On Wednesday morning of the week before they were scheduled to leave, Robert was in a limo on his way to NBC. He yawned happily when his cell phone rang. He checked the incoming number and got an uneasy feeling. It was Deborah. "Hey, what's up?" he asked casually. "Yeah ... those are my plans. .. Debbie, I don't have to justify myself to you. .... And, that's also none of your business. ... I'm sure there's a point to this call, so could you ... maybe get to it?" he asked pointedly. His face darkened and he clenched his jaw. "Jesus, Debbie, don't do this to me. We scheduled Christmas a month ago. I haven't been able to see Indio in almost two weeks because of your damn schedule." He held the phone at arm's length and gave her the finger before continuing, "I have a right to see my son, Debbie, and he sure as hell has a right to see me. .... Excuse me? No, it's not your decision to make. The court said I had the right to see him. ... Why are you doing this? You know I take great care of him. And, he wants to see me, too." Robert listened for a minute, "Deborah, I can't see him the day after. I have plans ... That's none of your business ... No, it's not ... I've already cleared it with rehab and probation. Deb, please don't do this." He exchanged a few more words with her before hanging up. Then he threw his cell phone at the car door opposite him and immediately went into a deep funk. By Friday, Calista hadn't seen or talked to Robert in two days and was becoming concerned, remembering his disappearances prior to his previous downslide and April 2001 arrest. When she got to the set that morning, she found him there, clearly not in the best of moods. He barely acknowledged her and then headed straight for his dressing room. Confused, Calista knocked on his door lightly and entered. "Hey," she said softly, I've missed you .. where ya been?" Belligerently, he snorted, "Do I have to check in with you now, too?" Her face registered genuine surprise and she answered quietly, "No, I was just worried, that's all." "Oh, and I thought you didn't wanna be my mother!" he retorted hostilely. Her eyes played back and forth with his, clearly not understanding what was going on. His words and tone hurt, and her anger was bubbling close to the surface. "Ah ... okay ... apparently you feel the need to kick someone. And, since there's no dog around, I guess I'm it, right?" His look was almost hateful as he turned his head away. Jesus, he thought, what the fuck am I doing? All she's ever done is love me - so why the hell am I being such a prick?! For two days, he'd felt like screaming at the whole world and he detested the feeling. One thing he knew - he didn't want to cause anymore wreckage than he already had between he and Calista - and he knew the only smart thing was for him to be alone with in his anger. "Okay," she asked, beginning to seethe inside, "now that you've kicked me, feel better?" Robert avoided her gaze and lowered his head. "Just ... leave me alone, all right? Back off. Can you do that?" Instantly, Calista was so infuriated she wanted to slap him. But, she knew it was herself she was angriest with - for actually believing he'd meant all the things he'd said and for believing it could work this time. She looked down at the floor and began nodding slowly. Hot tears stung her eyes. "Yeah ... I can do that. In fact, I can do that right now. I told you before I wasn't gonna play these stupid head games anymore. You wanna shut me out .... so you can be alone?" she asked hotly, "okay, you're alone ... because I'm gone!" She turned and left, slamming the door behind her. Robert clenched his teeth and made a loud, frustrated growling sound. He sat down with a thud and buried his face in his hands, heaving a deep, gut wrenching sigh. Suddenly, he grabbed his jacket and bounded out of his dressing room toward the studio's exit door. Outside, he started walking, fast, down the street, with no particular destination in mind. His thoughts were muddled. He was cursing Debbie, himself, and Calista, wallowing in self pity. ‘Why the hell should I care what she thinks or does,' he asked himself. Then he answered, ‘Because, you stupid asshole, she loves you and you love her! Shit, Downey, how many times in one lifetime are you gonna try and throw away the only good thing that's ever happened to you.' He turned