"Ally…. What's wrong?….."

Ally raised her head and whispered weakly:

"Renee….Hey…."

"Do you miss him?…" Her best friend asked her, as she was trying to guess what was in her mind.

"No…um…no I mean that is pretty much a given but it's…I..I'm pregnant…"

Renee remained silent for a while but then she started to yell:

"Excuse me…. But what are you?…12?… You're totally irresponsible or what?…"

"Please,don't start acting like my mom! It's the last thing I need right now…" Ally managed to answer, with tears in her voice.

"Are you gonna keep it?" Renee asked, a moment later.

Ally looked at her with a shy smile.

"I don't know about the name, though…"

"Well…let's see…Baby …Paul. Baby Paul. BabyPaul ! Sounds great !"

"I think it would be Baby Mc Beal."

"…What?… You won't tell him?"

"We're not together anymore! And I don't want him to see my child once a year! He told me before he couldn't have a successful relationship with anyone, isn't it clear enough?"

"He's the father of your baby… you have to tell him!"

"I promess… I'll think about it."

They hugged tenderly. For the first time since Larry was gone, Ally was feeling happy. She knew what she wanted and was determined to enjoy her pregnancy.

Four months later…

All the members of her office were glad about her pregnancy and they were all taking care of her (even Nelle and Ling seemed happy). At Cage & Fish, it was time for the staff-meeting:

"First up…" Richard began. "Ally would like to tell you something…"

"Uh…uh..yes. Even if this is none of your concern (she shot a look at Ling), I'm now six months pregnant and… it…it's a baby girl…so if I'm a little heedless these days…" Ally stopped when she saw Richard staring at her belly. "Move along Richard !" She added nervously.

"Hmmm…I like that !… Oh hey, Ally, since we're talking about you…can you handle a case?"

"Well…Richard, I'm pregnant, not sick !" Ally shot back, getting angry.

"O-Okay…Fine…John, why don't you tell us what this case is about?"

"Actually, it's about birth control. Ally,you'll have to defend Elizabeth Ross. Her husband, Sebastian Ross is suing her because she told him she was tacking pills while she wasn't. She's now pregnant, she wants to have the baby but her husband doesn't; he thinks he has been duped. Since you're a little concerned…"

"Thanks…John…"Ally said,feeling insecure. "I-I'll take it."

"Ally…there's something else you should know …there's a new lawyer in town, it is said that she's really good. Kelly Sallen is the lawyer you 'll be against in court.."

"Is she pretty?" Richard interrupted him.

"We don't care if she's pretty or not. Why the hell does everybody think that being pretty in court is so important? It's not because she's pretty that she'll win!" Ally replied ,talking really fast.

"Don't forget to breath. It would be nice for your baby to catch some air…" Nelle added, murmuring.

"Okay,fine." Ally said, raising up to leave the room.

"Maybe you need help…" Ling proposed snappishly.

Ally didn't even turn around, her eyes filled with tears, peaking against her "damn hormones", she closed her office's door. Although her pregnancy was bringing her happiness, she was feeling insecured by her new body shape. Ling's and Nelle's evil thoughts didn't make it easier.But suddently, she felt something moving inside of her:something… or someone. She smiled and laughed:her baby girl had found a way to cheer her up. She touched her belly and rubbed it softly: "I love you"She simply said.

As she was sitting down in her office the following day, Richard came in:

"What…again…Richard? Whatever it is, it's not my fault… I just got here!"

"Oh…well…just wanted to tell you that the other lawyer doesn't want to go to court anymore…and she's hoping you'll agree to have a meeting in the conference room."

"Oh…sure. It's okay." Ally replied distractively.

"She's here" Richard added.

"What do you mean she's here ?... Kelly Sallen is here?"

"Yes. Let me introduce you to her !"

In the conference room, Ally first saw a gorgeous woman who was standing in front of the window, but when she turned around and smiled at her, she had the feeling she had met her before:

"Okay... So... Ally, this is Kelly Sallen. Kelly Sallen, Ally Mc Beal."

"You're Ally Mc Beal ?"

"That would be correct…"

"Would you …uh….mind if I talk to you in private…Ally?"

"No…We could…go to my…um…office…"

They both headed for Ally's office. She was feeling a little nervous, since Kelly couldn't help walking back and forth in the room:

Finally, she began to speak

"You're …uh…pregnant…"

"That's right…Is everything okay?"

"Actually…it's not okay…" Kelly replied softly, looking at her with empty eyes. "Alright, I'm just gonna say it…My name is Kelly."

"I know that…Richard already told me…"

"Just…let me finish.I married Josh Sallen 3 years ago…but my birth name is Kelly…Kelly Paul."

"Kelly…Paul. Kelly Paul. Kelly Paul ! Damn-damn …damn it ! The Paul thing again. Who the hell are you?"

"His sister. Larry's little sister."

"What are you doing here? Don't you think it's hard enough to…"

"I didn't know. I swear I did not.I…" Kelly stopped, as tears were falling on Ally's cheeks. She smiled at her through her tears:

"Gee…hormones…… Your face seemed familiar…now I know why…"

"I-I'm sorry. Does he know he's the father of your baby?"

