"Carter," she cried from the bathroom. "Will you come here?"
He brought himself back to the vanilla of the room. Suck it up, Carter.
No, he replied to himself. Something was wrong with him. It couldn't be love though.
"Yeah," he said, entering the bathroom. She wasn't there, though. He looked around the small room, as if he was missing her hiding behind the shower curtain or something.
"Over here," she said from the bedroom down the hall. He walked surely through the narrow way, and came to her room. She had her head in her hands, but looked up when he came in.
"What is it?" he asked.
She got up immediately. "Never mind," she laughed. "What do you want to eat?"
Carter looked at her for a second, but then stiffened and smiled quickly. "I don't care. What do you want?"
She collapsed onto her back on the bed. Her small, short frame folded and she turned onto her side. "Whatever," she said. She closed her eyes and lay there. Carter watched her chest rise and fall, in sync with her silent breaths. Her eyelids were softly shut, draped over her deep brown eyes.
He surprised himself as he walked to the bed and fell next to her. He took on the same position as her, only looking towards her. She opened her eyes at his form next to her and smiled. He smiled back with a tight grin, but didn't give in. He wasn't sure of what to do next.
"We gotta eat, don't we?" he asked.
She giggled. "You must be hungry. What do you want, then, because I'm not that hungry."
He rolled his eyes with a smile. "Then why did we come here to eat?"
She shrugged.
Carter felt tense at once. She was looking at him, studying every detail of his face. Her head was gracefully lying on her arm, which was extended out above her towards the headboard. She only blinked a few times, Carter saw. She brought her hand up to Carter's face and stroked it. The smile from his own face faded automatically.
She rested her hand on the bed again, much to Carter's disappointment. He rolled onto his back, uncomfortable with the situation. If anyone's fault, it was his. He had given her the green light when he joined her on the bed.
She laughed into the quiet, causing Carter to nearly jump. "You're so shy."
He shook his head, still staring at the ceiling. He didn't see her reaction. Did she smile? Whatever she did, was it something good? What was good?
Why was he asking all of these questions?
She caressed his hand with her own. He froze again, slightly. He justly turned to see her gazing at his hand. She ran her finger around his hand, making it tingle with a new emotion. He didn't know whether to be uneasy or contented with her action. They had been like this before, though. It's not like anything would happen. Nothing ever had.
He turned toward her. Their eyes locked. They looked at one another tightly. Carter's hand reciprocated her motions and fondled her own hand. Her smile was a small and shy one, as Carter doubted he even wore one. She came closer to him, all the while Carter's intensity rising. It was the feeling between them, something was going on. He put his arm around her, again shocked at his instincts.
She leaned toward his face and kissed him. He was tightened immediately. He kissed her back, again relying on inborn feelings. They pulled apart, looking down. She brought her eyes back to his, searching for his reply. He wanted it to happen, didn't he?
She read his eyes, evidently, and kissed him again. This time filled with more passion. The rest of the world went away for a moment as they held each other. Their lips were gently caressing, while Abby's hands held his face. He had one hand wrapped about her back to meet her hair, playing with it. She changed positions, pushing herself over top of him. He didn't say anything, careful not to break the moment. He was scared. This was he and Abby. Their relationship was a touchy-feely friendship, but usually friendships didn't go this far.
He gripped her waist with his hands, feeling her freeze as he had before on the inside. She held his face again, near his neck. Carter was lost. What had driven her to this? Why had he followed? The questions were coming back to haunt him, and he hated it.
He was now more aware of her body pressed against his. He bent his head to kiss her neck, finally taking his own leap. She lifted her head back, enjoying his actions. He kissed her collarbone, causing her to moan. He sat up, as she followed, and tightened his hug around her little waist. She rested her hands on his shoulders, her arms and elbows lying against his chest. Their lips still teased the other's, with each of them exploring their bodies. Carter found his hands in her chestnut tresses again. Her hands were running up and down his back, through his hair. He smiled to himself; he wasn't afraid.
She had reached for his shirt, taking him by surprise. He knew her eyes were settled on his own, awaiting his response. He looked up at her, with his arms still around her small waist. Her eyes read sudden regret. He guessed she was no uncomfortable. She uneasily shifted, looking at him.
"I didn't think that you'd want to," Carter found himself explaining.
Abby was breathing loosely, looking towards Carter before she spoke again. Carter watched her eyes seem to dance while lying perfectly still. "I don't know if we should."
Carter nodded and looked towards the comforter on the bed. Just a minute ago they were wrapped in just a gaze, watching the other with confusion and eagerness. It was already just a memory, and perhaps, at this rate, it was all it would ever be.
He didn't want it to be like that. He looked up at her to see her looking down as he had. He kissed her forehead, bringing her eyes to meet his. He was frightened again of her reaction. He waited for her to reject him. Instead, she watched for his move.
He knew that whatever he decided to do would change them forever. Whether he ignored this obvious chance, or took a leap.
He couldn't do anything with her. He wanted to, but could he? If he denied it now, could it ever happen?
He leaned in and kissed her. He didn't listen to himself as he did so. His arms inched around her once again. She hooked her arms around his neck, then brought them down to his arms. They were strong around her, Carter noted, as he eased himself through their uneasiness. They were both shy with this new situation, Carter knew.
She pressed her lips lightly against his neck, causing Carter to do the same to her. She moaned softly and fell back to the bed. Carter took a look at her. He saw her take a worried glance at his face. She was trembling. Carter felt instant sympathy for whatever was wrong. He didn't want to do this with her. He did, he knew it, but he couldn't. Not now.
He arched above her and kissed her head sweetly. She closed her eyes at this. Carter went to her side on the bed, taking one hand to her hair. He stroked it lovingly and didn't expect a response from her.
Abby sensed it and turned toward him. She took his hand from her hair and held it to her neck, near her chest. She held it as if it were her treasure and shook her head. "Don't hold back because of me."
Carter just looked at her. He didn't know what to do with that.
"This is us," she said. "Us. Me and you." She began to touch his hand with gentle fingers. "I think," she said, but lost herself and didn't know how to continue.
Within seconds, Abby came towards Carter. He didn't hesitate to reciprocate, glad with her choice. He kissed her as softly as he could, barely touching her lips. He was lost in the moment, like he had never been before. Every other time he was with someone, it was the sexual factor that took him away. This time, it was Abby. It was her and just the moment.
He felt his clothes being taken away. His hands searched for her body, hungry for her. They revealed themselves to the other. Taking an instant to soak it in, they leapt back to each other. Their hands couldn't leave the exploring. It was amazing. They made love carelessly, freely. It wasn't rushed. It was gentle, instead. Passionate and loving.
Carter fell towards her, kissing her temples. She breathed heavily with her eyes closed. Her body was still shaking from their experience together. She was shuddering, too weak to smile. Carter wasn't much different; all he could manage to do was kiss her. Her face was covered in a light, transparent blanket of perspiration, as was his. He snuggled up against her naked, shaking form to comfort her. Without opening her eyes, she kissed his neck. Exhausted, they both fell away to slumber.
