Lost without you.

Author: Kara Murphy
Rating: PG
Summary: Ben has called off the wedding and he has started dating
Paula.  
Disclaimer: I don't own them. AND I also DO NOT own Lost without You
by Delta Goodrem I'm just borrowing it but I will put it back.

LOST WITHOUT YOU

"Charlotte what do I do?" Bron wined to her friend. Things had
defiantly not been going well for either of them in the love
department.

"Hon, I don't know. I have never been good at giving advice for this
sort of stuff. But if you asked me which surgical procedure would be
best in…" Charlotte rambled on. Bron was too busy in her own mind to
worry about what Charlotte had to say especially if it involved
maggots.

"Bron if your not going to listen then you can at least go and buy me
a drink" Charlotte told her with an amused _expression on her face.
Charlotte could tell that Bron wasn't trying to be rude but Charlotte
would take a free drink any day.

"Sorry Charlotte I just…" Bron stopped suddenly. Charlotte realised
that Bron wasn't even looking at her but past her towards the door. 
Charlotte turned around and saw Ben and Paula walking in and heading
over to the tables

"Bron we can go if you want to." Charlotte told Bron. She didn't
think that Bron would want to be in the same room as them if they
were having a nice dinner.

"No. Cougar's is my place. If he doesn't like it then he can leave.
The same again?" Bron asked as she was heading over to the bar.

"Thanks" Charlotte replied not taking her eyes off Ben and Paula. How
could Ben do this to Bron? She thought Bron is the sweetest person
that she had ever known. If only she could have someone like Bron.
Ben turned around and stared at Charlotte who held his gaze and
stared back. Ben turned away and focused on Paula. "Guilty ones
always look away first." Charlotte mumbled.  Bron returned with their
drinks and they continued to throw them down for another three hours.
Paula and Ben stayed there the whole time and Bron was miserable even
Charlotte attempts to make her laugh didn't work.

Paula got up and left and to Bron's surprise Ben didn't follow. He
stayed where he was and stared at his drink.  Bron was tempted to go
over to him but considering she was very drunk she didn't think that
it was a good idea.

"Go on." Charlotte said as if she read Bron's mind. "What do you have
to loose?" Charlotte egged her on.

"Do you really think that I should?" Bron asked instantly serious.
She glanced over at Ben who was still staring into his untouched
beer.  "I'm going to do it." She said as she got up.

Charlotte stood up as well grabbed Bron by the wrist and gave her a
quick kiss on the cheek." Good Luck" she whispered.

"Thanks" Bron muttered and walked over to Ben.

Ben looked up and saw her coming towards him. God she is beautiful he
thought. I wish that she was coming to talk to me but she is probably
just going home and before he knew it she had sat down.
Ben couldn't help but smile. When she returned the smile he felt
something that he was sure was gone. He never felt anything at all
like that for Paula. His feeling weren't even this strong for Steph.
He was sure at this moment that Bron was the one that he was destined
to be with. He had really screwed his chances here though. He was
surprised that Bron was smiling at him. He thought that she would
have slapped him in the face and that would be that.

"You don't look so happy, what's up?" Bron asked. At first Bron
thought that she was just making conversation but she realised that
no matter what she would always love Ben. She still couldn't be made
at him for what he did to her; of course she would never admit that
to him. 

"I just realised something that should have been very clear to me
before. God I'm such an idiot"

As soon as Ben said this she felt her heart skip a beat. Could he be
talking about her?
"I'm a good listener you know. If you want you could tell me what is
wrong. I don't bite. Well except that time…" No matter how upset she
was she could always find time for a joke.

Ben smiled and then laughed. She was pleased that she could still
make him laugh. The music started almost suddenly and Ben leaned over
the table and said to Bron "It's a bit loud in here do you wanna go
outside. Bron nodded in response and followed Ben out the front
door.  She glanced back at Charlotte who was talking to a blonde girl
at the bar.

When they got outside Ben walked over to the bench and sat down. Bron
followed suit. Sitting side by side they seemed terrified of each
other. No one spoke for what seemed like hours but it was really only
a few minutes.

"Ben, talk to me." Bron begged. She hoped that he still trusted her.
Probably not after all she did break the one promise that she made to
him and herself.

"I've made a few really stupid decision and now I am paying the price
for it. Bron I'm so sorry." Ben looked up and looked deep into her
eyes. Something that he hadn't done for a while. "I'm so sorry"

Bron could tell that he meant every word of it but she wasn't going
to let him off this easily. `Sorry for what?" She asked. She wanted
to hear him say it.

"C'mon Bron you know what for."  Ben said. He could tell that they
were going to end up in a fight.

"Well I would just like to know exactly which part you are
apologising for. For leaving me, cancelling the wedding one-week
before it was supposed to happen, for fucking a colleague and a
friend. What Ben? Exactly which part are you apologising for?"

"All of it. Ok Bron. All of it. I know I hurt you and I'm sorry, but
you hurt me too." Ben replied. He knew that he shouldn't take in out
on her but it was all true.

Bron stood up and started to walk away. Ben knew Bron well enough to
know that she was crying. "I don't know why I came over to talk to
you it is always the same conversation over and over again. I get it
Ben I screwed up ok. I know that I hurt you so much but I have said
sorry I don't know what else to do." She turned around to leave.
Although Ben had seen the tears in her eyes she didn't want him to
see them streaming down her face.        

She had only taken two steps when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
She whirled around and was looking into the eyes of Ben. She could
see the pain and sorrow that was there. They mirrored her own. Ben
wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her to his chest.
She forgot how good it felt to be in hi arms. She wrapped her arms
around his waist and let the tears flow.

"I love you Bron, I Love you so much." Ben whispered into her hair.
He just hopped that she didn't push him away. But to his surprise she
didn't. She didn't say anything at first but after about a minute she
said.

"I love you too Ben and I'm sorry for what I did to you." Bron let go
of Ben and looked up at him. He took his thumb and brushed a stray
tear away. Ben slowly leant down and kissed Bron softly on the lips.
Bron responded by wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him
into a very passionate kiss.

Neither had noticed that it had started raining and when they finally
let go of each other they realised and Ben took Bron's hand and led
her to his car. "C'mon I'll take you home or you could come back to
my place if you want." Ben said as he unlocked her door.

Bron didn't get in but stood there and smiled at Ben. "Yeah I'd like
that." She replied and got in the car.

As Ben turned on the car a familiar song came across the radio. Bron
loved this song because until about five minutes ago it described her
feeling about Ben.

Lost Without You
I know I can be a little stubborn sometimes
A little righteous and too proud
I just want to find a way to compromise
Cos I believe that we can work things out

I thought I had all the answers never giving in
But baby since you've gone I admit that I was wrong

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side u
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye
don't know what
I'd do? I'm lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

How my ever gonna get rid of these blues
Baby I'm so lonely all the time
Everywhere I go I get so confused
You're the only thing that's on my mind

Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day
Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side u
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye
don't know what
I'd do? I'm lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

If I could only hold you now and make the pain just go away
Can't stop the tears from running down my face
Oh

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side u
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye
don't know what
I'd do? I'm lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

By Kara Murphy
v_I_p_666@hotmail.com