"How do you know he's…"

"He told me about you. It just couldn't be any other way. Just hearing him talk about you,….even from a distance…I-I managed to get jealous of you…"

"Oh-um…really?"Ally tossed and added this time sternly. "But I don't, I really don't want to talk about …him .It just hurts too much and I-I…"

There was some pause in which all could be heard was Ally's soft breathing to regain composure, until Kelly added softly:

"He's not a bad guy, Ally…"

"I know that…but see, there are still things that I can't understand, nor excuse, and cheating and note-leavings happen to be on the list."

"How about pre-weddings panic? Do you even know what it's like?"

"What?…"Ally gasped, her mouth wide-opened.

"He didn't tell you…? Boy,he can be such an ass!" Kelly exclaimed, hiding a laugh. As they looked at each other, Ally bursted out laughing:

"Yeah…I've noticed…"

"Ally ..." Kelly began,getting serious again... "believe me or not…and don't get me wrong,okay?... But...I...think...you...should tell him... "

"It...um...would be too complicated anyway ... He was in a lot of pain and...I don't want him to have the feeling he failed again..."

"I understand... I understand...but...um...will I get to see your baby someday...?"

"Oh...um...of course!...I mean...uh...I'll need you to tell her about her father..."

"It's a girl...!" Kelly exclaimed, a big smile on her face.

As they were holding hands, like they knew each other forever, talking about Ally & Larry's baby girl, Ally realised she had found a new friend .

Three months later, Ally was giving birth to her baby.

In Ally's room at the hospital:

Renee opened the door quietly, the first thing she saw was Ally with a big smile on her face, holding her baby in her arms. She didn't even notice Renee was in.

"Ally..."

"Oh Renee ...hey..."

"Wow, you look amazing. How's the little girl doing?

"Um,well... Lara is fine" Ally said proudly.

"What about you?"

"I...I'm okay..."

"So...Lara...it remind of ..."

"Yeah...it sure does..."

Renee's face changed suddently.

"Let me see this little girl..."

Renee came closer to the baby.

"Oh...wow...such beautiful eyes...and ...look at her hair ...she has your smile but...she looks like someone else too...it will be hard for you ...when you'll look at her not to think about ...Larry"

"Yeah…she's so beautiful…I wish he could have been there…but-um…she's got me and you and a wonderful aunt, caring grandparents… we're gonna see from there and see what unfolds…"

"You two will overcome this, Ally…"

"I know I will…anyway,I would like to talk to you about something. See, I already consider this situation as awkward, you know, she'll have to grow up without her father, so, I would like to make it seem the most normal as possible...and…um..." She took a deep breath and added "you and me…living together...is..."

"It's fine...I know what you mean…and I totally agree… it is important for you and her to have a place on your own..."

"Are you sure?..."

Renee came closer to her and took her hand in hers. She smiled and said softly:

"Of course I am…I'm your best friend or what?"

"That, you are, without a doubt!"

"Good, then…" She pouted and added "And will I be Lara's favourite aunt's?"

"Well, sure, unless you don't teach her how to knock out guys…" Ally stopped as she saw Renee grin.

"Kidding…Of course you'll be ! Thank you for being here, it really means a lot to me." She added a moment later.

"It's okay... And don't worry for the "moving in thing". I'll find you two a place ..." She looked at Ally and said, smiling : "You'll have the greatest appartment ... as soon as you'll get out of the hospital, what do you make of that ?"

Ally smiled and agreed. She grabbed Lara's left hand like she was waving at her friend.

"Thank you auntie Renee !"

When Ally entered in her new appartment, tears started to fill her eyes: Renee had made their new place perfectly decorated and her piano has been settled next to the fire place. Renee had tried to reproduce their previous appartment, but there was more rooms. Ally hugged tightly Lara when she saw a ghastly pink door with her daughter's name on it. She opened it and gasped : the furnitures were pink and Lara's little bed was covered by teddy bears and baby dolls ... all pink. Ally laughed and asked Renee :

"Hey, is anything not pink in that room?"

Renee pretended to ponder until she finally answered, "Hmmm…nope…it is definitely a girl's bedroom!"

"Damn right!…"

The bell door suddently rang. As Renee was opening the door, Kelly's head popped from outside:

"Hey, can we come in?"

Ally looked at her puzzled.

"We?"

"Um, yeah…I've brought you some friends who were dying to see you…"

The entire firm of Cage & Fish was here, and this was more than Ally could take. With a tear-stained face, she introduced her baby to the gang.

"She's so beautiful. Can I hold her?"

"Sure. Go ahead, Richard." Something hit her mind as she slid Lara in Richard's arms. "But don't even think of fingering my daughter's wattle!"

"Oh,that. I would never. Scout's honor!"

Renee lightly tapped her shoulder.

"You know, the reason why everything is so perfect, is because everyone chipped in a bit."

"Really?…Everyone?"

"Yeah…I think it's probably a way to tell you that you're not alone...not now and not ever…"

Ally simply nodded. Truth be told, she had been freaking out a little lately, not knowing what was going to happen next .But now that she knew her friends would be part of the 'next', she was feeling relieved, protected, loved…and ultimately…happy.