and started walking back toward the studio. He found Calista on the set preparing to begin a scene with Bon Jovi. Walking toward her he motioned with his head for her to join him. She glared and turned her back. Okay, he said to himself, I deserve it. Dejectedly, he went back to his dressing room. They had no scenes together that day and Calista managed to artfully avoid him before she quietly slipped out and went home. That night, Robert's depression regarding Indio was completely consumed by the guilt and misery he felt because of Calista. He tried calling her a dozen times, but she refused to pick up the phone. His stomach was in knots, fearing that he might not be able to fix the damage. He tossed and turned all night, unable to sleep. Early the next morning, he wearily checked himself out of rehab and headed for her house. He rang the doorbell 15 times. Her car was there and he heard music from inside - he knew she was home - she just wouldn't open the door. He went around back and rang again. Then, he started pounding on her door, loudly. "C'mon, Calista, I know you're there." Silence. "Please ... open the door," he begged. "Go to hell," she yelled. "Calista, let me in! Please!" Finally, to shut him up, she opened the door and, without saying a word, turned and walked into the kitchen. Robert followed her docilely. "I'm sorry," he said sheepishly. Calista gave him a scornful look and busied herself cleaning out a cupboard drawer. "So, you're not even gonna talk to me?" She slammed the drawer shut and went to the refrigerator, ignoring him. "Look, I have no excuse," Robert told her pleadingly, " ... I had a bad couple of days .. I reverted ... my emotions ruled me again ... and I was only thinking of myself. I got mad at you because you didn't understand what I was feeling - and then I realized - how could you? I never told you. I just went to that secret place in my head again and didn't let you in, like I ... should have. And, I kicked you in the gut when I should've kicked myself in the head." Still no response from Calista. "YOU wanna kick me in the head?" he asked timidly. Dropping to his knees, he said, "Here, I'll make it an easier target for you." Giving him a dirty look, Calista walked into the laundry room, without saying a word. "Shit!" he pleaded, "scream at me, yell .... anything ... just talk to me, PLEASE! Say something!" She appeared in the laundry room door. "Okay, here's something. I told you, before - NO MORE! I deserve a helluva lot better than that from you. I will NOT be treated that way, EVER, by you or anyone. So ... go home, Robert. Go make someone else miserable. I'm sure women are all lined up - just waiting for the abuse." He put his hands between his legs and rocked back and forth. He looked up at her pitifully and scrunched up his face. "I don't wanna make anyone else miserable ... just you." The corners of her mouth played with a smile, knowing he hadn't realized his words had come out wrong, but she kept her head turned from him. Rising from his knees, Robert came up behind her and put his arms around her waist. With his cheek on hers, he said, "Truly, truly, truly. I'm sorry. I should've let you in instead of keeping it to myself. I didn't even realize I was doing it. I told you, I reverted - but it's not an irreversible reversion," he said, trying to make her laugh. He could feel the tenseness begin to leave her body and could tell her anger was subsiding. "Rapunzel, Rapunzel, won't you let down your hair?" he whispered sweetly, "and help me find my way back in? I promise I'll let you in - always - from here on. Would you ... consider ... letting your wall down ... just once more ... ?" She turned and faced him, still giving him a baleful glare. "Maybe ...," she replied disgustedly, "since with you it's become retractable." Robert laughed softly. "I love you, funny face. I was mean. I know it. And, I'm sorry. I promise, promise, it'll never happen again." He looked at her questioningly, "Are we made up?" "Don't you ever do that again! Next time, I might take you up on your offer!" she said menacingly. He raised his eyebrows curiously. "But," she warned, "I won't just kick you in the head, I might knock it completely off!" "And you have my permission," he nodded, "um... want me to sign something in advance that'll get you off the hook, saying it was