave enough to, or maybe had but she was just too confined in her own spacious world to want to listen.

“I’ll like to have dinner with you tonight. Would you like that?” Matt asked not taking his eyes away from Janine’s.

“You didn’t have to ask. I’d love to. Really.” Janine replied, choking with an uneasy feeling of awe.

“Or we could spend the rest of the day together and have dinner afterwards? Do you have any plans?”

“Hey, I’m the one that just got fired remember, what possible plans could I have for the day,” Janine smirked.

“I don’t know, you might wanna go strangle your boss or something?” Matt teased.

“Me? Please. My hands wouldn’t even go round his neck. You should see the size of it.” Janine pulled out her chair as she got up.

“I know, I know, size 100, you’ve said that a hundred times today.” Matt pulled out her chair for her, courteously.

“So, what’s upsetting you?”

"What?" Matt asked, confused.

“When I saw you in the elevator you said you were having a rotten day, what is it?”  Janine asked, concerned.

“Oh, that." he scratched his head. The flimsy thought an into it immediately. "Oh, my friend Ben called said he can’t make it for New Years, said he has work to do. How rotten is that? We haven’t spent a New Year apart for about 7 or 8 years.”  Matt said biting his lower lip, as they were out the door. He was deeply hurt by Ben's refusal to spend the day with him...but it was one of those occupational hazards that their jobs carried: be a rich celebrity but have to spend holidays away from your loved ones. It sucked, especially when he was the one on the receiving end.

“Get outta here. Really? That’s weird for guys to be tight friends like that. Sure you guys are not gay?” Janine teased.

“Nope, not the last time I checked. He’s my best friend, almost like family. We’ve been through every kind of thing together. And when you have a friend like that, you have to be together at a time like New Years’, don’t you think?”

Janine nodded comprehensively like she just heard the solution to a riddle. the truth of the matter was that she hadn’t spoken to her family or any of her childhood friends in over 3 years. They had had a simple argument over something she couldn't even remember and that was it, final goodbye, the last time they either heard or spoke to each other. Any other forms of communication had been ignored by either party, and Janine was not one to go out of her way to make amends if the opposing party was not eager for peace why did she have to be. That was a bad trait of hers she had always tried to shirk, one amongst many...making peace with her. She often said, if she ever worked for the United Nations peace making processes would be the hardest part, and most impossible parts of her job. Matt’s words made her think of them now. The playful New years she used to spend with them, the family gathering over a huge ice cream cake marked with the numbers of the coming year, and the toast accompanied with a small prayer the eldest member would give just before they dug in hand and foot into the cake, at times smudging it all over each other. No doubt she had happy times in her past...where had all those times gone...where? they had gone along with her smile, her sanity, her childish sense of freedom. For awhile, they, like Matt and Ben... couldn't spend New Years away from each other, they always had to find a means to convene by all means necessary, dragging an unwilling party by the ears to get them to the designated venue of that years celebration. Those times were like history recitals to her now...so much in the past.

“Hey, you know what. I think I do have plans for the day.” Janine turned to Matt, suddenly as they walked along the way.

“What, what is it?” Matt stopped on the road to listen to her.

“I…I…have to go... have to go see my family. Might as well do that today, right? I haven’t spoken to them in 3 years. We had some kind of stupid argument over something I can’t even remember now. I’m sure they’ll be surprised to see me. You wanna come along, help me say hi to them?”

He shut his eyes briefly as he resolved to help this troubled lady make amends with the forces that kept her somber. “Yeah...yeah. I’ll do that. That would be nice. Comon, where do they live?”

“Not far from here actually, my brother stays a couple of blocks from here. he'll know where the New Years party is at this year.” 

They continued to walk, briskly along the narrow foot path heading to his car, Janine's hands linked into his, as her heart felt enthusiastic with having to confront her past, with a glimpse of her future.

“Not far from here and you haven’t gone to see them. Wow! Maybe the building that should be torn down is you?” He tapped the tip of her nose, playfully.

Janine laughed, tugging his arm tighter as they walked to her home that afternoon.

That day Matt escorted her to make peace with her family. They ended up having lunch with them at her brother's house, along with her four brothers, two sisters and 4 nieces and nephews. The party celebration was kicked up a notch when they eyed their youngest, formerly estranged, sister in the arms of a famous well-known face in the entertainment business; all through dinner her brothers couldn't help teasing her about him, certain that he was the reason why she stayed away from them for so long. 

After that, they made a one hour phone call to Ben, had late supper snack and spent the night together, welcoming the New Year as a couple. Somehow, they haven’t spent a day apart ever since.

 

 THE END.

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