Four years later…

So,I'm a mom.Wow! Who would have guessed? Every day, she's the reason I wake up, and she's growing up so fast…it's incredible…She reminds me of Larry in so many ways that it can get rather painful sometimes.I have like… a bunch of people helping me out-except the one I really need-and Lara is very well surrounded. Kelly's very concerned about her,and she became one of my best friends as well.The thing I like the most about her is the way she talks to Lara about her dad.The Cage& Fish workplace atmosphere has noticeably softened since Lara's birth.When her babysitter's ill,I take my girl to my office,where she seems perfectly content,since she has about 6 babysitters watching over her all day.I think that's why she's so delighted when I tell her she's coming to work with me .Anyway, Lara is now 4 years old and she's beginning to get quite nosy about her dad and my relationship with him.

I guess her curiousity started on Christmas time.You know that there are some days when you feel that every thing is going the wrong way,but you can't do anything to change it well, this is exactly how I felt this morning.I had been assigned to this very big case against a mean and vicious lawyer -a 25 years old full of confidence blond bitch should I add - who seemed to know my bio more than I did and who took a slight pleasure of reminding it to me in the middle of a trail calling me " single working mother with psychological desorders" (thankyouverymuch…) Anyway, I had the feeling things couldn't get worse….once again I was wrong…So,Lara and I were having breakfast together,sitting in front of each other and ,well,just by looking at her,I could clear my head of all the negatives thoughts flying through my mind(kill opposite counsel for example…);truth be told,I was fascinated by this little being who became so fast this tall and gangly thing who could eat like …5 toasts in the morning and still be hungry after.

She caught me looking at her and smiled:

"What?…" She mumbled, with a sleepy voice.

"Nothing…" I put my head back in my coffee, hiding a smile.

"Mom?"

] uh -oh,wide awake now

"Yeah? …"

"You know about Ashley, right?"

"Of course I do, she's your best friend, isn't she?"

"Yup!… well, she told me she went with her dad to circus act for her birthday present."

"And?…"

"So I was wondering…what's a dad like?"

I let my spoon fall in my coffee. I didn't even care if it was spread on the table. I was totally paralysed and all I could think of was 'Oh…my…god…!!!!'

"Lara… I-I don't want to have this kind of discussion with you…"

"Uh-uh … And could you tell me why?"

"Well, because."

She rolled her eyes at me

"You're not getting of this easily."

"Look, sweetie…Kelly talks to you about him,does she?"

"Yeah, great. I know his name, his job, his childhood, but I-I…I want to know him, what it feels like to be with him. I want…my… dad ."

"We're goin'to be late for school."

"Mom?….Why don't you and Jackson get along?"

"Sorry?"

"Well, till my dad shows up, he could be my dad-substratum."

"First, I don't think this word exists. It's substitute. Second,…come here…"

I lowered on my knees and pretend fixing her clothes, staring at her dark brown eyes, trying not to notice the pout on her face: "You …have a dad,sweetie …and you only get to have one…"

"But he's never here. It's like he evaporated in thin air or something. Jackson always listens to me when I have issues at school, he plays with me …Ashley says that's what dads do."

How the hell can I reply to that? (Dammit Larry…)

"Okay. Let's go. We'll try to see Jackson tomorrow in court and we'll talk about this later."

She didn't answer me back, but she let me hold her hand.As I was leaning over to kiss her little forehead, I squeezed her hand softly. When I saw her eyes, my heart broke into a thousand pieces .I wondered if I had made the right decision. Maybe not telling Larry about her was a huge mistake ...

"Mom ! Mom !" Lara said trying to take a sleepy Ally out of bed .

"It's today !!!" She screamed.

"W...What ?"

"Well, you've promised I'll see Jackson today so ... so let's go ! "

Ally didn't seem decided so Lara got in her bed and started to tickle her. They bursted out laughing as Ally was trying to escape from her grasp. Ally pushed Lara to her back and rolled on top of her :

"Alright...you…little brat…don't even think of tickling me once again …"

"You wanna bet ?" Lara warned, trying to free one of her hands.

"T-t-t-tut...NO...j-j-just...no...no..."

Ally looked in her eyes and kissed her nose, sliding a hand in her hair:

"How 'bout a morning hug instead ?

" Lara grinned and smiled "Deal !"

Her mother opened her arms and hugged her tight as Lara cuddled her body against Ally's and remained still…but only for a minute …

Ally and Lara entered in court. Lara squinted her eyes so she could see from a long distance when Jackson would appear.Suddently,she saw him standing in the doorway. She let her mother's hand go and ran to him:

"Jackson" She yelled.

"Hey Lara…what's up lady?"

"Fine. How's Ling?"

"She's okay…Though I think she's a little jealous of you"

"Well,good. I'm delighted"

"Anyway, what are you doing here?" Jackson asked

"She wanted to see you, that's all…I hope you're not too busy" Ally replied, a scowl on her face.

"Of course not! Come here squirt" Jackson said, taking Lara in his arms.

Ally couldn't stand this view of Lara and Jackson holding each other and looked away. That's when she saw John, standing in the court alley, waving at her:

"Jackson ,would you mind watching over Lara for a second?"

"Sure, no problem … Goodbye mom!" He answered back.

"Funny,as ever" Ally thought. "Lara, be nice!"

"I will."

As Ally made her way to John, she had the feeling something was wrong. John seemed extremely nervous.

"John, are you okay? You don't look at ease."