justifiable homicide? I will." Her mouth played with a smile. "Are we okay again, Cal? I need to know we're okay," he begged. The thunder had left her face and she said quietly, "just don't ever do that again." "I promise," he said crossing his heart. Then, grinning, he added, "This wouldn't be your day to kiss a fool, would it?" "Well, if it is, you're certainly the biggest one I've ever known!" she scowled. And, he kissed her. They spent another 20 minutes kissing, touching, and holding each other. "Okay," she said, "are we gonna dance around it forever, or are you gonna tell me what's going on?" Robert related in detail his conversation with Debbie. "What a surprise," he snarled, "Seems like she's once again made plans which will, of course, conveniently make Indio unavailable for visitation on Christmas Day." He went on to explain his ensuing depression, and the fact that he hadn't wanted her to see him that way. "That's the only reason I stayed away. Promise." Calista shook her head in exasperation. She took his cell phone out of his pocket and forced it into his hands. "What?" he said. "Call your attorney, Rob, now, at home," she replied insistently. "Cal, the last thing I wanna do is piss her off. Christ, she might never let me see him again." "Robert, it's not up to her. There's a court order that specifically awards you visitation. I don't know why she's doing this - maybe she's jealous of you and me. In any case, by denying your visitation, she's clearly in violation of the court order, so call your attorney. If nothing else, he can threaten her lawyer with contempt of court unless she stops playing these games." "Ya think?" he asked. She nodded yes emphatically. That weekend they spent most of Saturday and all of Sunday playing with Liam, swimming and just being together. Monday afternoon, Robert poked his head in Calista's dressing room, "Got a minute?" "Sure. What's up?" she asked. He came in and closed the door, smiling. "My lawyer just called. He got a faxed letter from Debbie's attorney five minutes ago confirming that visitation's a go for Christmas Day." He was obviously excited and relieved. "I think Debbie's attorney must've explained to her lawyer, the way he did to me, that contempt of court isn't something to take lightly. Apparently, the law states that if a custodial parent is found in contempt more than twice, it's a basis for a change in custody, regardless of the circumstances." He grinned, "That would frost her balls, huh?" Calista gave him a wry grin. "So, it was this easy, huh? And, you knew it all the time, didn't you?" he asked. Smugly, Calista glanced down at the floor and shrugged. He grinned at her sweetly, "How the hell did you get so smart, anyway? And, what did I ever do before I met you." She smiled, "Screw up a lot?" He gave her a loving smirk and leaned in and kissed her. "Gotta go. If I don't see you tonight, I'll call." The rest of the week went by in a flash and all of a sudden it was Friday night and Calista's folks were arriving the next day so they could spend a few days, including Christmas Eve, with Calista and Robert before they left. "Um. I have a surprise," Calista said. Robert looked at her with raised eyebrows. She held out their plane tickets. "Take a look." It took a few minutes for him to register the fact that she'd changed their reservations and booked them on the same flight, with seats together. He opened his mouth in genuine surprise. "My, my, my, what's the world gonna say?" he teased, "the very private Ms. Flockhart flies off into the sunset for a romantic tryst with infamous, party going, troubled, drug addict actor." Then he laughed, "Sharon Black and Clint Stone? That's original, must've taken you all of three minutes to come up with that." "Hey, the press knows all the other names I've used, maybe they won't catch on." "Oh, yeah. This is so good, it'll fly right over their heads." he said. "Well, if it doesn't, fuck ‘em," she said matter of fact. He laughed so hard he choked himself and started coughing. "You know, don't you that once the media sinks their teeth in, we'll be first up on Access Hollywood and Entertainment Tonight every night until we resurface." "Yep," she puckered her lips and kissed him with a loud smack. "Guess, we'd better prepare for the onslaught." "Just hope you know what you're doing." She shrugged again.
