There is a silent sin that plagues married and single women. Some women shy away from the subject, while others laugh it off. I have to be honest and say, I am delivered from the shame of masturbation. I am not ashamed to share my testimony with anyone. Many women have told me that my openness to share has helped them. It's time out for secret sin! Jesus came to destroy the works of the enemy (I John 3:8), so we don't have to struggle with this, or any other problem that the devil throws at us. We have authority to give back to the enemy, what he has placed in our lives.

I looked up the word master, in the American Heritage Talking Dictionary (CD ROM) which says, one that has control over another or others. The word rebate is explained as the amount returned, refunded, restitution, reimbursement. Reatitution simply means the act of restoring to the rightful owner, something that has been taken away. The Holy Spirit helped me title this story after seeing the definitions. Masterbation has mastered many people into corners of shame and humiliation, but Jesus came and made restitution for this world by giving His own life. We don't have to fall prey to sexual sin! The doors of deliverance have been opened through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Psalm 79:9 (NIV) says "Help us, O God our Savior, for the glory of your name; deliver us and forgive our sins for your name's sake." It's that simple! Ask the Lord to forgive you if you have been involved in masturbation and believe that He has heard your prayer.

It took me a while to write this article, because I was waiting on the Holy Spirit to give me the right person, to interview. I waited 3 months, and on November 19, 1999, God gave me Danielle. It was sort of funny, because I was trying to ask the question, "Have you ever been involved in masturbation?" I just took a deep breath and said it. God knew the timing was right, because Danielle began to struggle in her spirit. I didn't have a clue what she was going through, because we were talking over the telephone. In our conversation, Danielle had a slight nervousness in her voice, but that nervousness soon turned into deliverance.

The Interview

Monica: I know this is embarrassing Danielle, but tell me why you chose to do this article with me?

Danielle: Freedom! When I got off the phone with you, I went to pray. I just cried out before God. I knew I was delivered from masturbation but I still felt ashamed to share my testimony. I am glad you called! (laughing) I want others to hear my testimony and not be ashamed.

When I was a child, I began to explore my body, out of curiosity. Some doctors would say that it's normal for children to do this. I don't receive that! To be perfectly honest, I didn't know it was wrong. I would hear people talk about it, but I would never join in the conversations. I thought to myself, "I would rather do this than commit adultery." Yes, I was married and saved, with two kids and yet, I would masturbate, to fulfill my desires. I realized this was wrong, when I began to yield myself to the Holy spirit. I would still masturbate, even though I knew it was wrong. I know now that I was not totally delivered. I received my deliverance when you called me to do this article. At first, I was ashamed to use my real name and then you shared your testimony with me. You gave me 1 John 1:9, which says, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (KJV)

Its like a big load being lifted off me. Now I don't care what others think! I am free! If telling my story allows someone to be free from this shame, then it was worth it. Most importantly, I don't want my children to go through the same sexual sins I went through, those generation curses...I don't want my children cursed!

Monica: What would you tell others, who are going through this embarrassment and shame?

Daniele: For one thing, it is embarrassing. Satan wants us to stay there too (embarrassed). We can't let him dictate our lives any more! Don't be afraid to share with a true, godly friend. Remember, Satan can't hold it over your head if you've shared with someone.

Monica: I want to leave you with this scripture, Proverbs 28:13 says, "He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them, finds mercy." (NIV) Receive your deliverance this holiday season, and watch God do great things in your life.

Danilelle is single with two beautiful kids. She lives in Kentucky and owns Home Childcare Business. She works in the children's ministry, at her church and she minister's sign language.