"Well, you'll never guess with whom I'm against in court !"

"Did Mr "I'm not ... comfortable" or "I'm not ... clear" piss you off ?"

"Mr Milter ... oh no ... it's not him. It's ... "

"Hi" An oh-so-known voice to Ally, said, interrupting them.

Ally turned around and almost fainted. Larry was standing here, with his handsome looking and his black glasses, looking at her and waiting for a reply. She just felt like someone had punched her right in her stomach.She couldn't breath anymore,and it seems like the emotions she had spent so much time to erase, came right back at the sight of him. She took a deep breath and managed to answer:

"Uh...uh...hello" Ally said slowly. "What are you doing ...uh...here ?"

"Well... I'm back...in Boston for this big case,the client needs me in town for whatever reason,so…"He paused and said softly "I can see you're doing great."

"Ally..I'll leave you two alone.." John whispered, heading into the court room.

Ally didn't even pay attention to John. All she could think of was Larry Larry Larry… Something suddently hit her mind:

"How's Sam?"

"He's fine. He is ... in vacation with...his mum..." Larry would have smiled at the look on Ally's face cringing at the mention of Jamie's name if he hadn't been so nervous.

"Well...that's...terrific..." She smiled shyly and bowed her head, looking at the floor, swinging nervously on her feet. Suddently, she heard someone yell.Her eyes widened as she whipped around quickly.

"Mom!"

As Ally recognized Lara's voice, she totally freaked out. This is it.She thought . I'm gonna die today.

Lara wrapped her arms around her mother's leg and looked at Larry shyly.

"Hey mom, missed you!"

"Oh ,right, don't mother me right now. Look, i'm really mad at you. I told you to behave, I told you to be quiet, and what do you do? Running in the alley, plowing down pedestrians, yelling like crazy…"

"Sorry mom ...I won't do it again...promess..."

"Mom...it's...it's...you're...a...mom..." Larry said interrupting her.

Ally laughed nervously as Larry was looking Lara, back and forth.

Suddenly, Lara's little voice said softly.

"Wait ...mom..who...who is that guy?"

"Well...um...sweetie...Mr Paul's a lawyer...I was...against once..." Ally mumbled.

"And...Mr Paul...this is my daughter." Ally said, gazing in his eyes.

Lara, who was staying behind her mother, grabbing her leg, made her way in front of her and stood between Ally and Larry. He kneeled down with a sweet smile. Ally felt something strange was happening : Larry and Lara weren't saying anything, they were just looking in each other eyes. Larry stroked Lara's long brown hair - the same as his - and whispered:

"So …you would be the new miss McBeal, huh?"

"Actually, I would."

"And how old are you ?"

"I'm 4." She said, pointing her fingers to him.She paused and added.

"I like your glasses. Can I wear them?"

"Sure." Larry took off his glasses and put them on Lara's nose.

"You look pretty good."

"Really? Mom, do I look good ?"

Ally hold back a laugh when Lara turned over to see her. As Lara was looking back to Larry, he asked her:

"What's your name, baby doll?"

Ally felt dizzy, because she knew he'll find out he was Lara's father just by knowing Lara's name.

"Well." Lara answered "I can't tell you 'coz I'm a spy. And if I do, I'd have to kill you. You don't want to die, do you Mr Paul ?"

"Babe..."Ally said interrupting them. "We really need to go. I forgot to tell Jackson something and you have to go to school."

"But mom! I'm tired. Can you go see Jackson alone? I can stay here…with …him."

"Oh...um…sweetie, I don't think it's a great idea.I mean, Mr Paul has to be busy and all..."

"Well Ally, you know what, it's okay. I only need to be in court in 20 minutes so... Plus, we're already friends, right?"

Lara nodded and looked back at Ally:

"Mom...Please…"

"Okay...Okay...Fine." She looked at larry.

"I'll be back in 5 minutes. You...take care of her okay?"

"I will. And don't worry, I've been through this before."

"Oh...well...I know. Lara, be nice."

Larry looked at Lara while Ally was going.

"How about we'll go sit, since you're tired?"

"Okay." They sat on the alley bench. "But you know, I'm not really tired. I…just wanted to stay with you a little more"

Larry smiled at the soft tone of voice, that was almost ashamed:

"Um, and why is that?"

"Well, you seem nice. And you're a lawyer, like my dad, so you kinda make me think of him." She shook her head and added "Do you have kids?"

"Actually,yes. I have one. He's thirteen."

"And what's his name?"

Larry smirked. "I tell you what:why don't you tell me your name first and I'll tell you his after…"

Lara pondered and bursted out laughing at Larry's face.

"Alright…how'bout a riddle?"

Larry pretended to concentrate, he tilted his head, motionning for her to go ahead.

"I'm ready. Shoot.."

"First clue: i'm in a video game.
Second: I can do kick boxing and I have guns.
And third…i'm a tomb raider"

"It's…you're Lara…Croft?"

"Just Lara" she said.

Larry found himself happy to already be on a chair. It couldn't be real. It couldn't be happening. It simply couldn't.

Lara interrupted him in his thoughts,speaking loud:

"Now you have to tell me his name!"

For the first time in his life, he stuttered:

"Uh...hu...who-whose name?"

"Your son's name of course!"

"Oh…Sam...his name is Sam..."