Christmas morning, Robert picked up Indio very early and brought him back to Calista's just as everyone else was getting up. Liam adored Indio and was like his little shadow. Indio enjoyed the role of big brother. Robert and Calista had decided not to exchange presents, opting instead to consider Barbados their gift to each other. When it came time to open gifts, Liam wasn't quite sure what was going on, but the Christmas lights had fascinated him from the moment Robert and Calista had put up their tree and other decorations. He wasn't interested in his own presents but, rather, was eagerly helping Indio rip into his, much to Indio's chagrin. Several times Indio started to say something, but Liam's innocent little face stopped him, and he decided to just go along with it. Calista helped her mother fix breakfast while Robert busily divided his time between the camcorder and digital camera. After breakfast, Robert played video games for awhile with Indio, and Calista and her parents helped Liam figure out how to work several of his toys. Calista had been unable to talk Robert out of getting Liam a battery powered Corvette which he could sit in and steer all around the house. Liam was screaming with delight as he was ramming everything in sight and Robert was howling right along with him. Even Calista's dad got into the act. Calista threw up her hands in defeat, warning Robert that he'd better not let Liam hurt himself. She watched with her mother as the men behaved more like kids than the children. Her mother told her, "Don't get your hopes up, honey, they never grow up." Midmorning, Calista's dad asked Robert to take a walk with him. They walked in silence for awhile before her dad put his arm around Robert and apologized for what he'd said to him during their Thanksgiving visit. "Hey, it's cool," Robert said, "if you weren't concerned as hell, I'd probably be the first one standing in line to have you committed. But, that doesn't change the fact that I love her. And, don't worry that I'm pressuring her, because I'm not." He suddenly laughed, "Guess you already know how impossible that is." More seriously, he added, "I'm the first to realize that Calista needs to know once and for all .. along with you and her mom, that I can be trusted. Hell, I need to know that I can trust myself. She's told me it's gonna take time ... and I'm willing to wait. But if, or when, she decides she wants something more, and I've proven I can give it to her, I hope we'll have your blessing, cause I know she wouldn't want it any other way." "Robert, we just want her to be with someone who loves her, someone she can count on. We want her to be happy." "Fair enough," Robert said, "cause that's what I want, too." The morning went by much too fast. Robert left around noon to take Indio home and arrived back just in time to load their luggage into a waiting cab. Their flight was leaving at 3:00 and they were supposed to be at the airport two hours before departure. Everyone exchanged hugs and kisses, and Calista was tearful as she said goodbye to Liam. Her folks finally shooed them out of the house, guaranteeing everything would be fine and ordering them to have a wonderful time. Calista made them promise for the sixth time that they'd wait until she and Robert returned at 3:00 on January 1 to celebrate Liam's first birthday. Robert and Calista arrived at the airport only 1-1/2 hours before their flight was due to leave and barely made it through security. They made sure to be the very last to board. Second class was packed to capacity but they were in the company of only eight other passengers in first class. Eight very classy people who chose to leave the couple alone. Therefore, they were totally unprepared for the media horde that met them when they landed in Atlanta for their connecting flight. She said to Robert under her breath, "How the hell did they find out we were on this plane?" He took his cell phone out of his pocket and waved it back and forth in front of her. "Ah ha?" he whispered back, "Ever hear of cell phones? Spies are everywhere. They probably know what time you went to the bathroom this morning." He raised his eyebrows and added suggestively, "And, God knows what else they heard we ... you ... did this morning." She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, trying not to smile. Flashbulbs were going off everywhere and questions were being shouted from all directions. "I'm just tagging along with a friend," Calista told them coyly. "Robert, how about it?" a voice yelled out, "you two just friends?" "Well," he said, "after last year, I figured it'd be a lot more fun spending the holidays with a friend instead of the enemy." Another reporter from an obscure local station cornered Robert and rattled off her call letters, "Robert, are you familiar with our affiliate station?" "Oh, yeah," he nodded and said dryly looking back at Calista, "can't stop thinkin about ‘em." "There's been rumors of a romance between you and Calista since last year. Can we assume you two are a couple?" "No," Robert said, "you may actually quote me as saying we are definitely a couple .. of very tired travelers." They plowed their way through the crowd and finally stumbled into the first class lounge where they found some privacy, and lunch. Calista and Robert looked at each other and cracked up. They both said