posted 2-19-02
4
Before you read, I want you to know that the poem in this chapter is NOT MINE! I did not write it. It is by the author Javan. So please don't sue me because I am not trying to break any copyright laws! I just really suck at writing poetry and this one was absolutely beautiful. Okay, to my chapter…
1/5/02
"Love is the most powerful force in the world, and with love, anything is possible."
Ed's words keep repeating in my head. What does he mean by that? I can't figure it out! Alison has gone to stay with Livvie and Jack. I guess it's really for the best, because after that kiss this morning, I really don't think I could stop myself from doing that again. And it's wrong. Alison is right, it can never happen again. I have to stop thinking about her and concentrate on the reason I came back…to help Alison mend things with Jamal. Their love is strong, and they can deal with this. I hope. Ha! Oh please, Rafe, you know that is not the real reason why you came back. You're in love with her! You are in love with Alison Barrington. Face it. Could that have been what Ed meant? I am in love with Alison, is it possible that she could love me back? No, get real, Rafe, you are an angel. This is driving me crazy! What does Ed mean? Does he mean that it is possible for Alison to work things out with Jamal? Or he is talking about me, because I had the strange feeling that he knows something I don't. He always tells me I should watch how my behavior affects other people, and yet, I kiss Alison and fall in love with her and he smiles about it? I don't understand it!
Maybe someday I'll be lucky enough
To hold you in my arms
Rather than just in my mind
Maybe someday I'll trade in empty dreams
For the treasure of a lifetime memory
And the cold of the World
Will be shattered by your warmth
I love you, Alison. If I had one wish, I would only wish for one thing…you.
Alison stood on Livvie and Jack's porch. The whole time she had walked to their house, her mind had been on Rafe. It wasn't until she walked up the steps that she thought of Jamal, which was the real reason why she was not home in the first place.
Alison timidly knocked on the door. She hoped coming here was not a mistake. The last thing she wanted to do was to put Livvie and Jack in the middle of all this. They were Jamal's friends too.
"Alison," Livvie said as she opened the door. She could tell by the look on Alison's face that things were not well. "Sweetie, what's wrong? Come in."
Alison walked in and sat her bag down on the floor. "Is Jack here?"
"No, he's at the bike shop."
"Um, Livvie, could I stay with you guys for a while?"
"Of course you can. Oh, gosh, did you and Jamal have a fight? Is that was this is all about?"
"I sorta left him."
"You broke up with him?" Livvie asked, stunned.
"No, no. I just...I just got mad at him and I had to get away for a while. So, you really don't mind if I stay here, for now anyway?"
"No, you can stay here as long as you want. Come on, why don't you come sit here and tell me all about it."
Alison took off her jacket and sat down on the couch with Livvie.
"I don't even know where to begin, Livvie."
"Well tell me what happened with you and Jamal. He seemed really upset this morning."
"This morning? You saw Jamal this morning?"
"Yeah, he came banging on the door at the crack of dawn looking for you. When I told him that you weren't here, he didn't believe me. Then he left in such a hurry and I didn't get a chance to ask him what was going on. Where did you stay last night? He said you left."
"I stayed with Rafe. I was…I was going to come here but it was so late and Rafe was there for me. I was so upset over Jam-"
"Whoa, wait! Rafe? I thought Rafe went back up to…"
"No, he's back, at least for a little while anyway. It's like a reward for a job well done. He gets to stay for a while and enjoy his time on Earth, without his powers though."
"Okay, so you stayed with Rafe because you and Jamal got into a fight?"
"I got upset with him over Valerie."
"Oh no, what did she do now?"
"She's depressed over her baby and Jamal was there to comfort her! Which look, it's not that I don't want Jamal to help Valerie. I understand she is going through a difficult time, but Jamal doesn't have to keep putting her first! I'm his girlfriend and he should take my feelings into consideration!"
"Well have you talked to Jamal since last night?"
"Yeah, he found me at Rafe's and we got into this huge argument over Valerie. I told him to leave and he stormed out, then I just left and came straight here."
"Aww, honey, well you can stay here as long as you like. Look, maybe you should just give this some time. Just a few days for you and Jamal to cool off, and then you can work things out…"
"Livvie, I'm not so sure I want to anymore."
"What? Alison, you're not serious are you?"
"Livvie, there's something that I haven't told you."
"What?"
"I…I kissed Rafe again! More than once, actually!"
"Alison!"
"I know, I know, I know! But I couldn't help it! We were in the park yesterday and he was there and I don't know, it just sort of happened."
"Alison, look, it's obvious what is going on here. Jamal has been distant with you lately, and you have turned to Rafe. He's been a good friend, so of course, you would turn to him."
"But it's not that, Livvie! That's what I thought it was…but now I'm not so sure. I…I think I'm starting to have feelings for him!"
"Alison, this is not good. Have you forgot that little fact that he's an…"
"I know, I know! He's an angel. But, Livvie, it's not like I don't realize that. And in fact, I've tried to push away these feelings just because of that very fact but I don't think I can do that any longer. It's not fair to Jamal!"
"Whoa, Alison, what are you saying? You mean to tell me you've had these feelings for Rafe for a while now?"
Alison shook her head. "I think I have, Livvie. What am I going to do?"
Livvie took hold of Alison's hand. "Look, Alison, I am your friend, and I don't want you to get hurt. Look, you and I both know that Rafe isn't one of us. He lives up there, and a relationship with him is only going to hurt you."
"But Rafe would never hurt me."
"No, not intentionally, but what happens when he has to leave? Alison, this can't work. You know that, don't you?"
"I know it, Livvie, but my heart doesn't realize that yet."
"What about your feelings for Jamal? You can't be telling me that you are suddenly out of love with him, are you?"
"Of course I still love Jamal. I'll always love him. But…something's changed between us. I just…I just don't feel it anymore."
"Alison, that's normal! You hear all the time about couples who have been together for a long time suddenly realizing the relationship has changed. They go from not being able to keep their hands off each other to just, well, you know. When's the last time you and Jamal went out on a date or had a romantic candlelight dinner?"
"I can't remember."
"Well there, you see! You have to put the romance back into your relationship. That's all it is."
"Maybe you're right."
"Just take some time to think about this, okay. You need to concentrate on Jamal and getting things back on track."
Alison smiled. "You're right. You're right, Livvie." Then she hugged her best friend.
"I'm just looking out for you. The last thing I want is for you to be hurt."
Alison hugged her friend tighter, but in her mind, her thoughts were still on Rafe and her growing feelings for him.