"You don't see him very often, do you?"

Larry looked at her puzzled:

"How did you know that?"

"Oh,well. Mom says I'm …you know,when you have a gift...i think the word is blain…"

"Blessed" He corrected her gently, a smile forming on his lips.

"Blessed. I just see, when people is sad. It's in their eyes, or in the way they speak when they miss somebody…I just can tell,that's all…The look in your eyes, when you mentionned your son, that's the same that mommy has, whenever I talk about dad…"

Lara gazed deeply at Larry for a long time, like she had the impression he could understand the way she was feeling. She smiled weakly,and shifted nervously. What struck Larry as funny, was that his own feelings didn't even matter to him anymore, because what was important now was different than a few minutes ago. There was just so much hurt and pain in her voice,in her eyes,that it made him want to cry right there in the courtroom. Mostly, it reminded him about Sam. Suing your parents for emotionnal distress at age seven, there has got to be something wrong in your life. Larry looked at her intently, took her hand and held it tightly. It was incredible how his discomfort and nervousness faded away as soon as her hand was in his. Lara's face suddently lit up at the sight of her mother, and she stood up, still holding Larry's hand. He took a deep breath, knowing he was going to have to face Ally again one more time. Larry watched her as she moved towards them smiling. As soon as Larry's stare met Ally's, she stopped halfway abruptly and her face immediatly turned pale. Ally, despite her anxiousness, tried to focuse on Larry's face: strangely, he wasn't so hard to read after all. She bit her lower lip and stared at him as tears began to sting in her eyes. On the other hand, Larry had no doubt anymore, he could feel the tension, the fear, the pain coming out of her body. He studied her for a minute, confused by the mixture of the emotions printed on her face. He came closer, and his eyes burned in hers, as he finally said softly, nearly whispering:

"Lara, huh?"

Ally simply nodded,speechless. She didn't seem to be able to get out one single word, though her thoughts were racing at a high speed. Moreover, she was under the impression that the barrier of tears could easily fall as soon as she would start to speak, and she didn't want to cry in front of Larry. The idea of being weak again, of feeling things were totally out of control made her stiffen. As he was making eye contact again, she suddently panicked and looked away. She took Lara's hand and tugged on her arm slightly. Taking a deep breath, she managed to look at him sternly and let out in a whisper:

"Goodbye"

She whipped around and started walking away.

"Wait!…" Larry called out loud, grabbing her free hand. He didn't want her to go, didn't want her to leave without any explanation. She stared blankly at his hand holding her wrist, and her voice cracked:

"Don't...touch me like that..."A lly started shaking visibly, heavily breathing, obviously shocked. Larry stepped back, stunned to see her react this way at his touch, let go of her hand and lifted up his arms in surrender:

"Okay,okay... ". He raised an eyebrow at her and watched her in disbelief:

"Is that all you have to say?... "

Her face fell and she got angry, her voice rose slightly as she answered agressively:

"Well, isn't it what you do?" She shook her head a little "You know what, I cannot believe..." She bit her lip and closed her eyes briefly, suddently remembering Lara's presence. She lifted her up in her arms, stroking her hair as she was quietly sucking her thumb, carefully listenning to their conversation: "We're late for school." And with that, she left the courtroom. Larry stood there numb, unconscious of what was happening around him. He sat on the bench again, leaned his head back, and sighed, muttering to himself: "I have a daughter"

Ally sat on the couch, replacing distractly the cushions, and brought the blanket up to her waist. She could hear Lara's soft music playing in the background. Somehow, she couldn't fall asleep without hearing it. She took the phone with a sigh and dialed a very familiar number:

"Hello?"

"Hey Kelly, it's Ally, how are you?"

"Hey…I'm fine…I've just finished arguing my case, we settled down this afternoon...what about you, how's the opposite counsel doing?"

Ally laughed softly: "Ah, well, I still didn't get a chance to prove my point so…she's fine, by now"

"Oh please, come on…I'm sure you can come up with something..."

"Yeah, I should definitely do that…"

"So...Lara asleep?"

Ally nodded slowly"Yes...how did you know that?"

"Well, I can hear the music…how is she?"

"She...is doing okay..." Ally smiled slightly, beaming with pride "Her teacher said she was making a lot of progress, that she was really proud of her work… hey, two days ago, she saved a chenille that used to live in the school's garden and put it in her suitcase, because she didn't want her to be alone, and she thought they could become friends...isn't it sweet? The teacher was pretty mad though..."

"Yeah, Lara is ...uh, fairly fabulous...you know when she can act like an adult and in the next second say something appropriate to her own age..."

"Yeah..."

"So where's the bug staying now?"

"Well, what d'you think, at our place, in the kitchen, Lara keeps feeding it with salad and grass,it's unbelievable..." Kelly laughed lightly:

"Your daughter an ecologist..."

"Tell me about it..." Ally stopped joking and let out in a breath "And...I saw Larry today."

There was a quite long pause and Ally panicked, wondering what she could be thinking

"Kelly?..." She called out nervously.

"Yeah….uh, I don't know what to say, actually...what is he doing in Boston anyway?"

"Dunno.I...um, there's worse..."

"Worse?"