in unison, "Access Hollywood!" When they finally exited the lounge, there was a flurry around them as they were recognized by more and more people. They graciously signed some autographs as they inched toward their gate. Thankfully, security had kept most of the press out of this area, but they still had a few to contend with. Robert was very glib and managed to fend them off gracefully and effectively. Once on the plane, they each sank gratefully into their seats and were soon on their way to the land of beautiful clear water, sunshine, and Pinà Coladas. They exchanged a look of pure anticipation. Calista called her mother later that evening from the plane and laughed when she heard they'd been the lead story on Access Hollywood and that Jan Carlson on Entertainment Tonight had followed suit. She nudged Robert and held the phone up to his ear so he could hear the conversation. Calista instructed her mother to ignore it. "And," she added, "when you read in the tabloids tomorrow that Robert and I have been secretly married for six months and that Liam is really his illegitimate son, you'll probably wanna ignore that, too." But, her parents had long ago stopped believing or being upset over the absurd stories always being printed about their daughter. Anything worth knowing they knew they'd hear directly from Calista. Calista had never been to Barbados and was disappointed that it was too dark for her to see anything on the cab ride to the house. Robert assured her that the wait until tomorrow would be worth it. The inside and exterior of the house was incredible. White marble floors and no windows, just shutters that when folded back made the house and outdoors appear to be one vast open expanse. There was a beautiful clear pool which began in the living room and continued for about eight feet under the floor to a corner of the master bedroom and then back under the floor emptying into a bigger pool on a picturesque natural rock and foliage veranda where, at the far end, a pocket created a waterfall that cascaded down a manmade rock ladder and ended up as another scenic pool at the home's lower level. The house, built on a bluff, was set out over the water and the sound of waves under them created the most relaxing sound Calista had ever heard. It was furnished exquisitely and tastefully, totally embracing the island's Caribbean flavor. She looked at Robert and said, "Okay. I'm hooked. I wanna stay here forever. God, how nice would it be to have this as one of the island locations for the movie." "Let's nose around," Robert grinned. "I've never been here, but my friend's wife told me all about it. No wonder they love it so much." They explored all three levels of the home, each as breathtaking as the other. There were six bedrooms and they opted for the one on the upper level with the pool running through it. It was still early, only 9:30. Robert turned on some soft music, fixed them both a tonic and lime, lit some candles, and they settled down on the veranda. The gentle tradewinds caressed their faces like warm delicate feathers and tropical flowers filled the air with sweet perfume. Robert got up and drew her to him. Huskily, he whispered, "Dance with me, sweetheart." They kissed and danced and kissed some more. "I could so get used to this," Calista sighed dreamily. "Hm," Robert said sexily in her ear, "whatever are we gonna do for seven whole days ... alone?" Calista suddenly started to cry and buried her face against his neck. "Baby, what is it? She couldn't speak and just shook her head without moving it from against his neck. "What? Are you sorry?" he asked. She shook her head again. Robert kissed her cheek gently, "Then what's wrong, sweetie. Talk to me." Looking up at him with tear filled eyes, she whispered, "I'm too happy, and it scares me. It's too good to last." He sat down and pulled her into his lap, gently bringing her face down to his. "Cal, I'm taking it one day at a time, that's all I can do. But, knowing you're not afraid to face whatever's ahead makes it a whole lot easier So, hang in there with me, baby, please? We're gonna get there, I know it." He kissed her, "Okay?" Her eyes silently promised him she would. "You know," he said softly, "even though you won't fit in my stocking, you're the best present I've ever had. Merry Christmas, sweetheart." She smiled, "Merry Christmas, back." She rubbed noses with him and then kissed his eyelids, then his nose, then his chin, and finally his mouth. "Make love to me," she whispered. The next morning they found a couple of Mopeds in the garage and set out to explore the island, stopping for lunch at a local place on the beach where they sampled the speciality "Conch" stew. They found a few markets where they made some unique discoveries and then bought some fruit and several other interesting items for dinner. If anyone recognized them during their shopping spree, they were gracious enough not to bother them. Robert discovered an out-of-the-way seafood stand where they bought some cooked crab, fresh baked bread and several bottles of distilled water and they headed for the beach where they found a secluded cove just right for a private, romantic, lunch. That night they ventured out to some of the local clubs, purposely staying away from the tourist traps. They ended up at a reggae lounge, appropriately called "The Reggae