Ally looked like she was thinking, as she finally realized what had happened and what it was going to change. Her voice quivered a little as she started to explain:

"Oh, god…We were talking and Lara came along,and…" Tears began to full her eyes "She must have said something, probably, because when I came back, he knew."

Kelly's voice became indignant: "You let him alone with Lara?"

"What was I supposed to do? They were both asking me...don't you think it would have sound a little suspicious if I didn't let him talk with our, I mean my daughter?"

"Well..."

"And you should have seen her face...when she met him..." She took her head in her hands "Oh, she was litterally glowing, Kelly...the way they both connected...it was amazing..."

"Okay, but...what did he say?"

"I-don't-really-remember, you see…I don't know what came over me, but I think I acted rather angrily..."

"Uh-huh..."

Ally rolled her eyes in exasperation "And now what? What is it,what are you thinking? Larry is always doing that too, what, did your mother make you guys rehearse til you could say 'uh-huh' perfectly?"

Kelly raised an eyebrow, waiting patiently for her to stop acting neurotic and cleared her throat at the end of her long sentence. Ally sighed and mumbled slowly "Sorry..."

Kelly chuckled slightly "It's okay...You get the right to be pissed off, you know...as long as it remains occasionate...Sweetheart, uh, I know you're in trouble,right now…and I don't want to bring it all on you, but, do you still…ya know,like...him?"

"What?!?" Her voice was so loud that Kelly had to put away the receiver "How can you ask me that?I mean, do I sound like I'm lusting for him since I saw him this morning..."

"Well, no, but-"

"My concern is about Lara,okay? Not Larry...I didn't even look at him...at all...I was just surprised, that's it. Look,we talked about it at least a hundred of times, and I don't have feelings for him, anymore,you know...well I guess I'll always love him cos he's Lara's father but it has nothing to do with the way I felt about him before, I've changed, I have different priorities and I'm not affected at all, by the fact that he stood in front of me this morning."

"Um, yeah, I can tell...I just found it weird that you started remembering the stuff he used to say,or his habits...but, okay, it's obvious, you don't care about him anymore...my mistake." She bit her lip and added slowly "I'll leave you then, you probably are tired, and, I'll call you tomorrow"

Ally yawned and smiled "Okay then...oh and uh, Kelly?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for listenning..."

"Love you, good night"

"Night."

Kelly hang up and furrows her brow, smirking "She likes him."

Ally got out the Cage and Fish elevator quickly, looking down the floor, not even paying attention to Elaine,who brought her coffee with a mischievous look. Her mind was busy someplace else. Not only meeting Larry for the first time in 5 years had confused her to the highest level, but there was also this nagging and creepy feeling, that he might meet with her again,in the courtroom, in Boston's streets, asking her about Lara. She sighed heavily and headed straight to her office,still staring at her feet:

"Ouch!..."

She knew this would probably happen, bumping into somebody, she just had to remember to look up when she was walking. Unfortunately, she couldn't seem to break herself of this bad habit. She raised her head slowly, a shy look on her face, hoping to mumble some apologizes and get down to work. Her face immediatly turned red and she stared at the person standing in front of her wide-eyed, her mouth hanging opened. Okay, she was psychic enough to know she was going to meet Larry someday, but she certainly didn't expect it to be now.

"Hi…" He said softly, chuckling and rubbing his forehead.

Ally tried to regain some composure by taking a deep breath, and looked at him questionningly, letting him know she was not amused:

"W-What are you ...doing ...here?"

He made a sweet smile and joked again:

"Um, well...you seem to ask me that quite often..."

She kept staring at him puzzled,waiting for a real answer, not those half-sentences he was so fond of. Hopefully, Richard came in. He posed a hand on Larry's shoulder and smiled:

"He works here."

Ally shook her head and bursted out laughing, fidgeting nervously with her mouth

"Uh, that's one's funny..."

Since nobody was laughing back, she calmed down and swallow slowly, trying to keep her voice steady: "What-What do you mean, he works here..."

Richard looked at her like she had grown another head "That ...he works... here. Bygones!" He fled and Ally ran after him quickly, but not after giving Larry a look. He smiled back slightly, apparently not affected.

She slammed Richard's office door, and watched him sit on his chair calmly. He raised his head and looked at her quizically: "What?!..."

"Richard, Larry Paul can't possibly work here..." There was still no reaction from Richard.

"Richard!" She repeated angrily "I work here!..."

"So?...It's not like I was asking you to have sex with him..." Ally rolled her eyes, as he was trying to prove his point "Look Ally, he's good, he makes money, he's in!"

"Yeah, and he also happens to be an ex-boyfriend of mine, eventually the father of my daughter"

"Ally, let me remind you of something...when you first came here, you were Billy's exgirlfriend,right?" He raised his hand to prevent her from talking "Didn't we welcome you correctly, huh? We helped you at this point of your life, when you needed a support, a job, friends, whatever" He seemed surprised when Ally didn't object, for once she was letting him finish. "Larry needed a job, he asked me as a personnal favor." He paused and added "I certainly didn't know what it was, I just offered him the place before another firm hires him."

Ally let herself fall on the couch and started to bite her fingernails. Richard came and sat besides her, with a worried look on his face:

"Does the firm really need him, Richard?" She said in a small voice.

Richard nodded "Absolutely". He hesitated and added softly "And maybe it's not the only one..."