Lounge." The owner, Henderson, taught them how to do the Marengue and soon Robert and Calista were dancing like natives. They were thoroughly into the music when a lady in her mid-50's came over and hit Robert, hard, on the arm. Startled, he jumped back, wondering what the hell was going on. His expression was one of complete puzzlement. "I'm so mad at you for leaving Ally," the lady glared at him, "I could just hit you." "Uh ... I think you already did," Robert replied, rubbing his arm. "Oooh, you're such a rat!" she hissed. "How could you just leave her like that! Don't you know how much she loves you!!" her face was filled with anger. Robert looked at the woman, then at Calista, and back at the woman. Then pointing to Calista, he said to the lady, "Look. We made up. Doesn't that count for something?" The lady's mouth dropped open and she said, "Oh, my God, you're them! Hey, everybody," she called to the crowd, "it's Ally and Larry! Oh, sweet Jesus, you're back together. I'm so happy ... you've made me so happy, I could just cry," which she did. Then, drying her eyes and covering her mouth with her hand as though she were telling Calista a secret, she whispered, "Larry's the only one for you, you know." Calista smiled, "Oh, I know. I knew that the first time I met him." Happily, the lady went back to her table, looking back, smiling and waving at them several times. Robert quipped, "I think we made her day." Back home, in bed, they reminisced about their day. "Did you really know the first time you met me?" Robert asked her. "Well ... " "Well?" "How about you? "You first." "No you." "You." Calista laughed. "You just have to have the last word, don't ya. Okay, yes! Satisfied?" "Me too." "Really?" "Promise. I looked in your eyes," he said, "and that was it." "You lie. The only thing you wanted when you met me was Debbie." He looked at her for a long time. "No," he said slowly, "I wanted to get back with Debbie ... for Indio ... so we could be a family again. I'm learning there's a difference." "Well, you never let me know you were interested." "Oh, really? Candy, flowers, and my best seduction techniques every hour on the hour didn't give you a clue? That happens to you a lot, does it?" She grinned, "At least 5-6 guys a day." He pulled her on top of him. "Well, there's only one guy you need to worry about right now." They spent the following days lazing in the pool or roaming the island or enjoying early evenings with the locals. Not one person had bothered either of them for an autograph even though many had recognized them. What they treasured most, though, were the nights alone spent in each other's arms, listening to the peaceful surf and making love under the stars. Their last night on the island was New Year's Eve and they ventured into an area known as St. Lawrence Gap and treated themselves to a lobster dinner in a quaint inn overlooking the water. After dinner, they took off their shoes and took a romantic barefoot walk along the beach. They got back home about 11:30, put on some music and opened a bottle of sparking cider. Exactly at midnight, Robert kissed her sweetly. "Happy New Year, sweetheart," he said gazing at her lovingly, "here's to new beginnings." Calista said hopefully, "To new beginnings." Eyes glistening, Robert whispered, "I love you." She searched his face and, seeing such promise and expectation, she said softly, "I love you back." The next morning, Calista felt something brush across her face. She opened one eye to see him leaning close to her with a shaving cream beard and shampoo foam covering his hair and eyebrows. "I'm Old Father Time," she heard Robert say in a weak, quivering voice, trying hard to sound like a 100 year old man. She glanced at the clock and saw it was only 6:00 a.m. "Go away," she moaned, rolling over, "I wanna go back to sleep." 10 minutes later, she felt him again. He rubbed his ‘clean shaven' face against hers and, reluctantly, she opened her eyes. He nuzzled her ear and grinned, "Now, I'm Baby New Year." She laughed, "You idiot. What're you doing?" "Tryin' to get in your pants ... I'm horny," he said, stripping off his towel and crawling on top of her. "You're always horny," she quipped as she wrapped her arms around his neck, "not that I'm counting, but I seem to recall three times last night, or should I say this morning." "Are you complaining?" he asked huskily as his eyes burned into hers. To answer him, she pulled him down to her by his hair and their tongues connected. He pulled the blankets down and his mouth found her breast. His tongue circled her nipple and then began downward, biting her along the way. His hands and fingers were exploring the rest of her body. She ran her fingers down his back and then brought her hand around to the front and began to caress him tenderly. He pulled back, his eyes burning with desire, and entered her hungrily. His voice was a raspy whisper in her ear, "God, Ms. Flockhart, we dance so good together." She moaned as she moved with him in perfect rhythm, "Mm, and don't think I'm not gonna patent these moves, Mr. D."
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Author: shirley fry
E-mail: emtnest@worldnet.att.net
Thanks to: Helen, for inspiring a few paragraphs and
for the insightful medical/psycho references. Much appreciation
to Charlotte for her guidance as my editor/musical director.