Ally looked into his eyes forlornly:

"I…I…I don't know..."

Richard put a conforting arm around her shoulder. "It's gonna be okay..." He kissed her cheek and smiled at the look on her face: "Now,go get some work done. No need to remind you that time is money…"

Ally smiled weakly and got up, nodding, heading to the conference room. Richard followed her for the staff-meeting. She sat on her chair abruptly, bowing her head down, in order to avoid the stares. When she finally looked up shyly, she found out that everyone was staring at her. She licked her lips and shook her head a little, shooting glares all around her:

"What?..." She asked with obvious anger.

"Um, well...nothing..."John said quickly.

"Yeah, nothing, everything is fine..." Coretta added,nodding slowly.

"Good. Keep it that way then."Ally shot back in a breath.

Nelle shrugged and added in a whisper:

"Great... Larry's back, and here you go all weird again..." Ally tried the Ling glare (not really succeeding…) and growled at her:

"You know, Nelle" She emphazised her name with a fake smile "I've never fought with a girl before..."

"Wow wow wow...girls…Easy,okay?" Richard interfered, trying to calm them down. "We have a ...brotherhood..here."

"Yeah, sure. There." Ally opened his file in a quick move. "New case. Read. First up, next up, moving on…" She mumbled. Richard looked at her stunned and stuttered:

"Um, o-okay. Uh, first, first up...um..." Larry peered out at the door "Good. Ah-um... New comer...Great,Larry ,here is your ,uh, chair..." Larry smiled briefly at him, nodded slightly and mouthed a 'thanks'. Ally crossed her arms and watched him sit in front of her. She rolled her eyes and pretended being absorbed by the file on the desk. However, her resolutions quickly faded away: she couldn't help but staring at him, hiding behind her left hand. Yesterday in court, she was so surprised that she hadn't take time to take a closer look at him. Her eyes wandered on his face, then focused on his lips, his neck...

"Al**leee......" Richard's voice got to be heard.

"Yeah!..." Ally answered back, startled, almost yelling.

"I was just asking...if you don't mind me interrupting you in your thoughts..."and what thoughts"how's your case going?"

"Oh, um, uh...well, it's...you know...tough. I mean, she's uh...quite good. And I…I have this meeting this morning at uh...9...that I'm already dreading..."Ally laughed nervously and raised her head to see Richard, who seemed preoccupied:

"What?…" She asked.

"Um, Ally...hello...it's way past 9..."

"W-what? what?!?" She looked at her watch and stood up in a hurry,knocking out a chair on her way. She almost fell down the floor but managed to stay up, grabbing the desk like it was a lifebuoy. She cleared her throat and whipped around,facing them:

"Gotta go. I'm, uh, late."

Richard indicated her with his hand that she had his permission ot leave. Ally made an apologetic smile and got out of the room running.

Back in Larry's office…

Larry sighed and closed his file. He took off his glasses slowly and blinked. Thinking it was probably the time to take a break, he stood up and headed to the unisex. As he went to open the door, Richard came out and pointed one of the toilets'door, giving him a sympathetic look.Left alone, Larry furrows his brow, hesitating slightly.

"Ally?..." He whispered her name with a soft voice.

Between sniffles, she answered angrily:

"I said...go away…" She cried, her voice breaking. Larry frowned and opened the door, gasping: Ally was sitted on the floor, cuddled up like a ball, her body convulsed by sobs. She lifted up her tear-strained face and seemed surprised to see Larry standing here. She wiped away fastly her tears and stood up briskly, backing away a little.

"You okay?..." He wondered.

Ally smiled sarcastically at the absurdity of his question:

"No, no...I'm not okay at all..." She began pulling at her mouth nervously "I'm tired, I was so lousy in that meeting that all Boston probably already knows what a dope I am, I'm closer than ever to a nervous breakdown... And…" She posed to take a breath and before she could stop them,tears were falling again. She kept crying and could barely get the words out "Everything is so screwed up...whatever I do...the decisions I take...All I say comes out the wrong way, I have the feeling I'm not succeeding... and,and you...I'm angry at you,for walking away on me like that,for...for coming back as if nothing...had happened...and most of all, I hate myself so much right now because...because, despite everything...I missed you. And I don't know... " She was trembling and crying uncontrollably now "What you're going to do,what I should do...or what I want you to do,or... "Her voice broke as she hid her face in her hands, her body shaking slightly.

Larry's POV

I know she's mad at me and she's probably going to push me away like she did yesterday, she hates me so much that she can't even touch me. I know she's in pain and it's all my fault. She looks like she's scared of me, of her feelings...at least,this hasn't change. My body aches to see her like this, I know that she just needs someone to hold onto. I'm impressed by her honesty, and afraid at the same time. I would like to run away..but I can't…Truth is, I missed her too.

Larry came closer to her, softly put his hand at the nape of her neck, guiding her head slowly to his shoulder. She offered no resistance when he took her in his arms and leaned slightly against him, still sobbing.

Open the door
And show me your face tonight
I know it's true
No one heals me like you
And you hold the key

Never again
would I turn away from you
I'm so heavy tonight
But your love is alright
And I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly
You won't give up on me
And I shall believe
I shall believe

He rubbed her back softly to confort her and spoke into her hair:

"Shh...it's okay..." They stayed wrapped up in each other's arms for another few minutes until Ally backed away slowly. She stared at him and sighed:

"I...feel...weird, Larry..."

"I know..." He said immediatly.

"I'm very angry, also."

"Well, actually...me too."

"Oh." Ally looked startled, and frowned at him, getting upset "You're angry?...And may I ask why?"

He took a deep breath, apparently trying to stay calm, and tilted his head:

"I'll take you to lunch. Clearly, we need to talk."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why do you work at Cage&Fish?"

They shared one of those looks. Ally gave up and responded agressively "Tell you what?"

"What? Lara what? Don't you think I had the right to know you were pregnant with my child?"

"Hmmm no, see, this is the kind of right you lose when you fly away just like that, because it shows you don't fucking care about me!"

He made a frustrated sound and shouted back:

"Don't you change the subject! This has nothing to do with you and me. It's..."

"Well, when I hear that you're convinced you're failing everything and that you don't trust yourself, it's not only about your relationship with me, but with everyone around, including your children. So, how could I possibly think that you were ready to be a father again, after the thing you pulled?"

"The thing I... Hey, this was my personnal feelings at that time,okay? And were the hell did you get the right to decide whether I should get involved or not?"

"Because I LOVE her. This is my right. I don't want her to see you twice a year, alright? And miss you like crazy because you moved to the other part of the country because the mood struck you..."

"This is so not fair..." This time his voice sounded helpless "You were the one breaking up with me..."

"You were cheating on me!" Ally yelled.

"I certainly did not! How can you even think that...? What, it's my fault if you're feeling insecured? It's my fault if you're too childish to trust someone you're pretending to love? You didn't let me explain what happened..."

"I'll tell you what happened: YOU cancelled lunch with me, saying you had work! And I find you at the place we had gone to for our first date, WITH your ex-wife, who was, by the way, smearing your face with ice-cream! Ooh,so,you're right, it was not sexual, she was, what, foreseeing the snow weather for next winter?"

"It was not what it looked like, and I told you that. Nothing happened with Helena and you know it. You jumped on conclusions, assuming things that weren't true... You didn't even want to believe me, did you? Something else was going on with you, and you didn't talk to me about it..."

"No, you were the one acting erratic...you were walking away from me, because you didn't love me anymore, and you were too damn coward to tell me face to face!"

They stayed quiet for a minute, taking time to realize what had been said. Larry shook his head, took off his glasses, and looked at her in disbelief:

"You thought...I didn't love you anymore?..."

Ally pondered a few seconds and wiped away the tears streaming down her face:

"Yes...I had the feeling something was wrong, some kind of tension between us, and...I began thinking about what could be wrong...I remembered the first time we...uh...met..." She fought not to smile at the thought of it "I had this problem with…um, B-Brian, you know, he asked me to move in with him and you said I shouldn't do it, because, well, he probably didn't want to marry me." She looked up and Larry nodded, wanting for her to go on. "And you moved in with me. We lived together for what, uh, four, five months" She fought unconsciously with her dishtowel and bowed her head, as her words began to get barely audible. "You didn't ask me to marry you. We didn't even mention it. So, I-I figured that you didn't love me enough to propose, or that, uh, I, I don't know, you had changed your mind because of something I did..."

Larry clamped his hand in front of his mouth, looking stunned. He blinked, and rubbed his eyes, now aware she had totally misunderstood his words and behaviour.

"Is that what you think happened?..." He gasped and added quietly "God...Ally, it wasn't about you. I loved you, more than anything. The whole thing was about me: I think I just had realized how much I loved you, that what we had was precious, but, with my baggage, I had to know what I had done wrong,i n my wedding, to fail that miserably. I didn't want this to happen to us. I was so scared and I panicked, it seemed like everything I was trying to do, came out wrong, you didn't trust me, I mean...hell, I didn't even trust myself...next thing I knew, I was out of your life..."

Ally slowly started to become conscious of her part of responsabilities. The feeling of guilt made her want to hurt him as much as she had suffered.

"Don't you think you could have told me this before, I mean, you shouldn't have run away like that, just, as if you didn't care...about us..."

"I'm sorry..." He whispered bitterly.

Ally's voice began to rise, as she was getting more and more upset:

"And then, you left me with a note, Larry! Another god damn note!" Anger was written all over her face now "How can you do that, huh? Do you know the feeling, when all you've been left with is a note? No explanation, just..." She glared at him, took a napkin and a pen, then wrote a few words down "Here." She stood up quickly and stormed out of the restaurant. Larry sat there speechless, he took a sharp breath and read her note. The whole room got dark and he forced himself to take deep breaths, the room got brighter but it was still not quite distinct.

I am colorblind
Coffee black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am taffy stuck and tongue tied
Stutter shook and uptight
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am fine
I am covered in skin
No one gets to come in
Pull me out from inside
I am folded and unfolded and unfolding
I am colorblind
Coffee black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am fine

When he got on the street, he could only hear the sound of his heart pounding loudly in his chest, everything around seemed to have been tuned low. He eventually noticed people were staring at him, and became conscious of the tears running down his cheeks. He didn't care. All mattered to him was those 5 words dancing in front of his watering eyes: 'Stay out of our lives'.